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-=Blind Submission=- - 6/22/2008 8:54:05 PM

ResidentSadist

Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline

-=Blind Submission=-
(sub frenzy, rapture… etc)

Being submissive is a personality trait and not the same as being a submissive which is a relationship role. From the “submission is a gift” crowd to the “I bow to all” gang, I see many posts on these forums that lack common sense. Submission is no more a gift than love is. They are both required parts of a healthy power exchange relationship.

Sub frenzy is equally unbalanced because the blind submission of the meek is rarely treasured for long by either those that give or receive it. However, the surrender of someone balanced and strong enough to be your equal is enduring.

Just saying…

(part of random BDSM philosophy for the masses)

_____________________________

-=BDSM Book List=- Reading is Fundamental !!!
I give good thread.

Post #: 1

RE: -=Blind Submission=- - 6/22/2008 8:57:27 PM

Quivver

Posts: 1953
Joined: 11/27/2004
Status: offline

Exactly why I said in the mentioned thread that I'm a selfish bitch, submission is a gift I give to Me.....

_____________________________

The problem with communication ... is the illusion that it has been accomplished. ~George Bernard Shaw

(in reply to ResidentSadist)

Post #: 2

RE: -=Blind Submission=- - 6/22/2008 8:58:53 PM

goodpet

Posts: 458
Joined: 6/8/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist
......
However, the surrender of someone balanced and strong enough to be your equal is enduring.
....st saying…

Well said. Too bad it is not well understood by the masses.

~ann

(in reply to ResidentSadist)

Post #: 3

RE: -=Blind Submission=- - 6/22/2008 8:59:52 PM

ResidentSadist

Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Quivver
Exactly why I said in the mentioned thread that I'm a selfish bitch, submission is a gift I give to Me.....

Many people will not understand that it is its own reward. Well put.

< Message edited by ResidentSadist -- 6/22/2008 9:00:05 PM >

_____________________________

-=BDSM Book List=- Reading is Fundamental !!!
I give good thread.

(in reply to Quivver)

Post #: 4

RE: -=Blind Submission=- - 6/23/2008 6:29:40 AM

VioletAshes

Posts: 101
Joined: 1/16/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist

the surrender of someone balanced and strong enough to be your equal is enduring.

Though it may sound bizarre to some I believe that equality is the heart of any D/s relationship. If you are not equals, it simply will not work long term.

_____________________________

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"I'm not like other girls that you know
but I believe I'm worth coming home to"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(in reply to ResidentSadist)

Post #: 5

RE: -=Blind Submission=- - 6/23/2008 8:03:56 AM

chiaThePet

Posts: 2694
Joined: 2/4/2007
Status: offline

Ok, let's try this again, I think we can do better Helen.

Ready, go.

Left, left, left, warmer, warmer, STOP! <CRASH>

It's ok Helen, we'll clean it up later.

Maybe if you didn't flail your arms so much sweetie.

"Paging Miss Keller, paging Miss Keller, please pick up the white courtesy phone."

Alright, let me quide you dear.

To the right, no, the right Helen, your getting colder.

Better, warmer, warmer, easy does it, stop, stop, STOP! <CRASH>

It's ok, nothing a couple of stitches won't take care of.

Alright, from the beginning, left, right, right, warmer, warmer..........

chia* (the pet)

_____________________________

Love is a many splendid sting.

You can stick me in the corner, but I'll probably just end up coloring on the walls.

(in reply to ResidentSadist)

Post #: 6

RE: -=Blind Submission=- - 6/23/2008 8:44:49 AM

sweetnurseBBW

Posts: 2464
Joined: 1/26/2006
From: North Carolina
Status: offline

If my submission was a gift then I would not expect anything in return. I do expect him to do what was negotiated upon. As a slave my needs are met when his are. I do have needs and wants just as he does. I want my needs met just as much as he does his. It is more of a symbiotic thing instead of a gift. I never could relate to the gift theory.

_____________________________

Sir Pain's pain slut

(in reply to ResidentSadist)

Post #: 7

RE: -=Blind Submission=- - 6/23/2008 9:00:26 AM

gypsygrl

Posts: 1471
Joined: 10/8/2005
From: new york state
Status: offline

quote:

Though it may sound bizarre to some I believe that equality is the heart of any D/s relationship. If you are not equals, it simply will not work long term.

Not bizarre at all!!!

_____________________________

“To be happy is to be able to become aware of oneself without fright.” ~Walter Benjamin

(in reply to VioletAshes)

Post #: 8

RE: -=Blind Submission=- - 6/23/2008 9:06:35 AM

RCdc

Posts: 8674
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: VioletAshes
Though it may sound bizarre to some I believe that equality is the heart of any D/s relationship. If you are not equals, it simply will not work long term.

Doesn't sound bizarro, but I don't agree at all. I am not identical in any way at all to anyone else. We have our own strengths and differences which compliment each other and create balance. Our unequality creates equality.

the.dark.

< Message edited by Darcyandthedark -- 6/23/2008 9:07:05 AM >

_____________________________

RC&dc

love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

(in reply to VioletAshes)

Post #: 9

RE: -=Blind Submission=- - 6/23/2008 9:16:14 AM

gypsygrl

Posts: 1471
Joined: 10/8/2005
From: new york state
Status: offline

In my mind, equal doesn't mean the same. Right now, I'm thinking of two different substances on either side of a balance that have the same mass. The substances themselves might differ in every respect, but they still balance each other.

The point at which I'm unable to provide a counterweight to a d-factor is the point at which I cease to submit and am simply overpowered. I've been in this situation on a couple of occasions and its dangerous for both sides of the slash. (Conversely, if the d-factor can't counterbalance me, I end up flipping the top.)

< Message edited by gypsygrl -- 6/23/2008 9:18:26 AM >

_____________________________

“To be happy is to be able to become aware of oneself without fright.” ~Walter Benjamin

(in reply to RCdc)

Post #: 10

RE: -=Blind Submission=- - 6/23/2008 9:29:52 AM

RCdc

Posts: 8674
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: gypsygrl

In my mind, equal doesn't mean the same. Right now, I'm thinking of two different substances on either side of a balance that have the same mass. The substances themselves might differ in every respect, but they still balance each other.

The point at which I'm unable to provide a counterweight to a d-factor is the point at which I cease to submit and am simply overpowered. I've been in this situation on a couple of occasions and its dangerous for both sides of the slash. (Conversely, if the d-factor can't counterbalance me, I end up flipping the top.)

For us, equality comes from balance, so that is probably simply a difference in the understanding of equality. It does depend if you see the word as a noun or an adjective. I am speaking from the perspective of a adjective. I am not equal to Darcy at all. I have differences that compliment his but I am not his equal because we are not the same. We have qualities that enhance or meet each others but we are unique in ourselves. Unequally equal.
As a human(noun), yes we are equal - but that is where equality for me ends.

the.dark.

_____________________________

RC&dc

love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

(in reply to gypsygrl)

Post #: 11

RE: -=Blind Submission=- - 6/23/2008 2:24:19 PM

silkncarol

Posts: 318
Status: offline

I agree ResidentSadist.....my personality is submissive and i don't think of myself as giving a gift...it is who i am and what brings me joy....but....i'm strong and independent and know my own value. I think many submissives don't understand the power they must have to enter into an exchange.....you have to have something to give on both sides.

_____________________________

We attract hearts by the qualities we display. We retain them by the qualities we possess.

Shoes can change your life................. Cinderella

(in reply to ResidentSadist)

Post #: 12

RE: -=Blind Submission=- - 6/23/2008 2:51:51 PM

Daes

Posts: 246
Joined: 4/20/2007
From: Diamond Bar, SoCal
Status: offline

When I describe submission i tend to describe it is "Giving myself" which is more accurate than describing it as a "gift".

That said, submission, like love and trust, should Never be given blindly. These things are to be valued, not taken for granted. They are to be given to those that are worthy of keeping them.

Trust begets love just as it does submission. To give it to a stranger is one's own folly.

_____________________________

~*Estrellita*~
I want to be in surrender of His strength, of His power. Alone, I am nothing, but in His arms I am all things...

~His puppy~

(in reply to silkncarol)

Post #: 13

RE: -=Blind Submission=- - 6/23/2008 5:46:07 PM

GreedyTop

Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline

whenever I see 'submission is a gift'.... I always wonder if it's a toaster, blender, or matched set of towels.

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polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to Daes)

Post #: 14

RE: -=Blind Submission=- - 6/23/2008 5:51:26 PM

AquaticSub

Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline

Regardless of one's position on the term "gift" (hey, if people can use poetic terms such as "slave belly/heart" and "natural X", I can view love, submission, dominance, and my friends through poetic terms as gifts and blessings in my life), we're not a fan of blind submission. We're not much of a fan of blind anything really, be the devotation to a political party, a spouse, country or a religion.

< Message edited by AquaticSub -- 6/23/2008 5:52:55 PM >

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to ResidentSadist)

Post #: 15

RE: -=Blind Submission=- - 6/23/2008 5:52:29 PM

AquaticSub

Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

whenever I see 'submission is a gift'.... I always wonder if it's a toaster, blender, or matched set of towels.

Well, my submission does match his dominance very well. And the carpet. That one is so important...

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to GreedyTop)

Post #: 16

RE: -=Blind Submission=- - 6/23/2008 5:53:40 PM

GreedyTop

Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline

*smoooches* AS :)

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to AquaticSub)

Post #: 17

RE: -=Blind Submission=- - 6/23/2008 6:04:51 PM

WinsomeDefiance

Posts: 6719
Joined: 8/7/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

*smoooches* AS :)

For some reason, I read this as Smooches Ass......

(in reply to GreedyTop)

Post #: 18

RE: -=Blind Submission=- - 6/23/2008 6:05:31 PM

AquaticSub

Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: WinsomeDefiance

quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

*smoooches* AS :)

For some reason, I read this as Smooches Ass......

Well I prefer smooches on the lips but whatever floats yer boat.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to WinsomeDefiance)

Post #: 19

RE: -=Blind Submission=- - 6/23/2008 6:09:43 PM

slaveluci

Posts: 4294
Joined: 3/2/2007
From: Little Rock, AR
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist
Submission is no more a gift than love is. They are both required parts of a healthy power exchange relationship

I'm surprised no one has refuted this statement yet. I've read here from alot of folks how love is not required at all in any lifestyle dynamic.

quote:

Sub frenzy is equally unbalanced because the blind submission of the meek is rarely treasured for long by either those that give or receive it. However, the surrender of someone balanced and strong enough to be your equal is enduring.

I agree with this wholeheartedly. "Sub frenzy" to me is nonsense and nothing but a flimsy excuse to act totally stupid and without restraint and yet not be "to blame" for ones' actions. I don't believe it exists...........luci

_____________________________

To choose a good book, look in an inquisitor’s prohibited list. ~John Aikin

(in reply to ResidentSadist)

Post #: 20

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