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No sex for slaves - 9/17/2008 10:40:34 AM   
subeos


Posts: 140
Joined: 5/23/2008
Status: offline 		Today I got a CM message from a Dom stating that he in the 7 yrs that he's been in BDSM had never had sex with his slaves.
Now, sex is not everything , I understand. But I am not sure I understand why a Dom or male would do that. And ideas?

slave eos

~To thine Own Self Be True~
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RE: No sex for slaves - 9/17/2008 10:42:20 AM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
Status: offline 		Have you considered asking the dominant in question?
Anything else is just second guessing.
 
the.dark.

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RE: No sex for slaves - 9/17/2008 10:44:17 AM   
faerytattoodgirl


Posts: 5824
Status: offline
quote:

And ideas?


he cant get it up????


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RE: No sex for slaves - 9/17/2008 10:46:19 AM   
leadership527


Posts: 5026
Joined: 6/2/2008
Status: offline 		Sure, what's so hard to understand.  For the dominant in question, the authority dynamic itself *IS* the deal.  Obviously, that's a very different relationship dynamic than one built on either kinky SM sex or a loving intimate relationship.  But in the end, it's just another chocolate/vanilla sort of thing.

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RE: No sex for slaves - 9/17/2008 10:47:11 AM   
Lynnxz


Posts: 4813
Joined: 10/3/2006
From: Atlanta
Status: offline 		I think I'll go with faery on this one. 

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RE: No sex for slaves - 9/17/2008 10:47:11 AM   
subeos


Posts: 140
Joined: 5/23/2008
Status: offline 		I just did that, and should have asked before I posted. He rather let other Masters or male slaves to use his slaves. I thought maybe he was impotent. 

slave eos

~To Thine Own ASelf Be True~

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RE: No sex for slaves - 9/17/2008 10:48:06 AM   
Mercnbeth


Posts: 11766
Status: offline 		not everyone is wired for intercourse the same as the next person, regardless of gender or relationship role.
 
some folks don't get sexual with certain folks they have relationships with...and for some, an M/s relationship does not include sex.

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RE: No sex for slaves - 9/17/2008 10:48:24 AM   
monywildcat


Posts: 452
Joined: 2/26/2008
Status: offline 		He can't get it up...hee!  BTW love the new pic, Faery...too cute!

You could always ask the guy what's up with that.  I played with a dom a while back, that was very upfront about not having sex with his subs/slaves until he decided to collar them.  Needless to say, that did not last. 

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RE: No sex for slaves - 9/17/2008 10:57:04 AM   
BOUNTYHUNTER


Posts: 9259
Joined: 2/5/2004
Status: offline 		One of the best slaves I have ever owned was a lez girl, she hated my guts but yet loved me for what I had to offer her..The only time sex was involved was during rought s/m sessions and then only as humilation,,WE owned a male slave for years and never was an sex involved he was just a service slut...There are and can be m/s relationships without sex...I for one wouldn't want to screw every woman that comes my way, just call me ol' fashion if you must...

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RE: No sex for slaves - 9/17/2008 11:06:04 AM   
subeos


Posts: 140
Joined: 5/23/2008
Status: offline 		Funny, I had to put him on ignore. All that talk about fucking was driving me nuts...LOL... I still think a bigger issues is at hand. And if that is what he chooses that is good for him. I just feel that it is a odd way to start a conversation. But then again, I sometimes like to see where peoples heads are. Thanks for the input.  Oh none of that.....LOL...

slave eos

~To Thine Own Self Be True~

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RE: No sex for slaves - 9/17/2008 11:30:52 AM   
OttersSwim


Posts: 2860
Joined: 9/1/2008
Status: offline 		I used to know a woman who was once a nun.

I asked her why she wasn't still a nun.

She replied that she finally figured out what Nun meant!

No sex can be a hard way to go in any pursuit...


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RE: No sex for slaves - 9/17/2008 11:57:08 AM   
CallaFirestormBW


Posts: 3651
Joined: 6/29/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: subeos

Today I got a CM message from a Dom stating that he in the 7 yrs that he's been in BDSM had never had sex with his slaves.
Now, sex is not everything , I understand. But I am not sure I understand why a Dom or male would do that. And ideas?

slave eos

~To thine Own Self Be True~



I don't have sex with our servants. When I was a servant, sex wasn't a part of my service until I was brought into the inner ring of our household as a mate. That doesn't mean that what I do isn't -sensual-... there is a LOT of sensory intensity involved in WIITWD... but sex... not a part of the package for me. Then again, I have monkish tendencies and express my sexuality more through ritual, blood, flame, and art.

Calla Firestorm


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Said to me recently: "Look, I know you're the "voice of reason"... but dammit, I LIKE being unreasonable!!!!"

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Profile   Post #: 12
RE: No sex for slaves - 9/17/2008 11:59:53 AM   
opposingtwilight


Posts: 684
Joined: 6/13/2008
Status: offline 		My former owners kept me for five years and never had sex with me. It just wasn't part of our relationship.

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Profile   Post #: 13
RE: No sex for slaves - 9/17/2008 12:08:51 PM   
faerytattoodgirl


Posts: 5824
Status: offline 		its funny hearing all these non sexual relationships...and yet...why the hell isnt anyone writing me??? my key issue is: not based on sex since i cant actually have it anyway.

guess the % of people who dont want sex is just too small a pool. 




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I did not reply to your cmail.
I am flawed.
Imperfect.
MUST SPANK!!!
SPAAAAAAAANK!!!

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RE: No sex for slaves - 9/17/2008 12:10:19 PM   
opposingtwilight


Posts: 684
Joined: 6/13/2008
Status: offline 		I did write to you, faery.

You bit my head off and I quietly gave up ...

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RE: No sex for slaves - 9/17/2008 12:12:40 PM   
faerytattoodgirl


Posts: 5824
Status: offline 		i was hungry.

_____________________________

I did not reply to your cmail.
I am flawed.
Imperfect.
MUST SPANK!!!
SPAAAAAAAANK!!!

(in reply to opposingtwilight)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: No sex for slaves - 9/17/2008 12:12:57 PM   
Missokyst


Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline 		Maybe it cant rise to the occasion? 
Seriously, I have played with men without having penetrative sex. 
Some of those men had erectile issues. 
But over a long term relationship, if I was with someone who never had sex with me I would be asking him to see a doctor for a penile implant. 
Kyst

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Profile   Post #: 17
RE: No sex for slaves - 9/17/2008 2:11:57 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		I can understand it if it's a poly relationship but only if the sub can have his/her needs met elsewhere.

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Cynical and proud of it!


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RE: No sex for slaves - 9/17/2008 2:18:42 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		It doesn't sound like he has relationships with his slave. They are just his slaves..not his partner, not his wife, not his girlfriend..just his slave and in that dynamic then it makes sense he wouldn't have sex with them.
They're there to just do what he wants to make his life easier...that's it.
If he DID have sex with them then it would be for his own amusement, enjoyment and orgasm..not their's. Their's is of no concern to him from the sounds of it.
Slaves to him are for one purpose only...to use in whatever way makes his life simpler.

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Profile   Post #: 19
RE: No sex for slaves - 9/17/2008 2:23:35 PM   
servantheart


Posts: 960
Joined: 10/26/2006
From: Houston, TX
Status: offline 		~fast reply~
 
 
One or both may be atttempting to meet their kink needs outside a vanilla marriage without breaking their vows. 
 
 

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When you really trust someone, you have to be okay with not understanding some things.
~Real Live Preacher, Real Live Preacher weblog, 07-08-04; Anonymous author of RealLivePreacher.com

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Profile   Post #: 20
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