Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

Restfully begging out of a collar as painlessly as possible


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> Restfully begging out of a collar as painlessly as possible Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
Restfully begging out of a collar as painlessly as poss... - 12/5/2005 6:26:14 AM   
michaelMI


Posts: 421
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline 		what is the least hurtful way to beg out of a collar when you still car for someone, yet time, real life and distance has gotten in the way?

i still care for my Mistress, but we have drifted apart as neither of us is onlineat the same time and i just can't devote the time needed to keep this relationship alive.
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Restfully begging out of a collar as painlessly as ... - 12/5/2005 6:27:08 AM   
orfunboi


Posts: 1223
Joined: 10/22/2005
Status: offline 		i would say be honest and explain your feelings...she may be feeling the same way.

(in reply to michaelMI)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Restfully begging out of a collar as painlessly as ... - 12/5/2005 6:29:34 AM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline 		complete honesty...

(in reply to michaelMI)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Restfully begging out of a collar as painlessly as ... - 12/5/2005 6:29:45 AM   
Jasmyn


Posts: 1234
Joined: 2/6/2004
From: New Zealand
Status: offline 		Sorry to hear that michael :(

Been straight up tends to work best in most situations, even ones as delicate and gutwrenching as something like this can be. Simply ask her and give her the reasons you have given us.

Best of luck.

_____________________________

quote:

"To learn the art of submission a slave must first give up the desires that drew him to submission in the first place." Mistress Jasmyn Jan 2005.


Visit My Website


(in reply to michaelMI)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Restfully begging out of a collar as painlessly as ... - 12/5/2005 7:09:59 AM   
MHOO314


Posts: 3628
Joined: 9/26/2004
Status: offline 		I'm a little confused, is this a real time relationship? or online only? if its rt, then a phone call is in order--as everyone said, honesty--its hard, no one wants to let some one down, but its worse to continue--

if its online, then I imagine you have to send Her an email to at least set a time for chatting--again as face 2 face as can be accomplished--

_____________________________

SLUTS: Southern Ladies Under Tremendous Stress...

Mistress Hathor


(in reply to michaelMI)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Restfully begging out of a collar as painlessly as ... - 12/5/2005 7:15:29 AM   
OscarHargraves


Posts: 693
Joined: 8/9/2005
Status: offline 		Be honest; be straight forward. Tell her your feelings and tell her that it's over. Don't forget to thank her for all that you've learned from her. You might also follow up with a nice hand written Thank You card or Christmas card in about a week. Nothing mushy or persoanl, just a card with a note in it.

_____________________________

Never drive faster than your guardian angel can fly ! !

(in reply to michaelMI)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Restfully begging out of a collar as painlessly as ... - 12/5/2005 8:19:19 AM   
fldrkhorse


Posts: 158
Joined: 11/5/2005
From: North Carolina
Status: offline 		The answer to your question is there is no "least hurtful" way to end a relationship. The responses here about being honest and not letting it drag on are good advice. There's another post, I think by Wind Chymes, where she talks about communication. Neither of you never should have let it go so far to become hurtful.

_____________________________

I'm not where I need to be, but I'm better than I was yesterday.

Namaste, I honor the divine in you

(in reply to michaelMI)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Restfully begging out of a collar as painlessly as ... - 12/5/2005 11:27:47 AM   
MistressOfGa


Posts: 2929
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelMI

what is the least hurtful way to beg out of a collar when you still car for someone, yet time, real life and distance has gotten in the way?

i still care for my Mistress, but we have drifted apart as neither of us is onlineat the same time and i just can't devote the time needed to keep this relationship alive.


michael, for what it is worth, I am so very sorry it has come down to that. I understand completely. I agree with everyone here. Communication is the key. I have recently lost a sub, so I know the pain it will cause, but I also know that it is something that had to be done on his part. Good luck to you.

_____________________________





(in reply to michaelMI)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Restfully begging out of a collar as painlessly as ... - 12/5/2005 12:37:37 PM   
MsSonnetMarwood


Posts: 1898
Joined: 2/10/2005
From: Eastern Shore, Maryland
Status: offline
quote:

what is the least hurtful way to beg out of a collar when you still car for someone, yet time, real life and distance has gotten in the way?

i still care for my Mistress, but we have drifted apart as neither of us is onlineat the same time and i just can't devote the time needed to keep this relationship alive.



If I recall correctly from your previous posts, your relationship is primarily online although you did meet her about a year ago, or something like that.

Be honest, upfront, and quick about it. A phone call would be in order, rather than an email.

_____________________________

~Ms. Sonnet Marwood~

Deja Moo: The feeling you've heard this bull somewhere before.

(in reply to michaelMI)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Restfully begging out of a collar as painlessly as ... - 12/5/2005 1:19:08 PM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

If I recall correctly from your previous posts, your relationship is primarily online although you did meet her about a year ago, or something like that.

Be honest, upfront, and quick about it. A phone call would be in order, rather than an email.


I agree. A phone call would be what I would do. But above all, maintain honesty about why.


(in reply to MsSonnetMarwood)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Restfully begging out of a collar as painlessly as ... - 12/5/2005 1:23:31 PM   
CamaroGuy2001


Posts: 8
Joined: 10/22/2005
Status: offline 		Honisty, clarity, and finaly talking directly to Her is the most important.

(in reply to IrishMist)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Restfully begging out of a collar as painlessly as ... - 12/5/2005 3:51:47 PM   
fyreredsub


Posts: 3403
Joined: 10/7/2005
Status: offline 		taking one's own destiny back is never easy,good luck.just be honest

_____________________________

"Accordingly, men must then either fulfill their nature, or deny it, and in denying their nature, deny us ours, for ours is the complement to theirs. " Renegades

(in reply to michaelMI)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Restfully begging out of a collar as painlessly as ... - 12/5/2005 3:56:52 PM   
sweetpettjenny


Posts: 674
Joined: 11/7/2004
Status: offline 		just be honest....

(in reply to michaelMI)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Restfully begging out of a collar as painlessly as ... - 12/5/2005 5:18:47 PM   
LadyJulieAnn


Posts: 979
Joined: 6/29/2005
Status: offline 		I was in the same situation a couple of years ago, but I was the one to make the difficult decision to end the D/s relationship after a year online together. My guess is that your Mistress is feeling the same as you are as far as not having that time together online to dedicate to the relationship. I would suggest communicating your feelings to her, just as you have in your posting. In my situation, we both realized that we were just giving lip service to the relationship, and we both knew it wasn't fair to each other to continue in something that needed strong bonding and communication. We still remain friends, for which I am grateful.

I wish you luck,
Julie

(in reply to michaelMI)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Restfully begging out of a collar as painlessly as ... - 12/5/2005 6:05:13 PM   
mnottertail


Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline 		obfuscate, obfuscate, obfuscate ........ deny, deny, deny......... (works well for me in a business setting).

Or, do the rightest thing you can for all. Which is face it and live with it.

Ron

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30


(in reply to LadyJulieAnn)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Restfully begging out of a collar as painlessly as ... - 12/5/2005 6:11:06 PM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		chiming in........please be honest

_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to mnottertail)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Restfully begging out of a collar as painlessly as ... - 12/6/2005 1:02:45 PM   
Synocense


Posts: 255
Joined: 8/8/2004
Status: offline 		A phone call, perhaps something like, "Dear Mistress, I feel we have drifted apart as neither of us is online at the same time and I just can't devote the time needed to keep this relationship alive...."

Best of luck to you,

Syn


_____________________________

Before you speak, ask yourself..
Is it kind? Is it true? Is it necessary?
Does it improve upon the silence?

(in reply to michaelMI)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Restfully begging out of a collar as painlessly as ... - 12/6/2005 2:49:38 PM   
ExistentialSteel


Posts: 676
Joined: 1/18/2005
Status: offline 		To take a slightly different view, things like this have a way of working themselves out with time and avoidance. You could gradually stop making contact until finally neither is talking. It just comes to the point where you both realize it has happened. Although everyone says tell the other and break it off with honesty and rapidly, I'm willing to bet my way happens much more often.

_____________________________

For those who are like Roman Candles leaving bright trails in the night sky while the crowd watches until the dark blue center light bursts into magnificent colors and the crowd goes, ahhhhhhhhhh.

(in reply to Synocense)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Restfully begging out of a collar as painlessly as ... - 12/6/2005 4:07:35 PM   
HouseofBear


Posts: 1280
Joined: 2/9/2005
Status: offline 		It seems that what you posted here was explained fairly well. Tell her the same thing you told us. If possibe do it via phone if you do not have a way of doing it in person. If it is an on-line only relationship, do it via chat if possible.

(in reply to ExistentialSteel)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Restfully begging out of a collar as painlessly as ... - 12/6/2005 4:23:15 PM   
kyraofMists


Posts: 3292
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline 		Okay.. I just have to share this. I have been reading this thread since it started and the subject line always confused me, "Restfully begging out of a collar..." I couldn't figure out what being rested had to do with ending a relationship. It just hit me that the word is suppose to be "respectfully" lol At least I can laugh at myself when I am being dense.

As for the OP, as many have said it is best to just be honest. The end of a relationship is difficult on all sides, but ending it honestly and without lies will have the most positive impact.

Knight's kyra

Edited to add that no offense was meant to the OP and I it is not my intention to make light of a difficult situation; I am just poking a little fun at myself.



< Message edited by kyraofMists -- 12/6/2005 4:27:39 PM >

(in reply to michaelMI)
Profile   Post #: 20
Page:   [1] 2   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> Restfully begging out of a collar as painlessly as possible Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.094