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How do you know... (Drama-ish) - 5/22/2008 5:55:26 AM

chaah

Posts: 10
Joined: 10/24/2007
Status: offline

How does one know if he/she is released if they are not told?

This is probably too much drama for some but here is my situation...

I have served a Domme (whom I have known for 2 years) online for about 8-9 months with established plans to travel and stay with her for three months early next year. We have had some difficulties recently. i upset her greatly almost three weeks, but she told me everything was okay and we would work through it. It seemed as though everything was okay though sometimes a little tense. Then the other day I did not hear from her. Nor did I yesterday, then early yesterday I discovered that she has blocked me on all on the various IMs on which we have spoken. She has not responded to my email.

I do not know what happened, why it happened. I do not know if this is temporary, permanent, if something else happened I cannot guess, or what.

How do I know if she has chosen not to keep me? How long should I wait before I assume this is the case? Is it disrespectful for me to presume to identify myself as her property still, though she may have found me unworthy and chose not to own me?

Post #: 1

RE: How do you know... (Drama-ish) - 5/22/2008 6:08:26 AM

mztresn0w

Posts: 174
Joined: 1/12/2008
Status: offline

Difficulties could mean alot of different things. Was this something that had been discussed prior so you knew what would happen if you did something like that? Maybe this is part of your punishment. I don't want to know what you did. She is the only one that can answer your questions. I think it all depends on what the guidelines are for your relationship. I hope she talks to you and lets you know one way or the other.

_____________________________

Becareful what you ask for you may get it and then realize it wasn't what you wanted.
Wicked Evil Grin

(in reply to chaah)

Post #: 2

RE: How do you know... (Drama-ish) - 5/22/2008 6:08:53 AM

lanie38

Posts: 120
Joined: 9/14/2007
Status: offline

It's difficult to answer without her side of the story...but if you're saying that she's cut off all contact without any explanation I think you have your answer...

_____________________________

Don't be so humble...you're not that great. ~ Golda Meir

(in reply to chaah)

Post #: 3

RE: How do you know... (Drama-ish) - 5/22/2008 6:25:21 AM

chaah

Posts: 10
Joined: 10/24/2007
Status: offline

quote:

Was this something that had been discussed prior so you knew what would happen if you did something like that? Maybe this is part of your punishment. I don't want to know what you did.

It is not something there was a guideline to follow. When it was addressed after the fact, she told me she too blamed herself as she should have known and stopped it. She told me what to do to rectify the problem, and that if I failed, she would leave me. I did what I was to do in order to fix it.

She has punished me previously but eliminating contact which gives me hope that is what this is, but that other time she told me she was angry and would not speak to me for some time, and that I would know she was ready to speak when she contacted me. Since this time there was no warning, I think perhaps she is through with me. Then I think again that since she punished me with no contact, no attention before it could be the case now. My mind is like a puppy chasing its tail.

If she has released me, I worry it is disrespectful to her for me to claim I belong to her. But if she only wishes to punish me with this, then it would be horrible for me to consider otherwise. I do not know what is most proper for me to do.

(in reply to lanie38)

Post #: 4

RE: How do you know... (Drama-ish) - 5/22/2008 6:31:11 AM

mistoferin

Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline

Why don't you just call her....or drop by her house?

_____________________________

Peace and light,
~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

(in reply to chaah)

Post #: 5

RE: How do you know... (Drama-ish) - 5/22/2008 6:31:45 AM

KatyLied

Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline

He can't silly, it's an on-line thing.

_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to mistoferin)

Post #: 6

RE: How do you know... (Drama-ish) - 5/22/2008 6:34:47 AM

chaah

Posts: 10
Joined: 10/24/2007
Status: offline

If she wishes no contact, then it would be inappropriate to do so, even if we were not soley online at this time. I have her address for mailing her, but mail takes long, and also, it seems she wishes (at least for now) not to have contact with me.

(in reply to KatyLied)

Post #: 7

RE: How do you know... (Drama-ish) - 5/22/2008 6:40:53 AM

Dnomyar

Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline

Mabey she hit the block button by mistake. Mabey she deleted you by mistake. Mabey the pony express horse died. The mail rates went up. Did you send her enough money to cover the rise in postage. Did you read every message that she sent you. Did you read this last one she sent you?? Shit I just dripped some sarcasum on my shoe.

(in reply to chaah)

Post #: 8

RE: How do you know... (Drama-ish) - 5/22/2008 6:41:38 AM

Aileen1968

Posts: 6062
Joined: 12/12/2007
From: I miss Shore, New Jersey
Status: offline

Maybe she had a power failure.

_____________________________

(in reply to KatyLied)

Post #: 9

RE: How do you know... (Drama-ish) - 5/22/2008 6:42:07 AM

mistoferin

Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied
He can't silly, it's an on-line thing.

Ah!...You know I read the two year thing and missed the "online" part. I guess I will just never understand the attraction to online "relationships". To each their own but it just seems like a colossal waste of time and energy to me....and a situation that I can't see myself ever being able to actually invest feelings or emotions in. I gotta have that skin-to-skin thing going on. Maybe that is because I live in a cold climate and just can't imagine snuggling up with my computer on a cold winter's night.

_____________________________

Peace and light,
~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

(in reply to KatyLied)

Post #: 10

RE: How do you know... (Drama-ish) - 5/22/2008 6:44:25 AM

Emperor1956

Posts: 2370
Joined: 11/7/2005
Status: offline

FR: Ever hear of the book "He's just not that into you"?   Well, it applies to lesbian relationships, too.

It is possible, but unlikely, that your Mistress is incapacitated in some way (no internet connection, in the hospital, some sort of catastrophic illness or event). It is far more likely that she just isn't into you anymore, and because of the transient nature of online relationships, she simply is deleting your inquiries and smiling as she fucks you over. It is also quite possible that she's not at all what she claimed to be -- unattached? able to host your anticipated visit?   female?   of her stated age/height/weight etc.?   How well did you know her "online"? Did you have a phone number?   did you talk with her at random times throughout the day? I have noticed over years of following people in online relationships that fights occur or huge dramatic breaches take place shortly before the "online" is to end, and the "real time" is supposed to begin. In other words... it is very likely you've been taken in.   Consider it a lesson and move on.

I hope that none of the bad stuff is what is happening. You are painfully young and apparently painfully naive. But everyone learns the tough lessons sometime. It may be that this is your time, miss. Best of luck with it.

E.

Edited to add:   In the time between my reading the thread and posting my note, Dynomar, Misto and Aileen all weighed in. BOY are we a bunch of meanie-weenies! But still, correct.

< Message edited by Emperor1956 -- 5/22/2008 6:46:44 AM >

_____________________________

"When you wake up, Pooh," said Piglet, "what's the first thing you say?"
"What's for breakfast? What do you say, Piglet?"
"I say, I wonder what's going to happen exciting today?"
Pooh nodded thoughtfully.
"It's the same thing," he said.

(in reply to chaah)

Post #: 11

RE: How do you know... (Drama-ish) - 5/22/2008 6:53:11 AM

mistoferin

Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Emperor1956
Edited to add: In the time between my reading the thread and posting my note, Dynomar, Misto and Aileen all weighed in. BOY are we a bunch of meanie-weenies! But still, correct.

Well I've been called a meanie lots of time...but never a weenie!!! I suddenly feel like I'm anatomically incorrect.

_____________________________

Peace and light,
~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

(in reply to Emperor1956)

Post #: 12

RE: How do you know... (Drama-ish) - 5/22/2008 7:01:36 AM

chaah

Posts: 10
Joined: 10/24/2007
Status: offline

quote:

Dnomyar: Mabey she hit the block button by mistake. Mabey she deleted you by mistake. Mabey the pony express horse died. The mail rates went up. Did you send her enough money to cover the rise in postage. Did you read every message that she sent you. Did you read this last one she sent you?? Shit I just dripped some sarcasum on my shoe.

*is confused*

quote:

mistoferin: I guess I will just never understand the attraction to online "relationships".

They are complicated. :( But we knew each other so long (over a year) before we began that it came perfectly naturally to us. She and I worked better together than my first and only IRL Domme and I did.

quote:

Emperor1956: FR: Ever hear of the book "He's just not that into you"? Well, it applies to lesbian relationships, too.

It is possible, but unlikely, that your Mistress is incapacitated in some way (no internet connection, in the hospital, some sort of catastrophic illness or event). It is far more likely that she just isn't into you anymore, and because of the transient nature of online relationships, she simply is deleting your inquiries and smiling as she fucks you over. It is also quite possible that she's not at all what she claimed to be -- unattached? able to host your anticipated visit? female? of her stated age/height/weight etc.? How well did you know her "online"? Did you have a phone number? did you talk with her at random times throughout the day? I have noticed over years of following people in online relationships that fights occur or huge dramatic breaches take place shortly before the "online" is to end, and the "real time" is supposed to begin. In other words... it is very likely you've been taken in. Consider it a lesson and move on.

I hope that none of the bad stuff is what is happening. You are painfully young and apparently painfully naive. But everyone learns the tough lessons sometime. It may be that this is your time, miss. Best of luck with it..

These are not the case, as two mutual friends of ours stated she was online during her normal time for being online. She simply put me on ignore/blocked me. If it were her leaving me/endign it/whatever, would it not be easier to state so, and need not deal with my asking, and possibly mutual friends asking? And I've not spoken to her at random times, only when she tells me she is available. But I do know she is female, as I have spoken to her and I was permited to view her web cam twice.

I do suppose you are right and I am quite naive though. I just do not know. :( Thank you for blunt, but kind response.

(in reply to Emperor1956)

Post #: 13

RE: How do you know... (Drama-ish) - 5/22/2008 7:01:55 AM

KatyLied

Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline

quote:

I can't see myself ever being able to actually invest feelings or emotions in.

Does this mean you won't cyber with me? ::sigh::

_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to mistoferin)

Post #: 14

RE: How do you know... (Drama-ish) - 5/22/2008 7:05:04 AM

Dnomyar

Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline

Will mail Aileen some new batteries so she won't have a power failure. misty put a heat lamp next to your computer. Emperor my winnie resents that remark.

(in reply to mistoferin)

Post #: 15

RE: How do you know... (Drama-ish) - 5/22/2008 7:06:38 AM

mistoferin

Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied

quote:

I can't see myself ever being able to actually invest feelings or emotions in.

Does this mean you won't cyber with me? ::sigh::

Oh I don't know....would that mean I'd have to buy a webcam??? Well, even if I did agree I have to warn you.....until I can feel you and smell you it's not going to do anything for me. And LOVE is completely out of the question!!!!!

_____________________________

Peace and light,
~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

(in reply to KatyLied)

Post #: 16

RE: How do you know... (Drama-ish) - 5/22/2008 7:07:35 AM

Dnomyar

Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline

Katy how can someone invest feelings and emotions with you when they can't look you in the eyes. Op you are taking this cyber stuff to hard.

(in reply to Dnomyar)

Post #: 17

RE: How do you know... (Drama-ish) - 5/22/2008 7:09:09 AM

mistoferin

Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar
misty put a heat lamp next to your computer.

Oh sure....follow the directions of the dom and wake up to a big puddle of expensive melted plastic and third degree burns!!!!

_____________________________

Peace and light,
~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

(in reply to Dnomyar)

Post #: 18

RE: How do you know... (Drama-ish) - 5/22/2008 7:19:11 AM

happypervert

Posts: 2203
Joined: 5/11/2004
From: Scranton, PA
Status: offline

quote:

I have to warn you.....until I can feel you and smell you it's not going to do anything for me. And LOVE is completely out of the question!!!!!

No worries -- she'll just send you some used panties. It'll be just like having her there!

_____________________________

"Get a bicycle. You will not regret it if you live." . . . Mark Twain

(in reply to mistoferin)

Post #: 19

RE: How do you know... (Drama-ish) - 5/22/2008 7:24:56 AM

Dnomyar

Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline

happypervert you should open my truck glovebox. Ok misty ya got me there. How about a heating pad instead a vibrating one.

(in reply to happypervert)

Post #: 20

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