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One line can say so much! - 8/3/2008 7:24:39 AM   
CallaFirestormBW


Posts: 3651
Joined: 6/29/2008
Status: offline 		Take this with a grain of salt and an expression of my desire to just rant and hear myself talk this morning.

I've been reading on the forums, listening to both sides of the coin debate about one-liner introductory posts and being so willing to shut out a potential contact based on how many words went into the initial greeting... What got my back up this morning was a gentleman who was complaining that the dominas who contact -him- often do so with only one line. He was clearly annoyed, and commented that, essentially, he'd find it insulting and would dismiss them.

I have had some incredible encounters here that started with one line. One started with just a simple "Hello, Ma'am"... and a smiley wink. A glance at the profile had me enticed, even though this would clearly not be a "meet in two days" kind of situation. I have since not been disappointed at all. The interaction has been all that I hoped -- funny, exciting, pleasant, interesting... and yet not -one- of our posts to one another have been more than a few lines. I think the longest one topped out at 10 lines in either direction.

Heck, in the real world, I don't go up to people at a gathering and give them a dissertation about how I have read everything I could find on them. I say "Hello" and we go from there. Sure, here we have a little advantage in the profiles, but really, all those do is take the place of seeing that cool-looking flogging across the room and getting enticed by the sounds/smells/movement... we still don't know the -person- until we converse. Some conversations turn into friendships -- some turn into "Oh heck, what an idiot."... but how do you know until you say "hello" back?

Not everyone I meet here is going to be someone I play with -- but I don't presume that someone who just posts to say 'hello' is necessarily a "wanker" or "being rude". I have had so much fun sending a quick "hello" back, just to see if there is more to the person with a little encouragement. Shoot -- how many people can say that they have "too many" friends? Is that possible?

Some stuff turns me off. It grosses me out and disgusts me... and some folks don't bother to read -- they just send their own fantasies out there to see if someone 'bites'. Even these get a "sorry, not interested in this kind of conversation". I've had one or two of these people write back with an apology, scope the profile, and even make nice conversation for an exchange or two.

We're so quick to shut people into nasty little boxes. Heck... you never know when the "accidental creep" who just doesn't know the rules will turn out to be a really cool person.

Sheesh.

Calla Firestorm Bladewing

_____________________________

***
Said to me recently: "Look, I know you're the "voice of reason"... but dammit, I LIKE being unreasonable!!!!"

"Your mind is more interested in the challenge of becoming than the challenge of doing." Jon Benson, Bodybuilder/Trainer
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: One line can say so much! - 8/3/2008 7:35:40 AM   
igor2003


Posts: 1718
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		Being the gentleman that you mention I want to say that in all honesty I do agree with you!  In real life you don't introduce yourself with a 3 paragraph monologue.  My gripe was not so much that i am really against one liners, depending on what that one liner says, but that i hear so many complaints about women receiving one liners that it is somewhat irritating for so many of them to do the exact same thing that they find so irritating.  And yes, i do realize that it is most likely that i am experiencing two different sets of women.  It is all to easy for people to generalize...even myself.  My appologies if anyone was offended.

(in reply to CallaFirestormBW)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: One line can say so much! - 8/3/2008 7:53:40 AM   
CruelDesires


Posts: 824
Joined: 11/20/2004
Status: offline 		Dear "sir,madam,subbie,sexypet,lovely object of my desires", I am approaching you as I want to have wild and freaky monkey sex with you with lots of oral sex thrown into the mix while the whole world watches on cam and we get freaky and throw food at each other and rip each others clothes off and do horribly nasty and awesome things to each other and then throw in some pain play and other horribly crude bondage and kinkified things to one anothers body and then sleep spooned together in bliss so please reply if you are interested .

My one liner that I send out. Do you think I should change my approach and introduction? I don't seem to be getting many takers?

C-D

_____________________________

Reputation is what other people know about you. Honor is what you know about yourself.
Lois McMaster Bujold, "A Civil Campaign", 1999

(in reply to CallaFirestormBW)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: One line can say so much! - 8/3/2008 7:57:19 AM   
CallaFirestormBW


Posts: 3651
Joined: 6/29/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: igor2003

Being the gentleman that you mention I want to say that in all honesty I do agree with you!  In real life you don't introduce yourself with a 3 paragraph monologue.  My gripe was not so much that i am really against one liners, depending on what that one liner says, but that i hear so many complaints about women receiving one liners that it is somewhat irritating for so many of them to do the exact same thing that they find so irritating.  And yes, i do realize that it is most likely that i am experiencing two different sets of women.  It is all to easy for people to generalize...even myself.  My appologies if anyone was offended.


Hon, I wasn't offended... I was just thinking about all the lost potential, and, frankly, feeling very endeared to my "one line wonder from Down Under" who made my morning so -very- enjoyable this morning! *Grins*

Calla Firestorm

_____________________________

***
Said to me recently: "Look, I know you're the "voice of reason"... but dammit, I LIKE being unreasonable!!!!"

"Your mind is more interested in the challenge of becoming than the challenge of doing." Jon Benson, Bodybuilder/Trainer

(in reply to igor2003)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: One line can say so much! - 8/3/2008 7:58:36 AM   
DiurnalVampire


Posts: 8125
Joined: 1/19/2006
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline 		I do answer one liners, I do not answer one word ones. That is just me, though, I think a dissertation isnt neessary, but a sentence would be nice. This is not instant messenger.  Male subs spend so much time complaining about how they cant get any attention and the usual advice is to make youself stand out. "Hi" as a first email doesnt stand out.
"Good Morning, Maam, how are you today?" does. If you are going to try and compare it to realtime conversation... think about how you would start small tak. How was your day, How are you, What are you up o... things like that are not bad first emails. JUST a greeting, though, doesnt invite a conversation.

My opinion of course
DV


_____________________________

I will be your Dominate if you will be my submit - Fox

Snarko Ergo Sum
If you cannot change your mind, how are you so sure you still have one? -proverb

*Owner of Fox - collared 10/13/07*
VampiresLair

(in reply to CruelDesires)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: One line can say so much! - 8/3/2008 8:01:02 AM   
CallaFirestormBW


Posts: 3651
Joined: 6/29/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CruelDesires

Dear "sir,madam,subbie,sexypet,lovely object of my desires", I am approaching you as I want to have wild and freaky monkey sex with you with lots of oral sex thrown into the mix while the whole world watches on cam and we get freaky and throw food at each other and rip each others clothes off and do horribly nasty and awesome things to each other and then throw in some pain play and other horribly crude bondage and kinkified things to one anothers body and then sleep spooned together in bliss so please reply if you are interested .

My one liner that I send out. Do you think I should change my approach and introduction? I don't seem to be getting many takers?

C-D


Hmmm.. I need to hook you up with some of my friends up here. I can think of a couple who would -love- to join you in some hot monkey sex, food fights, clothes ripping... I know of two who would even do it in a blow-up swimming pool in public at a fetish event... though I think they'd really want you to puke on them, too.... some people are so picky! *LOL*

I'd leave it just like it is until you get what you want. Garbage about said it all when she sang "One never died from wanting too much!"

Calla Firestorm


_____________________________

***
Said to me recently: "Look, I know you're the "voice of reason"... but dammit, I LIKE being unreasonable!!!!"

"Your mind is more interested in the challenge of becoming than the challenge of doing." Jon Benson, Bodybuilder/Trainer

(in reply to CruelDesires)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: One line can say so much! - 8/3/2008 8:24:20 AM   
Missokyst


Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline 		I am one of those that detests one liners.  Heck.. one line?  That would be an improvement!  So many guys send out one word greetings, hi. (send).  Generally if someone says hi to me on the outside world I say hi back.  I am not expected to pick up the conversation and come up with a barage of different things we can discuss.  A hi, merits no effort unless you want to make one.
And this is the crux of it for me.  If I had wanted to intialize a conversation I either would have emailed them, or if I found their profile interesting I would have responded with more zest.
Kyst

(in reply to CallaFirestormBW)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: One line can say so much! - 8/3/2008 8:28:10 AM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CruelDesires

Dear "sir,madam,subbie,sexypet,lovely object of my desires", I am approaching you as I want to have wild and freaky monkey sex with you with lots of oral sex thrown into the mix while the whole world watches on cam and we get freaky and throw food at each other and rip each others clothes off and do horribly nasty and awesome things to each other and then throw in some pain play and other horribly crude bondage and kinkified things to one anothers body and then sleep spooned together in bliss so please reply if you are interested .

My one liner that I send out. Do you think I should change my approach and introduction? I don't seem to be getting many takers?

C-D


HEY!! I answered!!!

*sheesh*


_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to CruelDesires)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: One line can say so much! - 8/3/2008 8:32:39 AM   
CruelDesires


Posts: 824
Joined: 11/20/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop
HEY!! I answered!!!

*sheesh*



*Sending GT a bus ticket* "Advice added", Don't sit next to anyone with big knives hidden in their clothing.

C-D

_____________________________

Reputation is what other people know about you. Honor is what you know about yourself.
Lois McMaster Bujold, "A Civil Campaign", 1999

(in reply to GreedyTop)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: One line can say so much! - 8/3/2008 8:39:59 AM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline 		not even you? *grin*

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to CruelDesires)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: One line can say so much! - 8/3/2008 8:48:26 AM   
StrongSpirit


Posts: 575
Joined: 4/10/2005
Status: offline 		In real life you generally have a lot more to go on than you have online.  That is why people dislike the one liners.  On line, the information is less reliable and tends to be of poor quality.

Photo:  Let's assume that it is actually of the person doing the posting.  Is it professionally done?  Perhaps touched up a bit - cleaned up the skin/birthmark, maybe stretched vertically a bit to decrease apparent waist line.  Is it 5 years and twenty pounds ago? 

Profile text:  Often the same people that send the one liner have a one line profile text and no journal.  When they put more in, it tends to be generic:  "I love to travel" , "I want a TRUE master",  "Please be in shape/tall/experienced..."

People need MORE information that this kind of stuff.  Yes, it is a totally unfair that in our culture, men have to make the first email contact.  This means that men have to waste hours writing to people that will never respond and that woman are deluged by men they don't want to meet.

So what?  Life is not fair.  It is not appropriate for men to complain about the extra work we have to do anymore than it is appropriate for women to complain about the excess of emails that they get. 

The only time a one line email is appropriate is if you are NOT interested in the person, and have a single specific question you want answered (Where did you get that cool dress, can you send me the rest of the story in your journal, what exactly do you do with the Listerine pocket pac?)

- Andrew

(in reply to CruelDesires)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: One line can say so much! - 8/3/2008 9:15:55 AM   
CalifChick


Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline 		*sniff*  C-D, you've never sent that to me.  *sniff* 


Cali
(clutching her panties tightly to keep them from falling off)


_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

(in reply to StrongSpirit)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: One line can say so much! - 8/3/2008 9:37:34 AM   
SimplyMichael


Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline 		I write well and love both words and writing.  I often send one liners and never EVER send long emails to someone first.  I figure most asking for that are guys wanking off anyway.  It is called flirting, it begins with a wink and may end there or you may find the love of your life, one never really knows and frankly, one never really knows till you die I think.

(in reply to CalifChick)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: One line can say so much! - 8/3/2008 9:38:07 AM   
faerytattoodgirl


Posts: 5824
Status: offline 		hello ma'am i eat cold pizza for breakfast.... will you marry me?

_____________________________

I did not reply to your cmail.
I am flawed.
Imperfect.
MUST SPANK!!!
SPAAAAAAAANK!!!

(in reply to CallaFirestormBW)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: One line can say so much! - 8/3/2008 9:38:28 AM   
CruelDesires


Posts: 824
Joined: 11/20/2004
Status: offline 		Dear Cali "goddess of oral, purveyor of pornography, luscious lust magnet and princess of loose panties" and to whom I have placed on such a high pedestal and cannot seem to even come close to finding myself worthy of such an intelligent and beautiful siren such as yourself because everyone else on this site holds you in such high regard and high esteem and so worships the written words that you type, I have yet worked up to having the courage to approach you in a perverted yet respectful way and hope you will forgive me my shortcummings and allow me to express my admiration for you and yet worship you from afar? 
Hey. This one liner stuff is cool.

C-D

_____________________________

Reputation is what other people know about you. Honor is what you know about yourself.
Lois McMaster Bujold, "A Civil Campaign", 1999

(in reply to CalifChick)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: One line can say so much! - 8/3/2008 9:40:17 AM   
CalifChick


Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline 		You can't worship me from too far away or you can't see up my skirt on this nice high pedestal I'm standing on. 


Cali


_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

(in reply to CruelDesires)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: One line can say so much! - 8/3/2008 9:42:38 AM   
CallaFirestormBW


Posts: 3651
Joined: 6/29/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: faerytattoodgirl

hello ma'am i eat cold pizza for breakfast.... will you marry me?


Hmmm.. I don't really get into the whole pizza fetish. I also won't bore you with my philosophical stand that marriage is an outdated concept. *grins* That being said, if you can catalog a library of over 1500 books on a casual Sunday afternoon, I might be able to find a place for you on an inflatable mattress under the dining-room table... OH, wait... We turned the dining room into another library, didn't we.... Well... I guess we'll have to see, eh?

*grins*
CFB

_____________________________

***
Said to me recently: "Look, I know you're the "voice of reason"... but dammit, I LIKE being unreasonable!!!!"

"Your mind is more interested in the challenge of becoming than the challenge of doing." Jon Benson, Bodybuilder/Trainer

(in reply to faerytattoodgirl)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: One line can say so much! - 8/3/2008 9:48:08 AM   
faerytattoodgirl


Posts: 5824
Status: offline 		since the invention of the movie and the internet..i dont read books...they take up too much room!

_____________________________

I did not reply to your cmail.
I am flawed.
Imperfect.
MUST SPANK!!!
SPAAAAAAAANK!!!

(in reply to CallaFirestormBW)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: One line can say so much! - 8/3/2008 10:31:31 AM   
Strictwoman


Posts: 10
Joined: 1/4/2007
Status: offline 		I suspect that being the individuals that we all are then we all have different methods of communiating.  Add to that, the fact that we all hold different levels of English comprehension and communication skills, all I can say is "what do you expect".  I send one liners - and I actually wonder about people that I have never spoken to sending me their life, chapter and verse, as an opening gambit. 

Why is everyone here on this site - if you are seeking an English major , perhaps they have their own bdsm website?  I would suggest that you celebrate the diversity, and allow people the luxury of doing the bet they can.

(in reply to igor2003)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: One line can say so much! - 8/3/2008 10:36:51 AM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline 		and that diversity you wish to celebrate includes people who dislike one liners, people who LIKE oneliners, etc.

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to Strictwoman)
Profile   Post #: 20
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