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RE: what were your hardest experience as a new sub/slave - 9/2/2008 8:50:07 PM

aravain

Posts: 1211
Joined: 8/26/2008
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True enough XD

I mean, you're sorely lacking a real, working... *ahem* er, you know :P

Well, rather, you may not be lacking one, but it's totally not attached

(in reply to silkenfire)

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RE: what were your hardest experience as a new sub/slave - 9/3/2008 6:52:08 AM

RealSub58

Posts: 1073
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: oceanwynds

Greetings
i was wondering what was the hardest thing you had to learn in a new Ds/Ms relationship? So was wondering what other's experiences were and how they cope with it.
Blessings
oceanwynds

oceanwynds,
I have had a different experience with humiliation so my Sir doesn't use it.

For me, the former owner wanted a whore and blind obedience. I was so eager to please and be obedient that I didnt realize I was harming myself until too late. His control over me was total and complete. It took a long time for me to recover. I will admit, at times I still crave his control, but the joy I have now way over shadows that crave.

Finding the balance I myself needed was a journey.

(in reply to oceanwynds)

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Post #: 42

RE: what were your hardest experience as a new sub/slave - 9/3/2008 9:52:10 AM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

Learning to trust him, that he will do what he says. And learning to ask for his help, I'm more used to being refused and denigrated for needing help than being given aid cheerfully.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to silkenfire)

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RE: what were your hardest experience as a new sub/slave - 9/3/2008 10:09:26 AM

apiercedkitty

Posts: 569
Joined: 2/22/2007
From: Michigan
Status: offline

i still struggle with keeping my smart-assed comments to myself... i often lose that struggle :) i also struggle with thinking i look good naked - i really don't like that look... but, He apparently does so i try to accept that.

_____________________________

normal is a setting on a washing machine...

(in reply to DesFIP)

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Post #: 44

RE: what were your hardest experience as a new sub/slave - 9/3/2008 12:40:43 PM

WinsomeDefiance

Posts: 6719
Joined: 8/7/2007
Status: offline

For me, one of the hardest things I had to come to terms with was losing my name and being given a new one. I wept inconsolably, when they told me that I would be called by the name they had chosen for me. It seems silly now, I guess, but I felt miserable over it at the time. There were other adjustments to living as a slave in a household such as that one, but losing my name is the one that came to mind when I read your question.

(in reply to shivermetimbers)

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Post #: 45

RE: what were your hardest experience as a new sub/slave - 9/4/2008 6:34:50 PM

Jupiterfalling

Posts: 42
Joined: 6/22/2008
Status: offline

I'm going through it right now. The hardest things for me are
1. being comfortable with how my body looks
2. how it functions
3. not letting either interfere with subspace (anxiety stops all connection).
4. how i express when i am open to more pain or need to stop for a min

note: 1-3 are normal for all sexual activity and only hightened by being the center of attention

(in reply to shivermetimbers)

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Post #: 46