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Unconditional Love - 6/3/2008 10:43:48 AM   
missturbation


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After spending a night away from home last night, i walked in to find my 12 year old cross border collie waiting for me at the top of the flat stairs. He absolutely hates it when i stay out all night and i hasten to add i have only done this twice since i've had him, and there is always someone here to look after him.
 
Anyway he's sat there at the top of the stairs giving me a  look between 'you abandoned me' pathetic look, 'im mad at you, you abandoned me' look and an 'im so glad to see you' look.
 
Turns out he couldn't help himself and came bounding to me for huge cuddles and fussing. 
 
Speaking to a friend a little earlier and i was telling them how Zak (my dog) hates to be left on his own but that he loves me so unconditionally he can't help but come for cuddles when ive abandoned him etc etc.
 
The reason i say it is 'unconditional love' is that i am 99% certain that no matter what i did to him he would still be 'my dog'. He would still love me, follow me around, sleep at the foot of my bed, protect me etc etc.
 
This lead me to thinking when anyone (human) i mean, says they love unconditionally or are loved unconditionally, is is strictly true?
 
I can see the love of your um being unconditional, i will always love my um no matter what she does. However when it comes to romantic / relationship love i can't see how it can have no conditions however big or small.
 
Anyone have any thoughts?
 
 
 
 

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RE: Unconditional Love - 6/3/2008 10:48:04 AM   
Lashra


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In my opinion with humans unconditional love is almost impossible. Yes I agree we can come pretty darned close, particularly with the love a Mother feels for a child. But in most cases there are certain factors that can make you fall out of love with another person, in most cases they would have to be something very major but its always there no matter who it is.

Animals don't think the way that humans do so therefore their love is fairly unconditional as long as their needs are met.

~Lashra


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RE: Unconditional Love - 6/3/2008 10:49:53 AM   
faerytattoodgirl


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yes its true unconditional love only exists in your pets... (non human kind)

edit:because humans usually have some sort of agenda for being with someone.  it didnt used to be this way...but is more so in the 21st century.



< Message edited by faerytattoodgirl -- 6/3/2008 10:50:47 AM >


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RE: Unconditional Love - 6/3/2008 10:52:46 AM   
kdsub


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Wouldn't you think it weird and boring if your human partner always loved everything about you?...I would... they would be a stalker.

Butch

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RE: Unconditional Love - 6/3/2008 10:55:53 AM   
faerytattoodgirl


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mmmm stalker.

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RE: Unconditional Love - 6/3/2008 10:56:51 AM   
missturbation


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Lashra

In my opinion with humans unconditional love is almost impossible. Yes I agree we can come pretty darned close, particularly with the love a Mother feels for a child. But in most cases there are certain factors that can make you fall out of love with another person, in most cases they would have to be something very major but its always there no matter who it is.

Animals don't think the way that humans do so therefore their love is fairly unconditional as long as their needs are met.

~Lashra



See, i think my Zak would love me even if i stopped feeding him or started beating him.
I never would of course
He apart from my daughter is the most precious thing in my life.

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RE: Unconditional Love - 6/3/2008 10:57:27 AM   
OmegaG


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there is always conditions, one loves their children because they have the connection, the history.  Your dog loves you because of the familiarity, the foundation that has been laid and the bond that is established.

Unconditional love would exist only if one could love a complete stranger, one that has no bonds, no familiarity or connection upon the very first meeting.  Actually, I guess that foster parents and adoptive parents come pretty darned close to unconditional love.  But there still is the condition of responsibility and choice that draws them to love a particular child as opposed to loving all children equally.

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RE: Unconditional Love - 6/3/2008 11:06:25 AM   
LaTigresse


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As I have said several times when this topic has come up on these forums.... I believe it is possible to love someone unconditionally.

Just because you love them does not mean you love everything they do, say, think, etc. It doesn't  mean you want to spend much time around them or, even like them much.

They may be someone that is just too difficult for you to be with, energy draining, painful in some way, or bring back memories you want to keep locked up.

None of those things are guarantees of love ending, ceasing to exist. There are people in my life that I do love without condition. I may not be able to be around them, may never even see them again. Yet the love isn't going to die. It's just there, no conditions, no expectations, it just is.


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RE: Unconditional Love - 6/3/2008 11:10:26 AM   
faerytattoodgirl


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Love me love me
say that you love me
fool me fool me
go on and fool me
love me love me
pretend that you love me
leave me leave me
just say that you need me

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RE: Unconditional Love - 6/3/2008 11:16:05 AM   
CyberDom08


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Sometimes, people will refer to men as "dogs", I say it is a great compliment. I had a relationship that was very close to unconditional love, I never had to worry about myself, only her needs and she took care of my needs. So if I wanted great oral, I gave great oral and was never disappointed.

In a D/s dynamic, it can be the same way. A servant needs to cast aside her wants and needs for her master and in having his needs met, he may meet the needs of his servant.

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RE: Unconditional Love - 6/3/2008 11:20:35 AM   
kdsub


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The silly power exchange dynamic bullshit again...Two different things... there is love then there is the weak and the strong. Weak does not necessarily equate to slave sub or dom either.  Only who is really in control.

< Message edited by kdsub -- 6/3/2008 11:47:47 AM >

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RE: Unconditional Love - 6/3/2008 11:39:47 AM   
SilentTigresss


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Since I am a animal lover, have "some" pets myself, I enjoyed your story better than your question. 
**nothing against your question**

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RE: Unconditional Love - 6/3/2008 12:02:19 PM   
DesFIP


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There is nothing like an animal's love. But I'm sure you would lose his unconditional devotion if you began neglecting or abusing him. So is it really unconditional?

I have and give to him, love, devotion and respect but we have boundaries which are needed to keep giving, or getting, those things. As long as I don't cheat, have clear communication, and am devoted to the strength of the relationship I cannot lose his commitment. And vice versa naturally.

So his unconditional love is there within certain boundaries. Just like your dog would stop coming to you if you met every approach with a swing from a baseball bat. Which obviously you wouldn't do.

On that note, my father spent most of a week in the hospital. During which time, I was staying in his apartment. His cat wouldn't eat, wouldn't interact, and was obviously miserable. She was overjoyed when he returned. There is nothing like the simplicity and purity of a pet's love.

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RE: Unconditional Love - 6/3/2008 12:22:41 PM   
Aynne


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Ohh missturbation,

You are so right. I lost both of my 14 year old labradors last year to bone cancer ( bastard!!! ) and yes they loved me better, deeper, purer and unconditionally more than any human ( parents included ) ever have.  Give Zak a huuuuge squeeze from me.

quote:

ORIGINAL: missturbation

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lashra

In my opinion with humans unconditional love is almost impossible. Yes I agree we can come pretty darned close, particularly with the love a Mother feels for a child. But in most cases there are certain factors that can make you fall out of love with another person, in most cases they would have to be something very major but its always there no matter who it is.

Animals don't think the way that humans do so therefore their love is fairly unconditional as long as their needs are met.

~Lashra



See, i think my Zak would love me even if i stopped feeding him or started beating him.
I never would of course
He apart from my daughter is the most precious thing in my life.


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RE: Unconditional Love - 6/3/2008 12:45:35 PM   
Mercnbeth


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quote:

I can see the love of your um being unconditional, i will always love my um no matter what she does.

 
isn't the fact that you are loving YOUR um, as opposed to someone else's, a "condition"?
 
quote:

Anyone have any thoughts?

 
this slave has always thought of unconditional love as the kind that doesn't have ANY conditions...neither the existence of a particular blood relation, expectations of reciprocity, compensation nor required behavior.

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RE: Unconditional Love - 6/3/2008 12:59:56 PM   
missturbation


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quote:

isn't the fact that you are loving YOUR um, as opposed to someone else's, a "condition"?


Yep, never thought of that

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RE: Unconditional Love - 6/3/2008 1:01:53 PM   
FirmhandKY


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uh ... some rain ... sorry ....

While I won't dispute that dogs (in particular) have emotions, and can even experience "love" for a human, a large part of the "unconditional" part is due to the pack nature and instinct of the dog.

A dog's "world view" if you will, revolves around his place in his pack, and how he reacts to the other members of the pack -be they canine or H. sapiens.

Generally, this pack loyalty can be seen as a deeper, more intense, instinctually driven subservience to the pack leader, and is physically expressed in a lot of ways - including the behavior that we may interpret as "unconditional love".

This instinct works well with humans, which is why dogs became so closely intertwined with us, over the millennium. We have used their pack instinct to bind them to us, and as a result, canines are one of the most successful species on the planet. There has even been some theorizing that man and dog are actually co-dependent species, and we have adapted and changed to accommodate them as well.

Yeah ... I've had the love of a good dog as well.

Firm

< Message edited by FirmhandKY -- 6/3/2008 1:03:18 PM >


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RE: Unconditional Love - 6/3/2008 1:05:49 PM   
Aynne


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Firm,

valid points all.  However....maybe it's a girl thing?  

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RE: Unconditional Love - 6/3/2008 1:09:56 PM   
missturbation


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quote:

A dog's "world view" if you will, revolves around his place in his pack, and how he reacts to the other members of the pack -be they canine or H. sapiens.


This pack mentality can also be said of humans but you very rarely see a human as devoted so unconditionally to a person as a dog is to his owner.
 
 



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If it fit's in a toaster, i can cook it.

Buying 10 item's or less is not shopping !!

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RE: Unconditional Love - 6/3/2008 1:16:31 PM   
missturbation


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quote:

Ohh missturbation,

You are so right. I lost both of my 14 year old labradors last year to bone cancer ( bastard!!! ) and yes they loved me better, deeper, purer and unconditionally more than any human ( parents included ) ever have.  Give Zak a huuuuge squeeze from me.


I'm really sorry for the loss of your two labs Aynne, it must have been heartbreaking.
I myself dread anything happening to my two dogs. Zak is pushing 12 now and has arthritus. Hes still a young pup though when given the chance of his lead on a field with a ball. Suffers for it after though.
Jake, the 4 month old puppy we nearly lost when he was 10 week old. He developed parvo and spent the weekend in puppy hospital. Hes only just really recovered and we still dont know what the long term effects will be. Parvo attacks the fastest growing cells in a pup and at his age Jakes fastest growing cell was his heart. He'll be about 12 months old before we can find out if any damage has been done.


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What you don't witness with your eyes, don't witness with your mouth. Proverb.

If it fit's in a toaster, i can cook it.

Buying 10 item's or less is not shopping !!

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