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'Online training' - 11/9/2008 9:41:15 AM   
charly303


Posts: 10
Joined: 1/8/2008
Status: offline 		I've been into BDSM for years and years but something I've noticed quite alot while I've been searching around for a new partner is 'online training.' I don't really understand how this is supposed to work, I've always thought that this lifestyle is a very emotional and physical experience where directly seeing and feeling the reaction of your partner is very important. Is this purely for the kick of someone making commands and then someone following them and trying to proove it via email/webcam etc and that being the fetish?

The reason why I ask is that I've noticed that many Dom/mes will not consider meeting someone or talking in real life until they have been through online training. The whole thing just seems a bit too detached and distant.
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: 'Online training' - 11/9/2008 9:44:36 AM   
camille65


Posts: 5746
Joined: 7/11/2007
From: Austin Texas
Status: offline 		Not all online training is about getting naked on a webcam. Our relationship was strictly online for the first 3 years and never once did I cam naked for him although using the cam was an important tool.
There are as many reasons for an online relationship as there are people.

Some folks are disabled and use the internet.
Some fall for someone far away and use the internet.
Some don't want the hassle and reality of human interaction and use the internet.
Etc.



_____________________________


~Love your life! (It is the only one you'll get).




(in reply to charly303)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: 'Online training' - 11/9/2008 9:45:36 AM   
mistoferin


Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline 		If you've been into BDSM for years and years, surely you know enough people in real time that you don't have to waste your time with the online stuff. I can't imagine that online would be very satisfying to anyone who has been doing it in full living color for years.

_____________________________

Peace and light,
~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

(in reply to charly303)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: 'Online training' - 11/9/2008 9:48:01 AM   
charly303


Posts: 10
Joined: 1/8/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin

If you've been into BDSM for years and years, surely you know enough people in real time that you don't have to waste your time with the online stuff. I can't imagine that online would be very satisfying to anyone who has been doing it in full living color for years.


Well thats what I was asking about! But, yes, I suppose if you've never indulged then it would be a way of experimenting at first

(in reply to mistoferin)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: 'Online training' - 11/9/2008 9:49:59 AM   
JustDarkness


Posts: 1461
Joined: 7/25/2008
Status: offline 		If you want real time also, you just have to tell the D your view of things.
That way you both don't get disappointed.

(in reply to charly303)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: 'Online training' - 11/9/2008 9:50:03 AM   
LydiaSciKitten


Posts: 43
Joined: 10/16/2008
From: Luxembourg, now in UK
Status: offline 		In my opinion, online training means one of the following thing:
I am not really a Dom/me I am just trying this out, and if I think I can handle it, then I might meet up.
I am a person with no self-esteem, I get the cold feet when it comes to making my fantasies come true real-life.
I am trying to hide my age/disability/fat tummy/born gender.
I am looking for masturbation material.
I have had very bad experiences with meeting people and want to make 100% sure this is for real, and might turn out alright.

(in reply to camille65)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: 'Online training' - 11/9/2008 12:31:33 PM   
masterlink65


Posts: 683
Joined: 11/3/2007
Status: offline 		there are plenty of ways you can train a slave to your needs online. there are also of things that you cannot do online. i have used cam to cam during chat to establish some ground rules before a slave visits. i find it a nice detached way to get some formalities out of the way so realtime can go smoother once trainee arrives, and will have already in its head what to expect here.

(in reply to LydiaSciKitten)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: 'Online training' - 11/9/2008 12:35:38 PM   
WhiplashSmile2


Posts: 526
Joined: 6/11/2008
Status: offline 		You can get Online training in anything and everything these days.  Does not make it a quality experience.  Even more for D/s or BDSM.   I'm not certain as to how to go about it online either.   I'm more of a up close and personal kind of guy, that wants to be involved with somebody in a serious relationship.

(in reply to charly303)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: 'Online training' - 11/9/2008 12:39:59 PM   
Usako


Posts: 697
Joined: 7/29/2006
From: NYC
Status: offline 		Online training just seems like an excuse to find wank off material to me. Unless you're some married person trying to hide something or just trying to hide something in general, I don't see how online BDSM can benefit. Having a friendship or even having feelings grow for someone online is one thing. But taking orders? "Oh baby spank yourself for me" Pfft...as if.

(in reply to WhiplashSmile2)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: 'Online training' - 11/9/2008 12:46:04 PM   
antipode


Posts: 1787
Joined: 4/19/2004
Status: offline
quote:

seems a bit too detached and distant


Not only that, 93% of human communication is known to be non-verbal, so I think it varies between useless and a crock. I know from the Human Factors work I have done in the corporate world with remote communication that it leads to huge misunderstandings and miscommunication, because so much essential communicative information is missing.

(in reply to charly303)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: 'Online training' - 11/9/2008 12:51:16 PM   
masterlink65


Posts: 683
Joined: 11/3/2007
Status: offline 		i can see it being wank material if you consider BDSM to be about sex.

i on the other hand do not think of it as sex. i too am about realtime experience, owning a slave fulltime, etc. etc... most subs have no idea what it takes to be a slave. so with that said, me knowing specifically what i want from a slave, wouldnt it be easier to get a few things out of the way online, with distance being an issue, compatibility issues etc. online training is a good way for both parties to see how each other work together. would you really want a slave to relocate without knowing anything about said slave? would you want a slave to relocate not knowing a damn thing about the master it is relocating for? not me

you must be thinking of cam2cam sex rather than the issue of training a slave to be suitable to your needs as a master.



but if you have time and money to ship potential slaves in and out of your lofe, then by all means ,,,, whatever works for you.

(in reply to Usako)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: 'Online training' - 11/9/2008 12:55:46 PM   
masterlink65


Posts: 683
Joined: 11/3/2007
Status: offline 		cam2cam slave training is much different than cam2cam sex.

how is cam2cam hiding your age/weight/marital status?

your closed mind narrows your vision

(in reply to antipode)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: 'Online training' - 11/9/2008 7:10:42 PM   
UmbraDomina


Posts: 491
Joined: 7/22/2008
From: SE Michigan
Status: offline 		I can play air guiter, doesn't make me Jimmy Hendricks...... doesn't mean I can actually strum a single cord.
I can write all about a delicate, graceful dance...... doesn't mean I don't have two left feet.
I can talk about medical matters, ......doesn't make me a doctor.

I can type about BDSM, doesn't mean I am in a relationship with whom ever reads it.
I can call myself a mistress, or a master, a screen name, but that doesn't me a dominant.


_____________________________

Alexandra ~

~~ And I will show you something different from either your shadow at morning striding behind you Or your shadow at evening rising to meet you; I will show you fear in a handful of dust..... T.S. Elliot ~~

(in reply to masterlink65)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: 'Online training' - 11/9/2008 7:12:37 PM   
IdiotMale


Posts: 132
Joined: 10/5/2005
Status: offline 		Hendricks?? wow

(in reply to UmbraDomina)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: 'Online training' - 11/9/2008 7:45:39 PM   
Usako


Posts: 697
Joined: 7/29/2006
From: NYC
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: masterlink65

i can see it being wank material if you consider BDSM to be about sex.


BDSM might not be about sex but what it is about, human interactions, can't be done on line. Watching some dude on cam in no way helps me at all. It's not a submissive male actually serving me. I don't see how I can train anyone on line to what I actually want in real life. And, after numerous meetings with people from the net I know all to well that just because chatting is great on line, meeting is a whole other story. It's amazing how chemistry can change when you take away a screen and no amount of "training" on line or "cam2cam" nonsense will help.

Telling someone to write about their daily activities, or research something, or wear panties to work or do whatever other long distance nonsense people do does not equate to my idea of training, either me giving it or recieving it. In the end it's just a laundry list of tasks given by someone over the net who may or may not actually pan out and meet. Thanks but no thanks. I will talk and bond over the net but until I meet in person it's really not all that valid.

And honestly, who the hell is going to ship some slave they've only talked to on line and maybe the phone and saw some hot camsex of and ask them to relocate? That's what visiting is for, in person.

(in reply to masterlink65)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: 'Online training' - 11/9/2008 8:22:36 PM   
greeneyedreamer


Posts: 442
Joined: 6/20/2007
Status: offline 		In my opinion, online anything is just a precursor to getting to know someone. You chat, ask questions, answer questions, talk about likes, dislikes, etc. BUT the main thing is it ends. And then online MEETING goes on to become Real Life, Real Time, Real Touching, Real everything...

Of course, this could take time but I would say I almost never go more than a month or so without meeting. It just doesn't make sense to me, personally.

Dreamer

_____________________________

Dreamer, owned and ecstatically happy

I am still learning... Michelangelo, age 87

Maybe some women weren't meant to be tamed. Maybe they are suppose to run wild until they find someone just as wild to run with. Sex and the City

(in reply to Usako)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: 'Online training' - 11/9/2008 8:52:56 PM   
masterlink65


Posts: 683
Joined: 11/3/2007
Status: offline 		its a little difficult to have slave come over for coffee and a chat, when said slave in in new mexico, and i am in michigan.

the cam2cam training had said slave prepared for its first visit. wearing panties is not something i have my slaves do. the daily activities can be discussed on phone or via email. but there are things such as the 5 basic positions i tell me slaves to be at various times. i got all that out of the way via cam, and when it was able to visit, the slave already knew part of its duties i require of a slave. distance being a problem, and not expecting a slave to relocate by meeting online( would you?), time during realtime was going to be short, and we both knew this.

if you can avoid all this by email and some phone conversation, go for it. i interviewed and trained bruno for over a year. most of it realtime, but enough was done online, to save alot of time here, and made the realtime that much more fulfilling.


not something i do, but something to think about. if a potential slave is on the other end of the cam inflicting its own whatever to its self, it may make a potential master feel more comfortable about knowing where to place the slave, way ahead of time.

(in reply to greeneyedreamer)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: 'Online training' - 11/9/2008 8:54:09 PM   
masterlink65


Posts: 683
Joined: 11/3/2007
Status: offline 		jimmy???? wow

(in reply to IdiotMale)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: 'Online training' - 11/9/2008 9:12:32 PM   
CruelDesires


Posts: 824
Joined: 11/20/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: IdiotMale

Hendricks?? wow


LOL! Jimi! 

Hendrix. *Plays a riff*

C-D

_____________________________

Reputation is what other people know about you. Honor is what you know about yourself.
Lois McMaster Bujold, "A Civil Campaign", 1999

(in reply to IdiotMale)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: 'Online training' - 11/9/2008 9:24:30 PM   
oceanwynds


Posts: 1044
Joined: 8/24/2006
Status: offline 		My question regarding on-line training is how do you know a submissive is doing what you tell them to do? Really how can you know?

(in reply to CruelDesires)
Profile   Post #: 20
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