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tsatske -> RE: Please, tell me I'm not crazy for not believing her. (6/23/2008 6:06:44 AM)
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quote:
For those who would say just let it go and ignore it, I have to say that if *I* were your dom (which I never would be, but just go with it) and you allowed me to make this sort of mistake over and over, and you were losing respect for me because of it, and my credit score was getting ready to go down the toilet because of it, I would be very upset that you could tell something was wrong, and you didn't attempt to help me see what was going on.
Christina,
It's possible that we just read the OP differently. I did not in the least have the idea that she had not shared her insights with her Master; my impression was that she had told him enough so that clearly he knew her feelings on it. If that is not the case, i would agree with you; though it needs to be spoken with respect and tact, i do think that a Master is owed my insight and knowledge anytime i have something to contribute. Once it is offered, though, it is really none of my buisness what he does with it.
To those that say that she has every right to refuse friendship with the young woman (the con artist), you may be right. I do not know their dynamic or agreement, so i can not say. I know that I do not feel that way, however. I feel a responsiblity to welcome friends of Masters, and to treat any woman that he brings into our lives (at any level, including friendship) with love and respect, and welcome them with open arms. My friendships are occasionally overshadowed by trying to think what carries His representation best. For instance, we had to have several talks about my dear part time sister, because i felt guilty that i was not treating her as i would treat a friend - imo, friends tell each other the truth and share their insights, even if the friend may not like what they hear. But because i felt that she saw us more as a 'couple' then as seperates, i did not want to say things to her that she might hear as harsh, even if it was what i would have said to a friend. Master told me repeatedly to not censor myself with her in that way, and i have made strides in doing so - although there are still limits. In anything that Master gives her advice on, i do not feel comfortable offering conflicting advice, for instance, even though the difference is probably the difference between a man and a woman's perspective.
My last Master and i are still dear friends. When we split up, i had a sisterslave, who He eventually married. I think she is a dear and i know that she is very good to and for him, so i have absolutely no issues with her. She obviously felt some insecurity around me, though, for a long time, and showed it. He caught her being nasty to me, and appologized, and i brushed him off and said, 'it's okay, i understand', to which he said, 'no, it is not okay. she and I have the kind of relationship where i can certainly demand she at least be civil to anyone i care about.' I happen to agree with him.
I would cultivate the con artists friendship and try to behave as i thought my Master wanted. I would also welcome and encourage discussions with him about her, mostly listening - with someone to vent to, he may work it out on his own. I would share with him anything she said or did that might shed light on her true self, but without expectations or ulterior motives. In short, I would trust my Master to come to the right conclusion, on His own, and trust the decisions He made.
If you can not trust him, you have to question how much power you feel comfortable turning over to him - and really, is THIS worth bringing that kind of questioning into your relationship? is SHE worth it?
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