CallaFirestormBW
Posts: 3651
Joined: 6/29/2008 Status: offline
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~fast reply~ I believe that aristocratic bearing goes beyond whether someone enjoys opera, fine wine, fine dining, etc. It is a manner of interacting with the world in which one hold oneself to a standard, and behaves in a manner that supports that standard. My darling and I maintain a "household". We both have ties to Old World nobility, and we've attempted to hold on to some of the dignity of our family history, even here in the United States where such things are not commonly appreciated, and are often even treated in a derogatory manner (as if, by our holding of ourselves in that place, we are somehow denigrating others). As an example, we recently attended an opening night of an opera here in Houston. I was raised in the Northeast, where people -dress- for the opera... especially for opening night. That is how I was raised (and how my Darling was raised as well), and so we did. We were most surprised to discover that many of our counterparts in the audience wore torn jeans, stained t-shirts, and ratty boots, and that we were sorely overdressed for the event, but it was our first outing for this type of event in this area. As we were leaving the performance, one of those audience members threw a soda at us, called us rude names, and ruined my Darling's gown. This person's behavior was met with catcalls, laughter, and more rude comments from others in the general area, and not -one- person stepped forward to see if we needed help, or to assist us in getting our car. We were not abusive to the individuals who chose not to dress for the opening night of a major cultural event -- but from the laughter and catcalls around us when we were attacked, it is apparently perfectly acceptable for those who -do- exhibit their appreciation for the gravity of an event like an opening night by dressing for it to be mistreated and attacked. Dignity and aristocratic bearing didn't come from our clothing, though -- it came from retaining our own self-respect and from refusing to stoop to the level of our attackers by responding with rude comments, etc. I have to wonder what it is about people that they feel the need to tear someone else down in order to make themselves feel higher and more powerful. For the OP -- if a more aristocratic bearing and interests are what drive you, by all means celebrate them. It is not unlikely that you'll find others who share your interests. Getting involved with the local Opera Society, and Theatre Arts Society, as well as connecting with the theatre society at your school may give you more opportunity to meet people who share your interests... and it is always possible to cultivate someone's interests in a given area, if they're not completely opposed to it (for example, though I love blood rock, metal, alternative, industrial, etc.... I am completely turned off by rap and the new R&B--so trying to get me to develop an appreciation for those would be unlikely... but if you wanted to get me interested in operatic rock... you'd have a good chance of being able to watch me cultivate a 'taste' for it.) Also -- just goes to show that "cultured" tastes and baser enjoyments are -not- inimical. Calla Firestorm
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*** Said to me recently: "Look, I know you're the "voice of reason"... but dammit, I LIKE being unreasonable!!!!" "Your mind is more interested in the challenge of becoming than the challenge of doing." Jon Benson, Bodybuilder/Trainer
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