candystripper
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Joined: 11/1/2005
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Prinsexx
quote:
ORIGINAL: candystripper
I'm not exactly sure why I posted it. I guess it's for good karma. I thought maybe, somebody might read the Op, and their pessimism might lift a little.............
I guess my 'hunger' for D/s is metaphysical. That's the closest I can come to saying 'what it is I know I want' with just a turn of phrase.
candystripper
And as for karma......
my understanding of karma is that it represents what we think we have comtrol over but yet we don't....it's THE spiritual paradox. My understanding of it goes further; that we can, in action and practice, only DO that part of the paradox to ensure as far as possible that we guarantee an understanding of our role within the equation.
(I re-cycle packages in the understanding that that is the best i know how within the overall scheme of things not to further pollute the planet. I do not own a car and walk whereever possible. I have not travelled on an airplane but twice in ten years, i rarely buy new, never buy gold, any jewellery is second-hand and i meticulously switch of all unwanted lighting, heating, appliances and standby lights. Thus might seeem outside the box of bdsm...if it is i like to think my bdsm has the same shaped box as my efforts at reducing carbon-footprinting.
That is to say; i have thus far walked. I have thus far been the one to divorce, release myself and to make reconciliation in the aftermath whereever possible. It might be seen to be connected to my orientation but this is not so. I 'walk' whenever i feel that there is greater harm being done to those ourside of my bdsm 'box' than the dynamics within it allow......
some inherent lie, uneccessary disruption to kids and family, potential for physical and or psychological harm to myself or another outside of consent, sanity and safety.
It might look and feel like the contents of re-cycled 'stuff' shrewn around for a while but eventually after enough analysing, folding, collapsing, compartmentalising and washing (the analogy) it will abd does get sorted in the end.
If it's a prescriptive formula for what i want i don't know and am beginning to consider that what i want is both 1. not what i am going to get and/or 2. is not part of the greater picture or good.
The overall process i have called The Law of Reciprocity...i have no idea if i am the first to term it that here in my profile, and write about it or indeed if someone got there first. No doubt someone will Wiki it or Scirus it foir me and set that in stone.
(It's another hundred monkey syndrome probably).
All i do know is i trust what comes around goes around and versa vice.
Any roads up, as they say where i come from; thinking relatioship of any sort is based solely on personal desire hasn't, doesn't and probably nerver will work. And thus far i am usually the one in my relationships who figured out that one of us figured that one out and i took responsibility for it no matter how much it hurt and no matter how much debris flew around temporarily.
Holding a relationship which works within a wider contaxt, i honestly believe, is ultimately one that is going to sustain. And i can still hold that to be true as a slave.
No amount of prescritive thinking on my behalf (or anyone else's....judgement) is going to make a jot of difference if there are greater forces at play.
No amount of marketing or surface packaging is going to make me think any more highly of the product....when i get to what's inside the box sometimes it's just better to recycle the bag and give the product to a charity where someone else can find value. And sometimes real gems are found in old paper bags which, had i not taken the time to sort and rummage through, i might have (again) disregarded. The paradox is that it's both and either.
Anyway i'm not giving myself up to, or feeding the forces of abuse.
But bowing down to karma is actually proving to be quite a useful position.
*I* have no reasonance at all for what *I* see as the core concept of *karma*. I've never sensed the purpourted phenom *karma* in the world in any fashion...not even by dint of a whisper or shadow of something reaching me via something beyond the 5 Senses.
Even worse, *I* believe there is a phenom in the world *I* would deem *anti-karma*. In brief, I believe that some *fundamentally evil people**thrive* in not only *normative* ways, but also in *non-normative* ways.
It's fairly obvious *to me* that some people *find their bliss* through *evil* and furthermore, *I* suspect that evil may be a means by which *something more* than merely *finding their bliss* can be achhieved or acquired.
I have *seen* *many* people engage in what *I* would deem *purely* *evil* acts and schemes, across meaningful periods of time without once committing any counterbalancing act *I* would deem 'good' in any sense. I *know* *fundamental evil people* are extant in the world.
*Too many* times to be *purely* coincidential, I have seen such people achieve much greater monetary success, political power, and other human *wants* than *evil will* alone could account for.
*Greater* meaning 'significantly beyond what *I* could account for, using any predictors *I* rely on'.
At this point in my life *I* have been able, once or twice, to observe a person like this fairly closely for a period as long as 20 years.
I've wondered all my life why people seem to have such difficulty grasping the *fact* that *evil* exists in the world. It feels *to me* a lot as if people were having the same trouble grasping the *fact* that gravity exists.
The phenom *I* call *anti-karma* seems to be that some *fundamentally evil persons* touched by *anti-karma* achieve and acquire *more* than mere human *wants*, regardless of how abundant they may be.
They *also* *accumulate* ever-more-effective forms of *abilities* outside the 5 senses. This then creates the result that some *fundamnetally evil people* are truely a form of *super-danger* to others and *super-achievers* in their experience of themselves.
*I* did not form my *suspicion* that a phenom of *anti-karma* is extant by observations made from a distance. Instead, *I* drew on *observations* of people and *events* to which *I* was proximate enough that my own *abilities* beyond the 5 senses *kicked in*.
It doesn't make any sense *to me* to *believe* that angels exist yet remain unclear as to whether devils also exist. Similarly, it makes no sense *to me* to believe there are some *fundamentally good people* extant and yet remain unclear as to whether *fundamentally evil people* also exist.
*I* am only slightly different from most people who *believe* that evil exists, in that *I* further suspict that *extra abilities* are sometimes also acquired by a *fundamnetally evil person* by means of *evil*.
*I* don't think it's *possible* to *believe* that *evil* and *fundamentally evil people* both *exist* and simultaneously even entertain the notion that a phenom of *karma* might also really *exist*.
candystripper
< Message edited by candystripper -- 8/16/2008 2:12:20 PM >
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RE: Prediction and D/s - 
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