Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

want to break up with my Mistress


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive >> want to break up with my Mistress Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
want to break up with my Mistress - 11/26/2005 3:15:39 AM   
jouet


Posts: 1
Joined: 5/23/2005
Status: offline 		How do You do it guys?

Even though i knew She wasn't the One for me, i let myself get involved. What can i say? i suck. i also happen to be a male. A male submissive that is. We don't get that many opportunities, and it was too difficult to let Her go.

But now, the time has come. i want to move on. Guys, what can i do or say? The reason i want to end it is that i'm not interested in a long term relationship with Her.

HELP!
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: want to break up with my Mistress - 11/26/2005 3:30:08 AM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		I speak for thousands of women when I say.....please be direct, don't hide, don't avoid confrontation.

_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to jouet)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: want to break up with my Mistress - 11/26/2005 4:29:07 AM   
candystripper


Posts: 3486
Joined: 11/1/2005
Status: offline 		Man, breaking up is one of my best skills. Simply tell her you no longer wish to be involved with her. Most people want some drama and an explanation for your actions (which many times is used against you -- as if your reasons weren't good enough) and so i refuse to discuss "why" (which was generally obvious since he had cheated or done something else intolerable).

Make it quick; over the phone; and then ignore efforts by her to contact you. People feel less pain when the bandage is stripped away quickly rather than being pulled bit by bit.

Whatever you do, don't be a coward and try to provoke her to break up with you by acting badly.

JMO.

candystripper

(in reply to KatyLied)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: want to break up with my Mistress - 11/26/2005 6:56:21 AM   
AbstractSavant


Posts: 149
Joined: 6/5/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: candystripper
Make it quick; over the phone; and then ignore efforts by her to contact you. People feel less pain when the bandage is stripped away quickly rather than being pulled bit by bit.

candystripper


Holy wow. Talk about cowardly.

(in reply to candystripper)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: want to break up with my Mistress - 11/26/2005 7:06:13 AM   
FTopinMichigan


Posts: 571
Joined: 7/5/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: jouet
But now, the time has come. i want to move on. Guys, what can i do or say? The reason i want to end it is that i'm not interested in a long term relationship with Her.

HELP!


I'm not a "guy" or a sub, but agree with the responses so far.

I think there are far too many people (Dom and sub) that remain with their partner out of the fear of not finding someone else to meet part of their needs. It would be an awful situation to be in, where you're being used until something better comes along, or to think you can't do better yourself.

Speak from your heart...be honest and open...and then search for what you really want. If you are truly not well matched with the other person...they will be feeling the same as you are...probably.

My advice is to end it before you both get more involved, and know that you're making the right decision for you.

K

(in reply to jouet)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: want to break up with my Mistress - 11/26/2005 7:08:21 AM   
LadyJulieAnn


Posts: 979
Joined: 6/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: jouet

How do You do it guys?

Even though i knew She wasn't the One for me, i let myself get involved. What can i say? i suck. i also happen to be a male. A male submissive that is. We don't get that many opportunities, and it was too difficult to let Her go.

But now, the time has come. i want to move on. Guys, what can i do or say? The reason i want to end it is that i'm not interested in a long term relationship with Her.

HELP!


I would agree that you need to be direct. Everyone has the right to pursue what they want, and it sounds like your current situation is not what you want. I would make it clear to her that you aren't rejecting her, but the situation, and then move on.

I do not agree that you should do it over the phone, especially if you have had a real life relationship with her. There doesn't need to be any drama, but the more you drag things out, the worse it's going to be.

Be well,
Julie

(in reply to jouet)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: want to break up with my Mistress - 11/26/2005 7:36:21 AM   
imtempting


Posts: 1280
Joined: 2/11/2005
Status: offline 		Well tell her you want to dump her. Sorry break up.

Tell her you will always be together, together in electric dreams.





(in reply to jouet)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: want to break up with my Mistress - 11/26/2005 7:48:36 AM   
candystripper


Posts: 3486
Joined: 11/1/2005
Status: offline
quote:

I do not agree that you should do it over the phone, especially if you have had a real life relationship with her. There doesn't need to be any drama, but the more you drag things out, the worse it's going to be.

Be well,
Julie


Over the phone...in a public place..whatever. Just not in private, so as to minimize the risk of High Drama, which i cannot abide.

candystripper

(in reply to LadyJulieAnn)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: want to break up with my Mistress - 11/26/2005 8:04:19 AM   
LadyJulieAnn


Posts: 979
Joined: 6/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: candystripper

Over the phone...in a public place..whatever. Just not in private, so as to minimize the risk of High Drama, which i cannot abide.

candystripper


If you don't want high drama, don't allow it. It shouldn't matter whether it's done in private or not, in my opinion.

Be well,
Julie

(in reply to candystripper)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: want to break up with my Mistress - 11/26/2005 8:08:30 AM   
candystripper


Posts: 3486
Joined: 11/1/2005
Status: offline
quote:

If you don't want high drama, don't allow it. It shouldn't matter whether it's done in private or not, in my opinion.

Be well,
Julie


There's some truth to that; but in some cases it takes extreme action, such as totally avoiding someone. i have a relative i'm not in contact with because she's got a quick fuse and is a screamer.

candystripper

(in reply to LadyJulieAnn)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: want to break up with my Mistress - 11/26/2005 8:22:13 AM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied

I speak for thousands of women when I say.....please be direct, don't hide, don't avoid confrontation.


Bingo. Be direct, be honest, don't hide...Most of all, do it in person. Using a note, or an email, or the phone is just plain cowardly ( No offense meant to anyone) .

(in reply to KatyLied)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: want to break up with my Mistress - 11/26/2005 9:07:54 AM   
veronicaofML


Posts: 1317
Joined: 11/19/2005
From: from iowa..now in wisconsin
Status: offline 		How do You do it guys?

Even though i knew She wasn't the One for me, i let myself get involved. What can i say? i suck. i also happen to be a male. A male submissive that is. We don't get that many opportunities, and it was too difficult to let Her go.

But now, the time has come. i want to move on. Guys, what can i do or say? The reason i want to end it is that i'm not interested in a long term relationship with Her.

HELP!
============

i cannot help you, since i am nowhere near you. but i will try to offer this;
go to your mirror.



am i man enough to run my life or do i need a nanny?
am i happy with what i see in my mirror?
if not, DO something or shut up.
am i being cruel? YES!
tough-love.
go to HER and TALK to HER...........communication 100%.......do not pull punches..hold back nothing.

how do i do it?

I HAVE NO SECRETS !!!!!!!!!!!

i hide NOTHING. i tell my Mistress daily how i feel.

good luck to you..........and if you have-to? talk to me in email one on one.......

the ex-lonewolf..
veronica of ML---------------(Ms Laura)


_____________________________

drugs sex and rock n roll,...drugs are good and so is the rock n roll, sex is over rated"
=============
"go straight to hell, do not pass go and do not collect $200"



(in reply to jouet)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: want to break up with my Mistress - 11/26/2005 9:49:23 AM   
jamesthehumanrug


Posts: 668
Joined: 10/21/2005
Status: offline 		GREETINGS, JOUET(your name means play?!!!)
I HAVE NEVER BEEN ,IN ,THAT MESS.ONCE A VANILLA, BUT, I'M ALWAYS THE ONE LEFT ,THANKGOD,OR I LEAVE IMMEDIATELY ,OUT THE BATHROOM WINDOW;never WASTE MY TIME,
IF YOU DID'NT KNOW ,TILL SOMEONE-ELSE came along;ASK THE BIGGER DOM ,TO TAKE YOU ,AND ,KEEP HER FACE; DOM ,TO DOM,OR I DON'T KNOW SLAVE :YOU ARE ,IN CACA TROUBLE ,NOW....

_____________________________

I REMAIN RESPECTFULLY SUBMITTED
,LOVEles,
jamesthehumanrug

(in reply to jouet)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: want to break up with my Mistress - 11/26/2005 11:36:53 AM   
BeachBear


Posts: 30
Joined: 10/31/2005
Status: offline 		Be direct, be contrite (and you should be). With some compassion of her part, maybe your name won't be mud within your local community. There are`plenty of NSA Domme/sub relationships to be had out there, get involved with one of those, and stay away from the Dommes that need commitment, there are plenty of subs that needed THAT "spot" and you occupied it unecessarily.

good luck,

-b

(in reply to jouet)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: want to break up with my Mistress - 11/26/2005 12:29:15 PM   
candystripper


Posts: 3486
Joined: 11/1/2005
Status: offline 		i know this is an alien concept, but why not tell her the truth? If you knew going in she wanted a LTR and you did not (at least with her) then an apology is also in order.

Frankly i don't get the phone vs. in person deal, but the majority here seem to think in person is the only way, so i have no advice on venue any more.

candystripper

(in reply to BeachBear)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: want to break up with my Mistress - 11/26/2005 3:30:31 PM   
imtempting


Posts: 1280
Joined: 2/11/2005
Status: offline 		I do know how you feel. I want into a relationship with a girl when I was on the re-bound one time but it got to the point where I knew I had to tell her. As it was un-fair to her and myself to let it continue on.


@jamesthehumanrug
Can you please stop using commer's after every second word.

Makes what you write hard to read and others would feel the same....

< Message edited by imtempting -- 11/26/2005 3:32:14 PM >

(in reply to jouet)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: want to break up with my Mistress - 11/26/2005 3:40:33 PM   
michaelMI


Posts: 421
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline 		suppose there is a distance factor and one cannot beg to be released in person?

just curious.

(in reply to imtempting)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: want to break up with my Mistress - 11/26/2005 5:01:08 PM   
slave4mzpatti


Posts: 39
Joined: 10/20/2004
Status: offline 		How about "We need to talk". Be tact full and let her know its not her fault.

(in reply to jouet)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: want to break up with my Mistress - 11/26/2005 6:13:16 PM   
MHOO314


Posts: 3628
Joined: 9/26/2004
Status: offline 		No matter what end it, its no easier because its in the life---but some win and some lose--end it though with grace and dignity especially if She is in your area, as people in the life talk---

_____________________________

SLUTS: Southern Ladies Under Tremendous Stress...

Mistress Hathor


(in reply to jouet)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: want to break up with my Mistress - 11/27/2005 1:11:50 PM   
slavedesires


Posts: 669
Joined: 3/2/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: imtempting

I do know how you feel. I want into a relationship with a girl when I was on the re-bound one time but it got to the point where I knew I had to tell her. As it was un-fair to her and myself to let it continue on.


@jamesthehumanrug
Can you please stop using commer's after every second word.

Makes what you write hard to read and others would feel the same....


oh thank the gods!!!!!!!!! after 196 posts i was wondering if SOMEONE would say something about all those comma's and period's..damn, punctuations!!
At first i excused it cause i thought English was NOT his mother tongue.
It still might not be. Anyone have a grammar correcter program for him?

_____________________________

i speak only my personal opinion, sometimes O/ours.

"i am the keeper of fragile things and i have kept what is indisolvable."
....the greatest gift.....vulnerability

(in reply to imtempting)
Profile   Post #: 20
Page:   [1] 2   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive >> want to break up with my Mistress Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.094