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RE: Defining what exactly is a "Pro Domme" - 9/4/2008 7:25:43 AM   
Lynnxz


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How does being new to collarme have anything to do with one's experience?

quote:

Original: MissSCD
Been there.  Done that. 
 
I have higher standards for myself as a Domme.  I should have checked your profile before I responded in the first place.  You are very new to CollarMe posting as a pro.  That is suspicious to me.
 
I thought I was always to the left, but your definition definitely defines left.
 
Regards, MissSCD
 
No more novels of justification please. 


.


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RE: Defining what exactly is a "Pro Domme" - 9/4/2008 8:32:47 AM   
Jasmyn


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Welcome to CM and the boards ..... I for one think you are articulate, beautiful, pragmatic and a refreshing change ... love ya work


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RE: Defining what exactly is a "Pro Domme" - 9/4/2008 3:48:52 PM   
Paulnz


Posts: 411
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quote:

ORIGINAL: asiandominatrix



As for the prostitute thing people have brought up... Although under the law, I am a prostitute, I don't consider myself one since I'm not paid to have sex!



All very good points. But my advice to anyone entering pro-domming is to start thinking of themselves as a sex worker. The reasons are:-

1. The  law considers them as such ( you've addressed that ), and;
2. Once they define themselves as a sex worker their approach to the business changes. When they try to straddle between two worlds, on the one hand realising the world sees them as doing sex work yet defining themselves differently, their business goals seem to become confused, and;
3. When a pro-domme sees herself as outside the prostitution industry she often overlooks what the local Prostitutes Collective can do for her, the legal advice and health care issues that can be addressed and the general support they offer.


< Message edited by Paulnz -- 9/4/2008 3:50:22 PM >

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RE: Defining what exactly is a "Pro Domme" - 9/4/2008 4:01:37 PM   
MistressRouge


Posts: 876
Joined: 3/18/2005
From: Birmingham West Midlands UK
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Paulnz

quote:

ORIGINAL: asiandominatrix



As for the prostitute thing people have brought up... Although under the law, I am a prostitute, I don't consider myself one since I'm not paid to have sex!




3. When a pro-domme sees herself as outside the prostitution industry she often overlooks what the local Prostitutes Collective can do for her, the legal advice and health care issues that can be addressed and the general support they offer.



That is the best load of poppycock, I have heard in a while lol.

Healthcare issues, legal advice in what way?

As stated by asiandominatrix, I too do not mind being labelled as a sex worker, whatever people wish to define my business in Pro Domination, that is their business.

I am a business woman, have my own company, pay taxes, and I cannot envisage what advice a prostitute collective, could be beneficial to my career whatsoever

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RE: Defining what exactly is a "Pro Domme" - 9/4/2008 4:15:47 PM   
Paulnz


Posts: 411
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressRouge

quote:

ORIGINAL: Paulnz

quote:

ORIGINAL: asiandominatrix



As for the prostitute thing people have brought up... Although under the law, I am a prostitute, I don't consider myself one since I'm not paid to have sex!




3. When a pro-domme sees herself as outside the prostitution industry she often overlooks what the local Prostitutes Collective can do for her, the legal advice and health care issues that can be addressed and the general support they offer.



That is the best load of poppycock, I have heard in a while lol.

Healthcare issues, legal advice in what way?

As stated by asiandominatrix, I too do not mind being labelled as a sex worker, whatever people wish to define my business in Pro Domination, that is their business.

I am a business woman, have my own company, pay taxes, and I cannot envisage what advice a prostitute collective, could be beneficial to my career whatsoever


I kept my comments intentionally vague as each market will have different frameworks.

Here, the Prostitutes Collective liaises between the Police and Sex Workers on what constitutes commercial sexual services and thus what and who requires a license and what doesn't. A pro-domme who doesn't avail themselves of those services, or overlooks them as she doesn't see herself as a prostitute can end up in hot water !! Also there are zoning matters to attend to, the Collective are the vehicle through which condoms are distributed and the health dept., advises are sent out, safety in the workplace etc. In short, my experience is that people who see themselves as something else, often overlook the easiest way to access information which will help their business. The person I was replying to is in a market very similar to ours, and they like us, will have regulations concerning safe and unsafe practise. Has she got a copy of those ? The Prostitutes Collective or its equivalent in her city, will have all that information readily available.


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Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Defining what exactly is a "Pro Domme" - 9/4/2008 7:11:59 PM   
LadyPact


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Hello Ava.  Let Me start by saying that I'm really glad you typed this up.  Sorry to hear you were feeling a bit crabby, but I hope the thread helped.  I can certainly say it did a lot for Me.

I have to tell you that I very much agree with what you had to say here.  I'm sure I don't have to tell you one bit how the money scammers really tarnish the reputation of good professionals.  The scammers I don't even go so far as to think of them as professionals.  They found a way to make money.  Big deal.  A lot of them don't have a skill to their name.  Sure, they're cute in the little hot pics, yadda, yadda, yadda.

Somebody put this to Me in a great way a while back.  Not every doctor practicing medicine today graduated at the top of his class.  I think the same holds true professional dominants.   Not all of them are at the top of their game either.  Some are absolutely great, but then there are others who just aren't worth much.  Those are the type that I think of when I write that I'm *just* a lifestyle Domme.  I guess what I'm saying is, saying that one is a pro doesn't mean anything if they aren't any good at what they do.  It's that second part that is going to help Me form respect for someone who's  in the business.




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RE: Defining what exactly is a "Pro Domme" - 9/4/2008 8:41:14 PM   
MissSCD


Posts: 1185
Joined: 3/10/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Lynnxz


How does being new to collarme have anything to do with one's experience?

quote:

Original: MissSCD
Been there.  Done that. 

I have higher standards for myself as a Domme.  I should have checked your profile before I responded in the first place.  You are very new to CollarMe posting as a pro.  That is suspicious to me.

I thought I was always to the left, but your definition definitely defines left.

Regards, MissSCD

No more novels of justification please. 


.



That is what you think.
 
Regards, MisSCD

(in reply to Lynnxz)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Defining what exactly is a "Pro Domme" - 9/4/2008 9:15:20 PM   
Lynnxz


Posts: 4813
Joined: 10/3/2006
From: Atlanta
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MissSCD

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lynnxz


How does being new to collarme have anything to do with one's experience?

quote:

Original: MissSCD
Been there.  Done that. 

I have higher standards for myself as a Domme.  I should have checked your profile before I responded in the first place.  You are very new to CollarMe posting as a pro.  That is suspicious to me.

I thought I was always to the left, but your definition definitely defines left.

Regards, MissSCD

No more novels of justification please. 


.



That is what you think.
 
Regards, MisSCD


... what?


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Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Defining what exactly is a "Pro Domme" - 9/4/2008 9:56:35 PM   
MistressAthenaX


Posts: 13
Joined: 9/8/2007
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In many cases, being new to CM can be a red flag.  However, Mistress Miko mentions the dungeon that sessions at on her profile.  A quick google search brings her up!  http://www.fetishhouse.com.au/Miko.htm 

Ava - GREAT post!  I could go on and on, but everyone else already has :-)

(in reply to Lynnxz)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: Defining what exactly is a "Pro Domme" - 9/4/2008 10:06:37 PM   
Lynnxz


Posts: 4813
Joined: 10/3/2006
From: Atlanta
Status: offline
It's a red flag when the newbie comes up with inflammatory, trollish posts. Miko's contributions have been anything but.




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RE: Defining what exactly is a "Pro Domme" - 9/5/2008 1:37:30 AM   
MistressRouge


Posts: 876
Joined: 3/18/2005
From: Birmingham West Midlands UK
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Paulnz

quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressRouge

quote:

ORIGINAL: Paulnz

quote:

ORIGINAL: asiandominatrix



As for the prostitute thing people have brought up... Although under the law, I am a prostitute, I don't consider myself one since I'm not paid to have sex!




3. When a pro-domme sees herself as outside the prostitution industry she often overlooks what the local Prostitutes Collective can do for her, the legal advice and health care issues that can be addressed and the general support they offer.



That is the best load of poppycock, I have heard in a while lol.

Healthcare issues, legal advice in what way?

As stated by asiandominatrix, I too do not mind being labelled as a sex worker, whatever people wish to define my business in Pro Domination, that is their business.

I am a business woman, have my own company, pay taxes, and I cannot envisage what advice a prostitute collective, could be beneficial to my career whatsoever


I kept my comments intentionally vague as each market will have different frameworks.

Here, the Prostitutes Collective liaises between the Police and Sex Workers on what constitutes commercial sexual services and thus what and who requires a license and what doesn't. A pro-domme who doesn't avail themselves of those services, or overlooks them as she doesn't see herself as a prostitute can end up in hot water !! Also there are zoning matters to attend to, the Collective are the vehicle through which condoms are distributed and the health dept., advises are sent out, safety in the workplace etc. In short, my experience is that people who see themselves as something else, often overlook the easiest way to access information which will help their business. The person I was replying to is in a market very similar to ours, and they like us, will have regulations concerning safe and unsafe practise. Has she got a copy of those ? The Prostitutes Collective or its equivalent in her city, will have all that information readily available.



 
Pro-Domination is entirely different, there is not really a collective to adhere to, unless a Domme operates from a collective which is a shared Domination Venue with multiple Pro-Dommes that operate from one location.
 
Maybe that is collective enough, and one I personallyrecommend as a base as a Pro-Domme starting out.
 
I suppose it is more down labels, in the UK we call it the Adult Industry, on the whole.
 
That ranges from lap dancers/strippers, porn stars, prostitutes/escorts aswell as Pro-Dommes.
 
You would not really call an acrobat a magician, however both are claimed to be part of the entertainment industry, and so on.
 
I don't mind being labelled as working in the Adult Industry, but for me a sex worker is not really a suitable job description for a Pro Domme.
 
I know some have their definitions of what a prostitute is, if they want to label me as such that is their prerogative
 
There are also many lifestyle/pro Dommes as myself, so mixing the two is possible.





 




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Profile   Post #: 51
RE: Defining what exactly is a "Pro Domme" - 9/5/2008 2:00:02 AM   
Paulnz


Posts: 411
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressRouge

 
Pro-Domination is entirely different, there is not really a collective to adhere to, unless a Domme operates from a collective which is a shared Domination Venue with multiple Pro-Dommes that operate from one location.



We appear to be at cross purposes. What I'm describing is whatever body exists that represents the industry as a whole, often partly or wholly government funded. They tend to be more formally organised in jurisdictions where most facets of the industry are legalised and regulated.

For instance, in Victoria, New South Wales and New Zealand there are occupational safety and health regulations to adhere to, specific to the adult industry. They relate to such things as how bodily fluids are to be handled, the safety of equipment and procedures for carrying out tasks. For instance, in New South Wales and NZ, there are guidelines for how to do blow jobs. The client must wear a condom, and the service provider assume certain positions to minimise strain on the jaw and knees etc. In the case of pro-dommes I can see regulations being introduced ( if they aren't already ) which require certified riggers to supply all chain and hoists.

The industry organisation ( called the NZ Prostitutes Collective here ) helps disseminate that information, which changes from year to year.




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RE: Defining what exactly is a "Pro Domme" - 9/5/2008 10:56:24 AM   
asiandominatrix


Posts: 6
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Mistress Athena, thank you for at least giving me the courtesy of doing some quick research and reading before condemning me!

And hello and thank you to all the other polite people here who've said hi :)

Standard of Domming here in Australia is maintained by your peers - at least two dungeons that I know of require their trainee Mistresses to be assessed in their skill before being allowed to conduct sessions on their own - all training done beforehand is accompanied by another Mistress. Of course, it is up to the discretion of each dungeon to decide what their standard of work is. I suppose working in a group environment makes it easier to spot people who are BSing about their skills (people claiming to be pro Dommes, but in reality having no clue), and those people are quickly booted out so that the reputation of the establishment isn't tarnished. All it takes is one client to get the word out that a particular dungeon has cruddy Mistresses, and business starts to circle the drain :(

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RE: Defining what exactly is a "Pro Domme" - 9/5/2008 12:26:45 PM   
MistressAthenaX


Posts: 13
Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline
Good point Lynnxz... 

And Mistress Miko - it is very interesting to hear about what dungeons in other areas, as well as the experiences of others, are like!

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Profile   Post #: 54
RE: Defining what exactly is a "Pro Domme" - 9/5/2008 3:30:36 PM   
knees2you


Posts: 2336
Joined: 3/15/2004
Status: offline
 I think Pro Dommes
are ones loaded with gifts and Money.
 
Not really a bad thing, because guys will get stupid and pay them for it.
 
It is what it is, knees2you

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Profile   Post #: 55
RE: Defining what exactly is a "Pro Domme" - 9/5/2008 4:56:58 PM   
MistressAdara


Posts: 2
Joined: 4/11/2008
Status: offline
As a Lifestyle and Professional Mistress, I have been informed and supported by this thread. Thank you Ava.
Adara x
www.mistressadara.co.uk

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Profile   Post #: 56
RE: Defining what exactly is a "Pro Domme" - 9/5/2008 6:27:19 PM   
knees2you


Posts: 2336
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I Love this quote~~> 
quote:

The only way to get rid of temptation is to yeild to it. Resist it and your soul grows sick, with longing for things that it has forbiden itself. Oscar Wilde

 
I've done alot of stupid things as a man.
"Phone sex, Etc."
 
We as men seem to be more sexually orientated
then Woman. It seems we want it more.
We will buy it, share it, hide it, even steal it.
 
Pro Dommes know this and it is easy for them to get what they want.
 
Always, knees2you

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Profile   Post #: 57
RE: Defining what exactly is a "Pro Domme" - 9/6/2008 1:21:07 PM   
princessKatt


Posts: 20
Joined: 8/7/2008
Status: offline
" a career woman who has done the math, that's just not true. I think I could have a pretty good clientele and live near a good bdsm market. There's no way I could make a living as close to the one I have now with my degree and normal job. Guys just take the pro domme rate per hour, multiply by 40 hrs a week (or THIRTY, and then they feel they're being generous with the numbers) and come up with some crazy annual salary. Not taking into consideration no shows, how many sessions a day can be done, vacations, sick days, equipment, lawyer, medical, marketing and advertising, etc. And, the reality that it's clearly a job with a lifespan for most pros - you don't see many women working 30+ years and retiring a pro. The burnout rate is high and a woman's packaging and "look" also has a lifespan, like it or not. "

I agree with the above. I do know a very successful reputable pro domme who resides in the Manhattan area. Initially I was surprised by the amount of money she claimed that she makes. She told me my response is a normal one. However most people(mainly men) dont know that a big percentage goes towards equipment, toys, expensive outfits and renting a space which operates as a dungeon. Once those expenses are deducted, her income is still not close to average, but significantly less.

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RE: Defining what exactly is a "Pro Domme" - 9/6/2008 2:11:32 PM   
lobodomslavery


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personally i would not cross the road to see a pro. Too damn expensive. Bully for those who can afford them or as you said yourself if stupid males wish to part with their hard earned its not the pro's fault. me i think its money grabbing but then if its consensual its ok , it matter of individual prioritisation one man's fish is another man's poison and that 

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RE: Defining what exactly is a "Pro Domme" - 9/6/2008 3:54:51 PM   
Politesub53


Posts: 14862
Joined: 5/7/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: lobodomslavery

personally i would not cross the road to see a pro. Too damn expensive. Bully for those who can afford them or as you said yourself if stupid males wish to part with their hard earned its not the pro's fault. me i think its money grabbing but then if its consensual its ok , it matter of individual prioritisation one man's fish is another man's poison and that 


My view differs from this. If people wish to Visit a proDomme to experience a certain type of play, or because they are in a vanilla relationship. It can`t be money grabbing, as the client gets what they are looking for.

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Profile   Post #: 60
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