RE: It's all in a name...or is it?

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RE: It's all in a name...or is it? - 5/31/2008 8:56:06 PM

popoki

Posts: 11
Joined: 4/10/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: DreamyLadySnow

Why would anyone get hung up on a screen name, unless that's all they have?
Kinda sad I think.
(The exception being role-playing rooms where that sort of thing is the norm)

LS

My two cents, 2.0001 American.

Thank you for Your reply. Yes...sad indeed. But that is why I bring this up. So many are really hung up on this and yes..it is kinda. The cyber world is a fun, exciting and scary world.

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RE: It's all in a name...or is it? - 5/31/2008 9:20:53 PM

popoki

Posts: 11
Joined: 4/10/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

Hey, somebody used My name, so I had to show up.

I don't really see this as a point of respect. I'm actually going to go along and say that it's a matter of courtesy, and possibly based on familiarity. If I'm in a chat room, and it's someone that I've talked with before who knows Me, I'm fine with them calling Me LP or Lady P. (The same for here on the boards, if it's someone who has gotten to know Me a bit through My posts.) Most don't tend to call Me just Pact, which would be the closest to the OP's example. If it was someone that I'd never talked with before, I'd probably be a bit put off that they couldn't be bothered to type out the whole eight letters of a screen name.

Hello,

I understand what you are saying, but for me, it's just my personal preference not to use titles...ie "Lady" is one of them. So for me..it's not about "couldnt be bothered" to type out the addition letters. It's just not my way.

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popoki...

If you don't like something, change it. If you can't change it, change your attitude.
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Post #: 42

RE: It's all in a name...or is it? - 6/1/2008 2:13:03 AM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

Nothing wrong with personal preference. Both the person typing and the person being typed to have them. Maybe if it happens to you again, and someone is a pain about it, the easier route would be to shorten the entire thing with just the initials of the screen name. It might be a compromise that both you, and the person who had the issue with it, can chat happily with.

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RE: It's all in a name...or is it? - 6/1/2008 2:21:41 AM

steffie

Posts: 95
Joined: 6/8/2005
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      What's in a name? That which we call a rose
     By any other name would smell as sweet;
     So Romeo would, were he not Romeo call'd,
     Retain that dear perfection which he owes
     Without that title. Romeo, doff thy name,
     And for that name which is no part of thee
     Take all myself.

                Romeo & Juliet, Act II, Scene 2

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RE: It's all in a name...or is it? - 6/1/2008 6:05:11 AM

popoki

Posts: 11
Joined: 4/10/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

Nothing wrong with personal preference. Both the person typing and the person being typed to have them. Maybe if it happens to you again, and someone is a pain about it, the easier route would be to shorten the entire thing with just the initials of the screen name. It might be a compromise that both you, and the person who had the issue with it, can chat happily with.

Well yes. Oone would hope that - Thank you.

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popoki...

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RE: It's all in a name...or is it? - 6/1/2008 6:43:02 AM

orfunboi

Posts: 1223
Joined: 10/22/2005
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When I talk to people online, I use their screenname. If someones screen name is Goddessofall, then I call them Goddessofall. It doesn't mean I respect them, it's just a screenname. That said, I try to treat everyone with respect. It has nothing to do with BDSM, it's the way I was raised. If someone in the real world shows me they don't deserve respect, I stay away from them. If confronted with them in public, I still treat them respectfully. This doesn't have anything to do with them and everything to do with how I feel about myself and how I want others to percieve me.

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RE: It's all in a name...or is it? - 6/1/2008 6:58:00 AM

DianeB

Posts: 166
Joined: 1/30/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Usako

People just take things too seriously.

Yes, I agree. It's only a f---ing chatroom. If someone addresses me as Diane, who cares!
Real time is a different story...

Diane

(in reply to Usako)

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Post #: 47

RE: It's all in a name...or is it? - 6/1/2008 7:55:55 AM

TNstepsout

Posts: 1558
Joined: 8/3/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: popoki

Hello,

I just don't seem to find the kind of connection that I used to in the chatrooms. I used to, but not anymore. The lack of stimulating conversation is another. I have found very little to hold my attention in a chatroom....lately. I dont know really why...other then to say...maybe it's me. I don't want to open up in a room full of others I dont know. I dont want to even really try to.

Well that is a horse of a different color. You made it sound as if the only problem you have with chat rooms is that you feel pressured to use a persons full name. Sure there are problems with chat rooms, there are problems with every kind of social venue (they are after all, populated with people) but that's really a whole nuther discussion.

I can understand your desire to not use titles even if they are a part of a person's screen name. However you have entered a realm (and this exists in the real life BDSM world too) in which people often incorporate titles into the name they choose to be called. As a point of respect, and courtesy, it is better to err on the side of formality and call someone by their full chosen name, even if it is MistressherSuperDupernessGoddessofSweetSadisticLOVE. Leave it to them to tell you it's OK to shorten it, and tell you what they prefer. If you get tired of typing it, and they never offer, ask them. "Hey, MistressherSuperDupernessGoddessofSweetSadisticLOVE, do you mind if I call you Duper?" If they throw a fit and insist that you use the ENTIRE hideous name, then you can decide if that person is someone you want to deal with.

Basically, what you are doing is entering a world in which certain rules of courtesy apply, and then deciding that you don't like them, so you aren't going to observe them. That it's just your "way". What if you were immersed in another culture, such as the Japanese where you were expected to bow as a sign of courtesy and respect? Would you refuse to bow because it isn't your way? Would you then whine about how much they overeact because they found you to be rude and arrogant? If you did, you wouldn't be the first, that is after all, the American way. But is it mature? Does it foster understanding and communication with others?

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RE: It's all in a name...or is it? - 6/1/2008 3:43:29 PM

popoki

Posts: 11
Joined: 4/10/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: orfunboi

When I talk to people online, I use their screenname. If someones screen name is Goddessofall, then I call them Goddessofall. It doesn't mean I respect them, it's just a screenname. That said, I try to treat everyone with respect. It has nothing to do with BDSM, it's the way I was raised. If someone in the real world shows me they don't deserve respect, I stay away from them. If confronted with them in public, I still treat them respectfully. This doesn't have anything to do with them and everything to do with how I feel about myself and how I want others to percieve me.

Hello,

Yes, I agree. I feel the same wayI try and treat Eeveryone with respect. So long as I am treat the same. Again, for me...this has not to do with BDSM...it has to do with who I am as a person. I treat Oothers as I wish to be treated. Online...and in person.

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Post #: 49