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Giving up - 11/6/2005 3:43:14 PM

MrADude2004

Posts: 10
Joined: 7/18/2004
From: Indiana
Status: offline

Been on this site for three years. Haven't met one person who's really interested in taking BDSM to real life. You've all soured my enthusiasm for this and I have no interest in the lifestyle anymore, so thanks.

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RE: Giving up - 11/6/2005 3:45:33 PM

fyreredsub

Posts: 3403
Joined: 10/7/2005
Status: offline

Sir,

fogive my brutal honesty.........

but perhaps you should have posted long ago.
it's amazing the people you meet and friendships that get started by others learning how you think and feel about things.

_____________________________

"Accordingly, men must then either fulfill their nature, or deny it, and in denying their nature, deny us ours, for ours is the complement to theirs. " Renegades

(in reply to MrADude2004)

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RE: Giving up - 11/6/2005 4:13:04 PM

IronBear

Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MrADude2004

Been on this site for three years. Haven't met one person who's really interested in taking BDSM to real life. You've all soured my enthusiasm for this and I have no interest in the lifestyle anymore, so thanks.

Sounds like a cop-out to me by some one who isn't ready to accept responsibility for his actions.

_____________________________

Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

(in reply to MrADude2004)

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RE: Giving up - 11/6/2005 4:13:16 PM

FTopinMichigan

Posts: 571
Joined: 7/5/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MrADude2004

Been on this site for three years. Haven't met one person who's really interested in taking BDSM to real life. You've all soured my enthusiasm for this and I have no interest in the lifestyle anymore, so thanks.

My guess would be that the people probably have picked up on your wonderful attitude.

Blaming "everyone" here, for your inability to meet someone is a bit over the top, dontcha think?

Taking responsiblity for your own actions is an important facet to any person, let alone for a Dom. I would look inward to find out what can be improved, whether it be the approach toward others, or knowledge (or lack thereof) on the subject matter.

Don't expect miracles from an online site. This is just a conduit to meet others that might share a like interest...it's not the end all solution.
K

(in reply to MrADude2004)

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RE: Giving up - 11/6/2005 4:16:55 PM

darkinshadows

Posts: 4145
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: UK
Status: offline

Three years? Yet your profile echoes of only just over one...unless it is your decison to change profiles regularly. But this in itself speaks of a doubt...

Giving up is not an atractive quality. How should a submissive or slave feel seeing that a Dominant 'gives up' so easily?
If one is disheartened so easily, it leaves little to be drawn towards. If one desires to interact, then one should stand forward and take the mike...

quote:

Listen to the reed and the tale it tells,
how it sings of separation:
Ever since they cut me from the reed bed,
my wail has caused men and women to weep.
I want a heart torn open with longing
to share the pain of this love.
Whoever has been parted from his source
longs to return to that state of union.
At every gathering I play my lament.
I'm a friend to both happy and sad.
Each befriended me for his own reasons,
yet none searched out the secrets I contain.

Rumi

_____________________________

.dark.

...i surrender to gravity and the unknown...

(in reply to MrADude2004)

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RE: Giving up - 11/6/2005 4:21:40 PM

bladerunner5

Posts: 30
Joined: 9/2/2005
Status: offline

Not to mention that at least once that I observed, people in the main chatroom were giving you good advice left and right. For both online searches and for finding people in real life. As I recall, the more advice people gave, the more whining you did about how hAAARd it is to find the right person.

Maybe it's time to take a new self-inventory of what *you* have to offer a potential partner, and how much effort you're willing to put into finding that partner. And *then* figure out what it is you want from that potential partner.

Bladerunner
who absolutely doesn't fit the bill for most people
but then it only takes one - or a few

(in reply to MrADude2004)

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RE: Giving up - 11/6/2005 4:23:52 PM

swtnsparkling

Posts: 1738
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

I've met a few - we've become friends -had lunch- but i am not here looking to meet any one real time for any BDSM relationship as i am already Happily Occupied (smile)

all good things come to one who is patient ( wait that is for subbies lol)
all good things come to those who wait?

Stop being so negitive, there is some one out there for everyone.
but if you give up then you will never know.

_____________________________

Never make anyone a priority who treats you as an option 2003

Walk in Peace

A "No" uttered from deepest conviction is better than a "Yes" uttered merely to please

(in reply to MrADude2004)

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RE: Giving up - 11/6/2005 4:31:18 PM

rubberservitude

Posts: 7
Joined: 10/29/2005
Status: offline

I have to agree with the first poster.

Seems like one big man hating club to me.

(in reply to MrADude2004)

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RE: Giving up - 11/6/2005 4:33:53 PM

mnottertail

Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline

Mr. A Post in three years, you are welcome.

Ron

hit-and-run is against the law in all states.

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30

(in reply to MrADude2004)

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RE: Giving up - 11/6/2005 4:37:05 PM

smilezz

Posts: 2156
Joined: 6/18/2004
Status: offline

quote:

You've all soured my enthusiasm for this and I have no interest in the lifestyle anymore, so thanks.

WOW! I didn't know i had that much power. KEWL! >smirks<

Stop feeling sorry for yourself and go find what you seek.

~smilezz~

_____________________________

=It's not my fault that when I was a baby I was dropped in a box of Glitter & I have been shinin' ever since=

�*:-.,_,.-:* � �*:-.,_,.-:* � �*:-.,_,.-:* � �*:-.,_,-:* �

(in reply to MrADude2004)

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RE: Giving up - 11/6/2005 4:37:12 PM

LadiesBladewing

Posts: 944
Joined: 8/31/2005
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You get what you give in this life. We've had -no- problem, in the few months that we've been members here, of finding MANY people with whom we can talk, and even an OUTSTANDING girl, willing to work hard to meet our expectations in service.

Though I'm sure it won't do much for your ego or your pity-pot, if contrary evidence shows that it isn't the place...there is a good chance that it's the participant.

I wish you better luck and an improved state of mind in the future.

Lady Zephyr

quote:

ORIGINAL: MrADude2004

Been on this site for three years. Haven't met one person who's really interested in taking BDSM to real life. You've all soured my enthusiasm for this and I have no interest in the lifestyle anymore, so thanks.

(in reply to MrADude2004)

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Post #: 11

RE: Giving up - 11/6/2005 4:40:31 PM

girl4you2

Posts: 1622
Joined: 8/4/2005
Status: offline

Breath Control
Corset Training
Electrical Play
Fire Play
Knife Play
Cages
Medical Exams
Needle Play
Objectification
Ponygirl Training
Suspension
Verbal Humiliation

for someone new, those are pretty lofty special skills.

i've not found people on this site to be hateful of anyone, any gender, or anything. perhaps it's just a bad day and you're seeing things a bit off?

_____________________________

maireann croí éadrom i bhfad. is maith an scáthán súil charad. is leor nod don eolach.
got shoes?

(in reply to MrADude2004)

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RE: Giving up - 11/6/2005 4:41:06 PM

darkinshadows

Posts: 4145
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: UK
Status: offline

I have not seen such actions. But then, I am female!
You have only been on the site a short time rubberservitude - give it time. When I first joined, it was nonstop negativity. When people see your new, it draws out the trolls... keep strong and positive and don't allow them to draw you down in to non positive thinking... especially when your photograph is as fabulous as you have!

Peace and Rapture

_____________________________

.dark.

...i surrender to gravity and the unknown...

(in reply to rubberservitude)

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RE: Giving up - 11/6/2005 4:42:54 PM

girl4you2

Posts: 1622
Joined: 8/4/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: rubberservitude

I have to agree with the first poster.

Seems like one big man hating club to me.

again, i've not seen people on these boards show hatred towards anyone, no matter their gender or sexual preferences. dislike about politicians, perhaps....try pulling up a chair and reading and posting for a while; it just might show you another side from your email box. be well.

< Message edited by girl4you2 -- 11/6/2005 4:45:15 PM >

_____________________________

maireann croí éadrom i bhfad. is maith an scáthán súil charad. is leor nod don eolach.
got shoes?

(in reply to rubberservitude)

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RE: Giving up - 11/6/2005 4:46:29 PM

rubberservitude

Posts: 7
Joined: 10/29/2005
Status: offline

Oh really?

Then how come every other profile starts like this.....?

NO MEN.

NO LOSERS AND WANNA-BES

MEN ARE ONLY AFTER SEX and MEN are "this " and MEN are "that"?

It really doesnt matter what you write in your introductory letter because
the female dominant is going to decide in about 2 seconds if she thinks
she can get what she wants out of you. Thats just the way it is.

Most of the time its ignored anyway.

< Message edited by rubberservitude -- 11/6/2005 4:47:14 PM >

(in reply to darkinshadows)

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RE: Giving up - 11/6/2005 4:52:22 PM

MsIncognito

Posts: 742
Joined: 5/24/2005
Status: offline

You're welcome. Don't hurt your behind on the way out.

Seriously, what else is there to say?

(in reply to MrADude2004)

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RE: Giving up - 11/6/2005 4:54:48 PM

DesertRat

Posts: 2774
Joined: 11/29/2004
From: NM/USA
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MrADude2004

Been on this site for three years. Haven't met one person who's really interested in taking BDSM to real life. You've all soured my enthusiasm for this and I have no interest in the lifestyle anymore, so thanks.

I suggest you make more of an effort and try some different approaches before giving up. If you really have the desire, you need to show it in positive ways. This isn't one of those deals where you just hang up a shingle and wait for customers.

On the other hand, walking away from it for awhile could help you gain some balance and perspective. Maybe you'll find it wasn't really what you wanted after all. Or maybe you'll find yourself feeling that you really do want it, and are willing to work the problem to its proper solution.

Anyway, when you're in a less pissy mood, you'll probably see that we ALL are not responsible for souring your enthusiasm. Truth be told, you're the only one who can do that. Cut yourself some slack.

Bob

(in reply to MrADude2004)

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RE: Giving up - 11/6/2005 4:55:27 PM

darkinshadows

Posts: 4145
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: UK
Status: offline

Well, I havent seen anything like that. The one item I have seen is the 'no-men'... but that is a minority.
Like I said before, give it time. Its hard to feel discouraged but patience is a wonderful thing to have or learn and it also aids with ones submission and its a great plus to have. Maybe try the forums and keep your eye out and your hand in with views like this.

Peace and Rapture

_____________________________

.dark.

...i surrender to gravity and the unknown...

(in reply to rubberservitude)

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RE: Giving up - 11/6/2005 5:00:45 PM

girl4you2

Posts: 1622
Joined: 8/4/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: rubberservitude

Oh really?

Then how come every other profile starts like this.....?

NO MEN.

NO LOSERS AND WANNA-BES

MEN ARE ONLY AFTER SEX and MEN are "this " and MEN are "that"?

It really doesnt matter what you write in your introductory letter because
the female dominant is going to decide in about 2 seconds if she thinks
she can get what she wants out of you. Thats just the way it is.

Most of the time its ignored anyway.

my. i've not read too many profiles, but of the ones that i have, none have had those things in them. you did hit on a very important point, however, in that introductory email point. that is what speaks first about you, and what you are trying to say. i don't think i've ever looked at a profile before i've read the email. if it's a one liner or it's full of errors and sounds like it was writter at a less than optimum time, i won't be too favorably impressed. a thoughtful, resepecful, kind email will get my attention. no matter what label we or others give ourselves, we appreciate being treated with respect.

maybe it's time to reflect a bit on how you present yourself, in what you are looking for, and thinking positively. i wish you well.

_____________________________

maireann croí éadrom i bhfad. is maith an scáthán súil charad. is leor nod don eolach.
got shoes?

(in reply to rubberservitude)

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RE: Giving up - 11/6/2005 5:02:44 PM

LadiesBladewing

Posts: 944
Joined: 8/31/2005
Status: offline

You may want to consider doing some looking closer to home, as well as being on here. I know that we aren't the only ones who don't do long-distance, and aren't looking to "relocate" someone. You might find that there is someone around your area that is right up your alley.

Lady Zephyr

(in reply to rubberservitude)

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