RE: Caught in the middle

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

RE: Caught in the middle

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Off the Grid >> RE: Caught in the middle

Page: << < prev 1 [2]

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

RE: Caught in the middle - 8/13/2008 7:09:35 AM

DominorSomnium

Posts: 75
Joined: 1/6/2008
Status: offline

I have already planned on my dad and stepmom moving in if they ever need it when they get elderly. I figure he put up with my dumbass for 19 years, he can stay with me if need be. Plus, if I have kids, Granpa is a wealth of useful info and knee slapping stories.

< Message edited by DominorSomnium -- 8/13/2008 7:10:27 AM >

(in reply to Vendaval)

Profile

Post #: 21

RE: Caught in the middle - 8/13/2008 8:02:34 AM

OrionTheWolf

Posts: 7803
Joined: 10/11/2006
Status: offline

My household is combined incomes of mine, my elderly parents (retirement) that we need to take care of, my Mother is bed ridden and needs medications all day and my Father has diminished mental faculties, my 23 year old daughter who is going to college, my slave, and 2 UM's. It is difficult, especially with the economy and recent dip in business for what I do. It can be done, but the belt has to be tightened and some bills have to be rolled over if you can work it out with the lender.

The emotional and mental aspects are pretty difficult, and I can see how some people may "crack" under such enormous pressure.

quote:

ORIGINAL: candystripper

Some of my friends and family are now experiencing a double whammy -- aging parents who need a variety of support levels and 'boomerang' UMs who have not been able to find their feet and leave home.

It's actually a triple whammy for some, as jobs grow more insecure and budgets tighten during this recession/depression/whatever it is.

Just wondering if this is happening around anyone here, and how it's being handled.

candystripper

_____________________________

When speaking of slaves people always tend to ignore this definition "One who is abjectly subservient to a specified person or influence."

(in reply to candystripper)

Profile

Post #: 22

RE: Caught in the middle - 8/13/2008 8:12:57 AM

lighthearted

Posts: 1165
Joined: 11/26/2006
Status: offline

my mother lives with me but she has her own granny flat, of sorts. when my brother passed away, I decided to be pro-active as I knew 100% of her care would fall on my shoulders. she sold her home and used part of the proceeds to build an addition to my home.

the hardest part has been defining boundaries, but once that happened, it's been a win-win situation. she's always been frugal, so social security and the remains of her home sale have been plenty enough for her to live and still enjoy life too, esp since she is relieved of a mortgage. she gets to spend plenty of time with the UMs, I don't have to worry about driving cross-town if she has an emergency, and the free childcare is a tremendous help, esp in the summertime.

I know of a situation where the mom didn't have her own/enough "space", and it ruined a marriage. so I think careful planning and no romanticizing are key in making it work.

_____________________________

"Thou art to me a delicious torment." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

(in reply to candystripper)

Profile

Post #: 23