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Missokyst -> RE: ~~The Online Equivalent of a Cock Block~~ (7/16/2008 2:34:41 PM)
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In an odd way my group has been affected by this sort of stuff.
Back when I started participating in munches, I found that I wished to chat more than what was acceptable in our list. A group of five of us loved talking about bdsm, munches, toys, what nots and found it best to do it online in the hope we could inspire people to join in.
We were told, take it offline.
So, I created a separate group online for people who enjoyed chat and interaction.
We began with 5, it grew to 27, before too long we had 95 and.. a VERY negative reaction from the initial group.
What started as an honest desire for more chat became to them, an insult. As if we were talking badly about them behind their back in other groups. In truth, we didn't care what they did. I ended up creating another munch group and locating it 70 miles north of the original. I didn't wish to cut into their activity. But they saw it as a rivalry. It was out and out war for a few years. Well.. war from their end. I was pretty content in my own group. We had an active membership and could pull in 40 people at a sitting. And a LOT of discussion, chat, banter went on in online forums.
Eventually I moved some of my people back down to my own area (we had a coupe happen with my other co-owner and he took my created list). I started with 20, then it grew. And people took their time joining us. Why? Because they had heard bad things about the kind of people we were.
Nonsense! My people are FABULOUS! They are friendly, chatty, gregarious, welcoming and fun. The reputation as bitches was something which was created and spread by the first original group. We are the same people we always were. Friendly, chatty, ect. Nothing has changed for us.
But battling that stigma of people branding you as a bitch, bad, ect, simply because we didn't want to be limited to one way, has kept us from growing the way we might have, or as quickly.
Right now despite the memory of that stigma, my group is the most active of any I have seen.
If people do say bad things about you, the challenge is to rise above it. Don't jump into the negativity of their game. Ride it out and eventually your actions will win many over.
My list ROCKS! And, a surprising number from the old now merged first list, are now among my members.
Kyst
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