Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

What would you do?


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Master >> What would you do? Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
What would you do? - 11/22/2005 1:09:20 PM   
crimsontied4u


Posts: 66
Joined: 9/26/2005
Status: offline 		What would be your response toward a possible sub if he/she quit responding,either online or by phone,like they totally went poof?

_____________________________

Always believe in yourself!!
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: What would you do? - 11/22/2005 1:15:00 PM   
Chaingang


Posts: 1727
Joined: 10/24/2005
Status: offline 		To forget about it. Life is short.

Edited bit:
I consider my time precious, and I don't easily suffer fools and wannabes. If a sub wants my attention she has to do generally as expected or I will blow her off. If she somehow fails to perform a thing I may have commanded, she gets blown off. My time, my attention is a reward. When I discover that people are not what they seem, they get blown off.

If you are very busy chasing after her beyond an initial contact, she has you by the balls - so to speak. She may know this and use it against you. If it's true, you are an idiot that has allowed the mouse to get over on the cat. You are playing the game of "You chase me." BTW, I am not telling you to play games. I am advising you to adopt a posture in advance of game playing.

If the sub shows up again and gives you some plausible explanation and you feel inclined to accept her reasons, point her here and show her you were advised to demand proof beyond her say so. Lots of people are idiot attention seekers and drama queens, best to find out now.

Part of my interest in SM is to pare things down to the bone. I hate games and bullshit and I vastly prefer honesty and open exchanges.

The other night my "former" reminded me of something she had been doing while we were still together and what the result was - her "instant karma," if you will. Her crime? She had been snagging money out of my wallet. I noticed, I asked her not to do it again without asking me first. She was on her way out one day with her ill gotten booty when she must have dropped it by the front door. I noticed it on my way out - bills laying on the floor with the cat standing nearby looking at them. So I rang her up and laughed at her, "You dope! You tried to steal from me again and I found the money by the front door just now. Have a good lunch..." Of course, I knew she was having jack and shit for lunch because she was always overspending and living too close to the bone in terms of her own means. On the way home that night her car caught on fire under the hood and burned up as a total loss. She tells me that she thinks of these events as interrelated. True or not, the equation in her own mind is as it should be.

I love that story. That is funny shit. Of course it would be less funny had she been injured in any way, but she wasn't. So it's hilarious instead.

< Message edited by Chaingang -- 11/22/2005 1:50:39 PM >

(in reply to crimsontied4u)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: What would you do? - 11/22/2005 1:18:28 PM   
fyreredsub


Posts: 3403
Joined: 10/7/2005
Status: offline 		i would take it they weren't interested any more barring any kind of phenominal emergency having occurred.

_____________________________

"Accordingly, men must then either fulfill their nature, or deny it, and in denying their nature, deny us ours, for ours is the complement to theirs. " Renegades

(in reply to crimsontied4u)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: What would you do? - 11/22/2005 1:24:27 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Chaingang
To forget about it. Life is short.

Yup.

(in reply to Chaingang)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: What would you do? - 11/22/2005 1:28:39 PM   
Nightguy


Posts: 55
Joined: 4/28/2005
Status: offline 		Oh gee...like that hasn't happened to most of us at one time or another.

What can you do, nothing really. It's a fact of life here online that people can come and go in your life in the blink of an eye.

You just have to move on and treasure the relationships you still have.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: What would you do? - 11/22/2005 1:29:29 PM   
fastlane


Posts: 2159
Joined: 5/26/2005
Status: offline 		I would think that the law had finally caught up with them......Damn the luck!

_____________________________

Just because it hurts, doesn't necessarily make it a bad thing.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: What would you do? - 11/22/2005 1:36:08 PM   
FangsNfeet


Posts: 3758
Joined: 12/3/2004
Status: offline 		I'd reel up my rod and start casting in another direction. There are plenty more fish out there.

_____________________________

I'm Godzilla and you're Japan

(in reply to crimsontied4u)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: What would you do? - 11/22/2005 2:06:47 PM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline 		I would just forget about it and move on. It's really not worth the aggravation of worrying about :)

(in reply to crimsontied4u)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: What would you do? - 11/22/2005 2:27:30 PM   
RexLongBeach


Posts: 58
Joined: 10/30/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: crimsontied4u

What would be your response toward a possible sub if he/she quit responding,either online or by phone,like they totally went poof?

I'd admit to myself that I'd wasted time, once again, with an internet phony or flake.

Fortunately, it doesn't happen to me as often as it used to.

Yours in the new world,
Rex

(in reply to crimsontied4u)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: What would you do? - 11/22/2005 3:19:55 PM   
Marquisd


Posts: 61
Joined: 11/1/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: crimsontied4u

What would be your response toward a possible sub if he/she quit responding,either online or by phone,like they totally went poof?


There is always a million available answers to a question that you are asking yourself. I would send an e-mail inquiring about the persons well being....maybe they are sick....had an accident (happened to someone I know that got hit by a car and wasn't around for a month) and see if somethiing comes of it. Or I call and leave a message if I can and have the phone number.

They come back at their time...............perhaps they are grieving a loss.............I alwas tend to be patient with these things rather than making an assumption about something I have not the faintest idea about. In time all puzzles will get solved.

cheers

Marquisd

_____________________________

Relationships develop at the speed of trust

"Official Sadist and Dom of the 2010 Winter Games"

(in reply to crimsontied4u)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: What would you do? - 11/22/2005 3:56:43 PM   
obis


Posts: 412
Joined: 9/9/2005
From: Austin, TX, USA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: crimsontied4u
What would be your response toward a possible sub if he/she quit responding,either online or by phone,like they totally went poof?


I would think the better question is, what "responses" do you have to chose from? If they're not responding, then by definition nothing you do will make any difference.

(in reply to crimsontied4u)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: What would you do? - 11/22/2005 4:20:39 PM   
sweetpettjenny


Posts: 674
Joined: 11/7/2004
Status: offline 		id say...oh well and move on

(in reply to crimsontied4u)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: What would you do? - 11/22/2005 4:24:56 PM   
Aileen68


Posts: 6091
Joined: 8/2/2005
Status: offline 		I'd run to the message boards and start a new thread on it. :)

(in reply to crimsontied4u)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: What would you do? - 11/22/2005 4:48:28 PM   
fastlane


Posts: 2159
Joined: 5/26/2005
Status: offline 		O.K. begin the new thread......MS. De Ja Vue.....all over again

_____________________________

Just because it hurts, doesn't necessarily make it a bad thing.

(in reply to Aileen68)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: What would you do? - 11/22/2005 5:42:20 PM   
topcat


Posts: 1675
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Tidewater, VA
Status: offline
quote:

What would be your response toward a possible sub if he/she quit responding,either online or by phone,like they totally went poof?


M.Tied-

As most of the above said, I'd move on to the next prospect...

On the Other Hand...

I would bear in mind that there may be some sort of reasonable explaination behind it...

Stay Warm,
Lawrence

_____________________________

-there is no remission without blood-

(in reply to crimsontied4u)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: What would you do? - 11/22/2005 5:53:25 PM   
IronBear


Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: crimsontied4u

What would be your response toward a possible sub if he/she quit responding,either online or by phone,like they totally went poof?


Change your brand of "Pixie Powder", or "Fairy Poof Powder". I reccoment that you switch to Flue Powder (refer to ther Weaslies for this as they seem to have perfected it).

Then Mon ami, move on and just add it to yiour learning curve. If that is the worst which happens to you, be thankfull. I.E. Take a deep breath and E.N.J.O.Y......... Life is pretty bloody good.

_____________________________

Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

(in reply to crimsontied4u)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: What would you do? - 11/22/2005 7:49:40 PM   
Misstoyou


Posts: 1149
Joined: 9/4/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: topcat

As most of the above said, I'd move on to the next prospect...

On the Other Hand...

I would bear in mind that there may be some sort of reasonable explaination behind it...



What he said. It is possible to do both, to keep going forward in your life without poisoning how you feel about the other person with bitterness about the perceived abandonment... just in case you later discover there was a reasonable explaination.

That being said, it's easier said than done.



_____________________________

~ Miss Marie

a.k.a. "mean Lady"


(in reply to topcat)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: What would you do? - 11/22/2005 8:34:03 PM   
Sensualips


Posts: 1013
Joined: 10/8/2005
Status: offline 		I would assume he/she perished in a horrific accident, and send flowers.


(in reply to Misstoyou)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: What would you do? - 11/22/2005 9:12:53 PM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Sensualips

I would assume he/she perished in a horrific accident, and send flowers.




LMFAO

(in reply to Sensualips)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: What would you do? - 11/22/2005 9:24:48 PM   
AkaMystery


Posts: 10
Joined: 11/1/2005
Status: offline 		This happened to me recently, about 4 months ago. WE knew each other r/t and talked almost every day for 3 years. Atr the time she had even told she was in the process of moving two states from home to take a job here and be local to me. The home phone was disconnected during the move process, that meant no more email as well then the cell phone was disconnected (I knew better, the # was just changed). I digress though. I thought about it for a few weeks and found that it didn't bother me as much as it should have.

I thought back to some of our earlier talks and it came to me this is just how this person handles these situations. The hardest part in all honesty was all the doubts that had risen. What else had she lied about? There are some other things I wont bring up here that I had learned about a year earlier too that only added to the whole situation.

Your question was "What would you do?"
I forgave her and do my best to wish her all the best and hope she's happy. I can't tell her that obviously but I send it out there as best I can.

Beyond that, live life as best as one can and not dwell. Apparently this is a behavior pattern we can't do anything about so there's little use in worrying or wondering what ifs.

Hope that helps a bit and eases some anguish you might be dealing with.

(in reply to crimsontied4u)
Profile   Post #: 20
Page:   [1] 2   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Master >> What would you do? Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.102