RE: Tributes (Full Version)

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nefariousdreams -> RE: Tributes (10/16/2008 1:46:57 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1
I have no interest in you bowing to me.  You are not my sub.


I think I might have to quote you on that. Probably the funniest thing I have seen on Collar Me in a long time.

Oh wait, you are serious...

quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1
There are two possibilities here.  Either you knew the answer to teensub's question before she posted it, or you didn't.  If you knew the answer, then the two of you are playing a manipulative game.  If you didn't know the answer, then by definition your opinion is worth less than the facts the posters on this thread have been providing you, even though you are claiming that everyone's opinion is just as valid as everybody else's.  It's not, because some people aren't posting their opinions.  They are posting the facts of their lives.


Interesting. Your self righteous opinion is patronising and belittling of my experience, however limited.

Do you have anything useful to contribute or just because you have a friend that is a Pro Domme the facts of your life outpoint my experience? What? Have you actually stopped to listen to yourself?





teensub -> RE: Tributes (10/16/2008 1:50:35 PM)

lol, maybe that is something i could get into when im broke, altho i think my master may think otherwise ;-) (winks to M)

A bodyguard as well, damn why didn't hear about this pro sub stuff earlier..

Now i think i would have my dom's buy me corsets and christian louboutin shoes!

*thinks she may have forgotten shes owned in all the excitement of thoughts of shoes and corsets!*




JustDarkness -> RE: Tributes (10/16/2008 1:51:07 PM)

Is there soemthing in the air..that in every thread people are pissed on eachother?
(aimed at the fighters...lol)




teensub -> RE: Tributes (10/16/2008 1:53:25 PM)

JustDarkness i have just been a little miffed at the way some people have responded to me on this site that is all.

Now back to this pro sub stuff ;-)




teensub -> RE: Tributes (10/16/2008 2:06:41 PM)

I have seen my first profile and website for a pro DOM. Thought i would share that with you all..




Madame4a -> RE: Tributes (10/16/2008 2:12:42 PM)

In my mind, anyone who wants them should be bought the shoes and corsets they desire... [:D]

but that's just me


quote:

ORIGINAL: teensub

lol, maybe that is something i could get into when im broke, altho i think my master may think otherwise ;-) (winks to M)

A bodyguard as well, damn why didn't hear about this pro sub stuff earlier..

Now i think i would have my dom's buy me corsets and christian louboutin shoes!

*thinks she may have forgotten shes owned in all the excitement of thoughts of shoes and corsets!*




colouredin -> RE: Tributes (10/16/2008 2:17:43 PM)

Aside from pro Dommes and Doms and subs there are also people who speciialise in fantasies, this is one way in which a pro sub could get into it, doing topless house cleaning and being paid to be humiliated etc. Some people have very specific fantasies and paying for it means that all areas are dealt with.




thishereboi -> RE: Tributes (10/16/2008 3:43:14 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: nefariousdreams

quote:

ORIGINAL: thishereboi
Just out of curiousity....how many Dommes have you met and spoken to in real life?


So back to the view of my opinion is more valid than your opinion blah blah blah...


What on earth is the relevance of how many Dommes teensub has spoken to in real life when the OP was about the high proportion of Dommes she has seen on here that demand a tribute? She never said all Dommes, or alll the Dommes she has spoken to, or all the Dommes on this board.

I find the attitude of many to be disappointing. Ask a simple question based on an acknowledged limited experience and suddenly your opinion is invalid and your attitude poor when you respond. It seems to me that it is many of the people telling teensub that her opinion is wrong are doing it in the very way that they are complaining about relating to her first post.

We have actually spoken via PM to colouredin and sorted things out. Perhaps a few others should take a leaf out of her book and open themselves up to the possibility, however slighty, that they might just have overreacted to an innocent question.

I would have expected more tolerance from more people in the BDSM community which has been my experience up until now. Or am I letting the intolerant few cloud my view of the pleasant majority?


So does this mean she is not going to answer the question? There is a world of difference between the internet and the real world. According to teensub "In my opinion the majority of domme's i have seen/spoken to just do this for the money, and require and tribute.
That opinion is mine to have."

Now, if she is going to make a blanket statement about a group of women, maybe she should go out and actually meet some of them.




GoddessNatasha -> RE: Tributes (10/16/2008 3:58:02 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Rover

Back to the OP:

quote:

ORIGINAL: teensub

Why do most domme's i see on this site expect tributes?


Short answer... because they can. 
 
Longer answer...
 
1.  Men have historically been far more willing to pay for "getting some" (the composition of "some" being very subjective) than women.  There are plenty of prostitutes catering to men... far fewer gigilos catering to women.  Similarly, there are plenty of "Pro Dommes" (a misnomer... they are overwhelmingly Dominatrixes engaged in scene play with paying clients rather than Dominants engaged in power exchange relationships) catering to male bottoms in exchange for "tribute" (the function of which is often a kink unto itself).  And before anyone gets their panties in a bunch... I am not equating Dominatrixes with prostitutes.  Don't be so sensitive.
 
2.  Most female Dominants do not expect "tribute".  The professional Dominatrixes do.  They're business women and expect payment for their services.  You shouldn't confuse the two.
 
3.  "Tribute" sounds so much more sophisticated than saying an S/M session costs (fill in the blank with whatever the going rate may be).
 
quote:


why do female dominants expect it but male doms dont?


Again, it is not my experience that female Dominants expect tribute.  However, professional Dominatrixes do.  And I'm sure that there are some professional male Dominatrixes (or whatever they're called) who expect tribute as well.  They're just far fewer in number, and far less obvious as a result.
 
John




GoddessNatasha -> RE: Tributes (10/16/2008 4:42:27 PM)

quote:

Why do most domme's i see on this site expect tributes?


 
quote:

Similarly, there are plenty of "Pro Dommes" (a misnomer... they are overwhelmingly Dominatrixes engaged in scene play with paying clients rather than Dominants engaged in power exchange relationships) 

 
I can't agree it is a misnomer, John. I prefer ProDomme, thank you. I usually engage in power exchange relationships with My clients tho the duration may be much shorter, and I very much enjoy the dynamic. I feel I am an artist creating a drama in which I am lucky enough to participate and usually enjoy.

2.
quote:

  Most female Dominants do not expect "tribute".  The professional Dominatrixes do.  They're business women and expect payment for their services.  You shouldn't confuse the two.

 
Let Me suggest another factor if it hasn't already been addressed. The ProDomme is readily available to most submissives and fetishes in Her geographic area, at least those who are clean, odor free and compatable with Her repetoir. Whereas, the submissive must gain the Dominant's attention, woo Her with gifts and precious time, and then perhaps too often face rejection. The numbers are against him even before he has made his investment in gifts and time. So, we ProDommes provide for an economy of time and effort and quite often a satisfactory power exchange relationship with frequent fliers.[;)] I think that's worth the tribute. I am talking BDSM here, not an escort service. And true we are business women, as you say. But that doesn't diminish our worth. Thanks for reading.
 
Goddess Natasha
 

 





moonvine -> RE: Tributes (10/16/2008 6:06:27 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: colouredin

Aside from pro Dommes and Doms and subs there are also people who speciialise in fantasies, this is one way in which a pro sub could get into it, doing topless house cleaning and being paid to be humiliated etc. Some people have very specific fantasies and paying for it means that all areas are dealt with.


Anyone is more than welcome to come clean my house, topless, bottomless, any other way they want to clean it!

I have 12 litterboxes too!




Rover -> RE: Tributes (10/16/2008 7:49:24 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessNatasha

 
quote:


Similarly, there are plenty of "Pro Dommes" (a misnomer... they are overwhelmingly Dominatrixes engaged in scene play with paying clients rather than Dominants engaged in power exchange relationships)
 

 
I can't agree it is a misnomer, John. I prefer ProDomme, thank you. I usually engage in power exchange relationships with My clients tho the duration may be much shorter, and I very much enjoy the dynamic. I feel I am an artist creating a drama in which I am lucky enough to participate and usually enjoy.

 
You are, of course, welcome to label yourself in any manner you wish.  Most of us would call that a Top engaged in a scene.  And although power can be exchanged for the duration of a scene (which is evidently quite a production in your case), it is not the functional equivalent of a power exchange relationship. 

quote:


Let Me suggest another factor if it hasn't already been addressed. The ProDomme is readily available to most submissives and fetishes in Her geographic area, at least those who are clean, odor free and compatable with Her repetoir.

 
As would be the case with any good business woman (or man).
 
quote:


Whereas, the submissive must gain the Dominant's attention, woo Her with gifts and precious time, and then perhaps too often face rejection.

 
Thank you for making the distinction between a professional Dominatrix and Domme, which you were relectant accept previously.  In other words, a relationship is no sure thing.  A business transaction is.
 
quote:


The numbers are against him even before he has made his investment in gifts and time. So, we ProDommes provide for an economy of time and effort and quite often a satisfactory power exchange relationship with frequent fliers.[;)]

 
Ask yourself this question... is the relationship predicated upon the power exchange, or the money exchange?  Would the relationship cease if money no longer changed hands?  Quite simply, that answer will reveal whether you have a power exchange relationship or a buiness relationship.
 
quote:


I think that's worth the tribute. I am talking BDSM here, not an escort service. And true we are business women, as you say. But that doesn't diminish our worth. Thanks for reading.


At no time did I denigrate the value of the tribute paid, or the worth of professional Dominatrixes.  And never have I compared BDSM with an escort service.  Anyone who knows me realizes that I have a fair understanding of BDSM and the various ways in which people's interests are expressed.  There is no need to defend yourself from an accusation not made.
 
John
 

 






shewhoserves -> RE: Tributes (10/17/2008 1:05:55 AM)

wow so many interesting posts, i respect the ProDommes nothing wrong with with offering a service and getting paid for it, but since i have been on CM i got two messages from (wont mention names) so called Princess's and got a wishlist in the first and last message... spoil me bla bla bla, and we will talk.  what do You call those? 




amaidiamond -> RE: Tributes (10/17/2008 1:22:08 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: shewhoserves

wow so many interesting posts, i respect the ProDommes nothing wrong with with offering a service and getting paid for it, but since i have been on CM i got two messages from (wont mention names) so called Princess's and got a wishlist in the first and last message... spoil me bla bla bla, and we will talk.  what do You call those? 


People into Money slaves - and yep they are out there and yep - the slaves are out their too.

Some guys kink is to be used as a cash cow.

I treat them like i treat the mails from people wanting me to do anything else outside of my zone - a polite thanks but no thanks then move on.




shewhoserves -> RE: Tributes (10/17/2008 1:27:53 AM)

cash cow?  people actually into this for real? 




GoddessNatasha -> RE: Tributes (10/18/2008 7:38:58 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Rover

quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessNatasha




quote:

Thank you for making the distinction between a professional Dominatrix and Domme, which you were relectant accept previously.  In other words, a relationship is no sure thing.  A business transaction is.

 
No business transaction is a sure thing. Every business transaction is a form of relationship, and every relationship includes an exchange of value of some kind, although many bury that thought in romance and sentimentality. Ask yourself, would you remain in a relationship if there were no payoff for you? Not if you are stable and intelligent, I don't think.

 

quote:

Ask yourself this question... is the relationship predicated upon the power exchange, or the money exchange?  Would the relationship cease if money no longer changed hands?  Quite simply, that answer will reveal whether you have a power exchange relationship or a buiness relationship.

 
Chicken and egg question. Knowingly repeating myself here, would the power exchange cease if value ceased? I think so.

 
quote:

At no time did I denigrate the value of the tribute paid, or the worth of professional Dominatrixes.  And never have I compared BDSM with an escort service.  Anyone who knows me realizes that I have a fair understanding of BDSM and the various ways in which people's interests are expressed.  There is no need to defend yourself from an accusation not made.

 
okay, apologies for that. Thank you.
 
Natasha

 


 







AcademyForSlaves -> RE: Tributes (10/18/2008 8:57:37 PM)

Hi.

You've asked a great question. The answer varies. A Mistress might ask for a tribute because she owns a website and she needs to cover those costs, or because the subs act like a client asking her to do a session and cater to his fetishes so she decides to charge him a fee, or she believes it's part of a slave role to work to contribute to his Mistress's lifestyle.

Now the male doms might not charge a fee for various reasons. Maybe he does make his slaves work and give him their wages, maybe it's not a fee but he still expects them to pay him in some way. Maybe he works and gets paid lots and doesn't need a slave to give him money so he makes his slaves stay home and look after his home. It'll be interesting seeing what the male doms say about if he makes his slaves give him money, or work for him, and if not then why.




nefariousdreams -> RE: Tributes (10/19/2008 11:09:51 AM)

I love this site. Just because we deign to disagree with this 'thishereboi' she (?) takes time to send an incredibly patronizing message to me and then blocks me so I am unable to respond. Grow up love, surely the key to BDSM is tolerance and leaving each to their own without being judgmental. Oh well...




ModeratorEleven -> RE: Tributes (10/19/2008 11:44:28 AM)

Ok kids, that's enough.

XI





thishereboi -> RE: Tributes (10/20/2008 3:37:39 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: nefariousdreams

I love this site. Just because we deign to disagree with this 'thishereboi' she (?) takes time to send an incredibly patronizing message to me and then blocks me so I am unable to respond. Grow up love, surely the key to BDSM is tolerance and leaving each to their own without being judgmental. Oh well...


Yes, so you sent back your response using one of your other screen names. Not sure why you didn't post it here though. I noticed teen sub also did not answer my original question, so maybe you can.

How many pro dommes do you know in real life?

Not sure how the question is judgemental though. Teensub is telling us how she thinks pro dommes act and I am just trying to determine where she got her info from. How hard is that?




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