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Daddysredhead -> RE: Do Y/you have a Phobia? (6/14/2008 11:18:45 AM)
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Lynnxz, you are horribly wicked. And I am horribly stupid. I just KNEW there would be pics of friggin' centipedes, but I clicked anyway. It's horrible because I felt my pulse start to race. I hate centipedes and crickets. On an online group that I mod, I told them that I HATE centipedes, and now, they have dubbed me "Princess Creepy-Crawly." *mutters something about putting them all on moderated posting status* So, I feel your pain. Unfortunately, since I have no one else to scream to kill them, I'm stuck with the job. Last time, I took my shoe and beat the lil phukker to death, threw it away, then started crying because I was so squicked. The Things laughed at my plight till I told them that they could kill the next one, then it was all, "Ewww, no!"
I used to be afraid of spiders till I lived in Sri Lanka. No one ever informed me that they have phukking tarantulas wandering in and out of the house. Then one night, as I reached for the light switch on the way to the bathroom, I saw what I thought was the wall clock, so I got close to it and flipped on the light. Mother of God... it was a tarantula about a foot away from my face. I screamed my phukking guts out, jumped on the bed, stomped the shit out of my husband, telling him to wake up and kill it. He woke up all crazy and saw what I was looking at, shooed me out of the room, got one of the servants to come help him trap it and dispose of it. I ran into the living room, crying hysterically, standing on the coffee table, every light in the house on, begging for someone to take me to the airport so I could go home. My entire set of in-laws were there for our wedding that was to occur that weekend, so me screaming at the top of my lungs that "this place phukking sucks" wasn't my ideal moment for tolerance and diplomacy.
The little servant kids were all talking in Tamil about what was going on, and I'll never forget my mother-in-law's reply to them as well as my little nephew in Sinhalese... "It's ok, our white missy saw a spider and has gotten herself all excited." These little cherubs laughed their collective asses off. The adults were just staring at me all sleepy-eyed. There I stood, on their furniture, crying and screaming, hyperventilating... it was straight from Indiana Jones and The Temple of Doom. From that night on though, my mother-in-law had one of the servant men go and check the bathroom for me every time I wanted to go pee or take a shower. I dubbed him "Spiderman." He liked it. But I really think the kids loved the fact that this poor "civilized" white girl was waking up the whole household because of a "spider."
(Personally, I don't think a tarantula that measures 10" in length and 5" in width qualifies as a spider. It's more like a daschound puppy.) I vowed after that, to never fear another spider in the States unless it was bigger than that. So far, so good. *whew*
Just see will you?
See what I mean?
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