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LovingWhip -> Gifts (5/26/2008 6:37:45 AM)

I have a boy who is insisting on giving me a gift to prove that he is serious.   I'm willing to let him, but I'd rather not give him my personal information yet.  What is the best way to do that?  I'm thinking that there must be a way on amazon, but I am open to anyone's suggestions or recommendations.



MstrDennynSlave -> RE: Gifts (5/26/2008 6:42:14 AM)

I'm not a Mistress, but might be able to help you. You could always have him mail a gift card/certificate to a P.O. box. Some cities also have places where you can have mail delivered to a box, just like the postal service does, but it isnt connected to the USPS. Or even an actual gift can be delivered to a P.O. box depending on the size of the gift. Hope this helps you out some.



JohnWarren -> RE: Gifts (5/26/2008 6:42:41 AM)

Get a post office box or one of those convenience mail boxes at a shipping store.



TermsConditions -> RE: Gifts (5/26/2008 7:11:15 AM)

 
Having read your profile let me state in my first sentence that my favorite color is OH MY GOD YOU ARE GORGEOUS! CAN I GIVE YOU GIFTS TOO?!? [:D]
 
I have no first hand experience with the situation you describe.
 
 A private mail box (PMB) such as provided by a UPS Store or similar might be OK to have him ship directly to you, but it will reveal your general location. And in this post 9/11 world PMB providers require residence and contact information. There is a risk that your boy might use "social engineering" to obtain your personal information.
 
A gift certificate seems a bit impersonal but there might be a middle ground. You could have your suitor purchase an Amazon gift card for an amount to cover item(s) that he has chosen for you. This way he can feel he is giving a specific gift and not a generic gift card. This gift card can be sent to you electronically (it's a set of numbers after all) as well as the Amazon items. If you wish to provide some direction for him you could create a presence on Amazon.com and post a wish list.
 
Your boy is a very lucky boy.

quote:

ORIGINAL: LovingWhip

I have a boy who is insisting on giving me a gift to prove that he is serious.   I'm willing to let him, but I'd rather not give him my personal information yet.  What is the best way to do that?  I'm thinking that there must be a way on amazon, but I am open to anyone's suggestions or recommendations.



MsStarlett -> RE: Gifts (5/26/2008 7:19:11 AM)

I have gifts sent to one of my trusted boys.  I explain that the address given is NOT MINE and perving him will not only get you no where close to me, it might get you into big trouble.



LadyHibiscus -> RE: Gifts (5/26/2008 7:20:05 AM)

I am guessing you haven't met this guy in person?  I think that my info is on my Amazon wish list, at least my full name is, so if you have trouble with him knowing that, you might just send him links for what you would like.  I have a PO Box, and have for years, it's one easy way of getting things~~though not the reason I got the box, I will add!

Terms, put it away!



faerytattoodgirl -> RE: Gifts (5/26/2008 8:38:47 AM)

tell him he can drop some $ in my paypal [8|]  one of these lifetimes someone will offer me $...DAMNIT.



AAkasha -> RE: Gifts (5/26/2008 9:05:22 AM)


Have him make a donation to the charity of your choice and send you a copy of the receipt.

Akasha



BoiJen -> RE: Gifts (5/26/2008 9:20:38 AM)

Some wish lists offer a screen name option and if he buys it for you it's shipped to you without him receiving the information. You have to research your online stores for that.



quillseeker -> RE: Gifts (5/26/2008 9:25:59 AM)

He is insisting on giving you a gift because he is aroused. Once it comes to actually pushing a button and sending a gift, he will falter and make excuses for not gifting. It is drawn out of a fear of being taken by fraud or more probably, he is a player. If he is serious, a gift certificate from amazon is non-threatening although a "gift slave" will hesitate because it's a totally impersonal act; even if used as a token of sincerity. Oh, and also easy money for quick-buck artists who prey on fools and their sexual desire.



pixelslave -> RE: Gifts (5/26/2008 9:31:36 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LovingWhip

I have a boy who is insisting on giving me a gift to prove that he is serious.   I'm willing to let him, but I'd rather not give him my personal information yet.  What is the best way to do that?  I'm thinking that there must be a way on amazon, but I am open to anyone's suggestions or recommendations.


Hmmm...  You're the Domme here right?  If you don't want to give him any way of discovering your personal information at the moment, then I suggest you tell him "NO" at this time.  To get a PO Box, one must divulge their personal information to the Post Office and it can be verified by anyone who wants to check it.  I can't say if that's the case for places like "Malboxes R Us", etc.  On Amazon, again you'd have to reveal a certain amount of personal information, such as your full name if I'm not mistaken, but you may be able to just reveal a user name.  I've not had a wish list there myself for use by others who weren't family, so I can't really say.
 
The bottom line is how comfortable do YOU feel in exposing yourself to this person's further electronic investigation?  Do you have all of his personal information?  If so have YOU checked him out?  Again, you're the Domme, so it's your decision as to how much you want to expose yourself to what sounds a bit like his topping from the bottom.  You can choose to set a boundary for now and change it at a later time. [&:]
 
 - pixel




RedMagic1 -> RE: Gifts (5/26/2008 9:32:19 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: AAkasha
Have him make a donation to the charity of your choice and send you a copy of the receipt.

This is an excellent suggestion, because it helps show that both Domme and sub are genuine.  I have to tell you, LovingWhip, your profile and first post red-flagged the hell out of me.



MladyHathor -> RE: Gifts (5/26/2008 10:11:40 AM)

The Private Mail box companies keep your info private---that's how I launder My money.[8D]



RumpusParable -> RE: Gifts (5/26/2008 10:20:05 AM)

Hahaha :D

But yes, I'd suggest setting up a PMB.  It'll let him know what area you're in, but I'm sure that's not likely a huge secret unless you live in a tiny town or village.  Personally, I'm not concerned about someone knowing I live in Augusta, GA.

Can't see where the red flags are in your profile, unless you've recently changed it from something else... when I just looked it's one of the more realistic and average ones.



RedMagic1 -> RE: Gifts (5/26/2008 11:48:00 AM)

Sorry, RumpusParable.  Her profile is that of an experienced dominant into female supremacy, but her first post is about a sub insisting he give her a gift before they meet, online-only, and she doesn't have the means to accomodate his demand.  Also, there's no mention in her profile of who the second person is in the photos (and that this second lady consented to have her photo on a BDSM web site).

Either she's for real, and is not clear about setting boundaries for either her friends or her potential subs, or "she" found some hot prom-party photos on Flickr.  I hope it's the first, and she gains more skill over time.



TermsConditions -> RE: Gifts (5/26/2008 11:52:35 AM)

I no longer launder my money; I have it dry cleaned. It wears better and they do a better job of pressing it. [:D]

quote:

ORIGINAL: MladyHathor

The Private Mail box companies keep your info private---that's how I launder My money.[8D]



orfunboi -> RE: Gifts (5/26/2008 1:35:52 PM)

I would let him know that you are the one in charge and no means no. According to your profile, your only looking for online friends. I'm not sure why he feels that requires gifts.

If you really feel the need to accept, then I would go with the suggestion of having him donate to your favorite cause or charity.



MsStarlett -> RE: Gifts (5/26/2008 1:40:34 PM)

hmmmm.... I admit that I didn't look at the OP's profile until RedMagic mentioned it.  Those really do look like some girl's party pics down loaded from Live Journal.  If I were a sub, I wouldn't send someone like 'her' gifts.  Just say'n.

(FYI - Anyone who ever sent me anything got pics of me IN the shoes, boots or dress.  I can provide referrals.  ;) )



hardbodysub -> RE: Gifts (5/26/2008 3:55:29 PM)

I'm with RedMagic and MsStarlett on this one, except that I think they're bending over backwards to be polite about it. I'd bet that the OP is a phony, looking for a way to accept gifts without giving herself (or, just as likely, himself) away. I'm not saying it's a proven fact, but is sure looks fishy. Just sayin'.



MySweetSubmssive -> RE: Gifts (5/26/2008 4:03:51 PM)

If you don't want gifts, there's no reason to find elaborate ways to accept them.  Say no.

Or ask him for a pound of Godiva chocolates and send them to *my* PMB.  (smiling)

Mss



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