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Slave with a dominant personality - 8/15/2008 3:42:26 PM

OmegaG

Posts: 1474
Joined: 10/23/2007
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Master Fire Ma'am used this phrase in another thread and it kind of resonates with me. I think that it describes me to a T if I'm understanding it correctly.

Thanks MFM for the ponderance.

_____________________________

Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable. Sydney J. Harris

Sex without pain is like food without taste.
- de Sade

Post #: 1

RE: Slave with a dominant personality - 8/15/2008 4:41:46 PM

rubikscube

Posts: 25
Joined: 1/27/2008
Status: offline

I'm down with this. I love submitting. Being a slave, if you will. But I certainly have a dominant personality. I'm not the kind of person you can just walk up to, say get on your knees, and I do. I'm much more steadfast and resistant than that.

But, I do love submitting. :-)

(in reply to OmegaG)

Post #: 2

RE: Slave with a dominant personality - 8/15/2008 4:53:07 PM

subsong

Posts: 77
Joined: 9/22/2005
Status: offline

    The title of this thread sure caught my eye - yup - it's me too . In my life , I tend to be assertive in most areas , unafraid of responsibility , have no problem voicing my opinions ( though I also know when not to ) , and do not shy away from making decisions of consequence .

    Having said all that though - I can also melt with the best of 'em , and under the right strong mind and hand , can completely immerse in that delicious state of total submission ... yum .

(in reply to rubikscube)

Post #: 3

RE: Slave with a dominant personality - 8/15/2008 5:03:58 PM

LuckyAlbatross

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Joined: 10/25/2005
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Personality is in no way connected to orientation- all personality types can be found in all orientations. The quicker people recognize that reality, the less confused, frustrated and upset they will be.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to subsong)

Post #: 4

RE: Slave with a dominant personality - 8/15/2008 5:05:44 PM

Leatherist

Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
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And they like to be in control of the Dominant-yup.

_____________________________

My shop is currently segueing into production mode.

I'm not taking custom orders.

(in reply to OmegaG)

Post #: 5

RE: Slave with a dominant personality - 8/15/2008 5:43:53 PM

StrongSpirit

Posts: 575
Joined: 4/10/2005
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There is a popular acronym:

SAM

= Smart Assed Masochist.

It means a masochist that is dominant.

(in reply to Leatherist)

Post #: 6

RE: Slave with a dominant personality - 8/15/2008 5:55:52 PM

OmegaG

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Joined: 10/23/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: StrongSpirit

There is a popular acronym:

SAM

= Smart Assed Masochist.

It means a masochist that is dominant.

I don't tend to equate someone with mouth as someone who is automatically dominant.

_____________________________

Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable. Sydney J. Harris

Sex without pain is like food without taste.
- de Sade

(in reply to StrongSpirit)

Post #: 7

RE: Slave with a dominant personality - 8/15/2008 6:00:26 PM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: StrongSpirit
There is a popular acronym:

SAM

= Smart Assed Masochist.

It means a masochist that is dominant.

I've never heard it equated to that. To me it's a masochist who isn't submissive, or at least in a scene will often make smart assed remarks for attention and to raise the intensity of the scene.

Not being submissive does not equate to being dominant, and masochism has nothing to do with dominance or submission.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to StrongSpirit)

Post #: 8

RE: Slave with a dominant personality - 8/15/2008 6:57:28 PM

jim64

Posts: 86
Joined: 10/21/2007
Status: offline

I am a masochist. I do not really see myself as submissive. I am certainly not a slave. I do have some sub behavior patterns. I do not make smart ass remarks during play...well, not very often. Usually, I just moan or growl " MORE!" I'm sorry, "Please, Ms!"

I have learned to think less about "what" to call myself. It is much more rewarding to truly try to find yourself.

jim the seeker

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 9

RE: Slave with a dominant personality - 8/16/2008 12:19:39 AM

sillyslaveboy

Posts: 169
Joined: 7/28/2008
Status: offline

*grins* my everyday life is such that i have to wipe asses and sometimes be exceptionally hard on people, having them even crying. The environment is asking for that.

This does not make me any less of a slave, as i find happiness in knowledge that all that drive i need inside that place goes away with the first word of my beloved and worshiped Mistress (actually was going, i'm not owned at present). i've never failed to distinguish these two. Maybe i have double personality. :)

(in reply to jim64)

Post #: 10

RE: Slave with a dominant personality - 8/16/2008 1:53:29 AM

MasterFireMaam

Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
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quote:

ORIGINAL: StrongSpirit

There is a popular acronym:

SAM

= Smart Assed Masochist.

It means a masochist that is dominant.

I disagree. I think a SAM is a masochist who has learned being a smart mouth gets them what they want through manipulation of verbal cues and emotional response.

Master Fire

_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
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Ms Relationship Books
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BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to StrongSpirit)

Post #: 11

RE: Slave with a dominant personality - 8/16/2008 5:39:10 AM

sweetnurseBBW

Posts: 2464
Joined: 1/26/2006
From: North Carolina
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

Personality is in no way connected to orientation- all personality types can be found in all orientations. The quicker people recognize that reality, the less confused, frustrated and upset they will be.

I agree. I am a very head strong woman and assertive but that in in no way affects my abilities to be a slave.

_____________________________

Sir Pain's pain slut

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 12

RE: Slave with a dominant personality - 8/16/2008 6:29:31 AM

StrongSpirit

Posts: 575
Joined: 4/10/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterFireMaam

I disagree. I think a SAM is a masochist who has learned being a smart mouth gets them what they want through manipulation of verbal cues and emotional response.

Master Fire

So you think a masochist that is manipulating their dominant is submissive?

Look, many subs say they are submissive because of the sense of power they feel they have over their dominant (similar to the view held by any strippers).

When you start manipulating the top, that's dominance.

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)

Post #: 13

RE: Slave with a dominant personality - 8/16/2008 7:06:15 AM

barelynangel

Posts: 6233
Status: offline

Some of the most dominant personalitiied women i know thrive in slavery. I was one of them. Many people it seems mistake slave to equate ultra submissive, they aren't. While the observations of a slave may "look" like she is ultra submissive in nature -- the surface actions do not make the slave, her slave nature has nothing to do with her personality nor does it necessarily begin within the concept of her being a submissive. There are dominant personalities, submissive personalities and people in between who have slave natures and thrive in slavery of Men. All her personality does is pretty much match her up with the Man who will own her, and is capable of mastering and enslaving her and it may also save her from Men who are not capable of mastering her, enslaving her and owning her - grins saving her from much frustration and self-doubt with weaker men. Its funny how things many times seem oxymoronic to some people tend to be the very thing that protects her from the incapable.

angel

_____________________________

What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.
R.W. Emerson

(in reply to StrongSpirit)

Post #: 14

RE: Slave with a dominant personality - 8/16/2008 8:37:45 AM

NuevaVida

Posts: 6707
Joined: 8/5/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: barelynangel

Its funny how things many times seem oxymoronic to some people tend to be the very thing that protects her from the incapable.

angel

Excellently stated.

Being a strong and powerful person does not negate the ability to submit to a capable strong and powerful person. It negates the ability to submit to one who is weaker or less capable, in fact, that just causes frustration for everyone.

_____________________________

Live Simply. Love Generously. Care Deeply. Speak Kindly.

(in reply to barelynangel)

Post #: 15

RE: Slave with a dominant personality - 8/16/2008 8:46:37 AM

sillyslaveboy

Posts: 169
Joined: 7/28/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: NuevaVida
Being a strong and powerful person does not negate the ability to submit to a capable strong and powerful person. It negates the ability to submit to one who is weaker or less capable, in fact, that just causes frustration for everyone.

i'd disagree in case we compare different (incomparable) types of powers and capabilities here. For example, being successful in business world does not mean being unable to fall in servitude to Somebody who's successful in awaking all your sub instincts with just a word or two. This Person must not run successful business at all.

(in reply to NuevaVida)

Post #: 16

RE: Slave with a dominant personality - 8/16/2008 8:52:51 AM

NuevaVida

Posts: 6707
Joined: 8/5/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: sillyslaveboy

quote:

ORIGINAL: NuevaVida
Being a strong and powerful person does not negate the ability to submit to a capable strong and powerful person. It negates the ability to submit to one who is weaker or less capable, in fact, that just causes frustration for everyone.

i'd disagree in case we compare different (incomparable) types of powers and capabilities here. For example, being successful in business world does not mean being unable to fall in servitude to Somebody who's successful in awaking all your sub instincts with just a word or two. This Person must not run successful business at all.

I'm confused by your post to me. I agree that being successful in business does not mean one can not submit successfully to another. I just think a strong person needs to submit to an equally strong, or stronger person.

I don't understand part about "This Person must not run successful business at all." What do you mean?

_____________________________

Live Simply. Love Generously. Care Deeply. Speak Kindly.

(in reply to sillyslaveboy)

Post #: 17

RE: Slave with a dominant personality - 8/16/2008 9:08:29 AM

sillyslaveboy

Posts: 169
Joined: 7/28/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: NuevaVida
I agree that being successful in business does not mean one can not submit successfully to another

... who's not that successful in business. Add this and we'd agree.

quote:

ORIGINAL: NuevaVida
I just think a strong person needs to submit to an equally strong, or stronger person.

i disagree there is only one type of personality strength, as every personality has weak and strong points. The catch is to match two people that pass to each other like a key and keyhole, not to make a single lined scale that would consider one or another for more strong.

(in reply to NuevaVida)

Post #: 18

RE: Slave with a dominant personality - 8/16/2008 9:17:05 AM

NuevaVida

Posts: 6707
Joined: 8/5/2008
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OK, I see where the confusion came from.

I'm not talking about linear power, nor am I talking about what one does for a living. It's hard to describe for me. Sometimes I meet people who are just oozing with strength and power - it practically comes out of their pours. It doesn't matter what they do for a living,or what their hobbies are. It's a personality - an aura - an inner intelligence (not necessarily book smarts). If I were to submit again, it would need to be to someone who is as strong or stronger than me, who can challenge my mind, who can channel my own power effectively so that I do not overpower him.

This in no way means the dominant can not have weaknesses. I would certainly hope he would!! And I would hope he would have enough trust in me to expose those weaknesses, and reveal himself to me, knowing that I am strong enough to handle it.

But if his weakness is his ability (or lack thereof) to dominate me, then I could not submit to him.

Not sure if I am explaining this well.

_____________________________

Live Simply. Love Generously. Care Deeply. Speak Kindly.

(in reply to sillyslaveboy)

Post #: 19

RE: Slave with a dominant personality - 8/16/2008 9:17:34 AM

Leatherist

Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sillyslaveboy

quote:

ORIGINAL: NuevaVida
I agree that being successful in business does not mean one can not submit successfully to another

... who's not that successful in business. Add this and we'd agree.

quote:

ORIGINAL: NuevaVida
I just think a strong person needs to submit to an equally strong, or stronger person.

i disagree there is only one type of personality strength, as every personality has weak and strong points. The catch is to match two people that pass to each other like a key and keyhole, not to make a single lined scale that would consider one or another for more strong.

I think a lot of wannabe "owned" out there set the bar higher than they could possibly jump themselves. Comes from pride-they cannot submit to someone they even see as an equal.

_____________________________

My shop is currently segueing into production mode.

I'm not taking custom orders.

(in reply to sillyslaveboy)

Post #: 20

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