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RE: Proprietary Interest - 5/20/2008 5:05:39 AM   
pinkwind


Posts: 367
Joined: 1/9/2005
Status: offline 		As a human being i would ultimately do what was in my own best interests if the one who said they cared for me and loved me failed to understand that a situation had arisen which was so detrimental to those interests that their lack of action regarding it forced me to break my own code of ethics where my slavery was concerned.

No contest, no conflict.


(in reply to BitaTruble)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: Proprietary Interest - 5/20/2008 5:18:44 AM   
Dnomyar


Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline 		Im with Michael on this one. Im not inclined to be a slave owner. If I were I would echo what Michalel said.

(in reply to whiteslavebitch)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: Proprietary Interest - 5/20/2008 5:19:58 AM   
ProlificNeeds


Posts: 1061
Joined: 5/19/2007
Status: offline 		What the slave believes to be the truth, may not be reality. What the master believes to be truth, may not be reality. Problem with basing actions on a personal belief is, sometimes personal belief is wrong.

I don't think I could answer either way, there are some sacrifices I would make, and some I would not. Ultimately my dividing line is, "Am I still happy?" if the answer is no, then I don't see the point in staying. A compound might be "Will I be able to be happy later on if I tough this out?" again if no, then I walk.

Someone can't SAY they have my best interests at heart, unless they prove it through actions, and sorry but forcing me to be miserable wouldn't be in my best interest. Actions and words gotta match for me not to tell them they are full of shit.

(in reply to whiteslavebitch)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: Proprietary Interest - 5/20/2008 7:13:08 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BitaTruble

Here's the scenario for the Master types:

It is in your best interest that you keep your slave. It is in your slaves best interest that you release them. What, if any, sort of situation would need to be taking place in order for you to override what is best for you and do what is best for your slave? Do you feel that by doing what's best for you, as a Master, that that is what's best for your slave as well? Something else?



Celeste

I'm not sure if this applies, but I'll throw it out there anyway.

Before the end of next month, My sub will be leaving here and over the course of the following months will be preparing to return to Iraq.  This is absolutely not in My best interests.  I'm not even especially sure it is in his best interests.  It is if you look at it from the perspective that, should he not report for duty, there are some very serious consequences to be dealt with.  (Mistress Military tends to do what is right for Her, rather than Her property.)

So, while it is absolutely not what I want, he will be sent.  However, I am not using the term release. 




_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to BitaTruble)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: Proprietary Interest - 5/20/2008 8:04:01 AM   
slavegirljoy


Posts: 1207
Joined: 11/6/2006
From: North Carolina, USA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

I'm not sure if this applies, but I'll throw it out there anyway.

Before the end of next month, My sub will be leaving here and over the course of the following months will be preparing to return to Iraq.  This is absolutely not in My best interests.  I'm not even especially sure it is in his best interests.  It is if you look at it from the perspective that, should he not report for duty, there are some very serious consequences to be dealt with.  (Mistress Military tends to do what is right for Her, rather than Her property.)

So, while it is absolutely not what I want, he will be sent.  However, I am not using the term release. 

Not to get all political here but, this could be seen as in your best interest if, you consider what he is doing is serving his (and your) nation's interests by fulfilling his obligation to the oath he took when he volunteered for military service. 
 
Now, i could see how his volunteering for military service, in the first place, could be viewed as not in your best interest, because of the fact that military duty takes precedence over all else and it's potentially very dangerous to the service member.  But, if he volunteered before he began serving you, then that is a previous obligation that he brought with him that he still must fulfill, unless he reneges and takes the penalties for it, which, i think, would still not be in your best interest because it would likely mean jail time for him.  Besides, would you really want a man serving you, who you know doesn't fulfill his obligations?  Probably not, right?
 
If you aren't releasing him, then he is still serving you, just from a distance for the time being. 
 
Btw, i pray for his safe and swift return and i thank him for doing the dirty work that i feel is very valuable and that i would choose to do, if the Army would take me back.  But, for some reason they don't want a 50+ y.o., 1-legged woman.  Don't know why.  i can still shoot a rifle and operate a radio.
 
joy
Owned servant of Master David 

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Proprietary Interest - 5/20/2008 8:09:32 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		Thank you, joy.  Every word of what you say is true.  I'll be happy to show him this post, so that he can see that you thanked him yourself.  I have seen your prior posts, and know this is how you truly feel on the subject.

I wish you and Master David My best.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to slavegirljoy)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Proprietary Interest - 5/20/2008 8:44:07 AM   
slavegirljoy


Posts: 1207
Joined: 11/6/2006
From: North Carolina, USA
Status: offline 		You are most welcome, LadyPact, and i'm so glad that you will pass my well wishes and expressions of gratitude on to him.  They are sincerely heartfelt. Your well wishes for Master David and me are appreciated, too. 
 
Btw, your sacrifice (no matter how small you might think it to be) is also appreciated because, having been the wife of a soldier, i know what it means to have to be separated for months at a time and it's not easy. 
 
joy
Owned servant of Master David

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Proprietary Interest - 5/20/2008 9:23:41 AM   
subtee


Posts: 5133
Joined: 7/26/2007
Status: offline 		~FR

Really interesting question. I took the hypothetical to be not about feelings or opinions but statements of facts--she's better off if she's released, it's to her detriment to stay--not because she believes it or is unhappy or has asked for release. It would behoove him to keep her, in spite of her detriment, again, not because he thinks she's unhappy, it's just a fact (cosmically, or whatever), that although his life will be improved with their continued relationship, her's will not. His wisdom will dictate.

I honestly can see this as being realistic and workable. How many people have relationships in which it is, on all levels and within the myriad facets of the relationship, to the betterment of both to be together? Accomodation for another, it seems to me, often involves situations both huge and tiny--and the full continuum between both--in which it is "better" for one, "worse" for the other. I can't think of a relationship formed in which this is not the case. I can envision a relationship in which the benefit to the Dominant is so great that the detriment of the submissive is not destructive to her and the relationship will work .

However, if the detrimental circumstance continued over the long term proves to be overwhelmingly damaging to one, then I believe the relationship will likely be damaged as well.

It seems to me, time will answer, and the wise Dominant will listen.



_____________________________

Don't believe everything you think...

(in reply to slavegirljoy)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Proprietary Interest - 5/20/2008 9:43:16 AM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: subtee
However, if the detrimental circumstance continued over the long term proves to be overwhelmingly damaging to one, then I believe the relationship will likely be damaged as well.

It seems to me, time will answer, and the wise Dominant will listen.




I loved this answer on so many levels.  Thanks for putting it out there.

_____________________________

Good is the enemy of great.

(in reply to subtee)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: Proprietary Interest - 5/20/2008 10:18:53 AM   
slavegirljoy


Posts: 1207
Joined: 11/6/2006
From: North Carolina, USA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie

quote:

ORIGINAL: subtee
However, if the detrimental circumstance continued over the long term proves to be overwhelmingly damaging to one, then I believe the relationship will likely be damaged as well.

It seems to me, time will answer, and the wise Dominant will listen.

I loved this answer on so many levels.  Thanks for putting it out there.

Absolutely, 100% agree.  Thank you, subtee, for posting this. 
 
A wise Master is a watchful Master who knows when something is amiss and needs to be addressed.  Put yourself in good hands and they will take good care of you, no matter what life happens to throw at you. -- Just my take on things.  Might not be true for all.
 
joy
Owned servant of Master David

(in reply to ownedgirlie)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: Proprietary Interest - 5/20/2008 10:34:56 AM   
BitaTruble


Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: subtee

~FR

Really interesting question. I took the hypothetical to be not about feelings or opinions but statements of facts--she's better off if she's released, it's to her detriment to stay--not because she believes it or is unhappy or has asked for release. It would behoove him to keep her, in spite of her detriment, again, not because he thinks she's unhappy, it's just a fact (cosmically, or whatever), that although his life will be improved with their continued relationship, her's will not. His wisdom will dictate.


Spot on. That was exactly the intent of the OP.

quote:


However, if the detrimental circumstance continued over the long term proves to be overwhelmingly damaging to one, then I believe the relationship will likely be damaged as well.

It seems to me, time will answer, and the wise Dominant will listen.




I have to thrown in with the other ladies who responded to this. Well said!

Quick note to LP: I will add my well wishes to Joy's and hope for a speedy and safe return of your slave. My thanks, too, for his service and the sacrifice you both must make at this time. My fathers family has a long history of military service and I do hold the men and women who serve and their family's who stay behind in great esteem regardless of how I may feel about any particular war or conflict which may be taking place.

Celeste

_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."


(in reply to subtee)
Profile   Post #: 51
RE: Proprietary Interest - 5/20/2008 10:45:41 AM   
BitaTruble


Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline 		::snipped for brevity::

quote:

ORIGINAL: SleepyDom

Oh I know why I'm having such a hard time coming up with an example.  It's because I feel that she's part of me, an extension of me. 


Okay. Wow. Amazing post. I totally get it. This is what Himself was trying to tell me. I think I knew it, but couldn't pull it up to the surface. My brain doesn't embrace a concept very well unless I see it for myself regardless of what someone else, even the Master has to say about it. I couldn't understand the language he used to describe this, but now that I get it, I do see it's exactly the same as what you've written here (the entire post, not just the part I snipped out), so thank you so much for screwing in my lightbulb.

Celeste

_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."


(in reply to SleepyDom)
Profile   Post #: 52
RE: Proprietary Interest - 5/20/2008 12:15:09 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BitaTruble


Quick note to LP: I will add my well wishes to Joy's and hope for a speedy and safe return of your slave. My thanks, too, for his service and the sacrifice you both must make at this time. My fathers family has a long history of military service and I do hold the men and women who serve and their family's who stay behind in great esteem regardless of how I may feel about any particular war or conflict which may be taking place.

Celeste

Celeste, it is very much appreciated.  I think many would be amazed to know just how much good it does to hear well wishes.  Please accept My thanks and pass along My regards to Himself.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to BitaTruble)
Profile   Post #: 53
RE: Proprietary Interest - 5/20/2008 12:47:12 PM   
denika


Posts: 619
Joined: 8/30/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BitaTruble
For the Slave types:

If your Master would not release you even if it was in your best interest that he do so, would you walk anyway or do you feel that as the slave, your duty is to fill your Master's interests before your own, so you would stay? Something else?

Celeste


It comes down to what is healthy, not just being a slave or a Master, an unhealthy relastionship is just that. It takes two(or more) people to start a relationship but only 1 to end it, D/s or not.   Personally, I would try and work through what the problem was to begin with, relationships are not disposable but there also comes the point where they can be toxic as well. I would rather walk away and salvage a friendship than stay to long and end up hating each other ( this is what happened with Rob and I, 18 years together -non D/s-which, honestly is neither here nor there. We have both grown apart in the last few years and before we get to the resenting/hating stage it was better to step back now and save the freindship that  started the relationship to begin with) Neither of us could point fingers at any one thing, we just fell out of love at the same time.  If one person is still in love tho and the other isn't, that's when it gets messy. Any relationship ending is going to be painful even if there is releif in there as well.

On the point as a slave, yes it is my duty to fulfil my Master's needs. but his first  order is to protect his property (being me) from harm, physical and emotional. I also hope that most Master/slave relationships are more multifaceted than just a sense of duty.

Wolf's very happy and healthy denika  :)

(in reply to BitaTruble)
Profile   Post #: 54
RE: Proprietary Interest - 5/20/2008 2:00:32 PM   
slavegirljoy


Posts: 1207
Joined: 11/6/2006
From: North Carolina, USA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SleepyDom

Whew, I feel like I've just written a paper, an Ode to M/s Love.

SleepyDom, i really liked your Ode to M/s love.  And, i know what you're saying.  When my Master and i began our relationship, it wasn't a love relationship.  i was here to fulfill the duties that i had agreed to, to be His property and serve His needs.  But, over the 2 1/2 years that i have been by His side, taking care of Him, things have changed.  First, He had a back injury, the 2nd month i was here, and that was very difficult for Him and He wasn't able to do the things He liked.  Then, His mother became very ill and we had to move in with her and take care of her and then watch her die and it was very, very stressful, especially for my Master. 
 
There wasn't much about the way we were living that was anything like what we had talked about and agreed to, except for one.  He was committed to being my Master and being in charge of me and i was committed to being His slave and obeying Him.  Most of what i was experiencing with Him, i hadn't signed-up for and He told me, more than once, that if i wanted to find another Master, He would understand and even help me.  i told Him, that i had made a commitment to being His property for life and i wasn't leaving unless He wanted me to leave.  i stayed and have taken care of Him, the best i can, through everything and, over time, love has started to grow between us. 
 
Needless to say, while the OP was a hypothetical and that is how i responded to it, in my particular relationship, i can't see anything ever causing me to feel that i would need to leave my Master for my own best interest.  Becoming the slave to my Master has been the best thing to ever happen to me and, it is in my best interest to be His until the day i die.  i know what it's like to lose my right leg and being without my Master would be so many times worse than that.  i would be lost.  Thank you for writing your beautiful Ode.
 
joy
Owned servant of Master David

(in reply to SleepyDom)
Profile   Post #: 55
RE: Proprietary Interest - 5/20/2008 6:52:03 PM   
SleepyDom


Posts: 118
Status: offline 		Thanks Bitatruble and slavegirljoy for your compliments.  I'm sure you both know what a precious thing you have going, and I'm a little jealous as I've only had a little taste of that, but one that made an indelible impression on me.  I've been on a very long dark journey (emotionally, not kink-wise) and it looks like I'm returning to my original mushy self.   I know what it's like to be lost and even get used to it a bit (that's a crazy thing) but I think I'm ready to love again ... well as soon as I finish up this project I got going, though love has its own timetable.

(in reply to slavegirljoy)
Profile   Post #: 56
RE: Proprietary Interest - 5/22/2008 5:18:26 AM   
heartfeltsub


Posts: 1641
Joined: 11/5/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BitaTruble

Thanks to everyone for the thoughtful, wonderful responses. When I posed the question I hadn't really thought about a slave who was requesting release because she no longer desired to serve or was unhappy, but I didn't make that clear in the OP and, well, how come ya'll aren't mind readers? ::grins::

SleepyDom got pretty close to what I was thinking about when I posed the OP.

On the other hand if she doesn't believe that it's in her interest to leave or doesn't even really think about it because she's completely trusted me to make that sort of call, then we're talking about an internal dilemma of sorts where I might feel I'm being a little selfish for keeping her when in fact she'd be better off otherwise.  This is interesting in the abstract, but I have a hard time thinking up an example. 


I don't know whether that clarified my question for everyone but if there are further thoughts, I'd love to hear them.

I'm a bit torn on the issue (one of the reasons I brought it to the boards in the first place was for differing perspectives). On the one hand, from my slave perspective, his best interest is more important to me than my best interest. The idea of him putting me first kind of squicks me. For him to release me because it's in his best interest would be much easier for me to understand and embrace. On the other hand, again from my own slave perspective, the decision is his to make and if he decides to put my interests ahead of his, then by my own definition of slave (which I try my best to live by) I would accept that decision and, I guess, go away if that's what he told me to do even if I didn't want to leave.

Yanno .. what day is it? I think I must be hormonal because even though I posed the question, writing out the idea of it is making me kind of sad and it's just a hypothetical.

Gawds.. I'm a fucking mush.

Celeste






Though i didn't answer this intially, mostly because i don't classify myself as a slave, once i read this post, i realized that i do have something to add to this discussion. i have actually experienced this from the perspective of being the s-type that was released for my own good, although i did not want to be released. The other reason that i didn't respond earlier, it that it was during a "dating" phase and not a long-term committed phase, so i wasn't sure it actually applied.

However, in January of this year, was released by the Dominant that i was serving because staying with Him would have hurt me financially and familially (not sure that is a word), ie. less income and less time seeing my kids and grandkids. i did not want this to occur, but He knew He was holding me back. It has turned out to be the best thing in the world for me, have started my own business, and get to see my kids and grandkids much more often.

Not sure if that entirely applies to what you were asking Celeste, but it seemed to fit to me.

heartfelt

_____________________________

Life is an exciting business, and most exciting when it is lived for others.

Life is a succession of lessons which must be lived to be understood.

Life is either a great adventure or nothing.

Helen Keller

50 NZ points

(in reply to BitaTruble)
Profile   Post #: 57
RE: Proprietary Interest - 5/22/2008 5:56:44 AM   
Justme696


Posts: 3236
Joined: 1/7/2008
From: Royal kingdom of the Netherlands
Status: offline 		A Dominant that doesn't allow you to see your own kids? Yes I can imagine you release was a real release then.



_____________________________

~Been there, done that, got the t-shirt

(in reply to heartfeltsub)
Profile   Post #: 58
RE: Proprietary Interest - 5/22/2008 1:09:46 PM   
daddysprop247


Posts: 1712
Joined: 6/24/2005
From: DC Metro area
Status: offline 		like slave joy, i cannot conceive of a circumstance where it would be in my best interest to be released from my Master, unless he simply wished to release me. that is the only situation in which i ever would wish to be released, if i were not wanted. but speaking hypothetically only, if i were to go to my Master and beg relase but he did not wish to let me go, obviously i would have no choice but to remain on as his slave. and i would continue to serve him to the very best of my abilities, not become slack or serve with a negative attitude simply because things were not as i would like. there is also the fact that my Master would never permit me or any slave he owned to leave him of their own volition. He would take whatever means necessary to prevent such a thing, and if by some chance he failed he would use every resource to track down his property and bring it back home. but to be honest i cannot imagine ever trying to leave him.

(in reply to Justme696)
Profile   Post #: 59
RE: Proprietary Interest - 5/22/2008 9:43:26 PM   
adoracat


Posts: 1779
Joined: 2/16/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie

What an interesting thread.

Bounty, MadRabbit and KoM (unless I missed anyone else) were the only ones who didn't assume the slave wanted to be released in your scenario.  There could also be a scenario in which it was the best interest of the slave to be released, while both the slave and the Master want to stay together. 



yes, THAT.  that's whare i am now.  i'm moving from florida to texas. i am not likely to come back except to see my children occasionalky, and that doesnt leave me wriggle room to be able to see Daddy.

it would be in his best interest (in my point of view) to release me so that he could find someone more local to him, and easier to visit/serve him.  he is NOT agreeing with me at all....and refuses to relase me, even though he knows that i am going to be with another dominant.

the tentative solution is that he remains Master, and TheEngineer becomes Sir.  its an imperfect solution at best.  *sighs*

kitten

(in reply to ownedgirlie)
Profile   Post #: 60
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