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Trained vs. Untrained - 7/1/2008 6:45:35 PM   
Tormentise


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I am Interested in opinions and experiences related to training a potential slave that is willing and eager to explore, but has absolutely no experience with BDSM as opposed to a potential slave that already has experienced any servitude whatsoever.

< Message edited by Tormentise -- 7/1/2008 6:52:13 PM >
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RE: Trained vs. Untrained - 7/1/2008 6:56:48 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


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I find it's got much more to do with the adaptive personality, prejudices towards life in general that matters and general relationship experience which matters most.

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RE: Trained vs. Untrained - 7/1/2008 9:28:01 PM   
CruelDesires


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Tormentise

I am Interested in opinions and experiences related to training a potential slave that is willing and eager to explore, but has absolutely no experience with BDSM as opposed to a potential slave that already has experienced any servitude whatsoever.


Huh?

CD

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RE: Trained vs. Untrained - 7/1/2008 9:36:50 PM   
FangsNfeet


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I really don't care as long as they're ready to do things my way versus something they read or may have done with someone else. Things usually go a little slower with the interested person but they catch up fast. In my experience, neither turned out to be better than the other and I have no preference in one who has been trained over someone who is just now curious.

< Message edited by FangsNfeet -- 7/1/2008 9:41:23 PM >


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RE: Trained vs. Untrained - 7/2/2008 12:14:05 AM   
kinkypuppy2


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Don't do it without a lot of studying and best of all a mentor.

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RE: Trained vs. Untrained - 7/2/2008 12:39:21 AM   
MasterFireMaam


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Depends on if they've been trained to do things the way I enjoy. If so, I like trained people. If not, I don't.

Master Fire


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RE: Trained vs. Untrained - 7/2/2008 12:48:48 AM   
chickpea


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I think the experienced ones:  Know their limits, Know how to approach a Dom in general and act in a way that's comfortable for them, Know how to ask questions, etc...

I think the inexperienced ones:  don't know their limits (they will have to be explored and tested...which means more potential harm or drama), Don't know how to act around a Dom and might overdo it or under do it (they will need to be used to taking orders from a Dom or serving), and don't know how to communicate what's going on with them as far as play. 

things will have to go slower with the inexperienced ones and more patience and energy.  with experienced ones, it might go more automatic, you will have to work on tweaking her for your own needs and preferences. 

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RE: Trained vs. Untrained - 7/2/2008 7:41:35 PM   
DesFIP


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Depends on how the personalities mesh with you.

Beyond that, it is up to you to decide if you enjoy teaching/training someone or not. Not everybody is into a student/teacher dynamic.

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RE: Trained vs. Untrained - 7/3/2008 2:51:14 AM   
celticlord2112


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Tormentise

I am Interested in opinions and experiences related to training a potential slave that is willing and eager to explore, but has absolutely no experience with BDSM as opposed to a potential slave that already has experienced any servitude whatsoever.

Any who has not been my slave begins at the position of no experience.  There is no distinction to be made.

All enter my service as virgins.  That is my way.


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RE: Trained vs. Untrained - 7/4/2008 12:06:41 AM   
Leatherist


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Trained to do WHAT? Make comparisons between the trainers and the new guy?

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RE: Trained vs. Untrained - 7/4/2008 3:23:46 AM   
Tormentise


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This post was to inquire of experiences relating to training a slave with previous experiences versus those without, not making comparisons betwen an experienced trainer as opposed to the "new guy."  One should not ever underestimate anybody, regardless of how many posts they have made or their duration of membership on this website which in turn does not necessarily reflect on their experience in real life training. I have had one experience in training and was able to get a collar on someone who previously had not ever worn one. Regardless of how long the collar actually was worn, I must have been doing something right to even get the collar there at all. It is not my intention to put a collar around somebody's neck, but around her heart.  Whipping someone into "sub space" does not appear to be that much different than just plain fucking their brains out to the point of them having to pull out their I.D. to even remember their own name.

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RE: Trained vs. Untrained - 7/4/2008 5:22:46 AM   
Focus50


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Blame it all on LuckyAlbatross; she's usually the skilled and helpful one who posts a bunch of links to previous, similar questions.  lol
 
Me, I've had relationships with previously experienced and "first day" newbie fem/subs.  Since I'm one of the (apparently) few who actually enjoys teaching my girl what she needs to know, the less experience, the better - IMO.  But no, I'd never reject a sub just because she's served others for years previous, either.  As celticlord implied, *anyone* new to me doesn't know what *I* desire or expect.
 
The newbie takes longer to train and is generally nervous and clumsy with it, as is normal for anyone confronting something new.  And I confess I take some delight in that awkwardness, particularly how they're usually obsessed with not wanting to fail or displease me.  Of course, they don't know it's impossible not to please me if they're trying their best; I just don't mention that at the time....  ;-)
 
The experienced sub still doesn't know what I require, but their previous experience usually ensures they're not nearly as nervous with it - which takes some of the edge off in comparison.  But as we say in Oz, "it's all good", because I still like the training phase regardless....
 
Focus.

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RE: Trained vs. Untrained - 7/4/2008 5:58:49 AM   
Tormentise


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Yes Focus, I also would tend to agree with CelticLord's interpretation. And I also agree with you about enjoying the teaching process. It could be compared to marrying someone who has not ever been married as opposed to someone who has been married several times which indicates that person has a problem with keeping promises. Since nobody knows everything, even the most experienced sub can still be taken to new heights.

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RE: Trained vs. Untrained - 7/5/2008 1:35:37 AM   
Duskwolf


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Focus50

Blame it all on LuckyAlbatross; she's usually the skilled and helpful one who posts a bunch of links to previous, similar questions.  lol
 
Me, I've had relationships with previously experienced and "first day" newbie fem/subs.  Since I'm one of the (apparently) few who actually enjoys teaching my girl what she needs to know, the less experience, the better - IMO.  But no, I'd never reject a sub just because she's served others for years previous, either.  As celticlord implied, *anyone* new to me doesn't know what *I* desire or expect.
 
The newbie takes longer to train and is generally nervous and clumsy with it, as is normal for anyone confronting something new.  And I confess I take some delight in that awkwardness, particularly how they're usually obsessed with not wanting to fail or displease me.  Of course, they don't know it's impossible not to please me if they're trying their best; I just don't mention that at the time....  ;-)
 
The experienced sub still doesn't know what I require, but their previous experience usually ensures they're not nearly as nervous with it - which takes some of the edge off in comparison.  But as we say in Oz, "it's all good", because I still like the training phase regardless....
 
Focus.


Again, I find myself agreeing with Celticlord and Focus...
Everyone who comes to you is inexperienced, because they don't know YOU... And training them to know you and what your expectations are should be part of the fun. :D
I also took amusement from the Aussie saying too, one I hear almost daily from my friends. :)

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RE: Trained vs. Untrained - 7/5/2008 9:38:42 AM   
EldroRolod


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I like to approach it in much the same way I train new shooters.  I PREFER that you have never fired a weapon prior to my training.  That removes the necessity to UNTRAIN any bad habits that will hinder you from becoming better.  If you are untrained, and I then train you properly, the only way you will know how to do it is THE RIGHT WAY.  But, I also find in BDSM situations that it can be fun from a Dom's perspective to test someone's previous training and alter it to suit me.  It really depends on the sub I'm working with.  Some can adjust easily, others can't adjust at all.  Either way, I get to have my fun.  LOL  But, I would have to say, on a long-term basis, someone I wanted to be deeply involved in our life....  I would prefer untrained so we could start from the beginning and evolve in a way that is suitable for everyone. 

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RE: Trained vs. Untrained - 7/6/2008 1:07:33 AM   
IronBear


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Focus raised a point which I applaud. Evcen if a girl is experienced from previous collars, she is still to you and your ways. reminising along this vein, I remember a close friend some years ago who was at the time one of the highest paid escorts here. In reply to a comment I made she stated emphatically that it matters not if a girl is a highly experiencanced courtisan, and knew 1000 way to sexually please a man, with a new man both were newbys to each others wants, needs and preferences. She further commented that she was experienced in many techniques but inexperienced in how a new client is best pleased and the most fun for her was the learning about another and how best to please him..

I'l a little in this camp in a sence that I care not if a girl is trained or untrained new to the scene. Both are new to me and to my ways of doing things. I am happy if a girl is a fully trained kajira as both the training and outlook of the Gorean Lifestyle is similar to what I use in the Victorian lifestyle with mostly dress, ettequite, terminology and protocole being soimewhat and logically different. If the girl is experienced in areas of BDSM which I dinna ken, then I will happily learn from her. Training is an excelent way to bond with a new slave, and the chance to learn a great deal about her just as she can learn a great deal about the Dominant.

IB
(The incorrigible, irrepressible and irreverent Bear)

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RE: Trained vs. Untrained - 7/10/2008 3:56:27 PM   
aleshaDreams


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celticlord, now this is the type of response that is most promising.......... it is wished more would shoulder it.  Thank You.

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RE: Trained vs. Untrained - 7/10/2008 4:24:37 PM   
CalifChick


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Tormentise
It could be compared to marrying someone who has not ever been married as opposed to someone who has been married several times which indicates that person has a problem with keeping promises.


Really?  Having been married more than once means you have a problem keeping promises?  Well fuck me runnin'!  You learn something new every day.

Cali


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RE: Trained vs. Untrained - 7/10/2008 4:28:58 PM   
IntellectualSub1


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Tormentise - I would really like to contact you - but your profile is not available. 

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RE: Trained vs. Untrained - 7/10/2008 6:17:57 PM   
cillydom


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i wonder what a grown woman needs to be trained to do

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