RE: Born Or Created?

RE: Born Or Created? (Full Version)

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randsboy -> RE: Born Or Created? (2/26/2006 7:50:59 PM)
As to the original question of born or created- i believe that a true sub/slave is born a slave and looks for his Master once he is of age. i believe that i was born both gay and a slave in need of a loving Master. And BDSM is to be a part of that. All i know that i am not a leader, i am one who thrills at being totally naked, collar and order around by my Master. Master and i have been together for 7+ years and i can not concieve of this ever changing.

Vancouver_cinful -> RE: Born Or Created? (2/26/2006 9:14:31 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MojoRisin is a person born submissive? or is it a way of being that is created through experience? I truly feel I am genetically programmed to be submissive, although, I don't believe it's a clearcut question of nature vs nurture but rather a complicated mix of both. I see it in my sister and my father, who unknowingly have D/s relationships. (I assume they are unaware, but I may be wrong.) I can look back to my earliest years and see evidence of my submissive nature. I also feel it took acknowledging and acting upon my submissive nature for me to truly become happy with who I am, and life in general. (Although I've always been a fairly content person.) I assume, however, that this is true for me, but not necessarily for everyone. Cin

ownedgirlie -> RE: Born Or Created? (2/26/2006 11:33:45 PM)
Like cinful, i am genetically predisposed. At least i am assuming that is the case, and my upbringing fostered it. i have two sisters - one who is submissive to her husband under the "guise" of the church, and my other sister it too busy fighting it to recognize it. One of my brothers also has a submissive nature about him as well. Two of my cousins are submissive also. we're just one big submissive family, lol.

novacaine -> RE: Born Or Created? (2/27/2006 3:58:06 AM)
Well, I'm quite sure that one is born with a natural tendency to be dominant or submissive, it definately needs to be nurtured out of someone in some cases. I'm fairly sure I was born with a dominant tendency, but people and experiences have certainly brought it out of me.

slaveladyj -> RE: Born Or Created? (2/27/2006 4:20:03 AM)
I'm not really sure, there are incidents in my childhood that I can point to and say, this is what turned me into a pain slut. But a few things actually occurred before the major incident that makes me suspect I was always of a submissive nature. My problem lies that in my vanilla life, I'm a take charge type of girl. The two aspects are fighting each other right now, leaving me one confused person. But maybe that's another thread.

angelic -> RE: Born Or Created? (2/27/2006 5:18:05 AM)
i was born this way, i just didn't know there was a name for it when growing up. :) Also it's the reason that i don't call this a 'lifestyle', for me it's a way of life.

RavenMuse -> RE: Born Or Created? (2/27/2006 5:22:36 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: slaveladyj My problem lies that in my vanilla life, I'm a take charge type of girl. The two aspects are fighting each other right now, leaving me one confused person. But maybe that's another thread. Hmmmm Confident, out-going and in charge outside of the relationship, submissive within it... you could well have just described the young lady I am currently interested in. She doesn't seem to find it confusing and nor do I. What is confusing you about it? I don't buy into the image that some seem to have that submissive=weak could the confusion be coming from you doing so to a certain degree?

ownedgirlie -> RE: Born Or Created? (2/27/2006 7:11:06 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: slaveladyj My problem lies that in my vanilla life, I'm a take charge type of girl. The two aspects are fighting each other right now, leaving me one confused person. But maybe that's another thread. i used to struggle with this too, until i learned to understand it. However, my strength for the rest of the world comes from my submission to him. It seems the deeper i go with him, the stronger i am. Those who know me in my "vanilla" life would be shocked at how submissive i am. Where i became weak is when i tried to be submissive to everything, thinking that was the right thing to do, and desperately needing a place to express that submission. i realized i needed ONE place to put all of it (god, and i mean all of it), and once that was established, my internal strength began to grow.

krikket -> RE: Born Or Created? (2/27/2006 8:18:00 AM)
i think, for myself, it's both. Just as one of my unmentionables was born shy, i was born submissive in nature -- well, mostly..lol. It's only been as an adult that i came to understand that and seek ways to express it and to nurture it. Of course, i've also had to teach myself to be more assertive, to display what some "domme" tendencies even though i don't consider myself a domme. We're all individuals, and i suspect that it's different within each of us..in all flavors. cheers jimini

PenelopePitstop -> RE: Born Or Created? (2/27/2006 9:21:01 AM)
I was definitely born this way, some of my earliest memories are of submission, and I can remember quite a long way back.

slaveladyj -> RE: Born Or Created? (2/27/2006 12:02:47 PM)
The problem lies in the fact that my partner is not into the lifestyle. Now, I do my best to wait on him hand and foot, to serve him, but that's merely because that's the way I am. I was raised a man's home is his castle, and a woman's place is to cater to his needs. However, my spouse does not treat me as a slave at all, so these feelings and needs go unmet, except through internet play. My spouse simply expects me to take care of everything, and I do. My children expect me to take care of everything, and I do, in my professional life, others expect me to take care of everything and I do. If someone has a problem, they come to me to solve it. The only time I get to be submissive is online. The desire is growing to intense portions. Sooner or later, I'm gonna crack under the pressure.

RavenMuse -> RE: Born Or Created? (2/27/2006 12:31:45 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: slaveladyj The problem lies in the fact that my partner is not into the lifestyle. Now, I do my best to wait on him hand and foot, to serve him, but that's merely because that's the way I am. I was raised a man's home is his castle, and a woman's place is to cater to his needs. However, my spouse does not treat me as a slave at all, so these feelings and needs go unmet, except through internet play. My spouse simply expects me to take care of everything, and I do. My children expect me to take care of everything, and I do, in my professional life, others expect me to take care of everything and I do. If someone has a problem, they come to me to solve it. The only time I get to be submissive is online. The desire is growing to intense portions. Sooner or later, I'm gonna crack under the pressure. Ah OK that I can understand and sympathise with. Trying to deal with such feelings when there seems to be no way to realise them isn't an easy situation to be in.

typesgirl -> RE: Born Or Created? (2/27/2006 12:34:06 PM)
This is just my opinion...for me it was not innate. I was not born submissive nor was I raised in any way to be submissive. I think my life choices created a need for balance and submission fills that need. That being said, I don't think it would have ever been expressed if I hadn't met Master. He brings out the sub in me :) typesgirl

talltxsub -> RE: Born Or Created? (2/27/2006 12:34:06 PM)
As with many things, it must be a combination. Take the situation (as mine) of a person with a strong personality, dominant in most areas of life, but with a burning desire/need to serve. Some of it comes from the complexities of life, but some comes from experiences as a child of being coerced/seduced into compromising and submissive positions and situations.

Submotive -> RE: Born Or Created? (2/27/2006 12:35:19 PM)
Very interesting post. i believe my submission is part of me, who i am, my personality, my desires, my drives. But over the years much of my need to express it became hidden by the demands of a world that promotes aggression, power and drive. Now, i seek to feel my submissiveness again, to see her and experience her and i look to my Master to touch her and grow her and train her in her completeness.

cindyxdresser -> RE: Born Or Created? (1/6/2008 2:25:45 AM)
I truelly believe we are born submissive,I have always wanted to serve ,and have tried being dominant ,but couldnt do it

trainedobedients -> RE: Born Or Created? (1/6/2008 2:42:47 AM)
I can only talk for myself but I was born submissive. It was over the years not always apparent and sometimes hidden deep, but looking back it was always there. And it is only when it let it blossom and dwelled in it that I finally felt home and good about myself. To me submissiveness reaches beyond the bedroom and to me is a 24/7 thing.

kuuntuli -> RE: Born Or Created? (1/6/2008 9:41:24 AM)
I'm not sure.I think I was born this way, I've desired to be submissive as long as I can remember, and desired to please people. But it could be that there's just been things in my life that have made me this way. But it doesn't really matter. This is how I'm happy.

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