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Specific techniques? - 5/29/2008 12:15:40 PM   
MakingYouSing


Posts: 2
Joined: 5/28/2008
From: Olathe, KS
Status: offline 		Hey, all.  New dom here.  I've got the headspace thing figured out, the mentality, but I''m working on specific tasks and techniques that help develop a submissive.  I know, to some extent everything is personalized, but I'm looking for suggestions from established masters who have specific techniques or tasks or what-have-you that have helped. 

Thanks!
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Specific techniques? - 5/29/2008 12:18:57 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		The first thing he taught me was how he liked his tea. The ordinary comforts of life. He'll eat quiche for lunch maybe once a year, he won't ever eat peas. He's fine with a bowl of peas on the table but not in soup or casseroles or such.

What matters to you? What are the little things that make you feel better or worse? Teach them.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to MakingYouSing)
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RE: Specific techniques? - 5/29/2008 7:55:00 PM   
SimplyMichael


Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline 		I have found that developing a genuine sense of modesty helped tremendously.  The other thing is that learning techniques without understand the concept behind them is meaningless.

(in reply to MakingYouSing)
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RE: Specific techniques? - 5/29/2008 11:12:41 PM   
peppermint


Posts: 5170
Joined: 10/18/2005
From: Montana
Status: offline 		I read your question to my Sir.  He says what helped him the most was hands on learning techniques from other more experienced Doms.  If he saw someone doing something he had no experience with, he'd ask the Dom to show him how to do it.  That's how he learned play piercing, suturing, single tails, etc.

(in reply to MakingYouSing)
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RE: Specific techniques? - 5/29/2008 11:13:00 PM   
antipode


Posts: 1787
Joined: 4/19/2004
Status: offline 		Your posting seems to indicate you think "being dom" is something one learns, or, as you put it, "figures out" - but dom is something you are, it is a state of being. And I must honestly admit I have never developed a sub with what-have-yous.

(in reply to MakingYouSing)
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RE: Specific techniques? - 5/29/2008 11:23:28 PM   
Archer


Posts: 3207
Joined: 3/11/2005
Status: offline 		One of the most natural training a service person techniques I ever heard was basicly Don't try to serve me for the next week simply shadow me and observe how I do things.
Additional training in how to observe not just watch may be required for some folks. observe with the idea that you will be expected to replicate the action, much like an OJT trainign week. This works better on slightly experienced service folks. Completely new folks may have a bit more difficulty.

Another basic technique that seldom goes wrong is the 3 step learning process 1. watch, 2. do with me, 3. do by yourself. This works well for those folks who learn through touch or visually as opposed to audio (listening).





(in reply to antipode)
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RE: Specific techniques? - 5/29/2008 11:30:38 PM   
DiurnalVampire


Posts: 8125
Joined: 1/19/2006
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline 		The basic technique that has always worked best for me is "Ask."
I have asked Fox to do dishes for me. I ask him to have coffee ready for me when I get home after work. I have asked him to do varous chores.I even ask him if he would like to hurt for me, some evenings.
Now, months later, most of the things I had asked have become understood tasks that barely need mentioning anymore. However, he wouldnt have known i wanted them without my asking first, and demanding he do them right off wold have made him too nervous about doing them correctly.
It always helps to ask.

DV


_____________________________

I will be your Dominate if you will be my submit - Fox

Snarko Ergo Sum
If you cannot change your mind, how are you so sure you still have one? -proverb

*Owner of Fox - collared 10/13/07*
VampiresLair

(in reply to Archer)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Specific techniques? - 5/30/2008 3:19:13 AM   
Focus50


Posts: 3962
Joined: 12/28/2004
From: Newcastle, Australia
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MakingYouSing

Hey, all.  New dom here.  I've got the headspace thing figured out, the mentality, but I''m working on specific tasks and techniques that help develop a submissive.  I know, to some extent everything is personalized, but I'm looking for suggestions from established masters who have specific techniques or tasks or what-have-you that have helped. 

Thanks!

Help develop a submissive.....  into.....  what?
 
I teach, or train, or develop MY submissive to do the things I require of her.  My most common or generalised technique is to tell/show her how I want whatever it is I want done then ask her, "Any questions?" 
 
Now, some things are complicated and she may need time to get it right....  That's fair enough, but once she demonstrates competency, then I'm not so understanding at her under-achieving....
 
Me, I'm not one for freely giving my secrets over to any ole self styled "new dom" - you might be some nilla looking to manipulate a naive newbie sub etc.  However, if and when you have a specific problem giving you grief through your general inexperience etc, I'll gladly offer some equally specific advice. 
 
IE, it's no good telling me you're a new dom - show it, first!
 
Focus.

_____________________________

Never underestimate the persuasive power of stupid people in large groups. <unknown>

Your food is for eating, not torturing. <my mum> (Errm, when I was a kid)

(in reply to MakingYouSing)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Specific techniques? - 5/30/2008 7:43:06 AM   
IronBear


Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Archer

One of the most natural training a service person techniques I ever heard was basicly Don't try to serve me for the next week simply shadow me and observe how I do things.
Additional training in how to observe not just watch may be required for some folks. observe with the idea that you will be expected to replicate the action, much like an OJT trainign week. This works better on slightly experienced service folks. Completely new folks may have a bit more difficulty.

Another basic technique that seldom goes wrong is the 3 step learning process 1. watch, 2. do with me, 3. do by yourself. This works well for those folks who learn through touch or visually as opposed to audio (listening).



I agree with this 100% with the exceptions of postures ort possitions i require a slave to take on command and these days my joints won't allow me to demonstrate but i do have and use diagrams and photos. The other thing I found (painfully) is that in the early days of service, do not allow the new slave to serve hot drinks. Odds are he or she will be nervous and spill the tea or coffee in your lap and you can bet it is scolding hot. (I have scares on my belly to show for one such instant.

Iron Bear
Master of Bruin Cottage
(A Victorian Lifestyle poly home)

"I judge a Man by what I see him do and not by what others tell me he does." (Captain Sir Edward Pellew of the HMS Indefatigable to Midshipman Hornblower ~ C.S. Forrester)


(in reply to Archer)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Specific techniques? - 5/30/2008 11:14:03 AM   
celticlord2112


Posts: 5732
Status: offline
quote:

One of the most natural training a service person techniques I ever heard was basicly Don't try to serve me for the next week simply shadow me and observe how I do things.

Now just how in the hell are you supposed to find reasons to punish the slave with a tactic like that?  Oh, sure, it actually works in the realm of real teaching, but still.....

Next you'll be advocating what, common sense?

(the horror....)


_____________________________



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Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Specific techniques? - 5/30/2008 11:32:17 AM   
Missokyst


Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline 		Hush.. we all know you guys learn these things by osmosis.. something only doms can do.  <g> Subs have to be dragged along until we get things right.
Kyst

(in reply to celticlord2112)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Specific techniques? - 5/30/2008 12:07:22 PM   
respectyourowner


Posts: 122
Joined: 2/27/2008
Status: offline 		I find that training a new slave is very hard work. After she was trained life got a lot easier. Make sure that you discipline in a way that she understands that you are upset when she messes up. If she thinks that it is fun to be "bad" she will be "bad". Punish her in ways that she does not like.



< Message edited by respectyourowner -- 5/30/2008 12:10:22 PM >

(in reply to MakingYouSing)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Specific techniques? - 5/30/2008 3:27:38 PM   
celticlord2112


Posts: 5732
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Missokyst

Hush.. we all know you guys learn these things by osmosis.. something only doms can do. <g> Subs have to be dragged along until we get things right.
Kyst

Well....slaves do have all that long hair for a reason, right?

_____________________________



(in reply to Missokyst)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Specific techniques? - 5/31/2008 4:42:03 PM   
Huntertn


Posts: 715
Joined: 10/7/2006
Status: offline 		what he says...celticlord2112..and..IronBear too....[still has scars to prove it too]
But what   DiurnalVampire says about long term training is very good too.  Even patton once said never give an order you know will Not be followed....

(in reply to celticlord2112)
Profile   Post #: 14
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