krikket -> RE: dishonoring a request (10/12/2008 3:27:20 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: AnnesMentor I am mentoring a young, novice submissive, from a distance, to better equip her and prepare her to enter her local bdsm scene. She is learning about honor and integrity and is becoming more confident about herself with each passing day. In my opinion honor and integrity aren't something that can be "taught" -- you either have them or not. Self confidence is another matter altogether, not to be taught, but to see ourselves through someone's eyes, in a light that's more positive than negitive, can be a good thing. quote:
At my request, she put a very clear message in her profile that she is in training and is temporarily not permitted to communicate with anyone. She stated that it's only for a short period. After that, I will encourage her to talk to others and will help her transition into her local community, and will teach her how to safely search for an honorable Dom. This is probably the part of your post that disturbs me the most. Why do you find it necessary to isolate her from others, even for a short period? Knowledge can come from many sources and contact with others is certainly one way. Isolation deprives her of finding out that there are many ways of doing things, that your way of doing things is only one of many. My first master, who was mainly on-line due to distance, wanted me to talk to and learn from others, and to discuss those ideas with him. Those discussions were often fun, educational and stimulating, whether he agrees with those people or not. It was a great way to learn more about him and about how our life experiences had shaped how we each viewed the D/s dynamic in our lives. Looking back now, i can see that he was preparing me for our eventual split. He expanded my mind, touched my soul and i'm a better person and sub because of him. quote:
In spite of the request in her profile that she not be contacted, she continually gets messages from other 'Doms' and informs me each time. To me, with my background in the scene, these Doms are dishonoring both her and me. Comments? Having said all of that, i don't see how anyone is dishonoring you or her. It's the internet and like someone else said, her addition to her profile about not speaking with anyone else, is like waving a red flag in front of a bull (sorry Doms..lol). jimini
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