goodpet
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Joined: 6/8/2005
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The List of Ten
Character Traits I strive to live by and how they are manifested in the person I seek to submit to.
(originally written 2001, not in any set order, not specific to any gender)
1. Secure with self.
He has be comfortable with who He is, His dominance, and His position. He should not be worried, jealous or fearful of my friends, past relationships, or vanilla life. He should be able to admit His faults, shortcomings, and ignorance of given things. He should be secure enough in his self to say He is sorry if He has made a mistake, and then move past it. He should be able to laugh at his self and appreciate when the laugh is on Him. He should be secure enough to live his life his way, not worried about image or what other think, but without the need to ‘prove a point’ or feel his needs supersedes the needs of others.
2. Integrity
The Master i seek to serve needs to be of high standards. i seek to live a life of quality and desire guidance and control from a Master who has standards even above my level. i seek a Master whose word is trusted and accepted by family, friends, and co-workers. He should follow the adage of “say what you mean and mean what you say.” He is reliable and you know you can depend on him. He should seek to always do right by His fellow man and live to the highest standards possible. His description should read like the Boy Scout code: Honesty, trustworthiness, helpful, kind, considerate, and so on. Integrity is also being honorable and doing the right thing. Standing up for your convictions and for those close to you and being willing to protect and defend your point of view, your self, your love ones, your household, your property. i seek a Master who will expect and demand a high standard of integrity from their submissive(s).
3. Honesty
This should be a given and is closely connected to integrity. Without honesty there will be no trust. If a Master is not honest about little daily things in His dealings with the slave or with others in His life, He will not be trusted in larger things. Honesty is the base from which a relationship grows and flourishes and trust is established. To extend a relationship to incorporate a Master/slave bond - trust is paramount. To extend the Master/slave relationship to include BDSM (especially any edge play) - trust is absolutely essential. If a Master is currently in a relationship they must be open and honest with their partner concerning my involvement, if they dishonest to their current partner, then I can only conclude they will be dishonest with me at some point also.
4. Self-management and stable
There is a song with a verse,” If he can’t run his own life, i’ll be damn if he’ll run mine!” This fits this trait so well. For me to feel confident in turning over control of all aspect of my life to someone, there needs to be a level of security and the knowledge He can manage my life in addition to His own. The Master should also be emotionally stable. There are times we all deal with issues in our lives and i am a very supportive person, but would want to at least start out knowing the one in charge of my life has dealt with His past, His issues and His needs and He is a stable person. He should not be burdened with a need for drugs or alcohol.
5. Experience and seriousness
This lifestyle is not a choice, or a game, a fling, or a curiosity for me. i view this lifestyle as more of an orientation then a choice. The Master should have at least a base level of experience so that He also is sure that this is the lifestyle He wants. i am not looking for a ‘bedroom’ Dom, but for the Total Power Exchange, the Master who can, and will, control all (total) areas of the relationship. This is not to be taken lightly. This is in reference to the M/s relationship itself and not to BDSM techniques. Techniques are learned, developed and improved on throughout the Master’s life. This is about knowing and embracing the lifestyle in general and being confident this is a lifestyle orientation that will endure. TPE, for me, does not mean micro-managed in ever little area but that the authority will be theirs, so they need to understand what that will involve, the time and effort it takes to be a Master full time, and not just be dominant only during play or sex.
6. Family/friends/Vanilla/lifestyle balance
In this lifestyle we live in a dual world. The mindset and bond of the Master and slave is presence at all time, however, behavior and functions are often vanilla in appearance. This is not easily done and takes dedication and a strong desire to balance these together. Establishing an environment that integrates community activities, social contacts, vocational obligations, faith observance, and family time assure that the whole person is healthy and functioning. Having friends in the lifestyle also enhances the relationship. Theses all need to be balanced under the primary acceptance of the Master/slave relationship. These outside factors are indeed needed and part of our whole being, but should never hinder nor interfere with the basic Master/slave unity.
7. Intellectual
i value the education of the mind and improvement of the intellect on an on going base. i seek to continue my intellectual improvement though reading, programs, education, and cultural exposure. The Master i seek should likewise value education and self-improvement. i do believe that a relationship functions better when there is a shared level of intelligence and education. Education comes in many forms, from the formal academic to life experiences, but the results are the improvement of the mind and the ability to relate to a variety of subjects and situations.
8. Adventuresome/Active
i am an active person, i love an adventure and there is little hesitation to try new things. Life is an adventure and i enjoy all it has to offer. i would rather be out playing a sport then watching it. The Master i seek should also be active and appreciate life’s offerings. It is important to have common activities but also for each to have their own pursuits, hobbies and vanilla activities. These outside activities helps to make each a well rounded persons and therefore more intriguing and interesting to the other person. The Master I seek should value, encourage and facilitate my participation in common interests and in my own.
9. Sexual attraction
With the desire to spend my life with someone and wanting to give my entirety to the Master i need to include the sexual/physical attraction. There should be sexual chemistry between the Master and slave. Having the physical/sexual attraction to the Master, and vice a versa, means the difference between having an intimate and loving aspect to sexual activities or a duty and chore to be endured. There should be an attraction and desire toward the other person, an excitement felt from being with the other person.
10. Humor
Life can be downright funny at time. There are too many things in life to enjoy and laughter fills my life. i do not want that aspect of my life to change, nor do i think i could change that part of myself. A quick wit, ability to spin a yarn, puns needing to be punished, satire and parodies allow for a mental break from the daily seriousness we live and function in. Humor is large part of my life and i seek the Master who appreciates my ability to see the lighter side of life and understands the difference between humor and disrespect.
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RE: what do you look for - 
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