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RE: Obeying your Owner? - 7/31/2008 7:54:23 AM

CallaFirestormBW

Posts: 3651
Joined: 6/29/2008
Status: offline

There is a 'pat' phrase in our household, to be used for 'repetitive' requests or 'cranky' requests, because sometimes I'm on medication and forget that I've already asked for something, or my Darling has low blood sugar and gets irritable about something or other... "Yes, Ma'am".... that doesn't mean "I'll go do it right this very instant". In our household, it's perfectly ok to say "yes Ma'am", and then come back after we've had a meal (if Darling is crabby) or talk to Darling (if I've forgotten I already asked 3 times for something), or bring us a cup of tea with a "you seemed like you could really use this", then, when we're settled and thinking more clearly, say "Ma'am, I have a question about X..."

I don't know where people got the idea that the very -instant- an order is given, it is immediately carried out without a second's thought. Even at work, when I'm handed a project, I take a little time to read it over and make sure I understand what I'm being asked to do, before I start doing anything. Why would it be any different for a servant? If there is a question about something, ask, for heaven's sakes. "Gee, Master -- if I jump off this cliff, I won't be here to bring you breakfast in the morning... I think I must have misunderstood something. Did I understand you correctly?" (PS, If he still says "jump", it's -also- perfectly ok to say "Yes, Master", and then jump off the front porch step and hie one's behind right out the door and down the street to the bus depot or the women's/family shelter or the nearest church ... or police station, if you're so inclined.)

Taking the garbage out is a no-brainer... but being asked to do something dangerous -- if anyone says they'd do it without a moment's thought... I'm sorry, but that fish is -way- too big for me to swallow.

Calla Firestorm

_____________________________

***
Said to me recently: "Look, I know you're the "voice of reason"... but dammit, I LIKE being unreasonable!!!!"

"Your mind is more interested in the challenge of becoming than the challenge of doing." Jon Benson, Bodybuilder/Trainer

(in reply to Aileen1968)

Post #: 41

RE: Obeying your Owner? - 7/31/2008 11:06:29 AM

Dnomyar

Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline

Ladies don't play under the influence. Play under me.

(in reply to CallaFirestormBW)

Post #: 42

RE: Obeying your Owner? - 7/31/2008 12:31:16 PM

AquaticSub

Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: berdachegirl

When your Master or Mistress orders you to do something dangerous, or something with lasting effect, but also something you feel they normally wouldn't ask you to do, do you obey them? If they are drunk, inebriated or otherwise in an altered state, at what point do you say "Mistress wouldn't normally wish this of me, it must be the booze talking" ?

curious,
~cheryl~

Depends on what exactly the order was but in order to prevent booze orders, Valyraen and I have a series of tiered instructions should he get that drunk or aliens scramble his brain. If he wants to drive and he just downed a bucket of rum, it is my duty to him to stop him. If he wants me to do something that I know he wouldn't want and I know is too dangerous, I have no problem with refusing him until he is sober. When his head is clear, if he still desires it, I will obey provided it doesn't violate the other orders we have in place and, if required, I will accept my punishment.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to berdachegirl)

Post #: 43

RE: Obeying your Owner? - 7/31/2008 12:38:46 PM

submisty323

Posts: 9
Joined: 7/27/2008
Status: offline

It depends on the people...but you know your Mistress, so if it isn't safe...don't do it, you may both regret it if you do in the morning...and make sure you talk about it the next day...sober

(in reply to Aileen1968)

Post #: 44

RE: Obeying your Owner? - 7/31/2008 1:53:06 PM

ShiftedJewel

Posts: 2492
Joined: 12/2/2004
Status: offline

Honestly... I wouldn't normally demand candy, it's dangerous to me, but if I do then yeah, she better give it to me because it means my sugar is way to low and I'm gonna pass out otherwise. The same thing holds true if I order her to get me a shot of whiskey. We've discussed this and she knows that my sugar is dangerously high and the shot of whiskey will bring it down long enough to get me to the hospital. (I am not insulin dependent) She'll never see me drunk or stoned... you know... for obvious reasons. But when a diabetics sugar jumps or falls it's sometimes hard to tell what's going on with them. I would have to say that I would expect her to listen and do as she is told out of trust that I DO know what's going on. And she would have to be able to trust that I would never, under any circumstances, put her in harms way.

If it's alcohol talking? I don't listen to anyone then and don't expect her to either.

Jewel

Jewel

_____________________________

Don't ask, trust me, you won't like the answer... no one ever does.

(in reply to submisty323)

Post #: 45

RE: Obeying your Owner? - 7/31/2008 2:31:41 PM

camille65

Posts: 5746
Joined: 7/11/2007
From: Austin Texas
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Aileen1968

I like to play buzzed. Believe it or not, people don't always get so completely wacked that they can't control themselves. Sometimes a nice mellow buzz heightens everything just perfectly. Some people will feel comfortable playing like this. Some won't.

He had never seen me drink (I am sooooo not a drinking person, detest the taste of just about all alcohol) and so in Austin he bought me a 6 pack of Pyramid Apricot Ale... I got very giggly, he got very amused, I got more giggly and he began to tape me dance around the hotel room in my towel.

Then I flopped onto the bed and went to sleep, drunk off 3 beers.

He said next time I'm limited to 2 beers so that I can stay awake while he tortures me.

_____________________________

~Love your life! (It is the only one you'll get).

(in reply to Aileen1968)

Post #: 46

RE: Obeying your Owner? - 7/31/2008 2:45:41 PM

Aynne

Posts: 740
Joined: 1/25/2008
Status: offline

agreed. For god's sake, don't some of us like to dance when buzzed, or socialize, or any other fun activity? Before I was with Master and in a M/s relationship, I liked to go out, have some drinks, and have some wild buzzed sex, why is this any different? I do not mean out of control, I mean with someone you trust, it really is no big deal. Lighten up. If you can't play after dinner and a few drinks, maybe you need to re-assess your relationship. Not everyone gets out of control.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Aileen1968

I like to play buzzed. Believe it or not, people don't always get so completely wacked that they can't control themselves. Sometimes a nice mellow buzz heightens everything just perfectly. Some people will feel comfortable playing like this. Some won't.

_____________________________

*Yes I know I have no profile at this time...

I looked in your eyes
Without saying a word
I told you what I am
And I hoped that you heard

~Owned and Loved by Master Sifu~

*founder of I Love Lushy Inc.*

(in reply to Aileen1968)

Post #: 47

RE: Obeying your Owner? - 7/31/2008 2:50:23 PM

sfdrew

Posts: 124
Joined: 6/15/2007
Status: offline

If it seemed as though She were acting strange or obviously had Her judgment impared I would question the command for safety reasons. If She insisted on my obiedence I would obey Her. If the situation got too out of hand I always have my safe word. Part of being a slave to me is handing my life over to another person.

(in reply to RedMagic1)

Post #: 48

RE: Obeying your Owner? - 7/31/2008 6:04:36 PM

metalmiss

Posts: 341
Joined: 5/4/2005
From: Croydon, UK
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: berdachegirl

When your Master or Mistress orders you to do something dangerous, or something with lasting effect, but also something you feel they normally wouldn't ask you to do, do you obey them? If they are drunk, inebriated or otherwise in an altered state, at what point do you say "Mistress wouldn't normally wish this of me, it must be the booze talking" ?

If my Master straight ordered me to do something i considered to be dangerous.. i would question it and then, reassured, i would trust in His duty of care and obey.
If it was something that would have a lasting effect, i know that He would discuss it with me first prior to making His decision.
If it was something peculiar that He normally wouldn't ask of me, then i would welcome a challenge and embrace it.
If He was drunk or intoxicated, He wouldn't put me at risk.. And would restrict His orders mostly to the likes of making coffee and giving Him a blow job

We don't play under the influence. EVER.

_____________________________

"The longing to serve, to submit, to abandon oneself sexually, emotionally, and physically makes one a slave either to a Man, a Woman or to God. Submission to that passion is divine degradation." - Dorothy C. Hayden

Owned by RavenMuse

(in reply to berdachegirl)

Post #: 49

RE: Obeying your Owner? - 7/31/2008 6:53:45 PM

masterofdrkness2

Posts: 1697
Joined: 3/17/2008
Status: offline

if they are to the " hey y'all watch this " drunk stage .. I would certainly hope the saner sense of the sub would come into play here, now if you are saying that god forbid while he/she was drunk they told you " no ice cream".. then well don't have ice cream, but if it does involve some thing being permanent or catastrophic would it be any different than he/she being sober ? at this point there should be some type of explanation and discussion .

_____________________________

So, so you think you can tell
Heaven from Hell,
Blue skys from pain.
Can you tell a green field
From a cold steel rail?
A smile from a veil?
Do you think you can tell?
(Pink Flyod)

(in reply to metalmiss)

Post #: 50

RE: Obeying your Owner? - 7/31/2008 7:21:55 PM

Huntertn

Posts: 715
Joined: 10/7/2006
Status: offline

hhmm lets sit back and ask ourselfs this: Would I do this Even if he{or her} were straight? I f the aswer is no..then you've aswered you question..personally..why would you want to do damage to yourself..or Why does he?

(in reply to Aileen1968)

Post #: 51

RE: Obeying your Owner? - 7/31/2008 11:18:52 PM

Owner4SexSlave

Posts: 1311
Joined: 4/4/2007
Status: offline

I sort of hate reading threads like this, because in my book...
a sub/slave does not equal to having a mindless robot in my life.

I tend to value the mind, body and soul of a slave/sub (whoever regardless of orientation).   I would hope somebody would speak up about anything, where my own judgement was failing at the time. Even at the risk of displeasing me or whatever else.

Issues like this, well frankly have been a bit of a non-issue in my life.

In terms of drinking, I've done different things at various levels of BAC. Not everything is a dangerous or risky activitity.   I think common sense should be applied.

Disagreements can and do happen in many D/s relationships at some point in time.

Again, I think a little common sense can be applied during the fact (either by the submissive or the Dom/me).   Even after the fact, when somebody is sober the next day.

For me personally, I'm not the kind of person to loose a great amount of self control even when I've been drinking. I don't get into fights, do stupid shit that gets the police called or involved.   I don't cause anybody any harm. My disposition is pretty good when I've been drinking.   I'm not a mean hateful bastard towards other people.

I've always maintained a good level of self control over myself while drinking. I would not think about engaging in anything dangerous or risky while drinking. Sure, my inhibitions become lowered like anybody else.   If anything, I might become a little more blunt with people, but not in a manner to pick a fight or cause harm.

Actually, I have a very difficult time relating to people that have black outs from drinking, people that become violent when drinking and an endless list of things. I believe anybody who can't maintain control over themselves and is attune with WTF is going on, should not be drinking to whatever levels they are not.

I can not simply pass a blanket judgement that's totally for, nor against drinking. It all depends in my book.   There a number of factors besides alcohol involved.

I can totally understand and relate that some people, use very poor and crappy judgement when drinking. In fact some people black out.

I can also totally understand that not everybody is bat shit crazy and their judgement is totally fucked when they have been drinking.

Again, back to a sub/slave not being a mindless robot in my book.

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 52

RE: Obeying your Owner? - 8/1/2008 12:36:15 AM

RavenMuse

Posts: 4030
Joined: 1/23/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: berdachegirl

When your Master or Mistress orders you to do something dangerous, or something with lasting effect, but also something you feel they normally wouldn't ask you to do, do you obey them? If they are drunk, inebriated or otherwise in an altered state, at what point do you say "Mistress wouldn't normally wish this of me, it must be the booze talking" ?

It is My responcibility to correctly assess the risk and take care not to cause harm. Hurt certainly, harm no. she can point out something if she thinks I may have overlooked something, thats fine, two people looking out to avoid mistakes is a good thing. However the decision is Mine and she trusts in My ability to handle that responcibility correctly. Refusal is NOT acceptable.

As for drunk or otherwise under the influence... If I drink, We don't play, simple as that and I don't drink to the point of loss of control anyhow (Enough that judgement could be impaired, hence I don't play if I have, but not 'drunk')... ergo.... that part of your question is not applicable.

_____________________________

This above all: to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.

Owner of metalmiss

(in reply to berdachegirl)

Post #: 53

RE: Obeying your Owner? - 8/1/2008 1:01:53 AM

ProtagonistLily

Posts: 1222
Joined: 12/27/2004
Status: offline

quote:

When your Master or Mistress orders you to do something dangerous, or something with lasting effect, but also something you feel they normally wouldn't ask you to do, do you obey them? If they are drunk, inebriated or otherwise in an altered state, at what point do you say "Mistress wouldn't normally wish this of me, it must be the booze talking" ?

curious,
~cheryl~

Sir is in control of himself; to that end, he does not drink to the point that the booze talks. That would be unacceptable for him by his own admission.We maintain a drug free home.

Also, he does not order me to do dangerous things; he respects his property and to that end, wants it in the best physical and mental condition it can be. In many ways, he treats me like the lawn mower or the ATV - He wants them to run in peak performance, and takes care of them regularly to maintain that high output. He's meticulous about maintanence, and keeps them clean and in good repair. Why should the expectations he has for me be any differant? He's not wreckless with his property; he respects the value of good things and wants to keep them that way.

Sir expects me to be a thinking person; He expects me to participate in our relationship, and to speak up if I see an issue. If he 'ordered' me to do something that could put myself in serious danger with long lasting consequences, I would surely speak up. If he insisted and I truly felt that what he was demanding of me was seriously questionable, I do not think I would obey the directive.

Now I am talking seriously wreckless endangerment, not something that is a limit pusher that I may not *want* to do but would not carry serious consequences either physical or mental. I'm talking driving the car 100 miles off a cliff or something equally nutty.

PL

_____________________________

"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind"
~Dr. Seuss~

(in reply to berdachegirl)

Post #: 54

RE: Obeying your Owner? - 8/1/2008 4:18:52 AM

Aileen1968

Posts: 6062
Joined: 12/12/2007
From: I miss Shore, New Jersey
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Owner4SexSlave

I can totally understand and relate that some people, use very poor and crappy judgement when drinking. In fact some people black out.

I can also totally understand that not everybody is bat shit crazy and their judgement is totally fucked when they have been drinking.

Haha...some people have poor and crappy judgement and are bat shit crazy even when completely sober.

_____________________________

(in reply to Owner4SexSlave)

Post #: 55

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