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RE: How to Get Girls To Respond - 8/12/2008 6:52:51 PM

OsideGirl

Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: kolekorin

My question: Sub girlies, what is the best way to approach you?

Well you could start by not calling me "girlie". I'm not a girl, I'm a lady or a woman. I'm not your pet, dear, or baby either.

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to kolekorin)

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Post #: 21

RE: How to Get Girls To Respond - 8/12/2008 7:16:23 PM

DarkSteven

Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline

1. Write a profile. It shows you put in effort and that you can spell.
2. When you contact a woman, be sure to mention something you like about her profile (there's gotta be something to make you write her).
3. Accept the fact that youre response rate will be small. Mine probably ran maybe 5%-10%, Women may have moved on, may no longer be active, may not be attracted to you. Who knows, and who cares - if you don;t hear back, they're not for you. Move on.
4. Quit worrying about appearing weak or indecisive. Appear exactly as you are. If any woman takes that as not being compatible, good. She's saved both of you time. It's unfair to both of you for you to cultivate an image that is not true to you, and it's not Domly either.

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

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Post #: 22

RE: How to Get Girls To Respond - 8/21/2008 8:53:23 PM

DadWizard

Posts: 4
Joined: 5/27/2005
Status: offline

Yeah, don't worry about getting a response. You probably won't get one. For all of the bitching the "subs" do about the fake, phony, and wannabe Doms, it's just as bad on the sub/slave side. They are all pretty much B.S .profiles, posting the profile IS the fullfilment of the fantasy and they don't intend to go farther. Let hear it for the collarme experience!

(in reply to DarkSteven)

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Post #: 23

RE: How to Get Girls To Respond - 8/21/2008 8:57:38 PM

StayOfExecution

Posts: 40
Joined: 8/25/2007
Status: offline

Just be yourself, that way you will attract someone who is suited to who you are.

_____________________________

I'm not the gambling kind. And you look like a risk.

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Post #: 24

RE: How to Get Girls To Respond - 8/21/2008 9:26:00 PM

Leatherist

Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
Status: offline

send them a picture of your harley.

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My shop is currently segueing into production mode.

I'm not taking custom orders.

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Post #: 25

RE: How to Get Girls To Respond - 8/21/2008 9:49:33 PM

ShadowsLap

Posts: 36
Joined: 2/26/2006
Status: offline

I know many submissives don't respond to all of the messages they get. Even if the response was, "Thanks, but no thanks!", I used to respond to every message - EVERY ONE - until I had someone use the following as the second line of the message he used to introduce himself to me:

"If you're not serious about such a relationship, don't bother me!"

My response ... none. I put a rant in my journal, but ... while that "Dom" didn't get bothered, he did manage to convince me that it was a waste of time to even read his introductory message.

So, you ask how to get responses from women? Try treating them like human beings first. Actually, all subs were human long before they were able to respond to the submissive soul inside. Yes, this is a free dating site and there ARE posers and wannabes in abundance - but I have met a handful of people from another lifestyle site who are real. Most don't happen to live in the same state, but I travel a lot and make time to have dinner or coffee when in their hometown. Four people live in my vicinity and we have cultivated three different relationships. None are the special relationship I'm looking for, but they will work until the right one comes along.

Meeting people is not easy - even in the local community - it's tough to get to know people. If you want to make it easier, be human, treat others like they're human and be honest with yourself about who you are and who you are seeking.

SL

(in reply to StayOfExecution)

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Post #: 26

RE: How to Get Girls To Respond - 8/21/2008 10:48:12 PM

DCWoody

Posts: 1401
Joined: 10/27/2006
Status: offline

Okay, I'm not a submissive or a slave but I thought I'd reply anyway. Mostly to disagree with people I guess :)

Firstly, the girly thing....that will put many off, especially the more confident /experienced subs who post on this forum a lot, but...some will surely like it, even from someone they don't know. It would probably be best number of replies wise not to use it, but maybe the sort of girl who likes to think of herself as a girl rather than a woman is the sort of sub you're seeking.

Also, the blank profile thing...it will doubtless put many off, but not everyone....I have long had no profile at all (partly to stop getting spam/scam messages, partly because I suck at writing profiles) and I still get enough replies to keep me going.

My advice for getting replies:
1:Don't cut and paste, each message should be written individually for that person.
2:Don't worry about trying to sound dominant enough, or not sounding dominant enough....just be normal.
3:Be nice, be friendly, be happy.
4:Remember that a sub or a slave is not yours at all in any way, and you shouldn't expect them to be even remotely yours before having talked a few times.
5:Don't make a message sound like a CV, introduce yourself briefly and then....whatever, ask them questions, mention things on their profile, give them advice if they're new...explain to the new slave girl what CBT stands for and that she probably doesn't want to be that curious about it afterall...just talk to them like a normal person and be nice, be yourself.....unless yourself is a bastard in which case....well, be yourself anyway; some girls want a bastard.
6:Treat it more as a conversation than a formal exchange of letters.
7:Try not to lie, if you have to pretend to be someone else in order to talk to someone, is that person really who you're looking for anyway?
8:Don't try to barter with them, or impress them or order them about, just talk to them, they're people just like you....except (hopefully) without the cock.

< Message edited by DCWoody -- 8/21/2008 10:49:04 PM >

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Post #: 27

RE: How to Get Girls To Respond - 8/21/2008 10:55:07 PM

angelspassion4u

Posts: 632
Joined: 7/17/2006
From: Angels
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DCWoody

My advice for getting replies:
1:Don't cut and paste, each message should be written individually for that person.
2:Don't worry about trying to sound dominant enough, or not sounding dominant enough....just be normal.
3:Be nice, be friendly, be happy.
4:Remember that a sub or a slave is not yours at all in any way, and you shouldn't expect them to be even remotely yours before having talked a few times.
5:Don't make a message sound like a CV, introduce yourself briefly and then....whatever, ask them questions, mention things on their profile, give them advice if they're new...explain to the new slave girl what CBT stands for and that she probably doesn't want to be that curious about it afterall...just talk to them like a normal person and be nice, be yourself.....unless yourself is a bastard in which case....well, be yourself anyway; some girls want a bastard.
6:Treat it more as a conversation than a formal exchange of letters.
7:Try not to lie, if you have to pretend to be someone else in order to talk to someone, is that person really who you're looking for anyway?
8:Don't try to barter with them, or impress them or order them about, just talk to them, they're people just like you....except (hopefully) without the cock.

I agree with this !!!!!!

_____________________________

Recommends books by Victoria Morris through Pink Flamingo publishers.
"You can PLEASE some people some of the time, most people most of the time, but NEVER all the people all of the time."

(in reply to DCWoody)

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Post #: 28

RE: How to Get Girls To Respond - 8/22/2008 5:36:21 AM

panthersub

Posts: 80
Joined: 5/20/2008
Status: offline

Don't send one line messages, so some may like that. And put some personality into your messages. Talk a little more about what you are looking for, who you are, etc. etc.

(in reply to kolekorin)

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Post #: 29