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sub/slaves sabotage themselves - 7/6/2008 11:29:38 AM   
LadyCharly


Posts: 19
Joined: 1/18/2005
Status: offline 		So tell Me boys/girls, why is it you are so quick to overreact on small, silly things and terminate an exchange with a Mistress you contacted? Many of you state what you want, then sabotage it before you get the chance to persue it!

For instance: I just finished an exchange with a boy who supposedly knew what he wanted and contacted Me. We went from CM to yahoo messenger, then yahoo screwed up and he immediately contacted Me on CM to terminate. Then I informed him yahoo was screwing up, then CM slowed down and he questioned why I wasn't responding. Then I told him I'd try rebooting My pc and he didn't seem very happy as he only had an hour. Then he sent multiple links for Me to look at and was upset because I didn't respond on liking/disliking what he sent. Then he started using cap locks and didn't fix the problem. he terminated the exchange then blocked Me. Note: he didn't seem to be a troll or a....what do the brits call them?... a wanker.

Now keep in mind, we both were on the same page as us seeking the same thing, I am a Sadist and he a masochist, I am Mistress and he not a slave, if it worked out the TPE would be there on the intense level both of us supposedly sought, no MAJOR issues came out of our exchange, etc. The big picture seemed in place, yet he tossed it over small insignifacant chit!

So I'd like to hear from submissives and slaves only as to why you would cut off your nose to spite your face and chuck what quite possibly could be the relationship you long for, because every little thing doesn't go your way? Yet all the large important things to the relationship seem to be in place! Being an intelligent Woman, it's beyond My comprehension as to why any of you who truly seek a life long M/s relationship or a Sadist who can give you more than you ever dreamed of would sabotage the possibility over things that can be overcame far easier, then the bigger things.... Please help Me to understand!
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: sub/slaves sabotage themselves - 7/6/2008 11:33:41 AM   
firstslaveca


Posts: 46
Joined: 4/29/2008
Status: offline 		fear...........

(in reply to LadyCharly)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: sub/slaves sabotage themselves - 7/6/2008 11:37:41 AM   
SirMIkeSD


Posts: 613
Joined: 3/16/2007
From: San Diego, Ca
Status: offline 		when they are wanking talking to you, they don't have that much time

Mike

(in reply to firstslaveca)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: sub/slaves sabotage themselves - 7/6/2008 11:41:40 AM   
LadyCharly


Posts: 19
Joined: 1/18/2005
Status: offline 		fear in what context? If you state what you seek (and should obviously really want it) and contact a Mistress who could be the One to give it to you, then what would you have to fear?  Please elaborate for Me if you're comfortable in doing so...

(in reply to firstslaveca)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: sub/slaves sabotage themselves - 7/6/2008 11:43:21 AM   
CalifChick


Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline 		He only had an hour? So he was at a public library huh?

Cali


_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

(in reply to LadyCharly)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: sub/slaves sabotage themselves - 7/6/2008 11:46:54 AM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline 		Cali....yanno I love you, but I gotta go with Mike on this one....LOL

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to CalifChick)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: sub/slaves sabotage themselves - 7/6/2008 11:47:22 AM   
softness


Posts: 2918
Joined: 8/1/2006
From: Leeds, UK
Status: offline 		well ... hmmms .. how do I put this

Your profile and the OP present what could be seen as a fairly abrasive tone. Now plenty of us get messed around online by difficult annoying morons who behave like we should be honoured they speak to us. I am not saying you are a moron, but there are plenty out there and it is intensely annoying having to play nice with all the idiots while we find people worth talking to.

I am guessing ... that whne your yahoo failed and the CM slowed down, he wasn't experiencing a slow down. Usually the type of person who comes to the board for a rant early on in their time here ... is fairly volatile in their online behaviour. Perhaps the way you reacted to his questioning coupled with other things he had seen about you that he disliked .. closed the deal .. and resulted in you getting blocked.

also .. lovers that you had the TPE all mapped out during an initial conversation .... thats like rapid work there ... how could anyone resist.

_____________________________

proudly wearing the blue collar of consideration to DK Leather, Leatherdykeuk, and LeatherEagle of the UK KRueL Leather Family

veritas, respectus honorque in corio





(in reply to firstslaveca)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: sub/slaves sabotage themselves - 7/6/2008 11:52:14 AM   
LadyCharly


Posts: 19
Joined: 1/18/2005
Status: offline 		With all due respect, I placed this on Ask a submissive/slave not ask a Dominant.... I'd appreciate only submissives and slaves responding, as it is they I seek to hear from. 

(in reply to GreedyTop)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: sub/slaves sabotage themselves - 7/6/2008 11:55:07 AM   
softness


Posts: 2918
Joined: 8/1/2006
From: Leeds, UK
Status: offline 		*puts head in hands* ... this thread is going to go really well

_____________________________

proudly wearing the blue collar of consideration to DK Leather, Leatherdykeuk, and LeatherEagle of the UK KRueL Leather Family

veritas, respectus honorque in corio





(in reply to LadyCharly)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: sub/slaves sabotage themselves - 7/6/2008 11:57:18 AM   
sirsholly


Posts: 42360
Joined: 9/7/2007
From: Quietville
Status: offline

_____________________________

PICKED UPON
TECHNO-DOLT
MEMBER OF THE SUBBIE MAFIA
GRACEFULLY CHALLENGED :::::splat:::::
BOOT WHORE
VAA/S FAN

GIVES GOOD HEART (Lushy)

CREATOR OF MAYHEM (practice)


(in reply to softness)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: sub/slaves sabotage themselves - 7/6/2008 11:58:00 AM   
CalifChick


Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline 		LMAO at the visual that softness just gave.  Greedy dear, if it takes him an hour to "wank off", then he really must be an amateur.  Seriously? An hour?  Pfffffttttttttttttttttttttt.

Cali


_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

(in reply to softness)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: sub/slaves sabotage themselves - 7/6/2008 11:59:06 AM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline 		brings an aspirin on a silver platter to Master Softness

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to softness)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: sub/slaves sabotage themselves - 7/6/2008 12:01:14 PM   
softness


Posts: 2918
Joined: 8/1/2006
From: Leeds, UK
Status: offline 		*pats Red patronisingly on the head and swallows the pill* .... your group hug has been procured ... I mean organised for next thrusday evening ... you need to bring the jelly for post hug wrestling ... k?

_____________________________

proudly wearing the blue collar of consideration to DK Leather, Leatherdykeuk, and LeatherEagle of the UK KRueL Leather Family

veritas, respectus honorque in corio





(in reply to RedMagic1)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: sub/slaves sabotage themselves - 7/6/2008 12:03:26 PM   
mbes


Posts: 465
Joined: 12/14/2006
Status: offline 		Subs and slaves "cut off their noses" for the same reasons doms and nillas do. Fear (of the unknown, of the known, that one is biting off more than one can chew) could be the reason. It also could be chemistry. What feels right to one doesn't always feel the same to the other. It could be that what sounded good at first, becomes less appealing with further exploration. It could be just a gut reaction to a red flag or five, or a trigger that is hit. Those are off the top of my head, I'm sure there are many others.
The only way to know one person's reason in a particular instance is to ask that person, and hope he or she is aware enough to know.

(in reply to LadyCharly)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: sub/slaves sabotage themselves - 7/6/2008 12:03:58 PM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline 		Oy.

Ok, I don't know if that response was meant to be directed at me.. but here goes:

do you seriously think that YOU are the ONLY PERSON EVER that this has happened to???  By not being willing to listen to responses from either side of the dreaded slash, you are limiting the pool of potentially helpful responses.
Some of the tops/doms who have experienced this same kind of thing may be able to give you insight based on THEIR experiences.

just saying


_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to LadyCharly)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: sub/slaves sabotage themselves - 7/6/2008 12:08:39 PM   
NeedingMore220


Posts: 615
Joined: 6/5/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyCharly
So I'd like to hear from submissives and slaves only as to why you would cut off your nose to spite your face and chuck what quite possibly could be the relationship you long for, because every little thing doesn't go your way? Yet all the large important things to the relationship seem to be in place! Being an intelligent Woman, it's beyond My comprehension as to why any of you who truly seek a life long M/s relationship or a Sadist who can give you more than you ever dreamed of would sabotage the possibility over things that can be overcame far easier, then the bigger things.... Please help Me to understand!



You're generalizing about submissives, extrapolating how you think submissives act based on one or a few chats, which I find mildly offensive.  I don't cut off my nose to spite my face.  I've only blocked one or two people who were offensive.  I am an intelligent woman and haven't, to the best of my knowledge, sabotaged myself.

Perhaps those you've spoken with who blocked you didn't really want to move from online to real-time - they may have just wanted wanking material - go figure!  Maybe they just didn't like you and were too chicken to say so.  Maybe they are just nuts.  Maybe a lot of things ... but no one on this board will be able to tell you, unless they are the person who blocked you. 

(in reply to LadyCharly)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: sub/slaves sabotage themselves - 7/6/2008 12:17:34 PM   
LadyCharly


Posts: 19
Joined: 1/18/2005
Status: offline
My profile is meant to deter those who really aren't seeking an M/s relationship that is true. But I don't expect anything more than those contacting Me are who they claim. As we all know it's very easy to call oneself a Mistress or slave, but that doesn't make them one. We conversed over a 2 hour period and during that time I didn't demand anything from him. It was simply Q&A and feeling each other out to see if it would constitute at a later time speaking on the phone and perhaps meeting. Which btw, is how I handle 99% of My exchanges.... I don't nor do I allow a sub/slave to move fast, as it takes time to build a strong foundation to any relationship! I am speaking of a life long commitment (which I understand not everyone desires!) here not online playing of games for a few hours, a day, a week or a month....

So am I too take it that he just wish to rant at any little thing although he was the one who acted interested? Is that how everyone is online? Then why should any Dominant bother with CM contacts? Damn that would put us between a rock and a hard place, damn if you-damned if you don't scenario....i.e. If I don't answer an email that's wrong and if I do, then they just want to rant and waste My time.... Geeez then why is any of us here?

(in reply to softness)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: sub/slaves sabotage themselves - 7/6/2008 12:22:00 PM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

Cali....yanno I love you, but I gotta go with Mike on this one....LOL


Maybe they're BOTH right?


_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to GreedyTop)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: sub/slaves sabotage themselves - 7/6/2008 12:23:14 PM   
softness


Posts: 2918
Joined: 8/1/2006
From: Leeds, UK
Status: offline 		was your rant there (or the second half of it) directed towards me? ... or was it just general?

cos like .... Top Gear is on and I wont bother missing the show writing a response if the rant was a generic one

_____________________________

proudly wearing the blue collar of consideration to DK Leather, Leatherdykeuk, and LeatherEagle of the UK KRueL Leather Family

veritas, respectus honorque in corio





(in reply to LadyCharly)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: sub/slaves sabotage themselves - 7/6/2008 12:25:26 PM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

Cali....yanno I love you, but I gotta go with Mike on this one....LOL


Maybe they're BOTH right?



could be, but I cant imagine it would be easy to wank while in the library..although that COULD explain  the hours time - kept getting interrupted,...


_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 20
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