ResidentSadist
Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth
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I respect your writings and perspectives, this is why I took time to remove my “crazy eccentric” hat long enough to write you this very sincere reply. I hope I’ve explained clearly how dearly I do value trust and how my friend’s mind fuck is just fine with me even if we lose a few that would have had potential if developed in another, softer, more nurturing and politically correct manner.
RA,
Appreciate your response - thanks.
You've locked yourself into a position that you can't win. Not because the MF scene was too intense or too heavy, but because there is no way that you can provide enough background information to put the reader into the mindset of the submissive and/or the Dominant and their relationship; albeit in a short time frame. Time is relative. You can read countless threads where people advocate or warn about first meeting play. However nothing prepares you for the 'electricity' of a hot first time meeting. Best intentions and integrity can be gone in an hour. It happened to me.
As far as my personal MF experience; I didn't do anything as physical as you but I did play a little MF game with beth back when we first met. I think it was a few weeks after meeting her that I took her to my favorite club in LA. I had been going there long enough to be friends with the owner. It is located next to a 'gentleman's club'. Upon arrival, with beth as nervous and excited as a new born colt; I told the owner that beth wanted to join the club and go through the 'intiation' - dancing a set at the club next door. she would have to walk over alone, and tell the doorman she was there to audition as part of her Lair initiationinitiation and not come back until she earned the membership fee. For a person who had never been to a BDSM club and only knew me for a couple of weeks - it was traumatic; but she headed for the door - where I stopped her and congratulated her.
'Newbie' MF torture; she's still here. Is it possible to die of embarrassment as easily as from a fictitious sword?
Now I'd represent that in the compressed time of however many weeks it was from meeting to this experience I KNEW beth was 'ready' for that experience. In fact, I knew she'd actually 'get off' on the idea. beth was an exhibitionist long before she met me and became my slave. The experience is a fun memory for her; as I'm sure it is, or could have been, for the submissive in your story.
I think what everyone should keep in mind whenever they read anything on-line is that it is but a moment of longer experience. Maybe if beth was turned on or had the same fascination with swords and knifes as she does with exhibitionism, my early MF story would have been similar. As it is, consider all the comments make, including mine, were only reactions to a couple of paragraphs you wrote, not a personal attack.
Dear Murkybutt,
I promise to continue addressing you in the future with the same repetitive attention to detail and high respect that you address me with. I first presumed and will continue to assume it is the typical ‘a’ to ‘s’ type-o, over and over and over again. LOL
However, calling me RA has gotten to the point that fellow forum members are commenting to me about your new acronym for me. Some of whom were really rather hoping to see a retort. It is in this spirit that I jest with about it and hope you take your new nick name in the same lighthearted spirit it is given ... as I do yours. I also know this may have opened a door to endless humors retorts. Feel free to “call it even” and I will consider the matter closed. Otherwise I look forward to a long and entertaining adventure hoping that despite the jest in the way we address each other, the content and sincerity of our future exchanges will remain as earnest as they are now.
Thank you for sharing your wonderful story. You are one of the few to share a story that actually knows the difference between a mind fuck and hardcore BDSM or edge play. I am glad beth ponied up, it takes a lot of spirit to do that! I don’t suppose either us have to ‘splain how that was a submissive and obedient act on her part? Sometimes it’s good to be obedient and humble in a power exchange based relationship. … OK, I’ll explain it but note that I do not presume to be speaking for either you or beth. Being humble (without unnecessary pride) helps you get around pride or “embarrassment” of “fictitious swords.” Being obedient and not fighting the flow, intent or commands of the person you submitted to allows them to impress upon you and reach the goals they have planned. Otherwise you may miss the point if you take control by retracting submission before arrive at the intended destination. If beth had not obeyed you, she never would have allowed you to demonstrate your grace and kindness in the end.
I just wonder why the readers are split so clearly in either loving and understanding the submission required in the OP or not getting it at all to the point they project themselves into it and see victims not volunteers? The sword example holds many wonderful and deep implications about mutual trust, self awareness and the awareness of how edge play is in reality very dangerous and only suited for a certain style of BDSM players. When someone starts playing with dangerous things for the wrong reasons, it is a bad mix. Whether it is because they think it’s pretty like the asphyxiation music video or like the asphyxiation thread where so many uniformed people claim it is safe, it is a bad and dangerous mix. Like I said earlier, in the case of the sword mind fuck, unless you are aware that you are playing with real danger, that mind fuck isn’t for tourists.
I also see your point about further explaining the set up as you did by spending an entire paragraph *selling* the safety and consensually of your MF to the readers and explaining your history and knowledge of beth. You are right, that will never be my case with the OP. It wasn’t my mind fuck... I had nothing to do with it. I wasn’t there and have no original observations or opinions about the event except what little I learned from him after the fact. I can only say how I would feel if I projected myself into it. I didn’t feel I had to do some PC dance “providing background information to put the reader into the mindset of the submissive” in order to tell a story. Despite the attitude of some that post replies in this thread, BDSM doesn’t always revolve completely around the submissive. Sometimes it’s about the Master. This was one of those stories. I was not and do not try to *sell* hanging people over swords as a good idea much less something that should be done with new submissives. When asked, I explained that the point of that mind fuck, like yours, was to test submission. Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar and the story was proffered as nothing more than a good story.
I feel (unlike many others), either you are submissive or you aren’t, you are hardcore or not and you will like it or you won’t. But either way, it’s a good story about a classic BDSM mind fuck. If it had been a story about feathers, I don't think anyone would have gotten on their judgmental high horses. If you notice, on these forums, it is only topics that involve safety or deep/total submission that bring out a certain redundant set of witch hunters waving the SSC flags and doormat slogans. That is because the readers posting that shit have personal control issues and should admit they are swingers and/or kinksters that like leather play, not BDSM lifestylers. Nothing wrong with vanilla kink… nothing wrong with being a swinger unless you are deceptively waving a the SSC flag on the shores of BDSM while trolling for fresh meat and yelling “come on in, it’s safe, the water is fine.” Fucking bullshit, we “play” deadly games with deadly gear. Even the average SSC oh-so-pretty shibari bondage fan has lost their roots due to the swingers “it’s all fun and good as long as no one gets hurt” attitude that conflicts with their desires to explore everything, including dangerous leather play. Rope fans often don’t know that the “basket” (body harness) was created to impose deadly asphyxiation on prisoners with stretched wet ropes that contract as they dry. The desired result of a body harness was to torture someone with broken ribs and asphyxiation resulting death.
I say to them, get outta’ my pond you fucking deluded guppy troll. Go play with your own kind instead of “zerging” the BDSM community with your massive swingers numbers and resources to dilute us to the point you find us palatable… at which point you will eat us and we will cease to exist. We will become some distant memory revived only by the safe little rubber flogger and a DVD on the shelf of the local sex shop. We are already on the brink now and when we cross it… people like me will cease to exist in the public eye.
There is plenty of fresh meat in the swinger’s community which is more than 10 times bigger than the BDSM community. SSC is ruining the BDSM community in many people’s opinion and even the guy who wrote it has apologized many times. (to those that wave the SSC flag, look up the history, it is a fascinating story)
A while ago when I used to post in the General BDSM Discussion forums, I had a PC correct disclaimer in my sig that stopped most judgmental and idiotic replies because it reminded us all that there are many styles of BDSM in this pansexual world and just because you don’t like it or get it doesn’t mean it isn’t the greatest thing since sliced bread for someone else. I don’t post in these forums much lately so unfortunately, that “flame extinguisher” isn’t in my sig these days.
Either way, it was still a great story. Long before I ever expounded my opinions about the negotiated control freak guppies bleeding all over my thread, a girl said, “Master did something similiar during our first play session and hell or high water couldnt get me away from him now!”
This thread wasn’t posted to “win” something. However, the MF stories shared make this thread a winner because some actually responded to the OP for what it was… a story about a mind fuck.
I’ll tell you what we all get, what makes us all winners. Like you, and others that post valid, intellectual and literate fodder amidst the all the opinionated unfounded crap, we have an effect and influence on more people than we can ever realize. We get letters from people that do see our points about the difference between the many facets of the lifestyle and that you shouldn’t project yourself or compete with other styles but rather find your own path that suits you. And that my friend, may be the strongest common thread between us despite any other intrinsic differences. We want to see people learn and find their own path… “may we all find our bliss” reads one of our fellow forum members sig. You and I have spent considerable time and attention in these forums sharing our thoughts and perspectives. I am sure that you, like the rest of us that post relevant BDSM information, get people who write saying that your stories, philosophies and examples have explained the difference between different aspects of the lifestyle. In my case, people tell me that my presence on these forums has “molded their concept”, “defined their understanding of submission” and “helped them choose the path they are on”. It is very rewarding and I feel that we are all winners for it.
Best Wishes
RA… I mean RS
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-=BDSM Book List=- Reading is Fundamental !!!
I give good thread.
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RE: -=Damocles mind fuck=- - 
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