RE: Fetish wear (Full Version)

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KneelingSilently -> RE: Fetish wear (7/14/2008 7:41:01 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsStarlett

I think I look HOT in my pics. 



After careful review I second that. :)



LadyPact -> RE: Fetish wear (7/14/2008 9:14:11 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Morsigil
There are many reasons people choose particular pictures of themselves for this site, and just because they choose one of themselves in a sexy get-up doesn't mean they're here for sex. They could just like the picture because it makes them feel sexy when they look at it. Maybe it reinforces their world-view in a way that you aren't privvy. Further, who says they put any effort into dressing up for a picture for this site? Most of the pro dommes have professionally done fetish pictures for their websites and use them here as well. Others simply get them done during play, at parties, by friends or lovers.

Along with MmeGigs response, I found this to be wonderful.  Actually, one of the best pics of Me that was ever put up on CM, is the picture that is on My sub's profile.  The other is on My husband's.



MistressSassy66 -> RE: Fetish wear (7/14/2008 9:50:35 PM)

Maybe its because they just look sexy in
everything they wear.Perhaps they have a large
chest and cleavage is a way of life.
Maybe they want to show their beauty and make it
clear they are not looking for sex,they just want friends.
Maybe they add not looking for sex because there are
hundreds of men looking to get laid.Even if you do
add not looking for sex they still send emails asking.
No matter what is worn some guy will find it sexy.
Why should We(women) have to dress down because some guys
cant control their hard-on.It is just like blaming the girl for what she wore when
she was raped.

Dont hate Us because We are beautiful and are not afraid to show it.



LaMistressa -> RE: Fetish wear (7/14/2008 10:04:12 PM)

One of my very favorite things about fetishwear is that it makes the wearer look hot, and it highlights the features that the wearer likes best. I enjoy seeing a variety of different sizes and types of people in corsets, hobble skirts, catsuits, leather, latex, pvc - does that mean I'm going to have sex with all of them? No! Some of us enjoy dressing (and showing off our wardrobes) for the sheer pleasure of dressing.




StaceyTheBitch -> RE: Fetish wear (7/14/2008 10:33:17 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Jaded2005

I have a question for the ages. Why is it alot of the photos show women in the sexy outfits and revealing poses, yet in the profile they say "no sex". Maybe I'm misunderstanding something but why show something that isn't offered? I would equate that to 'bait and switch'. Offering chocolates and receiving a saltlick....LOL  Or the one I love is "This lifestyle isn't about sex".......really?? Why put all that effort in dressing for a picture when that isn't the intention?

I've received mail from guys with all kinds of fetishes and kink fantasies and many of these guys have two things in common.
One: They want their Domme to be beautiful/sexy and to dress in a beautiful/sexy outfit.
Two: They don't require sex in order to have their fantasy/fetish fulfilled

How is it most professional Dominatrices dress sexy and give no sex yet they get more business then they can handle? If it were bait and switch or only about sex don't you think the guys would stop showing up?

Many guys with non sexual fantasies still want the sexual look in a Domme.
.......

Who defines sexy? Some guys call the girl-next-door look sexy and are turned off by the leather and whip look.
Your sexy is not everyone else's sexy.
.....

The short answer to your question of "why?" is.......because we can.



HeavansKeeper -> RE: Fetish wear (7/14/2008 10:34:11 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Jaded2005

I have a question for the ages. Why is it alot of the photos show women in the sexy outfits and revealing poses, yet in the profile they say "no sex". Maybe I'm misunderstanding something but why show something that isn't offered? I would equate that to 'bait and switch'. Offering chocolates and receiving a saltlick....LOL  Or the one I love is "This lifestyle isn't about sex".......really?? Why put all that effort in dressing for a picture when that isn't the intention?


It probably has a lot to do with the focus and effort of a man with a hard on vs. the tired sleepiness of a man who just lost his (the right way).  The clothes are the tease.  Think of it like an added cuck-kink without the actuality of it.  She looks sooooooooooooo slutty in her fem-domme fetish wear, but won't even touch your rod with anything less than the crop.  Using sexy clothing adds to the want factor.  Want to please her, want to make her proud, and with that pink latex skirt, WANT WANT WANT - PANT-PANT-PANT!



subcain -> RE: Fetish wear (7/15/2008 12:24:29 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: DianeB

Why can't a woman wear sexy outfits and not want sex? The outfits mean nothing...Too many guys think with the wrong head before they speak/type...


Diane


quote:

ORIGINAL: Dave Chappelle

"I know all girls that dress like sluts aren't sluts, but I just have a problem with false advertising.
It would be like me, a comedian, dressing as a police officer. Then, when some young lady needs help, lookin at her and saying..
WHAT!!!!,  just because I'm dressed like a police officer, that automatically makes me a police officer!!!!"

Dave Chappelle


Reminded me of that quote hehe.
I guess in this case it would translate just because a woman has some sexy\kink outfit on in no way means she wants sex but on the other hand you cant blame someone for mistakenly asuming she does

tbh it is more of a power trip if something i cant have but teribly want is on display, makes things more fun for both parties



DelilahDeb -> RE: Fetish wear (7/15/2008 12:58:05 AM)

OP: Look, I don't know about you, but the 98% of photos taken of me look like hell. No matter what I'm wearing, or not. I'm sort of anti-photogenic. Having some self-esteem, this fucking annoys me.

So the photos I choose to post are those that reasonably resemble me without making me look like a moron, like a mouth-breather, like a blimp. I spend a lot of time starkers most days, in or out of scene, because I am comfortable that way. Wearing my skin. Guess what? Like almost all American males (and most females, let's be blunt), you believe that skin equals sex (damn those tight-assed Puritans!). It's a cultural sickness that sickens the Bible Belt in particular. Well, skin does not equal sex. Dressing attractively, and preferring to post an attractive image of myself, does not make me or anyone else here a whore, any more than a man wearing an Armani suit and Rolex to the opera and parking his BMW in the alley three blocks away to save the cost of valet service is "asking for it" when three muggers take him down and strip him. Get a grip.

If you bother with a dictionary, you will find that every practice common to the BDSM & fetish community: sadism, masochism, fetish, etc., is defined as an activity from which the person practicing it derives emotional, sexual satisfaction. Whether or not any genital contact occurs, whether or not any orgasms occur, whether or not any skin-to-skin contact of any sort occurs!

Really, we do this because we like it. By MUTUAL CONSENT. After negotiation, and agreement, with safe words. With people we like. And, y'know, right now, I don't like you.

quote:

MaestraDommelyUNIVERSA commands you:
1. Strip naked.
2. Open mouth.
3. Insert foot.
4. Seize shin.
5. Pull hard into your throat.
6. Stand still.

Whereupon she seizes her buggy whip and taser, and begins to circle you…slowly, ominously, and in total silence.


Lady Delilah Deb



MsStarlett -> RE: Fetish wear (7/15/2008 4:34:29 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: KneelingSilently

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsStarlett

I think I look HOT in my pics. 



After careful review I second that. :)



Thank you.  See?  It works.

HeavensKeeper hit the nail on the head.  The primal desire for the Domme is part of the dynamic. 

Someone on another thread, some time ago, was asking about why FemDoms only want the good looking subs.  The prevailing answer was "Because if you've got a line of people begging for your attention, it is human nature to pick out the ones you find attractive first."  Mind you, LOOKS are not everything... but it IS the first thing anyone notices.  You can't just suddenly know what another person's character is.

The question turns... Given a choice, would you select the Domme you find attractive (Big, thin, tall, short, red-head or blond?) wearing a hot out fit over the next one that you personally find less attractive in dirty sweats?  You bet your sweet boots you would!  You may find out later that the one in Sweats is the far better Dom... but at first glance, one follows their gut... which is guided by the eye.





TNstepsout -> RE: Fetish wear (7/15/2008 5:15:49 AM)

First of all the concept that dressing sexy is like displaying merchandise is distorted.  If your friend has a very nice sports car and he enjoys driving it around, does that mean he wants YOU to drive it?  If he said "hey wanna take a ride in my new sports car?" does that mean he wants you to drive it? It is not a bait and switch because there is nothing for sale here.  



HeavansKeeper -> RE: Fetish wear (7/15/2008 5:31:31 AM)

TN,

Can't it be both?  Some women dress sexy to feel good (and sexy =P)  some women dress sexy for attention.  I'm sure there are other reasons, but those are the two reasons I dress sexy when the moon strikes. 



MsStarlett -> RE: Fetish wear (7/15/2008 6:22:36 AM)

No, TN - he doesn't want you to drive his car... he wants you to ENVY his car.  To desire what cannot be had.



MistressMiracle -> RE: Fetish wear (7/15/2008 7:13:48 AM)

Well said, MsStarlett :)   BRAVO



HarryVanWinkle -> RE: Fetish wear (7/15/2008 8:18:04 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: KneelingSilently

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsStarlett

I think I look HOT in my pics. 



After careful review I second that. :)



I third it.



HeavansKeeper -> RE: Fetish wear (7/15/2008 8:23:16 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: HarryVanWinkle

quote:

ORIGINAL: KneelingSilently

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsStarlett

I think I look HOT in my pics. 



After careful review I second that. :)



I third it.


We have a proposal and a second, if we're using Roberts' rules of order we'd put it to a majority vote now before adopting it as a CM bylaw.



Wheldrake -> RE: Fetish wear (7/15/2008 11:18:30 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsStarlett

The question turns... Given a choice, would you select the Domme you find attractive (Big, thin, tall, short, red-head or blond?) wearing a hot out fit over the next one that you personally find less attractive in dirty sweats?  You bet your sweet boots you would!  You may find out later that the one in Sweats is the far better Dom... but at first glance, one follows their gut... which is guided by the eye.



Actually, and with apologies for being difficult, I instinctively take dominants a bit more seriously when they're NOT kitted out in fetish gear or other ostentatiously sexy outfits. This is a bad, poorly founded mental habit of mine, since many capable dominants clearly do enjoy dressing up. However, my subconscious mind tends to see the leather catsuit or the skimpy lingerie, or whatever, and assume that the woman wearing it is either pandering to fairly banal fantasies or trying to conform to a stereotype of what a Dominant Goddess should look like. No matter how much I tell my subconscious to stop doing this, a woman in plain, comfortable clothes somehow comes across as just slightly more authentic in her dominance. But this only applies to first impressions - beyond that, what she says and does is much more important than what she looks like.



LadyPact -> RE: Fetish wear (7/15/2008 11:23:39 AM)

Point of Order.



Venatrix -> RE: Fetish wear (7/15/2008 11:47:41 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Wheldrake

. . . I instinctively take dominants a bit more seriously when they're NOT kitted out in fetish gear or other ostentatiously sexy outfits. . . .



You can't help how you see things, but the domina is going to wear what she likes.  I try to find a common ground with my sub, to see if we can both be aesthetically pleased.



Wheldrake -> RE: Fetish wear (7/15/2008 12:23:19 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Venatrix

quote:

ORIGINAL: Wheldrake

. . . I instinctively take dominants a bit more seriously when they're NOT kitted out in fetish gear or other ostentatiously sexy outfits. . . .



You can't help how you see things, but the domina is going to wear what she likes.  I try to find a common ground with my sub, to see if we can both be aesthetically pleased.


Oh, absolutely! I wouldn't dream of telling my Mistress, or anyone else for that matter, what they should or shouldn't be wearing. I just wanted to make the point that Ms. Starlett's statement that male submissives would naturally prefer a dominant woman "wearing a hot outfit", which sounded dangerously like a sweeping generalisation, wasn't applicable to ALL of us slaveboys.



Venatrix -> RE: Fetish wear (7/15/2008 12:41:05 PM)

Generalisations never do apply to everyone; that's why they're called "generalisations." [:D]



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