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When looking for a master... - 7/22/2008 4:34:31 AM   
slaveowner69


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Joined: 7/21/2008
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When looking through profiles for a master, what usually catches your eye?/in what ways can I improve my profile?
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RE: When looking for a master... - 7/22/2008 4:39:03 AM   
naturalsin


Posts: 92
Joined: 6/24/2008
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when i look at profiles on here i tend to look at age, experience, what He is in search of, how tall, the actual 'CM id) i steer clear of the whole 'im IT' sounding names, poetry is out for me, any poetry and i move on, same with quotes, a Master showing a lil sense of humor on His profile to me is a good sign too...

just my opinion.

Good luck on the sight!

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RE: When looking for a master... - 7/22/2008 4:44:01 AM   
seababy


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RE: When looking for a master... - 7/22/2008 4:50:05 AM   
katie978


Posts: 352
Joined: 7/21/2007
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"slaveowner69"
One thing that catches my eye is the name. A rose, by any other name, would smell as sweet. However, if the rose was named 12inchcockmasterwantstofuckyouwith, well...I wouldn't take the time to smell it. If you don't pick a name that means something to you, pick a name that's painfully anonymous (like mine). Also, with a name like yours, you better expect to pay up. Maybe you chose 69 because you're still juvenile and enjoy typing that number into your calculator in pre-algebra. However, due to your name, I would expect that I would be receiving as often as I was giving.

"no bullshit. i DON'T play games, neither should u. "
Another thing that catches my eye in profiles is proper grammar. Like many others of the forums here, I get a little moist for proper punctuation. Internet abbreviations annoy me, and if someone insists on using them in conversation, eventually I will grow annoyed and start to grow contemptuous. If someone wants to get to know me, at least they can take the time to type a few extra letters.

"preferably live in. as a slave, your new clothes will be a leash and collar. i will tie u up when i am go out. if i'm on vacation u may be allowed to go with me, otherwise i will lend u to a friend. "
  Something that catches my eye is when a dom talks about their interests outside of BDSM. Although it's easy to rave on and on about their fantasy slave, most of the time I spend with my dom is used participating in normal, non-BDSM activities. Particularly with younger BDSMers (although not exclusively), people like to pretend that they can live in the fantasy of kink literally 24-7. Few people can actually manage this. My profile says I like to play mini-golf. I think that says a lot more about me than 4 pages of an erotic fantasy about how I want to be tied to a bed.

On a similar note, I look for someone who is realistic. I don't know any 25-year-old who can afford to keep a girl at home all the time. Do you expect your slave to work? That's not reflected in your posting. Do you live alone? If you live with roommates/your parents, how is she supposed to be naked all the time? Lending her to your friends: great fantasy, probably not that good of an idea. Although there are many on the forums who have been lent out, it frequently leads to emotional issues. What if your friend abuses her? What if she likes your friend better than you? Are you willing to risk your property so nonchalantly?

"Looking for 18-29 f slave. message me and we will discuss all the terms or email me at slutlover at ymail.com"

Finally, the last thing that caught my eye was  someone with similar relationship goals. I believe that many people here are looking for a relationship, like boyfriend/girlfriend, with a D/s dynamic. Significantly fewer are looking for a TPE 24-7 relationship. I think this may be another issue where fantasy has clouded over reality.

< Message edited by katie978 -- 7/22/2008 4:51:14 AM >


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RE: When looking for a master... - 7/22/2008 4:55:42 AM   
simpleplan2


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I'm with katie...first thing is the name.  Since I don't identify as a slave, pretty much anyone with "slaveowner" in his name, I pass by...sure, I may miss some good ones that way but I figure we've got different goals from the start.  Proper grammar to me is also important.  Ok, I'll admit it.  I'm anal about it.  It doesn't take much longer to type "you" than it does "u".  Of course, I realize that younger people tend to use IMspeak due to cell phones and messaging so it's not a make or break with me.  The other is what katie said.  Not many people can afford to keep a slave who doesn't contribute.  If she's tied up all the time, who's cleaning the house...cooking the meals...laundry?  In fact, who's the slave?

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RE: When looking for a master... - 7/22/2008 6:29:19 AM   
sambamanslilgirl


Posts: 10926
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From: Chicago, IL
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also agreeing with katie

i don't like names such as masteroftheentireworld or domintatingurass - i usually look for something unique and personal to that person. also names like whitemaster4blkslave is a major turnoff for me.

i'm a grammar correction junkie especially since i'm a writer (and a prefectionist) so if someone misspells dominate for dominant or ur/u for you're or your/you, i simply pass by their profile. try to imagine them using that chatspeak in person with you *shivers*  you would need a translator for your conversations. improper grammar is pet peeve of mine.

distance and age is another thing i look at. if you're on the other side of the pond or more than 5yrs younger than me, i wouldn't be interested. i love where i live since that's where my fun, rock-n-roll job is and i could never see someone who's 23 or 25 a dominant. it's about compatiblity however i come with attachments (my girls) and i have to think what's best for them ...most men don't want a woman with dependents especially younger men. they (dominants) feel their needs won't come first. as a mother, i'll always choose mine over them - mine and their needs will come first then whomever else second.

if the profile has nothing written - i simply ignore it. 

if the profile/person's solely interest is BDSM 24/7/365 that's all i live for type - i ignore it. there's more to life than living the fantasy every single day. i would get bored. i have life - i'm a mom, school volunteer, band/music critic, radio personality, etc etc as well as interests and hobbies. having a kink side is only a tiny sliver of me but not all of me. i do have to function in the real world ...put food on the table and pay bills like everyone else.  also i look for similar interests from the person too.



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RE: When looking for a master... - 7/22/2008 7:06:17 AM   
DesFIP


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He's pulled his profile.

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RE: When looking for a master... - 7/22/2008 7:58:40 AM   
greenearth21


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What he's looking for and what I have to offer.  Attraction, demeanor and what their profile is really made of.

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RE: When looking for a master... - 7/22/2008 4:14:11 PM   
Daes


Posts: 246
Joined: 4/20/2007
From: Diamond Bar, SoCal
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If I were you, Id take a look at other Doms profiles. There are some cheesy ones out there - dont go down that route XP

Try not to make yourself off as some advertisement, or write things just cause it suits the site - just be honest about who you are and what you want. How else are you to find what youre looking for?

Mines pretty detailed, I keep it that way cause it tells me who is Actually interested in my thoughts and feelings towards things. When I reply to profiles that catch my eye is normally because I felt they were true to who they were, what they wanted, and I felt that they were compatible with me. If the person doesnt have a picture, and doesnt have a profile then I wont bother with it. When someone puts Effort in trying to express who they are, I look at it as someone that wants to be taken seriously that knows what they want and desire. Grammar and name come into play as well.


< Message edited by Daes -- 7/22/2008 4:15:19 PM >


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RE: When looking for a master... - 7/22/2008 5:34:18 PM   
StrongSpirit


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I myself avoid using the term expert for BDSM things.    There are things that I know and things that I don't know.  Moreover, many of the things I know work only for certain people.  While some might love getting hit on their nipples, others may hate it.  Experience is not all it's cracked up to be.  

Besides, I am not a pleasure machine for your amusement.  I am not looking for a play partner.  I am looking for a relationship.  Anyone that insists on an 'expert' is looking for the wrong thing in my opinion.  You need to find someone whose personality clicks, not someone with enough experience.   If a vanilla man did the same thing, he would end up marrying a prostitute.

Kinky-ness is important.  Desire is important.  Personality is important.  Those things are difficult, if not impossible to change.

Skill is something you can learn.

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RE: When looking for a master... - 7/23/2008 5:20:51 AM   
chamberqueen


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Joined: 10/25/2007
From: Kalamazoo, MI
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When I was looking for a Master I preferred profiles with photos.  I liked seeing other interests checked besides BDSM so that I could get a better all around picture of the person.  I liked profiles that showed that the Master had something to offer, not just a list of what he wanted to take.  

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RE: When looking for a master... - 7/23/2008 7:26:30 AM   
lally3


Posts: 595
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im with katie too - just to add, anyone who says - im looking for 'The One' gets that 'nee naw' buzzer sound.

its corny and when you notice on their profile that theyve been looking for 'The One' for over five years its pretty evident that fantasy has taken over to morbid proportions.

editing to add:  using the name slaveowner suggests that your a D not an s, which then suggests that youre very very new to all of this - so if youre still there after pulling your profile i wish you lots of luck.

< Message edited by lally3 -- 7/23/2008 7:29:40 AM >


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RE: When looking for a master... - 7/23/2008 8:25:58 AM   
nashvilledomLTR


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quote:

ORIGINAL: simpleplan2
If she's tied up all the time, who's cleaning the house...cooking the meals...laundry?  In fact, who's the slave?


Exactly

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RE: When looking for a master... - 7/23/2008 10:24:14 AM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
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From: Apple County NY
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Not to mention that he hasn;t thought about her safety at all. She's left tied up for hours, no blood flow, no way to escape if the house catches on fire, no way to get a tissue if she catches a cold, or to get to the bathroom if she's nauseous.

Fantasy is a major turn off.

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Cynical and proud of it!


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RE: When looking for a master... - 7/24/2008 6:42:38 PM   
arc83


Posts: 5
Joined: 6/8/2008
From: Toronto, Ontario
Status: offline
I steer clear of Dommes that brag too much in their profile -

"I'm the bestest Mistress evar and you must prove ur worth why you should be able to join my flock of slaves!!1!!" - yuck.

Seriously, that just makes me think "Get real lady"

Too many conditions as well - "Don't bother even think of contemplating of messaging me if you're this or that..." - that just makes you look bitter and cranky.

Really, I like the profiles that give an indication of the person behind the webpage, and that they have an interesting personality - ya know, a bit just like a regular vanilla dating profile in a sense.

As others have said, grammar and spelling ARE important. You wouldn't write "u" or "hawt" on a resume would you?

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RE: When looking for a master... - 7/24/2008 9:33:01 PM   
Quivver


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well HELL, no profile now ... I guess I'll have to check back to see the new improved version!

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RE: When looking for a master... - 7/24/2008 10:02:27 PM   
Leatherist


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I guess "SuperYuppieDom" is out then, bugger.

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RE: When looking for a master... - 7/25/2008 11:11:21 AM   
ButchFemDomCpl


Posts: 31
Joined: 4/12/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: lally3

its corny and when you notice on their profile that theyve been looking for 'The One' for over five years its pretty evident that fantasy has taken over to morbid proportions.



Wow..what made you think this?   I searched for nearly 4 and a half years to find the right Butch for Me. Although I play with My Butch as a FemDomCpl, it took a great deal of time to find a Butch that fit Me. There was no "fantasy" there, it was simply a search that took a great deal of time.  As a Lesbian Leather Femme, it's quite rare to find Butches or Bois online.  Too often, men have NO idea that "boi" is a female-born bottom from a Lesbian point of view, then post themselves as a "boi."     Boi Jai is known to the people in My house as Sir Jai, but slave to Me. 

Femme
BFDC

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RE: When looking for a master... - 7/25/2008 12:43:52 PM   
SlaveRayleene


Posts: 22
Joined: 1/9/2008
Status: offline
Every Dom and every sub has different needs. Just be homest in what you have to offer.

As a sub, singletails get my attention so an experienced singletail Master from the UK would be my ideal. And if he was interested in going to BDSM clubs....even better, but thats just me.

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RE: When looking for a master... - 7/25/2008 5:23:34 PM   
ProtagonistLily


Posts: 1222
Joined: 12/27/2004
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quote:

When looking through profiles for a master, what usually catches your eye?/in what ways can I improve my profile?


I was looking for local only. Too much bullshit to weed through with people who string others along just for their own cheap thrills. I wasn't looking for some emotional roller coaster ride, I was looking for the real deal. I was lucky, I found him where I lived.

Be honest. Don't sell yourself short at all. Don't put on "Slave" face and don't pretend to be something you aren't. Anyone who's looking for a doormat is probably not worth the trouble. 

Also, you would do yourself a world of favor if you investigated your locale to see if there is a BDSM/Kink/Leather organization within a reasonable distance, depending on where you are, that could be up to 100 miles away. Join it. It increases your odds of meeting someone 100%. And while you are looking for Dom/me Right, you can learn things, meet others, gain friends, go to a demo or two and find out what other people are doing. It may break the fantasies to some degree, but it will root you firmly in reality and that's a good thing.

Best of luck,

PL

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(in reply to SlaveRayleene)
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