SUB NEEDS HELP- HE WANTS ME TO BE DOM... I DON"T KNOW WHAT TO DO

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SUB NEEDS HELP- HE WANTS ME TO BE DOM... I DON"T K... - 11/11/2005 7:21:36 PM

Laurali

Posts: 1
Joined: 10/21/2005
Status: offline

Here's the deal, I have been messing with my regular play mate for about 3 years... Now he wants me to be Dom... He's not into pain- I need advice on some good things I can do to make him happy... PLease help!!!

Laurali

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RE: SUB NEEDS HELP- HE WANTS ME TO BE DOM... I DON"... - 11/11/2005 7:23:42 PM

GlobalSkulls

Posts: 40
Joined: 11/6/2005
Status: offline

You can talk to him on what he wants you to do. Also dont use caps on titles. Its fairly rude. An offical un-written law of the net. Its n0t 1337.

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RE: SUB NEEDS HELP- HE WANTS ME TO BE DOM... I DON"... - 11/11/2005 7:25:50 PM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
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Talk to him, go with what is already in your minds and build on that.

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RE: SUB NEEDS HELP- HE WANTS ME TO BE DOM... I DON"... - 11/11/2005 7:28:42 PM

Synocense

Posts: 255
Joined: 8/8/2004
Status: offline

To dominate does not equal pain. To submit does not equal pain.
What is it he wants? To relinquish control? Is he hoping for less
responsiblity in the relationship. I suggest a long conversation.

Good luck
Syn

_____________________________

Before you speak, ask yourself..
Is it kind? Is it true? Is it necessary?
Does it improve upon the silence?

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RE: SUB NEEDS HELP- HE WANTS ME TO BE DOM... I DON"... - 11/11/2005 7:37:41 PM

mnottertail

Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
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First thing, don't panic and don't shout like that again.......Jesus Fuckin' christ that hurt.

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Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30

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RE: SUB NEEDS HELP- HE WANTS ME TO BE DOM... I DON"... - 11/11/2005 7:53:53 PM

justmira

Posts: 16
Joined: 9/14/2005
Status: offline

Hi,

Does he want to be dominated for a long time or just for a short one off playtime to see what it's like to be sub?

It's hard to say what you could do without knowing things like what he is into, what he wants to get from it and what you have experience doing. But a suggestion if it's only for a short period so that he can feel what it's like to be a sub ...

Put some mousetraps randomly around a room. Gag and blindfold him (if he's into these things) and tell him he has to crawl around the room to find something .. maybe keys to handcuffs if you have them, you could put the handcuffs on him first and he needs to get the keys to have them taken off.

After he is blindfolded, remove the mousetraps so that he can't get hurt but don't tell him that they are gone. Toss the keys out into the room and tell him that he has to crawl to find them, and that you will tell him if he gets too close to a mousetrap. As he is crawling give him instructions to go left or right to miss the "mousetraps".

He'd be totally dependant on you to avoid the "mousetraps".

Just a thought.

cheers
mira

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RE: SUB NEEDS HELP- HE WANTS ME TO BE DOM... I DON"... - 11/11/2005 8:28:30 PM

slavejali

Posts: 2918
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Laurali: that would be my worst nightmare come true..which made me think ...i hope all goes well for you..if that happened to me..im sure i would *try* but it would mess with my head so much i think my relationship would change permanently. Seems to me tho, your happy and willing to do the switch...so more power to you, to coin a phrase *grin*

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RE: SUB NEEDS HELP- HE WANTS ME TO BE DOM... I DON"... - 11/11/2005 8:40:10 PM

jro2020

Posts: 160
Joined: 10/23/2005
From: Idaho
Status: offline

I agree I want more details, is this jsut a switch for a scene or is this long term? If you won't do it how do you feel if he finds someone to Dom him if he continues to top you? Short incomplete questions rarely get good results. Please think about exactly what opinions you want and what your specific questions are, and don't yell.

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RE: SUB NEEDS HELP- HE WANTS ME TO BE DOM... I DON"... - 11/11/2005 8:49:08 PM

mnottertail

Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
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Be a 23 year old spunky irish chick, whatever you do get yours..........
He has been warned right?

Ron
because I thought the better of it.

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Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30

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RE: SUB NEEDS HELP- HE WANTS ME TO BE DOM... I DON"... - 11/12/2005 8:45:14 AM

fyreredsub

Posts: 3403
Joined: 10/7/2005
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have him spread eagle on the bed on his belly, restrain him w/ chains,blind him,gag him and then make him wait a bit w/ you messing w/ stuff in the room,then give him a tongue bath..........the anticipating what you are going to do ....may be a good mind fuck..and you don't have to cause pain....

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"Accordingly, men must then either fulfill their nature, or deny it, and in denying their nature, deny us ours, for ours is the complement to theirs. " Renegades

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RE: SUB NEEDS HELP- HE WANTS ME TO BE DOM... I DON"... - 11/12/2005 8:48:27 AM

redheadedfire4u

Posts: 104
Joined: 11/11/2005
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my god that would be my worse nightmare ... I think I would run round room screaming and fall in a heap in the corner a gibbering mess till I fell asleep from exhaustion .... eeek if there is a god please never let this happen to me ... no help to your predicament I am affraid but I wish you all the best

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RE: SUB NEEDS HELP- HE WANTS ME TO BE DOM... I DON"... - 11/12/2005 9:01:38 AM

GoddessDustyGold

Posts: 2822
Joined: 4/11/2004
From: Arizona
Status: offline

This question comes up far too often for My comfort. And it seems to be happening more and more.
Here's a recent thread that may be helpful for you.
"I'm So Lost" in Ask A Mistress
That will probably give you more insight into the various ways a boy can submit and how he might wish to be careful what he asks for!
Good luck and welcome to the boards.

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Dusty
They that give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety
B Franklin
Don't blame Me ~ I didn't vote for either of them
The Hidden Kingdom

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RE: SUB NEEDS HELP- HE WANTS ME TO BE DOM... I DON"... - 11/14/2005 12:53:00 PM

EvilGeoff

Posts: 523
Joined: 8/24/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Laurali

Here's the deal, I have been messing with my regular play mate for about 3 years... Now he wants me to be Dom... He's not into pain- I need advice on some good things I can do to make him happy... PLease help!!!

Laurali

Hi Laurali,

Since I am male and exclusively been the Owner/Operator of female submissives, I'm not really a good source for advice on dominating a suddenly submissive male. My best advice? Get online, and head to Fetish Auctioneer - http://www.fetishauctioneer.com
or pop over to Amazon.com - http://www.amazon.com

And search for: Miss Abernathy's Concise Slave Training Manual by Christina Abernathy

It is an absolutely wonderful book for the beginning Dominant woman (not bad for guys either, gives you a different perspective to consider... ). Other excellent resources:
The Topping Book by Easton and Liszt, and Screw the Roses, Give Me the Thorns by Miller and Devon.

Good reading and the best of luck!
- Geoff

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Post #: 13