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What women on here looking for??? - 7/11/2008 3:28:34 PM   
weezyfbaby733


Posts: 19
Joined: 6/16/2008
Status: offline
My names Luke and I'm a 19-year old switch heterosexual male looking for a lady the same age. I figured this site would be the best way to meet other women into the same BDSM-related activities as I am. I've messaged quite a few women close to my age and I'm pretty surprised to see that I'm not gettin' very many replies...at all.
I generally send a message including a charming sentence pertaining to something in their full profile so they know I'm just not sending the same message to everyone. Next usually includes my name, and "we should chat sometime".
Haha I don't see what I'm doing wrong, I'm not rude or weird in any way. And I figure the woman viewing my message tries to have the worst perspective of who I am, considering they don't know me.
How the hell am I supposed to find someone on here if noones gonna answer? Haha any suggestions? haha sexy one-liners? lol please help


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RE: What women on here looking for??? - 7/11/2008 3:35:18 PM   
greenearth21


Posts: 228
Joined: 7/9/2006
Status: offline
take your time...potential partners look at what you have to offer and how it fits in with what they  seek.  It could be one single thing or a variety of things about you such as your age, location, what you seek, something in your profile, your preferences or the email you wrote then that just doesn't mesh up with what interests them
All good things come with time.

(in reply to weezyfbaby733)
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RE: What women on here looking for??? - 7/11/2008 3:41:10 PM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
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http://www.collarchat.com/fb.asp?m=1717756

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

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RE: What women on here looking for??? - 7/11/2008 3:43:19 PM   
simpleplan2


Posts: 461
Joined: 7/5/2008
Status: offline
How about you just tell them something about yourself...you, the person.  When I get an email that says we should chat sometime or with the person's telephone number, I feel pressured and most likely won't answer.

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RE: What women on here looking for??? - 7/11/2008 3:45:31 PM   
NumberSix


Posts: 1378
Joined: 12/30/2006
Status: offline
LOL, you pressure easy.

Any number of things; snuffing up a strange woman's package......any number of things.

Run, Forest, run.



_____________________________

"Who are you?"
"The new Number Two."
"Who is Number One?"
"You are Number Six.".
"I am not a number — I am a free man!"

Be seeing you...

(in reply to simpleplan2)
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RE: What women on here looking for??? - 7/11/2008 3:51:30 PM   
Lockit


Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline
Maybe people are reading your profile and post on the board and are seeing the same sarcastic and rude I have seen and are responding to that with no response. The Rome of bdsm and relationships isn't built in a day and I think a bit more time and polish might do some good here.  But then that is what I think... but you did ask.

(in reply to greenearth21)
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RE: What women on here looking for??? - 7/11/2008 4:00:14 PM   
slvemike4u


Posts: 17896
Joined: 1/15/2008
From: United States
Status: offline
As usual well said Lockit...I would add this ,have patience young man,while it is quite possible to have quick "hook-ups" with people you meet here,I am reminded of the old story of the 2 bulls which goes like this...Two bulls are surveying the herd from a hill top, young bull say's to older bull "Why don't we run down there and f**k us a cow" to which the older and wiser bull says "why don't we walk and f**k them all"...IMO these things take time as most things worth doing tend to

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RE: What women on here looking for??? - 7/11/2008 4:03:20 PM   
Daddystouch


Posts: 162
Joined: 10/20/2006
From: South East England
Status: offline
Also 19. Been on CM a few weeks now, and age and inexperience do limit you. At least as a dom, couldn't speak for switches. Not being interested in girls much older than you limits your choices a lot, and being young and inexperienced means fewer are interested in you than would otherwise be the case.

None the less I've managed to make some good friends, have some fun, and even find some potential romance ;) So even if those potentials don't work out, I think it's only a matter of time before something does.

I've found messaging girls to be very ineffective. I message any interesting, genuine-appearifing female sub in my age range that's near enough to see for a day that I spot on the homepage, and I've only got a couple of replies. Most said they were looking for an older man, one was much more productive :)

I'd reccommend trying out the chatrooms, they're a lot of fun and you meet interesting people and make friends and you never know, some one might like the sound of you. People also check out your profile via the chatroom so it's a good way to put yourself out there.

You do have to understand that a lot of girls on here are absolutely drowning in messages  so a lot of them just don't get read, and even if they do, they may just not have time to reply.


_____________________________

What men in all the world have shown such daring?

(in reply to Lockit)
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RE: What women on here looking for??? - 7/11/2008 4:10:12 PM   
faerytattoodgirl


Posts: 5824
Status: offline
think of it this way..

you walk into a bar...see a girl you like...you go and offer a drink...they say no...get lost....you say to yourself... "STRIKE 1"

...etc.

its the same for any online personal/bdsm site.  one might actually respond with a yes.


_____________________________

I did not reply to your cmail.
I am flawed.
Imperfect.
MUST SPANK!!!
SPAAAAAAAANK!!!

(in reply to weezyfbaby733)
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RE: What women on here looking for??? - 7/11/2008 4:13:55 PM   
simpleplan2


Posts: 461
Joined: 7/5/2008
Status: offline
Damn right!  Why do you think I have my hands up in the air?  PRESSURE!

(in reply to NumberSix)
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RE: What women on here looking for??? - 7/11/2008 4:18:37 PM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline
Your profile says nothing except you want to keep this a secret and you attend a university. I'd not respond just based on the first thing because it says you're not totally comfortable with yourself yet. May not be true, but that's what it says to me. But then, you'd not be contacting me as I'm not your age, so my point may or may not be moot.

Master Fire


_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to weezyfbaby733)
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RE: What women on here looking for??? - 7/11/2008 4:23:31 PM   
dawntreader


Posts: 3045
Joined: 11/23/2006
Status: offline
Like MFM above me, i am not in your range but i wanted to comment to your question. Some of us are not seeking anyone...

_____________________________

It is choice - not chance - that determines our destiny~
Jean Nidetch

There is a war going on for your mind...if you are thinking, you are winning~
Flobots

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)
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RE: What women on here looking for??? - 7/11/2008 4:31:40 PM   
NumberSix


Posts: 1378
Joined: 12/30/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: simpleplan2

Damn right!  Why do you think I have my hands up in the air?  PRESSURE!


I thought it was to re-balance your life without any head.

Mm ba ba de
Um bum ba de
Um bu bu bum da de
Pressure pushing down on me
Pressing down on you no man ask for
Under pressure - that burns a building down
Splits a family in two
Puts people on streets
Um ba ba be
Um ba ba be
De day da
Ee day da - that's o.k.
It's the terror of knowing
What this world is about
Watching some good friends
Screaming 'Let me out'
Pray tomorrow - gets me higher
Pressure on people - people on streets
Day day de mm hm
Da da da ba ba
O.k.
Chippin' around - kick my brains around the floor
These are the days it never rains but it pours
Ee do ba be
Ee da ba ba ba
Um bo bo
Be lap
People on streets - ee da de da de
People on streets - ee da de da de da de da
It's the terror of knowing
What this world is about
Watching some good friends
Screaming 'Let me out'
Pray tomorrow - gets me higher high high
Pressure on people - people on streets
Turned away from it all like a blind man
Sat on a fence but it don't work
Keep coming up with love
but it's so slashed and torn
Why - why - why ?
Love love love love love
Insanity laughs under pressure we're cracking
Can't we give ourselves one more chance
Why can't we give love that one more chance
Why can't we give love give love give love give love
give love give love give love give love give love
'Cause love's such an old fashioned word
And love dares you to care for
The people on the edge of the night
And loves dares you to change our way of
Caring about ourselves
This is our last dance
This is our last dance
This is ourselves
Under pressure
Under pressure
Pressure



Queen 6

_____________________________

"Who are you?"
"The new Number Two."
"Who is Number One?"
"You are Number Six.".
"I am not a number — I am a free man!"

Be seeing you...

(in reply to simpleplan2)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: What women on here looking for??? - 7/11/2008 5:24:56 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline
I looked at your screen name and immediately assumed you're into AB and if so, that will limit you as it's not at all common.

Beyond that, your profile tells us nothing about you and your post leads me to think you just want a quick hook up.

Get involved in your local community. Go to munches. Attend workshops. You can learn new skills so a bottom won't run away believing you don't know what you're doing, and you'll be able to tell if the top knows what they're doing. In the meantime you can volunteer to be a demo bottom and people will get to know your face.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to NumberSix)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: What women on here looking for??? - 7/11/2008 7:06:01 PM   
slvemike4u


Posts: 17896
Joined: 1/15/2008
From: United States
Status: offline
What are the chances the young man listens to any of this well meaning advice....and please don't take that as an insult,I was once 19 and nobody could tell me anything...it is a function of youth that by the time they realise they don't know eveything,they no longer qualify as youth

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: What women on here looking for??? - 7/11/2008 7:12:26 PM   
weezyfbaby733


Posts: 19
Joined: 6/16/2008
Status: offline
whats ab mean?
and no I keep it a secret because I don't really want to be known to the public as a pevert
unfortunatley the "vanilla-world" doesn't share much respect for people with bondage fetishes haha i wish it weren't so, but it is.

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: What women on here looking for??? - 7/11/2008 7:42:38 PM   
variation30


Posts: 1190
Joined: 12/1/2007
From: Alabama
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: weezyfbaby733

My names Luke and I'm a 19-year old switch heterosexual male looking for a lady the same age. I figured this site would be the best way to meet other women into the same BDSM-related activities as I am. I've messaged quite a few women close to my age and I'm pretty surprised to see that I'm not gettin' very many replies...at all.


I wouldn't worry about it. it does not appear that CM is a good place to actually meet people for bdsm activites - use your local community and bars for that. from my experience, when you do get messages they will be short and flirty and the conversations will end up being somewhat affected and clumsy. a lot of the profiles of younger women are also blatant fakes so that may explain a bit of the silence you're getting on the other end as well. Now by fake I don't mean they 'oh you don't like me you must be a fake' kind of fake. I mean 'hey I've seen that picture on multiple modeling sites...you're probably not who you are saying you are' kind of fake.

quote:

I generally send a message including a charming sentence pertaining to something in their full profile so they know I'm just not sending the same message to everyone. Next usually includes my name, and "we should chat sometime".
Haha I don't see what I'm doing wrong, I'm not rude or weird in any way. And I figure the woman viewing my message tries to have the worst perspective of who I am, considering they don't know me.
How the hell am I supposed to find someone on here if noones gonna answer? Haha any suggestions? haha sexy one-liners? lol please help


meh. CM isn't the happening place for young straight males, I hate to burst your bubble. a lot of females there, though not all, are looking for more experienced doms which oftentimes equates to being an older dom. get used to it. I would suggest hanging around the forums and gleaning information from some people's posts, chiming in when you feel like it, and getting the funke name around the watercooler that way.

also stay logged in a bit and let people who are profile surfing come to you.

< Message edited by variation30 -- 7/11/2008 7:44:06 PM >


_____________________________

all the good ones are collared or lesbians.

or old.

(in reply to weezyfbaby733)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: What women on here looking for??? - 7/11/2008 7:51:00 PM   
variation30


Posts: 1190
Joined: 12/1/2007
From: Alabama
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterFireMaam

Your profile says nothing except you want to keep this a secret and you attend a university. I'd not respond just based on the first thing because it says you're not totally comfortable with yourself yet. May not be true, but that's what it says to me. But then, you'd not be contacting me as I'm not your age, so my point may or may not be moot.

Master Fire



don't know if I can agree with you there. discretion is desirable for quite a few reasons. for instance, I wouldn't want to embarrass my family by having some internet jerk start linking my collarme.com profile around.

nor would I want the fact that I want to literally own a woman get in the way of my professional life. I think the psychology department may raise an eyebrow if they knew they had someone teaching a py101 class who also liked taking a riding crop to the occasional sexual partner.


_____________________________

all the good ones are collared or lesbians.

or old.

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: What women on here looking for??? - 7/11/2008 7:52:13 PM   
variation30


Posts: 1190
Joined: 12/1/2007
From: Alabama
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: slvemike4u

What are the chances the young man listens to any of this well meaning advice....and please don't take that as an insult,I was once 19 and nobody could tell me anything...it is a function of youth that by the time they realise they don't know eveything,they no longer qualify as youth


I was under the impression that it was you old dogs who can no longer be taught new tricks.


_____________________________

all the good ones are collared or lesbians.

or old.

(in reply to slvemike4u)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: What women on here looking for??? - 7/11/2008 8:04:30 PM   
masterforRT


Posts: 176
Joined: 5/16/2008
Status: offline
From what I see, about 2/3rd of them are looking for other women-NOT men!

(in reply to variation30)
Profile   Post #: 20
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