quote:

ORIGINAL: TNstepsout

Yes, but I think that NOT knowing what you are will make it even harder. 

quote:

ORIGINAL: MladyHathor

may mean never finding what You desire.
 
                                 Thoughts?

quote:

ORIGINAL: MladyHathor

Sometimes I think I think too damn much and that's where these  " why is there air questions" come from--and its stupid I'm sure----many of you have read the challenges we faced these last 2.5 years----this year each day, I find Myself, more Myself since we lost Mom---a better self, but more the energy, the passion, the Me I have grown to be and that ( arrogantly, narcisstically) I REALLY love--I'm excelling at work, home is great, I lovelove the garden and the horses and so much closer to My teen---so life is busy---99% of the time, I toodle along then every once in awhile, the wind blows and I wonder if who I am will see Me with the last element I want in My life---a deep loving D/s relationship---I come and go, think yes, think no--but it is a pull that seems to get more so at times---and I wonder as I wander out under the stars...
 

quote:

may mean never finding what You desire.

Thoughts?

quote:

ORIGINAL: thetammyjo

I doubt that any semi-functional human being is only one thing, one role, one personality type, etc.

I think what aids in relationship disappointment is when we get too focused on a small group of things and refuse to consider a wider picture.

As much as I may praise my slave on here he is no where near perfect; neither am I. I wasn't looking when I got him, I was simply open to possibilities.

If one is not in a relationship I think one needs to be more open. That does not mean giving up on desires or a short list of "musts" but be realistic about what is possible.

If you are poly and already in one or more relationships then you can start to get really picky. Yes, I can put up a very specific list of what I'd consider in my profile because frankly I don't need or actively desire another person at this time. I'd be a fool, since I'm poly, though to close myself off from everything. The result is I can be super picky right now.

So for folks who are still looking and feeling frustrated I say look at yourself and your expectations first. If you can, expand them and be more realistic. If you won't or can't do that, then maybe you need to accept that your search is likely to be very long and very frustrating. You may find that just accepting that lessens your frustrations.

I think you're right on target TammyJo.  Being open to the possibilities by not limiting yourself to a narrowly defined list along with being realistic about yourself and about others is what will open the doors to creating beautiful relationships that might have otherwise passed you by.  It is indeed the big picture that counts.  There are things that I enjoy which I'd gladly give up or do without for a relationship with a woman who overall met my needs. 

It would be silly of me to not consider a relationship with someone because one of our kinks didn't match, she was XX pounds overweight, she didn't have the right color eyes, was younger than XX, didn't have a college degree, didn't like to do all the same vanilla things I do, etc.  Knowing what's really important to me in the other person is what counts.  Someone who's intelligent that I can have a great conversation with, may not have a college degree, so why should that matter to me?  I'd never make the cover of GQ (well maybe 20 years ago ), so why would I expect her to look like she stepped off the cover of Vogue?  I try to look inside a person and from talking with them I find I can always find the beauty within them.  I find it always shows through to where what's on the outside doesn't matter and all I ever see is what's on the inside.  I could go on, but I think I've conveyed the idea. 

Updated Journal this week.  Wyatt missing 4-1/2 weeks now.

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

This probably doesn't help, but I don't see you not ever getting what you want.  I can't believe that there won't be that match out there for you.

Suddenly the line from the song popped into my mind, which I think is also the title, "You don't always get what you want, You get what you need!"

quote:

ORIGINAL: pixelslave

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

This probably doesn't help, but I don't see you not ever getting what you want.  I can't believe that there won't be that match out there for you.

Suddenly the line from the song popped into my mind, which I think is also the title, "You don't always get what you want, You get what you need!"
 
 - pixel

quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar
Steffie. Mmmmm I always thought the path to enlightment was thru me. Looks like all the women in here were misleading me.

quote:

ORIGINAL: MladyHathor

may mean never finding what You desire.
 
                                 Thoughts?

quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar

Romantic love. Im swooning and starting to feel faint.  An intresting point was brought up. I would rather embrace who I am and be alone than settle for less than I desire.  Thats BS. Thats saying that you will not compromise. Knowing who you are is all and well but no man/woman is an island.