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First Munch - 8/16/2008 3:15:28 PM

yourbytch

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Joined: 8/6/2008
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Well, I'm going to be attending my first Munch tomorrow and was wondering what its like or what I should expect. I'm pretty damn nervous/anxious. This is also going to be my first encounter with anything bdsm related outside of these forums.

Damn you grammatical demons living in my laptop.

< Message edited by yourbytch -- 8/16/2008 3:16:25 PM >

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RE: First Munch - 8/16/2008 3:23:38 PM

DomDolf

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If it's like most munches you can relax. It's just a bunch of people that get together and talk about everything including BDSM and Ds. If they have a newbies meeting then you might want to attend those also. Anyway, it's a social event, no preasure, you won't be challenged or judged if you are yourself.

There are no protocols or must say or must dos.

Some people don't use their real names at these things so don't be surprised if you hear some name you've never hear before. Relax and have fun.

Dolf

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RE: First Munch - 8/16/2008 3:28:15 PM

LuckyAlbatross

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RE: First Munch - 8/16/2008 3:37:28 PM

yourbytch

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Both replies are much appreciated. Sorry for wasting your time Lucky, I should have looked a bit harder.

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RE: First Munch - 8/16/2008 5:10:12 PM

chamberqueen

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From: Kalamazoo, MI
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At the first munch I attended I talked with someone about our jobs for 45 minutes before anything lifestyle came up at all. Many are held in family friendly venues, like restaurants, where people are asked not to come in full dress or with toys. I was nervous before I went, but very glad that I did. I made some lasting friends from the first night.

I am not sure of your position, but if you are a sub/slave you DO NOT have to act as one to anyone but your partner. Chances are you won't be asked to, but some like to cross the line and expect submission. Likewise, you do not need to allow yourself to be touched - though that is often much more of a problem for women.

When I attended in Grand Rapids I found a man I designated as my "safe" person. If I didn't understand a term, or an interaction, I would ask him. If I was uncomfortable with the way I was being treated at all I would go back and sit next to my safe person. You might look for someone like that who you seem to get along with well and knows the other attendees fairly well. There are game players in every group, and it can be confusing in the beginning.

Let people know if you are attached or not right away - or if you are not attached but just looking for friends. Your wishes will normally be respected. Just keep in mind that you are attending for the purpose of being with others with similar interests and relax and try to enjoy yourself. Sometimes it takes a while to feel comfortable, so be willing to sit through an hour of not much interaction if you are a somewhat shy person. I'm sure you'll end up having a good time and being glad that you went.

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RE: First Munch - 8/16/2008 5:54:16 PM

yourbytch

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Aye, I think I've met someone along the lines of what you are talking about. I'm going without a partner, so She told me to ask for Her. My biggest concern is I get there and its not real, but I have to see. And to be entirely honest, I'm not sure of my position either. I guess I'll just be what I'm wanted for. That seems to make the most sense, yes?

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RE: First Munch - 8/16/2008 5:58:42 PM

ResidentSadist

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Grats... have fun.

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I give good thread.

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RE: First Munch - 8/16/2008 10:26:45 PM

AdamTaylor

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I was at my first Munch just this Friday.

I was great. Met some wonderful people. We chatted about all sorts of things, not just the lifestyle.
Though, naturally when the lifestyle came up, we had varied discussions on numerous topics. Everyone giving their own views and opinions.

It really helps you learn about the lifestyle, and the community.

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RE: First Munch - 8/16/2008 10:34:54 PM

MaamJay

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Good on you new lads getting out and about! It does take a bit of courage to go to your first munch ... at the time I had a sub hubby and he wouldn't go till I'd been to one alone first! I met some great folks and made some longstanding friends from the first. Yes there were some players from time to time, but after you've met some genuine folks the players get a bit easier to spot!

Hope you end up finding the partner you want.
Maam Jay aka violet[A]

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RE: First Munch - 8/16/2008 11:24:26 PM

sunshinemiss

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To the OP:

I hadn't been to a munch in a hundred years. Went to one today and had a nice time. It was like a bell curve - liked some people didn't like others...

Just be yourself.

oh.. and don't order spagghetti. It is the one food you can just never look good eating. *winks.
sunshine

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RE: First Munch - 8/16/2008 11:28:26 PM

AdamTaylor

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I club a club sandwich.
I try to avoid overly messy foods when out with a group.

I don't like going for ribs or wings on a first date, unless we'll both be having it. ;)

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