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RE: Childish dom's pretending to be adults. - 9/12/2008 10:34:56 AM   
JerryFrankster


Posts: 188
Joined: 2/15/2008
Status: offline 		There are places where it is illegal to not answer your phone?

I could see it if it were a case of parole or house arrest, but otherwise I just don't see how it could even be a law.


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Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Childish dom's pretending to be adults. - 9/12/2008 10:44:55 AM   
MAMandSlave


Posts: 110
Joined: 8/15/2008
Status: offline 		Realistically any large group of people is going to have cliques. We had a similar situation, and chose to remove ourself from that group. We have been fortunate to have meet other friends in the scene, get to know them and develop strong friendships and relationships. Asking for help setting limits is an excellent idea. Remember that all you need to do in the long term is show who you really are, and allow the group to see that it is nicer to be around someone respectful than an abusive person.

(in reply to JerryFrankster)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Childish dom's pretending to be adults. - 9/12/2008 10:49:20 AM   
RealSub58


Posts: 1073
Status: offline 		I read through .dark's. response and had to look at the op's profile.
 
Stated age is 18.  Joined: 04/27/06
                           Last online: 9/11/08
 
Does this both anyone else?
Or does our age always stay the same,
unless we change it.  unsure how collarme works in this department

(in reply to BiteGirl)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Childish dom's pretending to be adults. - 9/12/2008 10:56:19 AM   
suhlut


Posts: 622
Joined: 7/20/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RealSub58

I read through .dark's. response and had to look at the op's profile.
 
Stated age is 18.  Joined: 04/27/06
                           Last online: 9/11/08
 
Does this both anyone else?
Or does our age always stay the same,
unless we change it.  unsure how collarme works in this department


you have to manually change the age by editing profile,  i think lots don't, because of the length of time for the profile to be available after every change.

< Message edited by suhlut -- 9/12/2008 10:57:15 AM >

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Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Childish dom's pretending to be adults. - 9/12/2008 11:08:00 AM   
subeos


Posts: 140
Joined: 5/23/2008
Status: offline
quote:

its not about blocking people.  yea granted they started some type of dialogue but at what point is it ok to disrespect or even act childish when you are rejected.  At some point the level of respect should be mutural.  "knowning that some are not mature"  how much bs do a person have to take when they are rejected.  this goes back the the post that i added last night.


And that is why that post got deleted!

Learn to block, delete and move on. It's hard  but it can be done. Good luck Bitegirl

slave eos

(in reply to eyesopened)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Childish dom's pretending to be adults. - 9/12/2008 11:19:56 AM   
variation30


Posts: 1190
Joined: 12/1/2007
From: Alabama
Status: offline 		hm. I thought this thread was about me.

"as he's the dom, he's suppose to ask, right?"

granted, the American Dom Association has been debating threesome ediquette for some time now but the consensus established at our last meeting in Boulder, Colorodo was that yes, it is encouraged for the dom to take the initiative when requesting threesoms.


"" very very disapointed in your comment yesterday, i have deleted you from my msn, no longer accepting dialouge with you, all the best in your search""

oh shit, did he take you off his myspace friends too? some people are just cruel.

" How would you deal with someone like this?"

ignore him is a great start. and if you do run into him and he starts this up, be very...undiplomatic. it gets the point across to males much more clearly.

< Message edited by variation30 -- 9/12/2008 11:20:30 AM >

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Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Childish dom's pretending to be adults. - 9/12/2008 12:43:27 PM   
eyesopened


Posts: 2798
Joined: 6/12/2006
From: Tampa, FL
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: JerryFrankster

There are places where it is illegal to not answer your phone?

I could see it if it were a case of parole or house arrest, but otherwise I just don't see how it could even be a law.



It's called sarcasm because everyone knows it's not against the law...therefore there should not be anything to hinder a person from ignoring the phone or simply deleting emails without reading or responding.  The OP wants the Dom to leave her alone yet she seemed compelled to respond to his email as though to not respond would have some dire consequence.

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(in reply to JerryFrankster)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Childish dom's pretending to be adults. - 9/12/2008 12:50:38 PM   
candystripper


Posts: 3486
Joined: 11/1/2005
Status: offline 		BiteGirl, don't shrink from your local scene.  Hold up your head, be yourself, refuse to discuss what happened, and if he grinds the rumor mill, it will be apparent after awhile he's grinding it alone.  It happens a lot and I imagine by now people are pretty committed to making up their own minds.
 
candystripper 

(in reply to BiteGirl)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Childish dom's pretending to be adults. - 9/12/2008 1:33:32 PM   
littlesarbonn


Posts: 1710
Joined: 12/3/2005
From: Stockton, California
Status: offline 		Unfortunately, it does happen, and sometimes there's little you can do about it but just grin and move forward, knowing time will straighten all things out. When I first got into the scene, I had only had a few partners before this very exotic woman took some effort to contact me through friends. I was just becoming known as a sincere lifestyler, and she was looking for that in her current dynamic. Up until this time she was a HEAVY player that was known by EVERYONE, and she was so damn attractive that everyone wanted to be around her. So, she arranged coffee for the two of us at this little coffee shop, and after about ten minutes of conversation where apparently I said everything right, she produced a contract and told me I would need to sign it before we left each other for the day. Yeah, first time I met her in person. I said I definitely wasn't going to sign a one year slavery contract to someone I've had zero interaction with until our first cup of coffee. Then, ignoring that comment, she began to explain how this relationship would play out (apparently, she wanted someone to do all of her cooking, cleaning, etc. and to not get in her way because she would actually be seeking out her bdsm stuff from the many other guys who she liked to play with...in other words, I'd be completely a service slave to her, but I was to expect NO INTERACTION whatsoever. I wouldn't have been surprised if she would have designated a special entrance for me to enter her place so she would never have to see me.

So, I said I wasn't interested. And our coffee went straight downhill from there. A few days later, I found out she was telling everyone she knew (which was a LOT of people) how disrespectful I was. For a long time, I had a hard time integrating myself back into the community that I hadn't yet really set up a reputation yet. But over the years, I did.


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(in reply to BiteGirl)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Childish dom's pretending to be adults. - 9/12/2008 2:41:52 PM   
Evility


Posts: 915
Joined: 12/19/2007
Status: offline
quote:

How do I get him to leave me alone? I wrote him back


That's not the way to go about it.

(in reply to BiteGirl)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Childish dom's pretending to be adults. - 9/12/2008 3:19:54 PM   
babbblin


Posts: 18
Joined: 3/4/2006
Status: offline 		Howdy Bitegirl,
  i deal with idiots all the time.  Collarme, yahoo, work, walmart.....everywhere.  i have even had a real life stalker.  The real life stalker is hard to ignore and to deal with.....
  Idiots online are the easiest and quickest to dismiss.  Ignore, delete, forget.  If you have the displeasure of seeing them in real life just ignore.  You know you have done nothing wrong and their issues belong soley to them.  This really isn't "rock"et science.

(in reply to eyesopened)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Childish dom's pretending to be adults. - 9/12/2008 3:27:38 PM   
beargonewild


Posts: 22716
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BiteGirl

Ignoring them sounds easy but they (from what I hear) are bitchy about people they don't like in the scene, and I don't want to now become an outsider, although I suppose people who would befriend people like this can't really be worth talking to anyway.

I'm just worried about things being wrecked for me before I even have a chance to get out there and socialize and learn more.



One of the best ways to deal with stuff like that is to maintain your integrity and don't lower yourself to the same level as the name bashers. It won't take long for others to see that you are not lowering yourself to that level and shows you have a high level of maturity.

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Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Childish dom's pretending to be adults. - 9/12/2008 3:43:42 PM   
babbblin


Posts: 18
Joined: 3/4/2006
Status: offline 		never never never never write back to someone who is obviously childish and an idiot.  you may be pissed or want to shoot back with a wise crack...but just chew some gum or sneeze or something and i promise the feeling will pass.  people like that are only good for a laugh....nothing else.

(in reply to beargonewild)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Childish dom's pretending to be adults. - 9/12/2008 5:14:55 PM   
Pyrrsefanie


Posts: 1222
Joined: 9/18/2007
From: NEW HAMPSHAAAAAAH!
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: babbblin
you may be pissed or want to shoot back with a wise crack...but just chew some gum or sneeze or something and i promise the feeling will pass.


There ain't enough chewing gum in the world for me...

Just call me Pyrrsefanie, Ruiner of Days.


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Read my series, Taking Jessica, on http://www.akashaweb.com !

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Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Childish dom's pretending to be adults. - 9/12/2008 5:42:22 PM   
NumberSix


Posts: 1378
Joined: 12/30/2006
Status: offline 		I..................

as a childish dom

Like making 'tend sometimes............

6

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Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Childish dom's pretending to be adults. - 9/12/2008 5:51:20 PM   
IvyMorgan


Posts: 729
Joined: 7/5/2007
From: Midlands, UK
Status: offline 		I find being especially polite and pleasant to people who you know have been bitching about you (to your friends, ffs, as if you won't find out!) most satisfying.

I appreciate not everyone is like me.

Block, ignore, delete, no responding... but it does sound like he's already leaving you alone, OP.

(in reply to NumberSix)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Childish dom's pretending to be adults. - 9/12/2008 5:58:55 PM   
persephonee


Posts: 5089
Joined: 12/15/2007
Status: offline 		bg~
i started reading this thread and then got to doing other things and so i havent read all the replies...but i can tell from the ones i did read that you are giving this one person wayyy too much power.

The community you are worried that he will ruin for you is small...im assuming as most of our communities are small, inbred and full of politics and gossipmongers. No one can ruin your community for you. If you see him out and about...ignore him. Let the leader of the group/munch know that you had issues...dont go into details and be the calm voice of reason and they will protect you if necessary. If you are at the dungeon, let the DM know that you need to be watched and they will watch you.

Its hard to stand your ground especially when youre in the mindset to submit...but this is a real person who is not someone you wish to speak to or deal with. You are going to have to just put yer big girl panties on and deal with this situation now while its not a real issue. Chances are hes full of shit and wont even talk to you in public...if you can show him somehow thru body language or sheer numbers of people you are surrounded by that you are not alone and on the edge of the herd....hell chicken out.

Remember...hes just a guy at the core of it....and you are your own person.


If you can....do you have "the look"....that face you make when you wont be fucked with?? If you have kids you have the look. If you have subordinates at work you have the look. Take it out and practice. Hell back down. Bullies always do.

edit to add...with eyes lowered, that this girl does not think that all guys are bullies and that this girl would never ever "give the look" to a weal and twue dominant.

< Message edited by persephonee -- 9/12/2008 6:08:06 PM >

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Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Childish dom's pretending to be adults. - 9/12/2008 6:32:06 PM   
angelslave77


Posts: 478
Joined: 5/14/2007
Status: offline 		FFS the community she is in is one of the largest in OZ with several different groups operating within it.

can anyone say DRAMA QUEEN

(in reply to persephonee)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Childish dom's pretending to be adults. - 9/13/2008 7:00:37 AM   
LATEXBABY64


Posts: 2107
Joined: 4/8/2004
Status: offline 		i am sorry i just wuld not trust anyone with beating my butt unless they had some life experince
that means 27 and older  wet be hind the ears trying to figure out which end of the crop to use is not cool for me lol

(in reply to angelslave77)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Childish dom's pretending to be adults. - 9/13/2008 7:05:45 AM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline
quote:

Ignore them. Is it really that hard to figure out?


Evidently.


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Profile   Post #: 40
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