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RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? - 6/19/2008 3:56:51 PM

Leatherist

Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
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I think the irony of the 18 year old kid who lives in his mother's basement and wanks off on the internet......Calling himself....Whatever pretentious title is what gets to me the most.

some people merit a title-but not many. It's rather sad, since it takes a lot away from those who have had to work for the respect that goes along with it. I believe that is the main gripe over title-asshats who took them-but never earned them at all.

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Post #: 41

RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? - 6/19/2008 4:32:44 PM

Kirata

Posts: 15477
Joined: 2/11/2006
From: USA
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Darkeyes83

I have noticed many people have the title of Master or Dom in their nicks... For those who bear it in their online monickers, at what point did you....

Forty responses so far, and only one from somebody with "Master" or "Dom" in their nick.

Ha!

K.

corrected: I missed MasterHermes the first time through

< Message edited by Kirata -- 6/19/2008 4:38:36 PM >

(in reply to Darkeyes83)

Post #: 42

RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? - 6/19/2008 4:40:04 PM

BootBlackBlast

Posts: 378
Joined: 10/23/2006
Status: offline

As a top and a dominant in most of my relationships I identify as such. I was first called a Daddy by a group of older gay leatherman here in San Francisco. I walked in one day to the bar, and they just said Hey Daddy come on over here and talk to us. I turned around expecting to see a 70 year old top to bottom leatherman behind me. Daddy Jon Bernal, one of SF's most well respected leathermen, just walked up, gave me a giant bear hug and said welcome to the family Daddy.

A couple of other nearby leatherman and friends of Jon's just looked at him and said, "Daddy?" "You're kidding us right?" Jon and his partner Paul just looked at them and Jon said, she carries herself as a Daddy, I respect her as I would my Daddy, and for that I shall call her Daddy. Paul taught me how to make my first cover, and my first piece of earned leather. Although, he offered me a Master's Cover, I did not feel that I had earned it yet overall, and instead chose to learn how to make a rebel cap instead. I now actually have two rebel caps, one in black and one in red waiting to be finished.

And although I do not yet know Master Fire and Master Archer personally, many of my friends do, and combined with my interactions with them, I must agree that they both earned and hold the honorific well.

_____________________________

Leather Rubbin and Dubbin

Bootblack Blast
Mama's Blast

(in reply to Leatherist)

Post #: 43

RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? - 6/19/2008 4:51:55 PM

BootBlackBlast

Posts: 378
Joined: 10/23/2006
Status: offline

And as far as my Top is concerned, it took me a good long while to find something appropriate to call her, the usual honorifics for one reason or another didn't fit. She has a Daddy of her own and doesn't really identify as such, so that wouldn't work. She's more a Queen or a Princess, but those don't work in public and just made me laugh, Mistress, and Madame were way too formal, Master didn't fit either. So we just ended up using her unique scene name for me to call her. I can use it in public as it is an actual word in a foreign language, and she is accustomed already to answering to it.

Most often she refers to me as Blast, and in rare occasions boi. Every now and again when I'm in trouble or we're in odd social situations she's been forced to call me Jessica, and that was super fricking weird.

_____________________________

Leather Rubbin and Dubbin

Bootblack Blast
Mama's Blast

(in reply to BootBlackBlast)

Post #: 44

RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? - 6/19/2008 5:21:42 PM

SirJohnMandevill

Posts: 546
Joined: 11/10/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: FRSguy

When it comes to me personaly I use it on hear in order to describe my roll within a dynamic.

Same here. I call myself a "Dominant" because it's what I am in my D/s relationship. I'm not a "Master" of anything, except perhaps spin and bullsh*t!

(Not to be confused with the Mickey Mouse Club serial "Spin and Marty....")

The "Sir" in my CM ID is there because "Sir John Mandeville" was a real person. Not compensating for anything.

Les (Purveyor of Fine, Handcrafted Kink)

_____________________________

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No more neuroses
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(in reply to FRSguy)

Post #: 45

RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? - 6/19/2008 5:35:29 PM

jlf1961

Posts: 14840
Joined: 6/10/2008
From: Somewhere Texas
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Darkeyes83
For those who bear it in their online monickers, at what point did you feel you had enough experience, or what deciding factor, made you think you were ready to wear the title 'on your sleeve', so to speak?

I never thought to use master or dom in my nick, not that I am not a dominent personality, but because of the simple fact that there are other boards I belong to where I do use master, but it is skill related.

Personally, I always thought it was a choice, some who truly exhibit that type of personality in all aspects, and then some where you are hard pressed to believe it.

I had one sub that called me 'Sarge' all the time, simply because I reminded her of one, another called me sir, still another called me lord (not my choice, trust me) but the later two were simply continueing the way they had been taught and trained.

There are a couple of subs that have taken my spiritual beliefs to find an appropriate title, usually elder, and sense the birth of my grandchildren, grandfather, following my ancestrial traditions.

In the end it is not what you call yourself, but what others see you as.

My nick on this board is simply my initials and year of birth.

_____________________________

Boy, it sure would be nice if we had some grenades, don't you think?

You cannot control who comes into your life, but you can control which airlock you throw them out of.

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(in reply to Darkeyes83)

Post #: 46

RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? - 6/19/2008 5:42:09 PM

leadership527

Posts: 5026
Joined: 6/2/2008
Status: offline

OK, on a less serious note... "I did".

On a more serious note... I believe that you are a dom/master when a real life girl allows you to put a real life collar around her real life neck. Being able to keep it there for more than 2 days is a bonus. Put another way.... "we know em when we see em". I think subs recognize real dominants and vice versa -- IN THE REAL WORLD. What happens with online D/s relationships is... well.. a bit less clear.

On an truly pragmatic level, I could point to terms and definitions ad nauseum and by the definition set I use, my wife is a slave and that makes me a Master. I could go on at length why I happen to like the definition set I use. The only issue is that I'm pretty certain there are as many definitions for those things are there are humans engaged in D/s. So this leads us back to.. "I did".

You'll note in my nic, I avoided such titles and instead chose a concept that I meant something to me.

~not a real dom

(in reply to Darkeyes83)

Post #: 47

RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? - 6/19/2008 7:26:36 PM

InsaenPleasures

Posts: 49
Joined: 4/27/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Archer

I have actually used the term Journeyman Dom before as a self label back a few years, in fact there is an "Academy" called Journeyman 3 Academy that operates out in Utah and California that has a pretty good reputation.

Now that is the first time I have heard of something like that but it sounds pretty good. I think it fits what I was thinking of pretty well.

Logan

(in reply to Archer)

Post #: 48

RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? - 6/20/2008 6:55:30 AM

hejira92

Posts: 2272
Joined: 10/27/2005
From: Palm Beach County, Fl
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: leadership527

On a more serious note... I believe that you are a dom/master when a real life girl allows you to put a real life collar around her real life neck. Being able to keep it there for more than 2 days is a bonus. Put another way.... "we know em when we see em". I think subs recognize real dominants and vice versa -- IN THE REAL WORLD. What happens with online D/s relationships is... well.. a bit less clear.

Master would never call Himself that. He always considered Himself Dominant (and, yes, He sure is that...), but He would never call Himself a "Master".

That is a designation I gave Him. As His ownership and his mind began to reach inside me and take over and control every aspect of my psyche, it was a natural expression for me of His role and rule in my life. He IS my Master.

He would never impose this on another (and certainly not one with whom He was not involved). "Master" is personal, I think. It is not like mister, or even Sir (a legal title, as Les pointed out).

If I were out and about and someone insisted I refer to him as Master so-and-so, I do not think I would be refering, or interacting, with that person at all.

< Message edited by hejira92 -- 6/20/2008 6:56:29 AM >

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(in reply to leadership527)

Post #: 49

RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? - 6/20/2008 7:51:43 AM

RedMagic1

Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: leadership527
my wife is a slave and that makes me a Master.

Actually, in your case it sounds from your posts as though your wife has been doing an excellent job at moving you past your previous hard limits. I am very happy for you both because of the added happiness you have found as a result. (And here you thought breaking hard limits was a "no brainer"....

)

The terminology problem arises when people think that human beings are only one thing. BootBlackBlast's posts are an excellent example of how a Daddy/Master/rebel/boi can all be rolled up into one single individual. Real relationships in real life are a product of negotiation, which is a process of mutual submission to build something bigger than either person could on their own.

"Master" and "Sir" have a bad rep because most people who walk around with that title believe it means "my way or the highway," and have no idea how to construct meaningful human relationships. By contrast, people granted such titles by others are much more likely to understand that responsibility is more important than authority, and self-control is more important than power over others.

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to leadership527)

Post #: 50

RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? - 6/21/2008 3:53:06 AM

LordODiscipline

Posts: 995
Joined: 6/28/2004
Status: offline

LOL....

Who declared you the arbiter of who is whatever?

The fact is: people declare themselves "whatever" and sometimes we may agree - sometimes not... but, we are not in a position to judge them when it is not stated as a lie - but, stated as a pseudo-titular type of moniker of self identification

Stating "I am master XXX" does not demean anyone (but potentially themself in a weird way). Why sweat it?

And, isn't this web site set up to attract people who are looking for others?

What makes such a search "trolling" as compared to "seeking" except personal prejudice?

~J

_____________________________

"Anyone who thinks they're important is usually just a pompous moron who can't deal with his or her own pathetic insignificance and the fact that what they do is meaningless and inconsequential."
William Thomas

(in reply to Darkeyes83)

Post #: 51

RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? - 6/21/2008 5:06:20 AM

Darkeyes83

Posts: 18
Joined: 7/4/2007
Status: offline

Like I stated very clearly(or atleast I thought so). I meant no disrespect to people that do or don't have it in their name, I simply asked because I was curious, I'm rather new to the community, and I don't kow the undercurrents or the community related etiquittes(outside of those I've learned in the past, and the general rule that respect is first and foremost). I ask out of curiosity, not maleous. There's no ill intent behind my delving into a subject that I've seen discussed in chatrooms from this site and others. I simply ask questions in order to try to get a better understanding and appreciation for how things work here.

Heck, just from making this virginal posting, I've already learned a little about who is more respected and acknowledged here. The community elders and role models if you will. If I continue to post on these forums, you'll probably see a pattern that 1. I can be very analytical in nature. And that social interactions are one of my biggest curiosities(unlike numbers, you can't just run a formula and have a definitive answer), and 2. I have a very bad sense of humor that I use regularly. What else might be said about me, only time will tell.

(in reply to LordODiscipline)

Post #: 52

RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? - 6/21/2008 5:34:45 AM

pinkieplum

Posts: 84
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Darkeyes83

I do not mean this in any disrespect, but in the year or so that I have been on this website, trolling, shadowing, and using the chatrooms(atleast until the anti-virus software on my new computer put an end to my ability to load the java applet) I have noticed many people have the title of Master or Dom in their nicks. Many times it suits, sometimes it does not.

For those who bear it in their online monickers, at what point did you feel you had enough experience, or what deciding factor, made you think you were ready to wear the title 'on your sleeve', so to speak?

Again, this is not meant as a disrespectful post or condemnation, it is an inquiry because I am of a curious nature, especially when it comes to social interactions and traditions.

To me, nicks are very evocative. i am somewhat repelled by the 'LordoftheUniverse' style of nick, and somewhat attracted to the 'Jaxman' style of nick.

But i'm never so cavalier as to make assumptions about any Man based soley on the nick He chose.

i have one Dom Friend who chose His nick, unfortunately, when He was rather drunky. He misspelled the word and S/some P/pl might assume He's a bit dim because of it...but in fact He's one of the brightest P/pl i know.

pinkieplum

(in reply to Darkeyes83)

Post #: 53

RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? - 6/21/2008 6:44:39 AM

LordODiscipline

Posts: 995
Joined: 6/28/2004
Status: offline

Look -

As a community youngster (calling someone an 'elder' is an exceptional misnomer where age and/or time on a board is irrelevant to relevancy and/otr time involved in WIITWD) one thing I have learned in 13 years (I am much older - but, started learning very late in life - my mother said I was "special") is that when someone says at the beginning of a conversation "I mean no disrespect..." there is disrespect coming our way.

I understand you may not "mean anything" - but, you said loads.

Sincerely - There is way too much import placed on self definition and whether or not people take one seriously...

As a subculture, we are a morbid and maudlin crew that takes it self way too seriously for anyone outside to take us seriously.

The fact is - how others see an individual is not as important as how they perceive themselves.

But, self import/worth/definition is often based on other's perceptions...

And - after all... you are actually talking about "on line monikers" - email tags - etc.... they can be serious, humorous, puffy or simply trite.

There is no rational means of interpreting such at all - and, people apply their personal prejudices (good and bad) to them as they read/interpret them.

Mine (as one instance) is derived from a formerly popular book and what was available and my attempt at wry humor (based on a perception of some puffy characters I knew) sometime way way back. Those who actually know me understand it has no relevant meaning to my personal vested worth and/or anything akin to derivation of status.

It is a moniker.

Other people (as you suggest) will take this to the extreme of denotation of status (personal and socially requisite - in their minds).

But, it does not really matter at all.

Because when they lay down at night and turn of their computer they are still the same schlub as when they woke up in the morning... And, when they wake up tomorrow - guess what? - they will still be the same burger flipping McDonald's employee as they were yesterday... and, I know this because I will see them at the deep fry as I lower the basket for the next round of orders.

And - perceived respect from single postings is definitively something which you will have to get over.

See what is said -not how it is said...

Some of the most respectful (note - not 'respected' - but 'respectful') people on any board are the ones you may want to avoid.

But, live and learn (but, have fun doing it)

~J (who is off to polish his cyber scepter!!)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Darkeyes83
Like I stated very clearly(or atleast I thought so). I meant no disrespect to people that do or don't have it in their name, I simply asked because I was curious, I'm rather new to the community, and I don't kow the undercurrents or the community related etiquittes(outside of those I've learned in the past, and the general rule that respect is first and foremost). I ask out of curiosity, not maleous. There's no ill intent behind my delving into a subject that I've seen discussed in chatrooms from this site and others. I simply ask questions in order to try to get a better understanding and appreciation for how things work here.
Heck, just from making this virginal posting, I've already learned a little about who is more respected and acknowledged here. The community elders and role models if you will. If I continue to post on these forums, you'll probably see a pattern that 1. I can be very analytical in nature. And that social interactions are one of my biggest curiosities(unlike numbers, you can't just run a formula and have a definitive answer), and 2. I have a very bad sense of humor that I use regularly. What else might be said about me, only time will tell.

_____________________________

"Anyone who thinks they're important is usually just a pompous moron who can't deal with his or her own pathetic insignificance and the fact that what they do is meaningless and inconsequential."
William Thomas

(in reply to Darkeyes83)

Post #: 54

RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? - 6/21/2008 8:48:38 AM

Darkeyes83

Posts: 18
Joined: 7/4/2007
Status: offline

Well, that was a mouthful with a side of fries.

Good points, all of them. When it comes down to it, I think you're right in that it doesn't really matter. The whole thing was spawned from someone attempting to harass a friend of mine, which sparked old curiosities.

You may think me the dubious and judgemental type, heck you may be right, but that's not what I see when I look in the mirror.

(in reply to LordODiscipline)

Post #: 55

RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? - 6/21/2008 9:04:36 AM

Leatherist

Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
Status: offline

One of the issues that practical people have with many who choose titles like master is this.

The track record of many of this sort over time has proven that this attitude is often taken by dysfunctional, misogynistic men who have failed miserably at vanilla relationships. So they take this route to try to have everything thier way-much like the spoiled child who has had it's hand slapped by mommy in the cookie jar once too often.

They tend to be very thin skinned and humorless-and make a big deal about thier self chosen titles-because they are insecure, and it's really all they have going for them. They compound this failing by insisting on even more unweildy protocols and wierd structure-preffering this to actually having to understand and relate to another human being.

Which, paradoxically, they also fail to see as lazy.

In short, these are the last people any sane human being really wants to submit to-and they do catch flack over it-And it is criticism well deserved. Which only serves to make them even more insecure and bitter.

_____________________________

My shop is currently segueing into production mode.

I'm not taking custom orders.

(in reply to Darkeyes83)

Post #: 56

RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? - 6/21/2008 9:09:47 AM

NorthernGent

Posts: 8730
Joined: 7/10/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Darkeyes83

at what point did you feel you had enough experience, or what deciding factor, made you think you were ready to wear the title 'on your sleeve', so to speak?

I simply woke up one morning, got out of bed, casually strolled over to open my bedroom window and announced to the world and myself, with my arms in the air: I AM THE MASTER. That was more than enough for me.

_____________________________

I have the courage to be a coward - but not beyond my limits.

Sooner or later, the man who wins is the man who thinks he can.

(in reply to Darkeyes83)

Post #: 57

RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? - 6/21/2008 9:16:37 AM

LordODiscipline

Posts: 995
Joined: 6/28/2004
Status: offline

I tried for this -

But, the window jammed.

Although, to be fair to myself - the dog was very attentive, and I believe convinced by the declaration!!

~J

quote:

ORIGINAL: NorthernGent

quote:

ORIGINAL: Darkeyes83

at what point did you feel you had enough experience, or what deciding factor, made you think you were ready to wear the title 'on your sleeve', so to speak?

I simply woke up one morning, got out of bed, casually strolled over to open my bedroom window and announced to the world and myself, with my arms in the air: I AM THE MASTER. That was more than enough for me.

_____________________________

"Anyone who thinks they're important is usually just a pompous moron who can't deal with his or her own pathetic insignificance and the fact that what they do is meaningless and inconsequential."
William Thomas

(in reply to NorthernGent)

Post #: 58

RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? - 6/21/2008 9:50:25 AM

NorthernGent

Posts: 8730
Joined: 7/10/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LordODiscipline

I tried for this -

But, the window jammed.

You missed a trick there.......you could have smashed the window with your fist, stuck your head through the gap and announced...........'think I'll try it, when the street is awash with activity; maybe have Eye of the Tiger blaring out......

quote:

ORIGINAL: LordODiscipline

Although, to be fair to myself - the dog was very attentive, and I believe convinced by the declaration!!

~J

You can't please all of the people (and dogs) all of the time....

_____________________________

I have the courage to be a coward - but not beyond my limits.

Sooner or later, the man who wins is the man who thinks he can.

(in reply to LordODiscipline)

Post #: 59

RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? - 6/21/2008 10:01:40 AM

LadyHibiscus

Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: NorthernGent

I simply woke up one morning, got out of bed, casually strolled over to open my bedroom window and announced to the world and myself, with my arms in the air: I AM THE MASTER. That was more than enough for me.

This reminds me too much of a scene from "Life of Brian"..... did your audience approve?

_____________________________

[page 23 girl]

(in reply to NorthernGent)

Post #: 60

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