RE: Are there any words of phrases which are banned in your relationship? If so why? (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Master



Message


kyraofMists -> RE: Are there any words of phrases which are banned in your relationship? If so why? (11/10/2008 6:56:44 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP
I really don't understand banning words.


It is an exercise in authority and submitting to someone else's will.  He has authority over everything in my life, even the words I speak.  Nothing more, nothing less.

Knight's Kyra




NuevaVida -> RE: Are there any words of phrases which are banned in your relationship? If so why? (11/10/2008 7:06:26 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

I really don't understand banning words.

"Is your cough any better?" gets a yes or no answer, not a please no.

"I feel like eating out. Any place you want to go?"  that could easily get a yes, a no, or an I don't know.


In my case, "I don't know" was banned because when we first started I really didn't know myself well. "What are you thinking/feeling?" was often met with "I don't know" which was a cop out on my part. By not allowing that answer, I was forced to think about what I was thinking/feeling and expressing it.

"Where do you want to go eat?" was not a question that was asked. He picked the place when we went out. Once there, he'd sometimes ask me "What looks good to you?" (on the menu) and I'd tell him, then he'd order for me. Other times he would just order for me and I would eat what was placed in front of me. If he did ask where I wanted to eat and I really didn't know, my answer would be "I don't really have a preference." But the idea behind this ban of words was to push me to always know what I was thinking or feeling. That's what it was applied to. If he asked some crazy mathematical question and I really didn't know, then I could say I didn't know.

In other cases if he disallowed a word or phrase, it was simply because that word or phrase rubbed him the wrong way and he didn't want to hear it coming from my mouth. Because I wanted to please him at all times, I wouldn't say it, and would find another way of expressing what I had to say.

Come to think of it, one thing I wasn't allowed to do was to refer to my whippings as "beatings." He felt "beating" had a very negative connotation, and represented "hitting with a careless disregard for ones well being." It was his opinion of this, and he didn't like me saying that he beat me. I could say he flogged me, or belted me, or whipped me, etc. But I could not represent what he did to me as beatings.




SimplyMichael -> RE: Are there any words of phrases which are banned in your relationship? If so why? (11/10/2008 7:47:16 AM)

I would love to ban

"to be honest"...but to be honest, I have failed to get her to stop saying that.

"I am sorry" about any issues relating to family

And I seem to be banned from saying

"GO FUCK YOURSELF" unless I am refering to using a new toy or something.




BossyShoeBitch -> RE: Are there any words of phrases which are banned in your relationship? If so why? (11/10/2008 7:59:45 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael

I would love to ban

"to be honest"...but to be honest, I have failed to get her to stop saying that.

"I am sorry" about any issues relating to family

And I seem to be banned from saying

"GO FUCK YOURSELF" unless I am refering to using a new toy or something.

Yep!

And I am sure there was one more phrase you didn't like, but for the life of me, I cannot remember what it was!




sailorfrank -> RE: Are there any words of phrases which are banned in your relationship? If so why? (11/10/2008 8:25:37 AM)

    Ummm yes Mainly the damn word..."can`t"   you can do anything okay.   or any other negative words that a person uses on themselves.

Dont bring them up as I am trying to build you up not take you down.[;)]




LadyPact -> RE: Are there any words of phrases which are banned in your relationship? If so why? (11/10/2008 8:59:06 AM)

The use of My first name, while not banned, isn't to be used  except in extreme circumstances where clip is concerned.  So far, there has only been one time that I've heard him say it.  That was in a situation where the person I was being introduced to was not mature enough to understand a term such as "Dominant." 

I didn't specifically ban it, but use of the term "holla" will not be tolerated.  It is not a word.  It is a lazy form of a term that was a derivative of a misused dialect.  I don't care if Gwen Steffanie made it popular by song or not.  It is still laziness on top of ignorance.

I am very specific in the way a person might use the term "ok."  If something is clearly in error and it has been pointed out, "ok" is not acceptable.  In other words, if something was ok, I wouldn't have to point out what was wrong with the issue in the first place.




slaveluci -> RE: Are there any words of phrases which are banned in your relationship? If so why? (11/10/2008 1:45:42 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: barelynangel
[sm=gaah.gif]   Okay, "fix`in and fit'in" need to be banned from the WORLD lol.  OMG I never honestly expected words to be able to be nails on the chalkboard to me until i came to Tennessee and heard them lol.  If people want to sound completely hillbilly and uneducated, those are two words to learn.   

Just for clarification, I happen to be quite educated as are many friends and acquaintances of mine who still say "fixin' to."  The words and phrases someone uses (as well as their accent) doesn't necessarily indicate their level of education or intelligence.  As a matter of fact, to me, a bigger indicator of those things is often the way in which one looks down his or her nose at the uneducated, often calling them bigoted names like "hillbillies."  Usually I find behaviors and words like THAT to be more indicative of ones intelligence level[8|]...............luci, who's fixin' to be totally fed up with unfair judgments on her hillbilly ass[;)]




girlygurl -> RE: Are there any words of phrases which are banned in your relationship? If so why? (11/10/2008 2:01:02 PM)

No not really. I'm expected to always be respectful, but other than that, He's never told me that I couldn't say a particular word or phrase.

girly




came4U -> RE: Are there any words of phrases which are banned in your relationship? If so why? (11/10/2008 2:41:36 PM)

quote:

For both Dominants and sub/slaves. Are there any words of phrases which are banned in your relationship? If so why?


"No, you cannot have that purse/pair of shoes/earings"

those are hard limits.




AStudyInScarlet -> RE: Are there any words of phrases which are banned in your relationship? If so why? (11/10/2008 3:05:59 PM)

"bitch" and "whatever" and banned completely and we don't ever break that rule




XaviersXian -> RE: Are there any words of phrases which are banned in your relationship? If so why? (11/10/2008 3:35:36 PM)

greetings to all,

Any and all swear words

and (if said seriously) "no!"

well wishes,




PurpleSockx -> RE: Are there any words of phrases which are banned in your relationship? If so why? (11/10/2008 7:01:10 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lashra

He is not permitted to put himself down. So the words: loser, dumb ass, dumb fuck, stupid etc are not to be used.

~Lashra

It's the same for me :) I'm not allowed to put myself down, as well. Expressing my feelings is fine, of course, but I know very well that if I use deragotary words about myself, and particularly the word "useless" (He hates it!) then I've just set myself  for a "little" lecture coming my way.




Knightenslaves -> RE: Are there any words of phrases which are banned in your relationship? If so why? (11/10/2008 7:50:26 PM)

The words yeah and ok in response to a yes/no question is banned.




SimplyMichael -> RE: Are there any words of phrases which are banned in your relationship? If so why? (11/10/2008 8:37:46 PM)

Why on earth would someone ban "no"?  I mean how else would you know you are violating them?




PurpleSockx -> RE: Are there any words of phrases which are banned in your relationship? If so why? (11/10/2008 8:55:04 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael

Why on earth would someone ban "no"?  I mean how else would you know you are violating them?


I don't no... [:D]
 
Seriously, I don't understand this one either... but I guess there are other ways to say "no" too... But, personally, I would wonder how great my communication is with my Master if I wasn't allowed to respond in a negative manner ever...




monywildcat -> RE: Are there any words of phrases which are banned in your relationship? If so why? (11/10/2008 9:01:59 PM)

I can't call Daddy "sir".  Even though it is as natural as breathing for me, I call everyone Sir, Ma'am as this is how I was raised.  But I do anyway, when I want to be ornery. 

And he can't call me a "cunt" for any reason at all.  Talk about nails on a chalkboard.  If he did, I may punch him in the arm.  Heaven help me when he catches me!!![:D]




manxcat -> RE: Are there any words of phrases which are banned in your relationship? If so why? (11/10/2008 11:11:04 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: IronBear

quote:

ORIGINAL: manxcat

Geez everyone must be pms'ing today.  I have seen this sort of response before, and rarely does anyone get into a snit about it.  just sayn'. 

This was not to you.  It was to the other posters who decided to diss me for defending my countrymen from an obvious misapprehension - to repeat, Never on my almost 53 years of living in the United States have i ever heard anyone say congrashulations.  I have traveled (spending at least 20 days) in 49 of the 50 states, and have lived in 17, as an adult.  As the post was about WORDS, PRONUNCIATION and LANGUAGE USAGE, and you made the errors, i addressed them.  As far as i know, this is an OPEN FORUM.   I have as much right as you do to express my opinion and respond, as does anyone else .  If someone doesn't like it, or me, they can just not read me.  If they think i wrote something untoward, they can report me to the moderators.  


Very interesting. You obviously are ingorant regarding people's spelling here or you may have noticed than many here who both missuse grammar and misspell words do so because English is not their first language. 
I have never publicly corrected anyone whose first language is not English.  As a matter of fact, i do not even say people in/from other countries, i say people in/from different countries as i did in my post, because i do not make the assumption that English speakers are primary, and everyone else is other/secondary.  FYI - German is my first language.

For my part, I use UK english both in spelling and Grammar for that was what I was educated classically in (The Queens English). I am however aware that much of the English used in both the US and Australia have developed a flavour and spelling of their own. I woill point out but not hide (Then why even mention it?) behind it, I am dyslexis  As you are aware of this, then perhaps what you are what you accuse others of, being lazy.  which means I usually write in word with spell check on then cut and paste my posts here. Something I haven't the time to do at the moment.  
You were also dissing people for being lazy.
  • "What ever!"  People using it usually are displaying a lack of both vocabulary or the ability to form a proper responce.  Alternatively, they are just lazy and if so they demonstrate a complete of respect for people they make that somment to.  I would think that in your original post  - which is what i was responding to - you would take the time, as you took the time to formulate the thoughts.  Don't bother to appologise for it will not be accepted, your crassness goes before you.  I have nothing to apologize for.  I was in no way crass, nor snippy as someone else suggested, nor rude, as was later emended. 

    I accept that for some countries or areas, going to go may be correct grammar. However when I was educated it was not and it seems to be incorrecr as far as Englist Grammar (as in England) goes to, or so I am informed when I raised this question a few weeks ago with several accademic associates of mine. It's not a big deal really I keep it on my banned list because I was educated differently.


  • I never made a comment about going to go.
     
     
    If you want to take exception to something i said, why not take it to what i said to YOU, not what i said to someone else.  As i said to those others, i have seen many posts similar to mine, without all the venomous responses.  I wonder if it had come from someone you/they knew, would it have received the same vitriolic response.  I will repeat, this is an open forum.  You will very likely receive reponses you do not like, disagree with, or take exception to.  Life is like that. 
     
    manxcat
    Walk in Beauty
     
    _______________
    I would rather be villified for doing the right thing than be praised for doing the wrong thing.




    SailingBum -> RE: Are there any words of phrases which are banned in your relationship? If so why? (11/10/2008 11:25:47 PM)

    quote:

    ORIGINAL: IronBear

    This question was prompted by another thread on this board, "punishment".

    For both Dominants and sub/slaves. Are there any words of phrases which are banned in your relationship? If so why?

    For my part, few things are universally banned in Bruin Cottage or in my presence. They are:
    • "What ever!" 

    I'm not sure why this word and other words like it and "no" in certain instances would be included in this list,  would need to be baned.  To me is show a complete lack of respect.  Those types of words have don't belong in any relationship.

    I was raised in a home that when Dad said jump  your reply was how high. 

    BadOne




    Knightenslaves -> RE: Are there any words of phrases which are banned in your relationship? If so why? (11/11/2008 1:20:03 AM)

    quote:

    ORIGINAL: SailingBum


    I'm not sure why this word and other words like it and "no" in certain instances would be included in this list,  would need to be baned.  To me is show a complete lack of respect.  Those types of words have don't belong in any relationship.

    I was raised in a home that when Dad said jump  your reply was how high. 

    BadOne


    I do not think I specifially said to any of my slaves "Those words are banned" but rather something to the effect of what the correct response is. I agree they have no place in a relationship, especially a M/s or D/s but in society they are common phrases and accepted.




    AquaticSub -> RE: Are there any words of phrases which are banned in your relationship? If so why? (11/11/2008 2:17:32 AM)

    quote:

    ORIGINAL: OrionTheWolf

    Other than the fact that my property must phrase things in a request or not in an imperative manner, she is forbidden to call herself stupid, dumb, or retarded. She may say she did a dumb thing, but not call herself such.


    That's pretty much the only thing that is banned in our relationship. I'm also not allowed to call myself useless but that follows the same line.

    And while not expressly banned, I'm pretty sure he'd look down at me bitching at someone for a prefectly legiable post that doesn't leave room for confusion. Typos and mispellings happen - the world moves on. However, for those who need to spew their venom (hey snark happens - gotta get it out somewhere), there is a livejournal community *devoted* to those particular needs. I believe it's called grammar snark, where one can frolic and rip others to shreds at their hearts content. And G-d help the one who says "grammer". [;)]




    Page: <<   < prev  1 2 3 [4] 5   next >   >>

    Valid CSS!




    Collarchat.com © 2025
    Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy
    0.03125