Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

RE: Ritualistic Style


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Master >> RE: Ritualistic Style Page: <<   < prev  1 2 [3]
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RE: Ritualistic Style - 11/9/2005 3:37:17 PM   
Padriag


Posts: 2633
Joined: 3/30/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: IronBear


quote:

ORIGINAL: MalevolentLyset

He blocks his cell number every single time he calls.


I can never quite get my head around the reference to cell phones. probably so used to refering to them as mobile phones. When I read the quote I had visions of him blocking the number of his jail cell...... ~RWL~

LOL... from what I read about his life you may not be far off... this guy has some serious issues.

Let's recap... he's ruled by his mommy.
He lives in a gated apartment with rotating security codes.
He hides his personal life from everyone in the world.
He doesn't want to be seen with a pretty girl in public.

This guy may not be in a jail cell... but he's living in a prison of fear. He is not dominant. He's a scared man who wants to control someone as a way of controlling a tiny part of his world. He's also got a LOT to learn about psychology. He's incredibly selfish, concerned with himself only. He can't even accept responsibility for ending the relationship... he tries to shift the blame onto Lyset as much as possible. Its all her fault because she has needs too and he didn't bother to get to know her well enough to realize that. He's not at all assertive from the conversation I read here, constantly looking to Lyset's reactions before he does anything... very passive aggressive.

Lyset, you've already gotten some great advice and there's not anything I can do to add to that except say listen to LA... LA knows what she is talking about. So does IronBear, they're good people. You can do better, give yourself some time and don't hurry. Chalk this up to a learning experience and let it go at that. There's better things ahead for you, go find them.

_____________________________

Padriag

A stern discipline pervades all nature, which is a little cruel so that it may be very kind - Edmund Spencer

(in reply to IronBear)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: Ritualistic Style - 11/9/2005 6:51:10 PM   
MalevolentLyset


Posts: 20
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		Oh, I have. And Ron, not intended to offend but the way I felt about the matter and the way I viewed his actions/comments, it went exactly the way I originally said it did.

I also went back and took out the major part of the name. I had changed it before putting it up at all, but then after looking back, I realized the second half really did give away alot. (Even if this is a totally diff site from the one we met on) I apologize for that. Its what I get for posting in such haste and frustration. The conversation is still up though, I didn't take that down. Considered it, but there would be a big chunk of the story missing. I may still take it down yet....With the name changed I am less concerned with it violating the TOS.

< Message edited by MalevolentLyset -- 11/9/2005 11:52:37 PM >

(in reply to Padriag)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: Ritualistic Style - 11/9/2005 8:11:36 PM   
SirSix72


Posts: 347
Joined: 7/14/2005
Status: offline 		Greetings MalevolentLyset,

After reading all of the information you placed here from the IM you had with him I can say if he had honor he would have given you a direct line of communication to him at all times. I have never in the past decade ever done anything like that. To leave someone havging is a terrible avenue of training. I can see doing such after building a foundation of trust and mutual respect for one another. I wouldnt say that it is to coddle you but to quelch those helpless feeling of insecurities that you were feeling at the time. You have made a wise decision to leave this one alone and move foward in your journey into this lifestyle. trust is something earned and not easily given. I wish you the best in your search for a Owner that will treat you like the most beautiful possesion the world has to offer. I feel like Iron Bear if you were mine we would go out on the town in front of everyone so i could show off what I had found and polished into a beautiful gem


Master Six

_____________________________

I wish you well

(in reply to MalevolentLyset)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: Ritualistic Style - 11/10/2005 3:30:12 AM   
IronBear


Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline 		All I'm going to say Lyset, is that had you been in a collar of mine, the first thing you would have had from me would have been the means to contact me 24/7 and the instructions to do so irrespective of how small the problem was or if something had you scared. My property will always have acess to me at all times (Except when I'm working rituals).

_____________________________

Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

(in reply to SirSix72)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: Ritualistic Style - 11/10/2005 10:37:18 AM   
sub4hire


Posts: 6775
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		Hmm, you’ve allowed him into your head because of your naivety. He has done nothing but give you good reason to distrust him. Given you zero reason not to other than the mere fact he says you should not.
When I was seeking a dom I used to love messing with these type’s of peoples heads. It usually came down to they would submit to me, they were submissive all of the time but never found a good dom yet.
He is merely using you for the weakness you possess. I’d run away as fast as I can. Meet some decent people and in a year from now look back and laugh at how stupid you were a year ago to get caught up with someone like that.

(in reply to MalevolentLyset)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Ritualistic Style - 11/10/2005 12:15:49 PM   
MalevolentLyset


Posts: 20
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		Sub4hire, I'm already kicking myself. Lmao!

(in reply to sub4hire)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Ritualistic Style - 11/10/2005 2:45:23 PM   
Oberonrex


Posts: 164
Joined: 3/31/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MalevolentLyset

LuckyAlbatross....love you. lol. I have read many of your posts and love your answers. And thank you, all of you. I am bowing out of his company gracefully. It is not worth it. And there are more fish in the sea. *many hugs to all* I will keep searching.


Good! I am coming late to this, but was just getting ready to say "RUN." Something here smells bad, and I say that as one who has done this despite knowing over the years that it could cost me job, clearances, and more. Even at the most risky times for me, I was always glad to provide references and to be seen in public with those special to me.

Take your time, check them out, and be picky. You are special and deserve a special person. Go to the local get togethers, and make use of those resources because they can and will warn you of known "problems' in the area. Find one of us old farts and ask us about things and people. Also, keep in mind that you have both local groups, and also the resources of some of the Nashville groups as well. Or, if you want to be a little safer, go north to Louisville. If you like, I will be glad to see if some people I know are in both places, and arrange an introduction if they are.

Good luck with your search!

(in reply to MalevolentLyset)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Ritualistic Style - 11/12/2005 1:19:18 PM   
snmgrandmaster


Posts: 8
Joined: 9/5/2005
Status: offline 		I agree, there seems to be something not right. He could be hiding something as significent as a wife. I would suggest that you get permission to speek feely, then ask him. If hie neglects to give a satisfactory explination, then perhaps I might be having second thoughts about the pairing. Anyway beware, and maybe doing a little discreet homework around town would not hurt at all.
snmGM

(in reply to Aileen68)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Ritualistic Style - 11/12/2005 2:25:44 PM   
Cloudz


Posts: 836
Joined: 9/13/2005
Status: offline 		Sweetie,

It is hard for you to see the forest for the trees. He spoke about no emotions - which surprised me. I have never met a sub who served a Dom who did not feel emotion, or visa versa. THEN further down he describes himself as borderline heartbroken? Please! He is a manipulator, and frankly, not a very good one. Sounds like he wants someone he can rent by the hour.

WHEN you have stepped back, taken some time and decide to search again - be very up front about what you feel you need, knowing that this may change over time. If things don't feel right - tell him - if he doesn't reassure you - not in a blaming way, but in a caring way...then step back and take a deep breath.

Good luck in your search.


_____________________________

Enjoy the Journey,
~Cloudz

"Life isn't about how to survive the storm, but how to dance in the rain."


(in reply to MalevolentLyset)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: Ritualistic Style - 11/12/2005 2:59:49 PM   
theRose4U


Posts: 3403
Joined: 8/22/2005
Status: offline
quote:

It is hard for you to see the forest for the trees. He spoke about no emotions - which surprised me. I have never met a sub who served a Dom who did not feel emotion, or visa versa. THEN further down he describes himself as borderline heartbroken? Please! He is a manipulator, and frankly, not a very good one. Sounds like he wants someone he can rent by the hour.


Yes but psychotics and sociopaths rarely feel or worse show any emotion.

(in reply to Cloudz)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: Ritualistic Style - 11/12/2005 3:59:26 PM   
Padriag


Posts: 2633
Joined: 3/30/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: theRose4U

quote:

It is hard for you to see the forest for the trees. He spoke about no emotions - which surprised me. I have never met a sub who served a Dom who did not feel emotion, or visa versa. THEN further down he describes himself as borderline heartbroken? Please! He is a manipulator, and frankly, not a very good one. Sounds like he wants someone he can rent by the hour.


Yes but psychotics and sociopaths rarely feel or worse show any emotion.

That's not actually true. A psychotic's behavior is often typified by violent outbursts and unchecked aggression, they are violently emotional. Sociopaths are capable of a full range of emotional expression, they however do not generally feel guilt or remorse for their crimes as they general do not feel what they did was wrong and often feel fully justified.

This guy, from what was described, does not appear to be either. Lovingmaster put it rather bluntly, he's a pussy... or a momma's boy if you prefer. Let's not stir up hysteria with needless and baseless speculation. What I think can be very reasonably asserted is that this individual has not exhibited the behaivor of a good dominant, and probably is not a dominant at all... that's all Lyset needs to justify walking away. We don't need to turn him into a monster to justify her choice.

_____________________________

Padriag

A stern discipline pervades all nature, which is a little cruel so that it may be very kind - Edmund Spencer

(in reply to theRose4U)
Profile   Post #: 51
RE: Ritualistic Style - 11/12/2005 11:07:13 PM   
Wolfie648


Posts: 600
Joined: 9/14/2005
Status: offline
quote:

What bothered me was the fact that he doesn't even want to be in public with me, not even in a vanilla way. He actually said, "If we come across each other in public just pretend you dont know me. That way no one finds out."


Is he a public figure? A lawyer? A politician (look out). Absolutely find out if he is married, cheating, the simple fact of the matter is that not all realtionships in the lifestyle can be 'out'. At the same time there is no reason to go into something that will be one-sided. Be careful and be open. _trust your heart above all else_

D (owner of j)

_____________________________

Possibly.

(in reply to MalevolentLyset)
Profile   Post #: 52
Page:   <<   < prev  1 2 [3]
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Master >> RE: Ritualistic Style Page: <<   < prev  1 2 [3]
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.953