RE: Cunnilingus - are you converted? (Full Version)

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patwi -> RE: Cunnilingus - are you converted? (7/15/2008 7:15:27 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: HeavansKeeper


I'm usually the dirty talker with My Pet, but when my mouth is occupied, she picks up the slack.


You could always motorboat, for a change of pace.



HeavansKeeper -> RE: Cunnilingus - are you converted? (7/15/2008 8:13:58 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: patwi

quote:

ORIGINAL: HeavansKeeper


I'm usually the dirty talker with My Pet, but when my mouth is occupied, she picks up the slack.


You could always motorboat, for a change of pace.



How does that quote go?  If sex is the most fun you can have without laughing, then you're doing it wrong?



TreasureKY -> RE: Cunnilingus - are you converted? (7/15/2008 9:13:18 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: HeavansKeeper

On a side note, I find it goes better for everyone if she is very vocal about everything.  How good it feels, where she wants it, moaning and screaming, how good he is (that's a good ego booster, it gives the tongue renewed vigor).  I'm usually the dirty talker with My Pet, but when my mouth is occupied, she picks up the slack.


This brings up an interesting point that might better be served as a post on its own, however...

I'm a relatively quiet type, naturally.  If I had to devote part of my attention to remembering to be vocal, or to try to think up compliments or make suggestions, I'd never get there.   To say I have to focus would be incorrect, but in order to orgasm, I need to get lost in the physical sensations.  I want to enjoy what I'm feeling... revel in the sensations that are playing across my body.  Little moans, gasps and soft purrs will escape from me from time to time, but they are spontaneous and uncontrolled... not theatrically calculated.  I find that just trying to remember to announce when I come is enough to make the whole exercise pointless... I never get there.  I might as well be concentrating on next week's grocery list.

I can understand how that might affect the ego of some males who believe that if responses aren't vocal and loud then the sex must not be good.  While I'm sure that many women are naturally very vocal, I suspect that the porn industry can be thanked for making noise (and the overused cliché of, "I'm coming") a popular gauge for sexual satisfaction.  For me, though, a man can take my relative silence as a huge compliment... it means that he's got me so wrapped up in what he's making me feel that I've lost the capacity for coherent thought or speech.  [;)]

I may not be the norm, but I'm guessing I'm not alone.  It pays to know your partner. 



anguisette22 -> RE: Cunnilingus - are you converted? (7/15/2008 9:18:49 AM)

I dislike receiving it. It feels good but I'm just bored the entire time. I guess I have a hard time seeing it as anything other than a submissive act, I can't help but feel turned off by it. Don't bother explaining to me how it's not; I know in my mind that it's not an exclusively submissive thing, but wherever my sexual kinks come from doesn't.



subtee -> RE: Cunnilingus - are you converted? (7/15/2008 9:30:56 AM)

I feel bad that so many dislike it. However, I would like to offer that, since I LOVE to receive, and do so with gracious and grateful screaming my head off, let's not force these nice ladies to convert. I'll be a sub-sub.

You're welcome.[;)]



HeavansKeeper -> RE: Cunnilingus - are you converted? (7/15/2008 9:33:07 AM)

Treasure,

Talking dirty, or for that matter making any sounds that are not natural, distracts me.  (Although my efforts are usually focused on stamina, so a lack of concentration leads to orgasm, not lack of it [:)]) 

If you communicate well with your partner, they will know that your look of outer dimensional ecstacy is a compliment.  If you don't, they could assume you're trying diligantly to get any pleasure there is to be had out of a feeble attempt at pleasuring you.  Like you said, it pays to know.

Anguisette,

Do I understand you correctly that you feel receiving oral is a submissive act?  I feel the opposite, so I'm interested as to why you feel that way?



cjan -> RE: Cunnilingus - are you converted? (7/15/2008 10:09:12 AM)

tee, since you so love to receive head and I so love to give head, perhaps we could have a shallow, oral relationship...a win/win. [image]http://www.collarchat.com/upfiles/smiley/flowers.gif[/image]



subtee -> RE: Cunnilingus - are you converted? (7/15/2008 10:11:43 AM)

This is what I'm saying. You so get me!



KatyLied -> RE: Cunnilingus - are you converted? (7/15/2008 10:11:48 AM)

Peforming oral sex on a sub is a good way of controlling her.
I'm a fan, but only if the person doing it is skilled and has a clue, otherwise, no thanks.



myotherself -> RE: Cunnilingus - are you converted? (7/15/2008 10:50:12 AM)

**fast reply***

Love giving head, hate receiving it.  I find it takes too long to get me stimulated and the actions are just too gentle.  I don't do gentle sex!  I'm MUCH happier with his hand inside me huntin' for the that yummy g-spot...[:D]



Lucylastic -> RE: Cunnilingus - are you converted? (7/15/2008 11:39:47 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: myotherself
I'm MUCH happier with his hand inside me huntin' for the that yummy g-spot...[:D]

I Love that thought, that works tooo, LOL and thats what matters, eh?
Lucy



WyldHrt -> RE: Cunnilingus - are you converted? (7/15/2008 9:20:00 PM)

quote:

I'm a relatively quiet type, naturally.  If I had to devote part of my attention to remembering to be vocal, or to try to think up compliments or make suggestions, I'd never get there.

Nope, you're not alone, Treasure! I'm also one who tends to be naturally quiet (sex in tents during the day at Renn Faire may be a contributing factor also, lol), and being loud is something I would have to fake- a la bad porn. [8|]









TreasureKY -> RE: Cunnilingus - are you converted? (7/15/2008 11:02:59 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: HeavansKeeper

... they could assume you're trying diligantly to get any pleasure there is to be had out of a feeble attempt at pleasuring you. 


lol... Well, in some cases, that might have been true, too.  [;)]



BrokenSaint -> RE: Cunnilingus - are you converted? (7/16/2008 1:27:06 AM)

I've only really been with one girl who disliked it on the basis of past experiences, and never really had an orgasm from oral even previous to those experiences. But then it was rather difficult for her to orgasm in the first place when we first met on the basis of those same past experiences (rape victim, so yeah that tends to haywire things a bit). Rather than pounding mercilessly at it like some sort of evil automaton I focused on building trust in the relationship, as I figured off the bat that was a component of the whole thing. I was correct, and her friends bought me drinks :D.

Personally I've always enjoyed giving and receiving oral sex. Especially at the same time. Sex without a bit of a changeup just isn't really the same. Also cunnilingus is an extremely valuable tool for control reasons.  Nothing quite like that little squirm of frustration when someone is just begging to be allowed to orgasm.

But yeah, don't give up on it completely. To do so I think would be unneccesarily limiting. So you try it for a bit with a new person, maybe you don't enjoy it, you've lost a bit of your time and can move on to things you do enjoy, or perhaps that person is the one who turns you into a convert and you've found a new fun activity to indulge in.



WyldHrt -> RE: Cunnilingus - are you converted? (7/16/2008 1:42:33 AM)

quote:

... they could assume you're trying diligantly to get any pleasure there is to be had out of a feeble attempt at pleasuring you. 

If you're doing it right, the difference is rather obvious, lol.
Please direct any questions about the above statement to Cjan....



Racquelle -> RE: Cunnilingus - are you converted? (7/16/2008 2:02:57 AM)

I would say only about one in ten male lovers has been particularly adept at it, and about half of female lovers, and mind you, I have little trouble giving direction - but at a certain point, I just want to look down and say "I know you heard me tell you not to __________, and when I clamped my hand over that spot, it wasn't your queue to try to lick my hand out of the way."  I had so many years of mediocre that I was convinced it would never lead to anything more than a puss full of drool.  Ah, but "Big B" changed it all - he was intuitive, interested, had stamina, and was himself a bit stoned - and had taken such lovely direction from his last lover that I needed to say almost nothing - he took the uncontrollable yelps, whines and moans as a sign he was doing well.  It brings to mind a couple of things.

1.  Many men report that their best blow jobs involve a great deal more than a tongue swirling around the head of the penis - lips, tongue, hands all play a wonderful part in a well orchestrated blow job as can unexpected things like running soft breasts with stiff nipples up and down his thighs, wrapping strands of silky hair around his cock or letting it tickle down onto his balls, and accompanying anal or peritoneal touching.  This is the same with great pussy eating.  It doesn't begin and end with incessant diddling of one square milimeter of clit-tip - which will grow incredibly annoying to most women in about 6 seconds.

2.  Arousal, for me, must always begin between the ears.  If you haven't flirted with me, pleased me, relaxed me, gotten me into a state of delicious anticipation with your words and actions before you touch my body, I will almost certainly not be able to come from any method.  I can get myself into this state as well, and think it is best when we are all whipping eachother up into a frenzy - keying off one another, and each of us is creating our own pleasure and sharing in the creation of the other's...but damnit, if you aren't clever enough to participate in the mental stimuli, then at least shaddup, keep at your task, and stop distracting me while I lie back and fantasize you are someone else.



TreasureKY -> RE: Cunnilingus - are you converted? (7/16/2008 5:12:39 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Racquelle

... think it is best when we are all whipping each other up into a frenzy - keying off one another, and each of us is creating our own pleasure and sharing in the creation of the other's ...


Amen.  [;)]



atursvcMaam -> RE: Cunnilingus - are you converted? (7/16/2008 7:16:08 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: patwi

quote:

ORIGINAL: NeedingMore220

quote:

ORIGINAL: patwi

I don't enjoy it actually. I never have. I don't think it's a matter of technique, rather than a matter of me not being comfortable with a man having such an up close view of me. I tense up and find myself trying to hurry him along so I can quit thinking "omg I look fat my thighs are so huge i bet they're jiggling omg my ass cheeks are probably taking up so much room what does my stomach look like from down there..."


I understand your insecurities, but I bet there are very few men who are thinking those kinds of things when he's between your thighs trying to please you and enjoying you.  Self-acceptance can make the difference between so/so sex to smokin' hot sex.



*laugh* How about it, men? Have you ever gone down on a woman, then got a good close look at the thighs/belly/ass/whatever and thought "Well that's not entirely pleasant.  I think i've changed my mind."



i have been with a Lady who had, and expressed, exactly those concerns.  While i found Her quite attractive, i was concerned because She was overly tense that i would find Her unappealing.  By the time that i had lightly massaged, licked, and kissed Her belly, thighs and bottom with a lingering appreciation, She had relaxed and realized that i was not going to change my mind.
  personally, if a Lady is willing to share that part of Herself with me, i am, most likely, going to say "Thank You so very much."  The big secret is that i, at that point, will have already decided that You are OK (to put it mildly) meaty thighs, ample ass cheeks, curvy belly and all.




myotherself -> RE: Cunnilingus - are you converted? (7/16/2008 8:03:19 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lucylastic

quote:

ORIGINAL: myotherself
I'm MUCH happier with his hand inside me huntin' for the that yummy g-spot...[:D]

I Love that thought, that works tooo, LOL and thats what matters, eh?
Lucy



HELL yes![sm=insane.gif][sm=mop.gif]



opposingtwilight -> RE: Cunnilingus - are you converted? (7/16/2008 8:08:56 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Racquelle

... and when I clamped my hand over that spot, it wasn't your queue to try to lick my hand out of the way.



That pretty much describes how I feel about the WHOLE experience. I want no part of it and nothing irritates me more than being told, "Oh, you've just never had it done right then." Or when he tries to do it anyway to prove his point ...

I guess I'll never be a convert. :)



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