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Just a simple question... - 8/5/2008 6:13:22 PM

VixenXO

Posts: 14
Joined: 7/27/2008
Status: offline

I am having such a hard time finding a master on here, are there any tips anyone could give me on how to edit my profile to find what I am looking for? I feel that it is pretty detailed. I get several messages daily, but none that really catch my eye.

Thanks so much in advance

xoxo

Post #: 1

RE: Just a simple question... - 8/5/2008 6:26:05 PM

masterofdrkness2

Posts: 1697
Joined: 3/17/2008
Status: offline

first things first... you need to give it more than 9 days( your profile says you just joined 9 days ago) , if for any reason you thought just because you signed up there would be a flood of M/D's e- mailing you, umm you was wrong .as for me there are things in your profile that just don't add up , I will not call them out , to others they may be what they are looking for I wish you best wishes in finding what you seek here

_____________________________

So, so you think you can tell
Heaven from Hell,
Blue skys from pain.
Can you tell a green field
From a cold steel rail?
A smile from a veil?
Do you think you can tell?
(Pink Flyod)

(in reply to VixenXO)

Post #: 2

RE: Just a simple question... - 8/5/2008 6:28:10 PM

DarkSteven

Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline

You have several pictures and give an idea of what you offer. I'd suggest that you specify what you're seeking. Age restrictions, must be local, attached status, that sort of thing.

Else it's no wonder that the respondents aren't what you really want.

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to VixenXO)

Post #: 3

RE: Just a simple question... - 8/5/2008 6:34:55 PM

VixenXO

Posts: 14
Joined: 7/27/2008
Status: offline

thank you gentelemen!

(in reply to DarkSteven)

Post #: 4

RE: Just a simple question... - 8/5/2008 6:58:59 PM

katie978

Posts: 352
Joined: 7/21/2007
Status: offline

Second what those folks said. No one likes to think that they aren't intelligent, funny, and attractive (the types of undefinable qualities you seek). So, for those men and ladies who are hard of reading, spell out clearly what you're looking for: A man or woman between this age and this age (then block those who aren't), who is within this many miles of me (block those), etc.

As for the photo requirement, I might reconsider that if I was you. Some attraction in a relationship is important, admittedly, but it's intimidating to know you'll be judged solely on how you look. I never sent a photo until I'd been chatting a while, and how soon they asked was a pretty good judge of whether they were looking for a relationship or easy sex with a kinky girl. Admittedly it's different when you're seeking men, but that's just my two cents.

_____________________________

"That's the plan. Rule the world. You and me. Anyday ::wink::"

(in reply to VixenXO)

Post #: 5

RE: Just a simple question... - 8/5/2008 7:00:30 PM

StrongSpirit

Posts: 575
Joined: 4/10/2005
Status: offline

1. If you are getting too many emails, remove the pictures.

2. If you are getting too few emails, add a picture. Or a better picture.

3. If you are getting inappropriate emails, then: A. be more specific about the activities that you enjoy - specifically add some NON-SEXUAL ones, B. adjust mail controls to automatically send certain emails to Bulk Mail.

4. If you are still not finding people you like, look in the forums. Things we post here are for all to read. That means they are not being crafted to appeal to the single person receiving the email.

5. I generally advice people to decrease their standards for a first date/meeting but increase them for the second.   As long as you do this in a public place, this costs you only time but tremendously increases the chance of meeting Mr. Right. Lots of great people don't always give a good first impression.

6. There is nothing wrong with a woman finding someone she likes and emailing them first.   You don't have to ask them out, you can just ask an innocuous question. If they like you, they will respond, and eventually ask you out.

(in reply to VixenXO)

Post #: 6

RE: Just a simple question... - 8/5/2008 7:04:08 PM

VixenXO

Posts: 14
Joined: 7/27/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: katie978
As for the photo requirement, I might reconsider that if I was you. Some attraction in a relationship is important, admittedly, but it's intimidating to know you'll be judged solely on how you look. I never sent a photo until I'd been chatting a while, and how soon they asked was a pretty good judge of whether they were looking for a relationship or easy sex with a kinky girl. Admittedly it's different when you're seeking men, but that's just my two cents.

I never thought of it that way! I'm so glad I asked this question. Thanks so much for your response!

(in reply to katie978)

Post #: 7

RE: Just a simple question... - 8/5/2008 7:05:50 PM

VixenXO

Posts: 14
Joined: 7/27/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: StrongSpirit

1. If you are getting too many emails, remove the pictures.

2. If you are getting too few emails, add a picture. Or a better picture.

3. If you are getting inappropriate emails, then: A. be more specific about the activities that you enjoy - specifically add some NON-SEXUAL ones, B. adjust mail controls to automatically send certain emails to Bulk Mail.

4. If you are still not finding people you like, look in the forums. Things we post here are for all to read. That means they are not being crafted to appeal to the single person receiving the email.

5. I generally advice people to decrease their standards for a first date/meeting but increase them for the second.   As long as you do this in a public place, this costs you only time but tremendously increases the chance of meeting Mr. Right. Lots of great people don't always give a good first impression.

6. There is nothing wrong with a woman finding someone she likes and emailing them first.   You don't have to ask them out, you can just ask an innocuous question. If they like you, they will respond, and eventually ask you out.

thank you so much for such a detailed response! I have some work to do tonight!

xo

(in reply to StrongSpirit)

Post #: 8

RE: Just a simple question... - 8/5/2008 7:52:02 PM

MidMichCowboy

Posts: 665
Joined: 3/23/2007
Status: offline

I guess I'm from the other school. My picture is on the profile along with height and weight. If there is not a physical attraction, I don't see it working. From what I read on the OP's profile, you want more than just that. Good for you. There are several of us who think there are a lot more important things.
I myself want to know a lot about the person. I like a full description of the person (yep, I read all about the person), their list of wants and dislikes, their description of them self, any posting to the forums and whatever else I can find.
I don't lower my standards. I am fussy. I think I'm worth it. Each person shouldn't settle but should pursue the best they can.

_____________________________

I want to capture your mind, your spirit, your soul, your body, your devotion and your love. Then, will I give you my heart.

(in reply to VixenXO)

Post #: 9

RE: Just a simple question... - 8/5/2008 8:12:12 PM

CruelDesires

Posts: 824
Joined: 11/20/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: VixenXO

quote:

ORIGINAL: katie978
As for the photo requirement, I might reconsider that if I was you. Some attraction in a relationship is important, admittedly, but it's intimidating to know you'll be judged solely on how you look. I never sent a photo until I'd been chatting a while, and how soon they asked was a pretty good judge of whether they were looking for a relationship or easy sex with a kinky girl. Admittedly it's different when you're seeking men, but that's just my two cents.

I never thought of it that way! I'm so glad I asked this question. Thanks so much for your response!

I disagree. If you want to see a pic and make it your requirement, by all means ask for it. I dont think that a "master" would be intimidated by that request. Puleeze.

C-D

_____________________________

Reputation is what other people know about you. Honor is what you know about yourself.
Lois McMaster Bujold, "A Civil Campaign", 1999

(in reply to VixenXO)

Post #: 10

RE: Just a simple question... - 8/5/2008 9:03:56 PM

kinkypuppy2

Posts: 345
Joined: 11/4/2007
Status: offline

Hey it only took me 2-3 years to find a slave..

Be patient and be yourself.

_____________________________

See nic "Kinkypupper" also as "slvseeker" As I cannot reply to any posts or log into collarchat under that name I had to create this profile.

(in reply to CruelDesires)

Post #: 11

RE: Just a simple question... - 8/5/2008 9:35:45 PM

Solipsistic

Posts: 50
Joined: 10/19/2007
Status: offline

I would agree that patience is a virtue. Also, go looking for a guy who fits your needs. Not all dominants are willing to troll CM looking for girls to message and some prefer the girls to contact them first. I would also say that if you want a picture then ask for it. Physical attraction is an integral element of chemistry for some people and if you are one of them, you shouldn't be ashamed of it. As for your current profile, I would suggest going into more detail about yourself as a person. Everyone here is into kink; what makes one girl appeal to me over another is her character and personality, and both of those things come out in a well written profile that tells me a little about who she is outside of her kinky side.

(in reply to kinkypuppy2)

Post #: 12

RE: Just a simple question... - 8/6/2008 12:26:38 AM

L8bloomer

Posts: 480
Joined: 6/1/2008
From: Your imagination
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MidMichCowboy
My picture is on the profile along with height and weight. If there is not a physical attraction, I don't see it working.

I agree with you...in part.

Let me tell you a story. :)

When I was in my early 20's, I met a man I initially wasn't attracted to in the least. I did enjoy his company though and eventually he won me over big time. While even then I wouldn't have called him good looking or anything terribly attractive, I'd fallen for him and because of that I was attracted to him.

Sometimes physical attraction may not happen right away. :)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Solipsistic
Not all dominants are willing to troll CM looking for girls to message and some prefer the girls to contact them first.

I know your message was for the OP, but reading it just sort of turned on a lightbulb in my head. I know this is going to sound incredibly stupid, because it's not as if the thought hadn't occurred to me, but reading your message made me suddenly realize that it really is okay for me to the be the one to contact a dominant man who interests me. Maybe that is how it was meant to be for me...hmmm...

Edited to add second comment

< Message edited by L8bloomer -- 8/6/2008 12:35:40 AM >

_____________________________

Knowledge is power / Ignorance is bliss

(in reply to MidMichCowboy)

Post #: 13

RE: Just a simple question... - 8/7/2008 6:42:22 PM

Huntertn

Posts: 715
Joined: 10/7/2006
Status: offline

remember its the goal at the end that counts..Your going about it the right way..just give it time...

(in reply to L8bloomer)

Post #: 14

RE: Just a simple question... - 8/7/2008 7:56:07 PM

MusicalBoredom

Posts: 620
Joined: 5/8/2007
From: Louisiana/New York
Status: offline

I agree with what everyone else has said. I would add that it's a lot like finding something in any type of relationship -- quit looking. I have usually just look for real friends whose company I enjoy. I have found many along the way. Some of those friendships have turned out to be more than just friends. I have never had any success at anything meaningful when I was looking for love/sex/submission/whatever.

(in reply to VixenXO)

Post #: 15

RE: Just a simple question... - 8/7/2008 8:28:11 PM

RedMagic1

Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline

I live a few hours from you by car, but your profile as written is not one I would write to. The reason is that it comes off as though you were extremely horny when you wrote it, without considering what you would enjoy doing or exploring outside the bedroom.

As an aside, I don't send photos in a first email, even when they are "required," and I don't think that's cost me much in terms of real-time contact. I say something interesting, and mention that if she responds I'll send a pic. Seems to work.

My main point about your profile is that I would have no way to say something interesting to you, because I have NO IDEA WHAT INTERESTS YOU.

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to MusicalBoredom)

Post #: 16

RE: Just a simple question... - 8/7/2008 8:54:44 PM

Leatherist

Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
Status: offline

You will have pretty much what you ask for.

Men tend to be funny that way-anything to get laid.

I'd think pretty hard about what a "master" is to you.

Especially since your ad reads pretty much like a bottom seeking M/s roleplay.

_____________________________

My shop is currently segueing into production mode.

I'm not taking custom orders.

(in reply to RedMagic1)

Post #: 17

RE: Just a simple question... - 8/8/2008 3:26:18 PM

VixenXO

Posts: 14
Joined: 7/27/2008
Status: offline

Thanks Everyone, I've edited my profile a bit. It's still a bit sexual, probably because I'm overly sexual and it ends up bleeding into everything. I added a few things about me as well. I plan to revamp it a bit in the next few days when I have some time off, but until then, this shall have to suffice.

:)

(in reply to Leatherist)

Post #: 18

RE: Just a simple question... - 8/8/2008 4:37:23 PM

apiercedkitty

Posts: 569
Joined: 2/22/2007
From: Michigan
Status: offline

K, i had to - i perved your profile... thought it was ok - but the part about the profile pic comes off as rather bitchy. If i were a D-type that would turn me off immediately. Just my opinion, of course. Good luck in your search.

_____________________________

normal is a setting on a washing machine...

(in reply to VixenXO)

Post #: 19

RE: Just a simple question... - 8/8/2008 4:39:56 PM

RealSub58

Posts: 1073
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: VixenXO

I am having such a hard time finding a master on here, are there any tips anyone could give me on how to edit my profile to find what I am looking for? I feel that it is pretty detailed. I get several messages daily, but none that really catch my eye.

Thanks so much in advance

xoxo

Vixen,
If you have been looking only since you joined 7/27/08, some have been looking for years.

Good things come to those who endure and have patience.

Good luck

(in reply to VixenXO)

Post #: 20

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