RE: I WANNA KNOW!!!!! (Full Version)

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Pyrrsefanie -> RE: I WANNA KNOW!!!!! (8/17/2008 5:42:40 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: L8bloomer

quote:

ORIGINAL: Pyrrsefanie

Something better explode on this thread soon, my popcorn's getting cold.



I like cold popcorn. :) Then again, I like it in all temperature ranges.



Petitioning to change the subject of this thread to popcorn and all of its varieties since this current topic's been done to death anyway. 



faerytattoodgirl -> RE: I WANNA KNOW!!!!! (8/17/2008 5:42:43 PM)

ok i figure ill put an actual reply ....

1)being a sub/slave or dom is a natural thing..one can not be trained this way.
2)training means how a person trains someone to make their coffee the way they like it...or make their bed, or do the laundry and of course your specialty things like flogging, fireplay, wax, rope bondage...etc etc.

experience i have found is meaningless.  the connection/chemistry is what is important.



katie978 -> RE: I WANNA KNOW!!!!! (8/17/2008 5:43:34 PM)

  Everyone who has lingered on the forums for any length of time knows that age has very little to do with experience. Yes, if an 18-year-old claims to have 10 years experience, it seems a bit overstated. However, if a 40-year-old man with a vanilla wife who had one kinky girlfriend at 18 claims he has 22 years of experience, I think he's more the liar.

Yes, 18-year-olds still have some learning to do. I'm 22, and I know for sure I've got learning to do. However, a lack of experience doesn't mean that I'm a bleeding idiot. There's not an age requirement in real life. I'm really sorry if it took you many years to discover your kinks and quirks. I'm so happy that I discovered myself as young as I did. However, the whiny bitterness isn't particularly appealing at any age.

You think the kinky people here are getting too young...but don't you know what that makes you?



IvyMorgan -> RE: I WANNA KNOW!!!!! (8/17/2008 5:46:25 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: L8bloomer

quote:

ORIGINAL: IvyMorgan

Well, I'm 23.


But you aren't 18, 19, or 20. *grins*


Very true.

Wow, I must have like, 5 more years experience than they do.  Go me!  I'm like an expert or something :P



AquaticSub -> RE: I WANNA KNOW!!!!! (8/17/2008 5:47:55 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Nitefalls1000

I wanna know how all these 18/19/20 year olds are "experianced Masters/Mistresses" and the amout that call themselves "slaves".  Who trained them? Who mentored them? Where did they get thier knowledge? Someone PLEASE tell me.


We have tons of free time and don't have bills to play. Around here there aren't a lot "mentors" so we go to events, buy the toys, get pointers from our friends, hang out on message boards, read Jay Wiseman, John Warren, etc and practice the physical parts every damn chance we get because we are horny little devils.

What I want to know is why I'm supposed to let a 50 year old who just picked up a flogger for the first time go at my ass instead of the 20 year old who has been doing it for two or more years.



MasterHermes -> RE: I WANNA KNOW!!!!! (8/17/2008 5:52:40 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Nitefalls1000

I wanna know how all these 18/19/20 year olds are "experianced Masters/Mistresses" and the amout that call themselves "slaves".  Who trained them? Who mentored them? Where did they get thier knowledge? Someone PLEASE tell me.


When somebody calls himself experienced, it wouldnt make any difference in your life , would it? They might have acquired their knowledge from all kind of places or they may be lying. In either case it really wouldnt matter to anybody else except those have a personal relationship with the young people in question.

Enjoy your own experiences.
Hermes



L8bloomer -> RE: I WANNA KNOW!!!!! (8/17/2008 5:57:29 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Pyrrsefanie

quote:

ORIGINAL: L8bloomer

quote:

ORIGINAL: Pyrrsefanie

Something better explode on this thread soon, my popcorn's getting cold.



I like cold popcorn. :) Then again, I like it in all temperature ranges.



Petitioning to change the subject of this thread to popcorn and all of its varieties since this current topic's been done to death anyway. 



Oh. Can you wait until after I've had something to eat? Otherwise I'll be drooling thinking of popcorn. I might short-circuit my keyboard or sumthin...that would be a shame!

Damn you...now I'm thinking of the dill pickle popcorn I used to eat back home....*dribbles*



DomDolf -> RE: I WANNA KNOW!!!!! (8/17/2008 6:12:50 PM)

Experience is hard to judge because time is not an accurate tool, neither are just the hardships, the training, the intellect, the desire to be better, on and on and on. The accumulation of all of these is what experience is. The algorithm is too complex for anyone to accurately assess at all. Impossible to base on years of "experience". We, as humans, generally feel like we must weigh and measure everything to some extent. In the experience arena we are left with many "common sense" and assumptions based on information we can easily understand and evaluate.

I believe a person's capability is more important than the experience level. The capabilities allow the experience to exponentially improve the possible outcome. With limited capability then there is little experience will do for a person.

I don't discuss the number of years of experience I have with people, though a story or two tends to give it away. I allow my actions and my interactions to speak for me. My experience (lol), tells me that people preaching about how many years of experience they have are limited in some other fundamental areas. Not that we all don't have faults, but the 'preachers' tend to have some faults, obvious to me, in common.

Dolf



slavekal -> RE: I WANNA KNOW!!!!! (8/17/2008 6:18:15 PM)

This isn't college.  It's kinky activities and sex games.  This idea that one needs years of mentoring and education is a myth.



LuckyAlbatross -> RE: I WANNA KNOW!!!!! (8/17/2008 6:21:09 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Nitefalls1000
IDK maybe I am just from a different back ground. When I was trained at the playroom I learned at NO person under 21 was allowed the same with that local scene.

So your experience is pretty Western American based then?  And you somehow doubt that ANYONE under 21 can somehow have a legitimate claim on that orientation just because some laws in some places aren't ok with 21 year olds being around alcohol? 

Too bad they didn't teach you basic logic and open minded judgement making at that playroom.



SimplyMichael -> RE: I WANNA KNOW!!!!! (8/17/2008 6:24:23 PM)

My son just turned 18 and has already read The Ethical Slut and Screw The Roses as well as my mentoring him on a wide variety of sexual topics, both vanilla and BDSM.  He is more self aware than many 40 somethings and in five years I bet he is the match for many of the 30 and 40 something dominants running around in the scene in San Francisco.

On the boards here there is MadRabbit, who is essentially to me a frigging kid (he is 24?) who IS the match for many of my contemporaries.

Now, I DO think there CAN be perspective that only age can bring but at the same time youth can often bring in NEW perspectives and so overall, some of it is a wash.

That said, I do tend to look askance at a 20 something dominant and give them less benefit of the doubt than a 30 or 40 something dominant but then again, I don't give anyone much credit till they earn it anyway.



DomDolf -> RE: I WANNA KNOW!!!!! (8/17/2008 6:25:27 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: slavekal

This isn't college.  It's kinky activities and sex games.  This idea that one needs years of mentoring and education is a myth.


Believe it or not, it's not all sex, kink and games for some of us.

Dolf



ThinkingKitten -> RE: I WANNA KNOW!!!!! (8/17/2008 6:26:14 PM)

It's been said before, but I'll say it again. This is the internet where you can call yourself anything you want, be it true or false. Male when you're female, tall when you're short. Bi when you're dead straight. Petite when in reality you'd need a crane to get you out of your seat. Experienced, when in fact you wouldn't know the handle end of a flogger from the business end. Blah blah blah. Buyer beware.



Jeffff -> RE: I WANNA KNOW!!!!! (8/17/2008 6:43:14 PM)

People are who they are. Except for some specific, "activities" I find the concept of mentoring or training rather overrated

Jeff



SlaveSimone -> RE: I WANNA KNOW!!!!! (8/17/2008 6:53:34 PM)

Where do we get our knowledge? Well, you see, there's this wondrous thing called the internet, maybe you've heard of it?

Kidding aside, I was introduced to BDSM via some one I met on the internet at very young age, and have been involved in some sort of D/s relationship ever since. My submission isn't a learned behavior, I never needed to be taught how to be a slave, it just came naturally.



L8bloomer -> RE: I WANNA KNOW!!!!! (8/17/2008 7:04:03 PM)

I would think the one area where experience might be a necessity is in knowing how far to go with certain activities. After all you don't want to maim someone because you didn't have the foreknowledge of how far you could take things. N'est-çe pas?



Jeffff -> RE: I WANNA KNOW!!!!! (8/17/2008 7:10:10 PM)

I agree,  people shouldn't learn how to  throw a whip on their own. As for the rest how can some one train a woman to be what I want her to be? How can some one mentor me into being the top/dom/master that a particular woman needs? I think we all know on which side of the flogger we stand.;) and I don't think is takes 20 years to become good enough to share it.

Jeff



katie978 -> RE: I WANNA KNOW!!!!! (8/17/2008 7:13:47 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: L8bloomer

I would think the one area where experience might be a necessity is in knowing how far to go with certain activities. After all you don't want to maim someone because you didn't have the foreknowledge of how far you could take things. N'est-çe pas?


I was always taught to stop when she starts bleeding or passes out....that's all there is to it, right?

Just like any other beginner, a newbie needs to start slowly. I have no issues with the idea that beginners may not be as good at some things.

My issue is that a 19-year-old with 3 years of training hitting people with floggers can't be considered a dominant by some of the older and ::ahem:: wiser folks on here. I'd rather have a young dominant with only a few years of experience than some 80-year-old with 60 years of experience who is too shaky to properly throw the flogger.



beargonewild -> RE: I WANNA KNOW!!!!! (8/17/2008 7:22:38 PM)

Maybe we should also keep in mind that a 20 yr old has to start gaining experience somewhere. Granted many of us are very leery of being flogged or whipped by a young person yet there has to be a compromise in the fact that if we guide the inexperienced to do something properly without serious damage, thus they gain valuable experience and practical training to become better and better as time goes on.



patwi -> RE: I WANNA KNOW!!!!! (8/17/2008 7:30:24 PM)

And of -course-, because of the fact that I refuse to "play" in public or hand myself over to a trainer this means that I'll just sadly never be up to snuff as a sub, because I'll never have been mentored, trained or have "earned my leather." [8|]



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