Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

Has this ever happened to you


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> Has this ever happened to you Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
Has this ever happened to you - 10/30/2005 3:17:20 PM   
swtnsparkling


Posts: 1738
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline
Has this ever happened to you: You go to a play party, BDSM club, Fetish Flea or some other event and you run into someone you know from work or Your pharmacist, mailman, kids teacher etc.. you catch my drift?
What would you do/how would you handle it?


< Message edited by swtnsparkling -- 10/30/2005 3:24:50 PM >

_____________________________

Never make anyone a priority who treats you as an option 2003

Walk in Peace
A "No" uttered from deepest conviction is better than a "Yes" uttered merely to please
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Has this ever happened to you - 10/30/2005 3:23:59 PM   
Delvin


Posts: 151
Joined: 8/23/2005
From: Texas
Status: offline 		Hey !!! I know you ! (with a big smile and an offer of a handshake) :)

I guess I would feel a bit giddy to know that my mailwoman was into kink as well

D

(in reply to swtnsparkling)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Has this ever happened to you - 10/30/2005 3:31:36 PM   
MztressRhiannon


Posts: 2
Joined: 11/20/2004
Status: offline 		Hello Swt,
Yes, this has happened to me. If it happens, first of all, don't be worried. They are at the same event as you are. Which means, they also must be into BDSM &/or the Lifestyle, and they have the same things to lose if word "gets out". If they see you, acknowledge them with a smile and a nod - not a verbal hello. If they wish to admit they already know you, they will come to you and speak to you. If not, do not mention that you know each other, or how you know each other. Some people do not wish to mix their BDSM and Vanilla lives. Respect their wishes and they should do the same for you.
If you see someone you know at an event or even if you meet someone new, then you see them out in the Nilla world, do NOT run up to them and say "Hey! Weren't you are so-&-so's party the other night? Just LOVED that Leather corset you were wearing!" (You get the idea, right?)... This is a major No-No. Some of us can't afford to have our Lifestyle become public knowledge. :)
Respect others' right to privacy and they will respect your's!

Rhiannon

(in reply to swtnsparkling)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Has this ever happened to you - 10/30/2005 3:39:52 PM   
Kasia


Posts: 442
Joined: 6/25/2005
From: The Coast of Adria
Status: offline 		Yes, couple of times in swinger clubs. I just make an eye contact and see if the person is willing to smile, nod, or whatever. If he/she averts her eyes and seems embarrased or unwilling to make recognition I let go and act like we never met. If he/she smiles or nods I return the same but dont insist on talking or communicating further.
And I never mention any of that in everyday situations, just like it never happened.

_____________________________

I DO have profile - just lost an S somewhere along the way

Kassia

(in reply to swtnsparkling)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Has this ever happened to you - 10/30/2005 4:14:57 PM   
swtnsparkling


Posts: 1738
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		It doesnt bother me in the least if some one see's me so what i really dont care. This situation has never happened to me though , but i welcome it if it did and hope they would want to make contact or say hello, if not i most certainly would respect their right to privacy.

_____________________________

Never make anyone a priority who treats you as an option 2003

Walk in Peace
A "No" uttered from deepest conviction is better than a "Yes" uttered merely to please



(in reply to MztressRhiannon)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Has this ever happened to you - 10/30/2005 4:15:00 PM   
Wildfleurs


Posts: 1650
Joined: 9/24/2004
From: Connecticut
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: swtnsparkling

Has this ever happened to you: You go to a play party, BDSM club, Fetish Flea or some other event and you run into someone you know from work or Your pharmacist, mailman, kids teacher etc.. you catch my drift?
What would you do/how would you handle it?



Despite living in the same town I've grown up in I have never run into anyone I know or work with at any sort of BDSM or alternative lifestyles event.

C~

_____________________________

"Just because you've always done it that way doesn't mean it's not incredibly stupid." -despair.com

~~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
The heart of it all - http://www.wildfleurs.com
~~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

(in reply to swtnsparkling)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Has this ever happened to you - 10/30/2005 4:24:01 PM   
ownedjulia


Posts: 218
Joined: 10/5/2005
Status: offline 		at my very first munch - the work colleque i sit two feet from

_____________________________

~julia
owned slave and proud of it!

(in reply to swtnsparkling)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Has this ever happened to you - 10/30/2005 5:27:58 PM   
IronBear


Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline 		I'm in the habbit of entering a room quietly so that few if any even notice I'm there at first, and scan the crowd for familiar faces. (Old habits die hard). yes I've done this and seen people I know. depending on my relationship with them, I may make eye contact or even wander over and greet them. In some cases, I'll pretend I haven't seen them especially if I know they would be devistated if they thought I recognised them. People's king time is personal in my book so why should I make some one's time uncomfortable? Only once have I walked over to a couple I know who I was told were new and "sugested" that they leave. The people I spend time with have no time for drug pushers or child molesters.

_____________________________

Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

(in reply to ownedjulia)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Has this ever happened to you - 10/30/2005 6:11:19 PM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline 		Master was at a party several years ago, and ran into his boss...who was a male sub.

My view is that they are there for the same reason I am.

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to IronBear)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Has this ever happened to you - 10/30/2005 6:30:59 PM   
thetammyjo


Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline 		Its happened to me with colleagues -- I don't really have bosses in academia.

I've even run into my students and former students. Frankly we're all there for the same reason.

I usually just smiled and nodded, don't go out of my way to make a scene or a connection with them. I ask later "are we cool" and have never been told we aren't or had it become a problem.

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to swtnsparkling)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Has this ever happened to you - 10/30/2005 10:18:10 PM   
wipmebeetme100


Posts: 198
Joined: 7/31/2005
Status: offline
quote:

Has this ever happened to you: You go to a play party, BDSM club, Fetish Flea or some other event and you run into someone you know from work or Your pharmacist, mailman, kids teacher etc.. you catch my drift?



It has not happened to me yet...and it would not be big deal for me if it were to. I am "out" to everyone who knows me. Now....who knows how they would feel?


cathy

_____________________________

Happiness is like peeing your pants: Everyone can see it, but only you can feel its warmth
~Unknown

(in reply to swtnsparkling)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Has this ever happened to you - 10/30/2005 11:26:39 PM   
SadistDave


Posts: 801
Joined: 3/11/2005
Status: offline 		I've never found it to be a problem. I'm about as out as you can get though. I was the source of much breakroom gossip for years at one job. I frequently left toys in the back seat of my car when I went to work directly from play parties.

-SD-


(in reply to wipmebeetme100)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Has this ever happened to you - 10/31/2005 6:00:26 AM   
FTopinMichigan


Posts: 571
Joined: 7/5/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: swtnsparkling
Has this ever happened to you: You go to a play party, BDSM club, Fetish Flea or some other event and you run into someone you know from work or Your pharmacist, mailman, kids teacher etc.. you catch my drift?
What would you do/how would you handle it?


I've always looked forward to running into people I know!

I have run into people that I used to work with, and one person was at their very first event, a Munch. While their reaction was completely inappropriate, in showing their enthusiasm through a rather loud exclamation AND explanation to those around, in how we knew one another, I was (surprisingly) not bothered by the outburst.

"After" her outburst, she realized her reaction and became concerned about her lack of discretion. I think running into me helped her feel more comfortable with coming out in the first place, and since our Munch group was the only ones in attendance, it didn't harm any patrons. Also, neither of us worked at the same place anymore.

Today, we still laugh out that first lifestyle encounter with one another.

There have been quite a few more, like that, and surprisingly, all from the same former employer. Hmmmmm!

K

PS Over the years, somehow my dad made friends with an old friend mine, at a private Club we used to attend. As we all started hanging around together, my old friend came to know of my interest in BDSM. I think my dad joked about it once, with me, and this man overheard it. Wellllll...that's all she wrote, cause then I had to hear ALLLLLLLL about HIS fetish interests, whether I was interested or not (and believe me I was NOT interested ). Circumstances have broken our relationship, but he keeps his fetish interest to himself now, although I think my dad finally figure it all out.

(in reply to swtnsparkling)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Has this ever happened to you - 10/31/2005 6:18:39 AM   
MasterRobert1


Posts: 225
Joined: 7/18/2005
Status: offline 		How about the other way around? I went to a clients and there in the waiting room was someone I knew from the dungeon I belong to. Made for an interesting situation, to say the least.

(in reply to swtnsparkling)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Has this ever happened to you - 10/31/2005 2:31:31 PM   
Orionandslave


Posts: 1
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		This is a slightly different, but related situation. How does it make you all feel....

How do you deal with finding out that a relation is in the lifestyle? How would you feel if it were your grandmother and that she and her diaper boy wanted to go to the club with you?

Orion

_____________________________

"Training is Everything"

(in reply to swtnsparkling)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Has this ever happened to you - 10/31/2005 2:36:43 PM   
IronBear


Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Orionandslave

This is a slightly different, but related situation. How does it make you all feel....

How do you deal with finding out that a relation is in the lifestyle? How would you feel if it were your grandmother and that she and her diaper boy wanted to go to the club with you?

Orion


In two words ~ Youlittlebeaudy! Goodonyagran!


_____________________________

Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

(in reply to Orionandslave)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Has this ever happened to you - 10/31/2005 3:50:42 PM   
MistressJenna


Posts: 20
Joined: 9/27/2005
Status: offline 		If I run into someone I know, I just look at it as will have more to talk about now!!

(in reply to swtnsparkling)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Has this ever happened to you - 10/31/2005 3:56:49 PM   
pinkpleasures


Posts: 1114
Status: offline 		i would wait for Gawd to strike me dead; i'm shy.

pinkpleasures

_____________________________



(in reply to MistressJenna)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Has this ever happened to you - 10/31/2005 4:29:44 PM   
swtnsparkling


Posts: 1738
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		I would be thrilled! i wish there was some in the family other than me. it's Not likey though my sister already thinks im a werido and i no longer have parents or grandparents.

_____________________________

Never make anyone a priority who treats you as an option 2003

Walk in Peace
A "No" uttered from deepest conviction is better than a "Yes" uttered merely to please



(in reply to Orionandslave)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Has this ever happened to you - 10/31/2005 4:43:41 PM   
phoenixMF


Posts: 23
Joined: 10/17/2005
Status: offline 		I would smile and give a little wave from across the room.

(in reply to swtnsparkling)
Profile   Post #: 20
Page:   [1] 2   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> Has this ever happened to you Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.094