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Subs/slaves submission a gift? - 7/29/2008 12:45:32 PM   
MstrDennynSlave


Posts: 181
Joined: 9/6/2007
Status: offline 		Master and I were talking this morning. We both agree that submission is a gift. I know from reading on here that it is just about equally divided in those saying it is a gift and those saying it is not a gift. Master and I came to the conclusion that a lot of people, (we may be wrong about this), think of a gift as a present. Something you give for Christmas, birthdays, what have you. We believe that a gift is something that you give to someone else because you want to, not because you have to. Our question is this: If you dont believe submission is a gift, why dont you think it is? Vice versa, if you think it is a gift, why do you think this way? We welcome comments from any and all. Thank you for your time.
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RE: Subs/slaves submission a gift? - 7/29/2008 12:52:53 PM   
katie978


Posts: 352
Joined: 7/21/2007
Status: offline 		  I'll admit, I'm new to the whole linking thing, but I'll give it a shot.

My thoughts on the "gift" of submission
http://www.collarchat.com/m_17487/mpage_1/key_Submission%252CGift/tm.htm#17487

What I take away from the "gift" dispute
http://www.collarchat.com/m_729957/mpage_1/key_Submission%252CGift/tm.htm#729957

"Submission is a Gift"
http://www.collarchat.com/m_1180353/mpage_1/key_Submission%252CGift/tm.htm#1180353

Why do so many view submission as a gift?
http://www.collarchat.com/m_135667/mpage_1/key_Submission%252CGift/tm.htm#135667

Submission is a gift!!!???
http://www.collarchat.com/m_417971/mpage_1/key_Submission%252CGift/tm.htm#417971


I doubt anyone here believes that because submission can't be wrapped up and placed in a shiny box that it can't technically qualify as a "gift". To be honest, I'm not the overly romantic type, and I tend to skim over arguements about word usage, so I don't really care what people think one way or another...I'm just saving someone else the trouble of sending the links.

And these are just the first 5 of probable hundreds. Happy reading!

< Message edited by katie978 -- 7/29/2008 12:53:31 PM >

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RE: Subs/slaves submission a gift? - 7/29/2008 12:55:43 PM   
Sub4You4UKOnly


Posts: 716
Joined: 7/6/2008
From: Mooland
Status: offline 		Submission isn't a gift, anyone can submit, you just need to have the right state of mind to do it

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RE: Subs/slaves submission a gift? - 7/29/2008 1:12:49 PM   
Missokyst


Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline 		do you take back gifts when the frienship ends?  <g>  If so.. I am sure there is a Red Kitchen Aid in my future!


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RE: Subs/slaves submission a gift? - 7/29/2008 1:13:23 PM   
dreamerdreaming


Posts: 2839
Status: offline 		My slave is the gift, to Me.
 
 Submit and obey, attend to My needs and requirements, perform the duties I assign according to My instructions... those are all things he does for me, and for his own fulfillment. 
 
he is the gift.
 
Semantics maybe, but that's how I think of it. I am very thankful for the gift of him. Every day I do My best to be worthy of such a fine slaveboy.

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RE: Subs/slaves submission a gift? - 7/29/2008 1:34:03 PM   
Mercnbeth


Posts: 11766
Status: offline
~ Fast Reply ~
 
Submission is a curse, unless/until you give it to someone who you can trust understands its worth, and appreciates its value.

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RE: Subs/slaves submission a gift? - 7/29/2008 1:40:36 PM   
windchymes


Posts: 9410
Joined: 4/18/2005
Status: offline 		Perhaps "gift" is in the eye of the recipient?

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RE: Subs/slaves submission a gift? - 7/29/2008 1:46:17 PM   
bardtothebone


Posts: 840
Joined: 9/21/2006
From: Central CA.
Status: offline 		Dreamer's right -- the presence of a sub / slave in your life is a gift that
goes on giving - Every single day. Their submission is a wonderful bonus.

The Bard

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RE: Subs/slaves submission a gift? - 7/29/2008 2:10:06 PM   
sambamanslilgirl


Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline 		as far as Daddy and i are concerned, my submission was a gift to Him ...and that's the only opinion which matters to us.

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RE: Subs/slaves submission a gift? - 7/29/2008 2:32:09 PM   
MstrDennynSlave


Posts: 181
Joined: 9/6/2007
Status: offline 		We've gotten some good responses. Thank you to all that responded.

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RE: Subs/slaves submission a gift? - 7/29/2008 2:50:47 PM   
lally3


Posts: 595
Joined: 3/4/2008
Status: offline 		i had a D write to me about the gift of submission and i actually felt a little nauseated - i think because for a complete stranger to assume that my submission would be a gift to him was asserting that it almost didnt matter what his input amounted to - my 'gift' to him would make all things possible.

the 'gift' of submission does not stand alone - it is directly proportionate to the amount of intelligent, intuitive Dominance taking place - for me it isnt a gift so much as a symbiosis - i only give when i feel the recipient gives back - a gift is something you give selflessly - i dont give selflessly.

so i dont see it as a gift, partly because what i give into a D/s relationship is expected and required anyway and partly because the part i play is one part of a whole that is inspired by need and want, my need and want to fulfill his need and want... symbiosis.

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RE: Subs/slaves submission a gift? - 7/29/2008 2:56:23 PM   
softness


Posts: 2918
Joined: 8/1/2006
From: Leeds, UK
Status: offline 		For me ... calling it a gift would be similar to what me and my brother do at Christmas .. which is spend money on something for ourselves, wrap it, exchange it prior to the big day ... and then make out that we came up with the gift on our own all along ... or when my ex-girlfriend gave me a Television for my birthday, so she could watch the football when she was at my house. None of the characteristics of gifting are things are see in my submission to DV -

I don't think of it as a gift or a present ... because it is something selfish, I have to do it in order to be happy myself. Even though my selfishness has manifested itself in what seems, and superficially is, very selfless behaviour - ultimately it is my happiness being served. Politically Incorrect as the phrase is ... it would make me an indian giver to call my submission a gift.

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RE: Subs/slaves submission a gift? - 7/29/2008 3:02:40 PM   
mbes


Posts: 465
Joined: 12/14/2006
Status: offline 		What I do, I do because it fulfills a need of mine.
Hopefully he wakes up in the mornings (at least some mornings!) thinking that my presence in his life is a "gift from the gods", but I just don't see fulfilling myself as my gift to him.
I do happen to find his presence in my life to be one of those gifts from the gods, though.

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RE: Subs/slaves submission a gift? - 7/29/2008 3:05:20 PM   
opposingtwilight


Posts: 684
Joined: 6/13/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth

~ Fast Reply ~
 
Submission is a curse, unless/until you give it to someone who you can trust understands its worth, and appreciates its value.


Exactly!

When you don't have that person in your life, having a submissive nature can get you into so much trouble. Submission is not a gift. I have a submissive nature. Does that make my very nature a gift? Well, but wait ... If I give it to another submissive, its a pretty crummy gift!


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RE: Subs/slaves submission a gift? - 7/29/2008 3:10:30 PM   
akisha


Posts: 2071
Joined: 6/25/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Sub4You4UKOnly

Submission isn't a gift, anyone can submit, you just need to have the right state of mind to do it


Ditto for me. IMHO the "submission is a gift" line is a bunch of Bull Honky!!!

submission is something you choose to give in return for the domination from another. It's an trade of commodity if you will.

gift my butt.

Now in my submission if i give up something or offer something of myself that is hard for me to do because of one reason or another, then maybe, i might say that part of my submission to my Master is a gift to him.

But OP, really, call it what ever the heck you want. Do what ever works in your relationship. Some will agree with you and some won't. The joys of a diversified people *S*

< Message edited by akisha -- 7/29/2008 3:11:56 PM >

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RE: Subs/slaves submission a gift? - 7/29/2008 3:47:20 PM   
lally3


Posts: 595
Joined: 3/4/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Sub4You4UKOnly

anyone can submit, you just need to have the right state of mind to do it


thats an oxymoron

to have the right state of mind is to be turned on by the twisted desire to do whatever is required - so i would argue that 'anyone' is a slight overstatement.



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RE: Subs/slaves submission a gift? - 7/29/2008 3:52:57 PM   
tenderplant


Posts: 15
Joined: 4/5/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth

~ Fast Reply ~
 
Submission is a curse, unless/until you give it to someone who you can trust understands its worth, and appreciates its value.

^5

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RE: Subs/slaves submission a gift? - 7/29/2008 3:53:30 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		Aw Katie, thanks :)

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RE: Subs/slaves submission a gift? - 7/29/2008 4:24:40 PM   
lally3


Posts: 595
Joined: 3/4/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth

~ Fast Reply ~
 
Submission is a curse, unless/until you give it to someone who you can trust understands its worth, and appreciates its value.


you know i was thinking this the other day and visa vis the gift thing (to avoid the thread jack theme) its relevant.

i decided the other day that im pissed off being a sub - im not hideous, i have a fun, happy, spontaneous personality - if i was a vanilla id have a partner, but as a sub im finding it hard.  i got all cross and dramatic about it and thought this:

as a submissive i must bend my will
i must defer my decisions
i must consider my actions
i must place trust into anothers hands
i must give when id rather take
i must kneel when id rather stand
i must stop when id rather continue
i must look down when id rather look up
i must be still when id rather move
i must be obedient when id much rather not
i must be respectful
i must be attentive
i must always be submissive
because to be any other way would make me miserable

so it is a curse - until you find someone that makes all of those things easy. 

being a drama queen a bit here, but you can blame mercnbeth for provoking me

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RE: Subs/slaves submission a gift? - 7/29/2008 4:25:25 PM   
BlackKnight


Posts: 767
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		Domination is the gift, gift of release: of your concerns; decision making; sexual, the gift of usefulness, the gift of protection,

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Life of Reason, Reason in Common Sense, Scribner's, 1905, page 284"
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