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BlackPhx -> RE: Is it ever acceptable to lie? (8/21/2008 8:19:10 AM)
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I am happy that that has worked for you and your UM. The spirit of Santa and his brethren have been around for a very long time and span countries, he was not just a fiction of the Merchants though his current image is. There are however a lot of fictions that your UM believes because he is taught them to be truths. Try American and World History, or for that matter the News.
You say you do not engage in lies and would rather be told and tell the truth.. then I ask you to look to your signature line
Sylverë (may or may not be your name, unknown so taken as fact as one you are known by just as I am known by my nick)
Sidhe who must be obeyed (Sidhe is another name for elves, which are to most people fictional. Are you saying that you are Sidhe, can you prove that through DNA? Truth or Fiction?)
Ninja Queen (Oddly enough the Ninja never had Queens according to historical records..so to claim to be such without consent from any and all Ninja's currently existing if any would be a lie)
Heck how many of us actually USE our real pictures on our accounts, so any depiction of someone other than ourselves (not just a floral or message image) would be in effect a lie as we don't look like that. Neither Phoenix or I have anything to hide and anyone who writes us soon learns our first names, so the picture you see is us, no one else.
We accept a large dose of fiction in our lives to make them enjoyable. We exercise our imaginations and tell tall tales to entertain, educate and express ourselves. Some of the hardest lies to face and tear apart are the ones we tell ourselves. We do tell them however, and it makes our world a lot easier to live in. We can be hypercritical of ourselves and still manage to avoid being brutally honest at the same time. We remember the good times, but bury many of the bad ones, and this allows us to continue to move forward and even try again in finding our ideal relationship. We heal from the pain and tell ourselves that yeah the sun will come out tomorrow (sitting under Tropical Storm Fay as I write this and facing another week of rain this is a fiction I would LOVE to continue to believe). We believe that the next person we elect as President will turn this country around and that we are going to pull out of the recession before it becomes a depression. We tell ourselves constantly that our representatives in Congress and the Senate are working for us and have our best interest in mind.
We live by the lies we tell ourselves and are told. We strive not to lie to those we love or that we are in relationships with BDSM or otherwise and do a pretty good job of it. But frankly anytime we stand to be whipped with a cane instead of a flogger and we are not in the right head space for the cane, but that is what Master/Mistress wants and so gets..is a lie. We swallow our needs and work with what we are given. The alternative is to tell them what they can and can't use on us that night because we are not in the mood for what they want. Not very submissive that. It's the rare Master or Mistress that walks in and says..so Lets Play tonight what instruments do you want me to use on you and what ones are going to keep you from enjoying yourself with me. We lie when we rise to the occasion when we are less than eager for it..but we do it because ultimately making our partner feel good, makes us feel better as well. We stroke egos, tell each other that things will get better, that somethings don't matter that do to keep relationships moving forward instead of stalled by constant fights just because of a bad day. We learn tact and how to discuss and argue without rancor, and practice that ultimate lie..Politeness when all we want to do is scream, kick, bite and punch or cry and walk away. We do this at work, in the store and at home because to do otherwise, to display such actions would be counter-productive no matter how much better we would feel if we just let loose.
We may want to be honest, and brutally so at that but I suspect far more of us are less honest than we like to believe. If not with others then with ourselves because no one is ever ALWAYS in the mood, all of us have bad days and yet, we strive not to let others we care about suffer through them and so we lie..we smile, we engage in conversation and play when all we want to do is hide in a closet and hammer a hole in the wall with a high heel. We put on a brave face and work to keep family/SO spirits high as we face surgery, medical tests, good and bad news and in doing so ..we begin to feel better and not in the grips of our fears. But when we are alone..when there is no one around, we scream and kick and let it out.
Of course this is only my opinion..but it is based on a lot of observation..
poenkitten
Edited for typos
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