master ignores after claiming (Full Version)

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forhim -> master ignores after claiming (10/4/2008 9:03:20 PM)

my master just announced his taking of me on his profile but has not answered my emails, seen me or spoken to me all weekend

hes not interested right?

why bother to change the profile then?



littlewonder -> RE: master ignores after claiming (10/4/2008 9:13:50 PM)

One weekend???

Honey, maybe he's simply busy.






tsatske -> RE: master ignores after claiming (10/4/2008 9:19:42 PM)

and maybe he should not have 'claimed' a long distance sub and immedeatly gotten 'busy' without an explanaiton.
When a guy takes you out and does not call you all the next week, do you say, 'well, maybe he's busy?'
If you are interested in starting a relationship, you put energy into the front end, where you are getting to know each other.
If he is too busy for you while you are his new toy, that does not bode well for the future.



VivaciousSub -> RE: master ignores after claiming (10/4/2008 9:20:21 PM)

While it would have been perhaps a good idea for him to communicate the fact he was or was going to be busy or unavailable, I would stop reading all sorts of evil messages into his not contacting you. We're not even to SUNDAY yet!

Life happens, sweetie, even to D-types and they're not always going to be available 24 hours a day. Relax and keep yourself busy doing your own stuff.

And I highly doubt he would have announced your collaring to the world if he wasn't interested.

Be sure to COMMUNICATE with your Master that you'd like him to keep you updated. Even with a short line like, "got your email but I'm swamped".



erebus -> RE: master ignores after claiming (10/4/2008 9:25:05 PM)

I agree.  A couple of days isn't long.  However, the anticipation you are probably feeling can make you quite anxious.  If he doesn't contact you in a day or so, why not contact him and ask what is going on?



greyjay -> RE: master ignores after claiming (10/4/2008 9:25:57 PM)

If he's interested, he'll be in touch.  Is he local or long distance?  give us a bit of background, how long have you both been talking?...that sort of thing.



CalifChick -> RE: master ignores after claiming (10/4/2008 10:31:54 PM)

Uhhh... yeah... "all weekend"???  So basically, less than 24 hours.  I would suggest a discussion of how often you will be communicating, because if you're in a panic after less than 24 hours, things are not looking too good for you for the future.  Not because of him, but because of your reactions.


Cali



faithbunny -> RE: master ignores after claiming (10/4/2008 10:48:24 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: forhim

my master just announced his taking of me on his profile but has not answered my emails, seen me or spoken to me all weekend

hes not interested right?

why bother to change the profile then?


Sweetie, take it down a notch. Clingy is not a good look. You had a life before you met him; go have a life. He'll be in touch, and it'll probably go a lot better if you say, oh, I missed you, what have you been up to, instead of, OMGwherehaveyoubeendon'tyouwantmeanymore????  

I've been there--I've got some killer abandonment issues--but once I found out the hard way that I really am capable of living without my beloved if I have to, I got a lot less needy, and now that we're back together I think it's easier on both of us that I don't need so much attention and reassurance to get through the day. He loved me before, but I think he likes me better now. ; )

~faith



JumpingJax -> RE: master ignores after claiming (10/4/2008 10:53:45 PM)



You know it is possible that his internet went down. His computer fried. Bad storm knocked out the power.

Had an unexpected family member that needed help with something that dragged him away.

Had his boss call him in to work unexpected.

got drunk at a friends house last night and can't find his keys????



Well tons of possible reasons. Give it a week or so and see what happens....



sistermargaret -> RE: master ignores after claiming (10/4/2008 10:57:36 PM)

Humm, newly collared, huh? Don't some of the rules change with a collar? i mean, Y/you are at a different level now, so maybe the play will be different now too. Maybe He expects You to feel a bit more secure now, better able to endure faithfully in His absense. Maybe He's testing you. Maybe He got into a terrible accident and is lying in a ditch someplace moaning your name .... oops, soap opera, never mind ;)
i do understand how you feel. i've felt that same way too, and it is a feeling of utter panic. Relax, breath, and have faith that all is well. Give it three days before you send the cops out looking for him.
sm
 
All it takes is absolute surrender



Maya2001 -> RE: master ignores after claiming (10/4/2008 10:58:08 PM)

I noticed you have yourself labeled as a dominant female  ...do you tell your subs where you are every minute of the day????



masterforRT -> Cmon! (10/5/2008 1:04:43 AM)

Let me clue you into something: many of us have other things in their lives other then BDSM. Things like jobs, children, spouses, family and friends, etc., etc.  Many times these real life activities take away from online activities..

Cut this Master some space!



KatyLied -> RE: Cmon! (10/5/2008 4:31:04 AM)

quote:

Cut this Master some space!


Or find one as needy as you are.

quote:

hes not interested right?


Perhaps not.  Maybe he got what he needed and he has moved on.  Maybe he's busy with life.  Maybe you should ask him.



littlemisssnarf -> RE: Cmon! (10/5/2008 6:37:28 AM)

i can understand where the OP is coming from - gosh i'm just as needy at times and especially as you are newly collared.... you need to speak to your Master about contact and consistency... tell him how this has made you feel.... Of course this could be part of his plan - to allow this sense of loss for a day or so might mean that you will be more grateful and happy to see him....

You haven't mentioned whether this is online or real life - either way like others have said just chill out a little.... Chocolate cake might help!



KatyLied -> RE: Cmon! (10/5/2008 6:40:37 AM)

But if you are newly collared, shouldn't that give you confidence in the relationship?  Instead of making you more insecure? 

The way around this, or what I would do, is give him the same amount of attention that he gives you.  Find something to do and get busy, don't be constantly available to him.



kiwisub12 -> RE: Cmon! (10/5/2008 6:52:10 AM)

Ummm   ----   are we in high school here?  As big girls, we should be confident enough in ourselves and our charms to realise our worth to another.
The fact that he found enough time to change his profile should suggest that he is acknowledging the change in status, and that he is busy.  Is this an online only relationship? and if so, you need to realise that he has a life to live off the keyboard.

Give it a week before you take the collar off and realise that you need to throw your heart out there a little less speedily. [:o]



DarkSteven -> RE: Cmon! (10/5/2008 6:52:17 AM)

Did you discuss what the relationship would be like, including frequency of contact, before you took his collar?



forhim -> RE: Cmon! (10/5/2008 8:02:31 AM)

Thank you all so much for the advice. This is rl not online and yes I am still confused/insecure.

Guess I'll just keep on living.



KatyLied -> RE: Cmon! (10/5/2008 8:07:09 AM)

Are you forbidden from contacting him?



forhim -> RE: Cmon! (10/5/2008 8:09:42 AM)

He hasnt said I was forbidden - no. But he has read and not responded to my emails



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