Breakfast (Full Version)

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WhiplashSmile2 -> Breakfast (11/10/2008 7:30:00 AM)

Sure, I'll admit it, I love it when somebody cooks me up a nice tasty breakfast.  What self respecting Dominant does not after all.  However, I also enjoy cooking breakfast for somebody as well.

My little girl asked me this morning if I would cook her breakfast.  If I was there you betcha I would too.  I'd enjoy it too.  Perhaps, I'm too much of a Daddy Dom but I enjoy doing things for my partner.   Most of the time the concept of service submission is stressed so much, that well, not all D/s relationships are based on level of service a submissive provides their Dominant partner.

Some of us Doms enjoy being useful and of service at times too.  :-P  It's simply a matter of doing things for somebody we love and care about.  Not a matter of orientation or living up to stereotypes.




missturbation -> RE: Breakfast (11/10/2008 7:41:56 AM)

So cooking your partner breakfast would bring you both enjoyment and fulfillment. Hmm, activities and meeting of mind huh?
 
My ex Sir used to cook for me all the time. He got pleasure in throwing my bacon (for example) on the floor and watching me eat it from there.




OsideGirl -> RE: Breakfast (11/10/2008 7:43:02 AM)

Master frequently makes weekend breakfasts, sometimes makes dinner and has even drawn my bath water when he's determined that a bath is needed to make me feel better.

His view is that it is part of taking care of me. It also has to do with the direct impact of where my attention is and how our time together gets spent. He gets home before me. If he starts dinner that means that when I get home I have more time for him rather than spending that time on the house.




RainydayNE -> RE: Breakfast (11/10/2008 7:49:14 AM)

he makes really great grilled cheeses and omelettes :) and he likes ridiculously overcooked eggs like i do, which was seriously fantastic to find out haha :)
he's neat :) i've tried to help before and he'd just tell me to sit down =p
i think expecting people to exist in stereotypes and such, well there's just no room for that, especially not here. if a Dominant wants to cook, it's his/her perogative, which seems like the whole point of being a Dominant to me =p




SteelofUtah -> RE: Breakfast (11/10/2008 7:59:54 AM)

WhiplashSmile2,

With this and your other thread I get the impression that you are defending your right to do whatever the hell you want to do in your relationship. My Friend it is YOUR Power Exchange to define not anyone elses on this board.

You have made the comment about possibly being called a Service Top in your other thread and to that I say "So?"

I Prefer to Cook, I Cook MOST meals, I am a Good Cook and andi is not so much. But the girl makes it a point to make me breakfast ones every couple of weeks. She will wake up early and I will wake up to the smell of french toast of pancakes and Sausage and Eggs. To me this is above and beyond what is expected of her. I never ask for it she just does it.

I would say that andi asks for LOTS of things, she asks for us to play at times because I am at times forgetful of how long it has been since we played last because to me the relationship is the whole nit just parts of it.

I used to think that there was something wrog with me because we weren't playing all the time. Today I realize that we are always engaged in some aspect of this lifestyle because of how we define our Power Exchange it might not look like everyone elses Power Exchange but it works for us and makes us very happy.

So just RELAX I don't care if you cook every meal for your girl, get her drinks when she is thirsty, and carry her to bed when she is too tired to get herself there. As her Dominant if it is acceptable to YOU then it is an Acceptable Practice.

Take Care

Glad that you are Happy,

Steel




sub4hire -> RE: Breakfast (11/10/2008 8:22:05 AM)

Whiplash if you're ever in the breakfast cooking mood you're welcome at our house anytime.

Doug does not know how to cook nor does he have any desire to learn.  To date after ten years being together
he has made me a grilled cheese when I was too sick to stand.  A tofu hot dog.  A microwave bag of popcorn.

If he does offer it makes me feel as though he is supporting me.  It's a great feeling. 

Don't worry about what others think of you.  There are some dominants out there who cook out of necessity...because if they don't their submissives will poison the both of them.





LaTigresse -> RE: Breakfast (11/10/2008 8:25:32 AM)

Regardless of who else is around, I will always do the bulk of the cooking in my house. Clean-up is another matter entirely.




heartfeltsub -> RE: Breakfast (11/10/2008 8:27:55 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: SteelofUtah

WhiplashSmile2,

With this and your other thread I get the impression that you are defending your right to do whatever the hell you want to do in your relationship. My Friend it is YOUR Power Exchange to define not anyone elses on this board.

You have made the comment about possibly being called a Service Top in your other thread and to that I say "So?"
(snipped for brevity sake)

So just RELAX I don't care if you cook every meal for your girl, get her drinks when she is thirsty, and carry her to bed when she is too tired to get herself there. As her Dominant if it is acceptable to YOU then it is an Acceptable Practice.

Take Care

Glad that you are Happy,

Steel


Whiplash, i don't know you from Adam, but i really felt it was important to reiterate the comment Steel is making. There are a lot of your posts which seem to be looking for some sort of validation. Given some of your other posts about emotional issues that you are working through, it might be something that you should look at. Why it either (a) comes across as looking for validation or (b) if you are really looking for validation.

heartfelt




ThundersCry -> RE: Breakfast (11/10/2008 8:38:27 AM)

I am a good cook -L-
 
That does not make me any *less*....of anything. I love to cook for others...
 
But I am stubborn...I am going to do what I want...most of the time!
 
Now tossing the bacon on the floor...depends on what kinda bacon it is...-L-
 
Makin` bacon piggy...




WhiplashSmile2 -> RE: Breakfast (11/10/2008 8:45:40 AM)

SteelofUtah,  I just thought I'd take a few moments out this morning, and express a perspective that's in contrast to the "perniciously prevalent image" (to sort of quote leadership527 from my other thread).

Perhaps posts like these will be useful for newbies to read and think about, perhaps those people that feel a bit lost at times, because they don't fit into the stereotype fantasy images of the lifestyle.

Yes, you betcha I'm also defending my right.  It does not define what anybody elses power exchange is or is not on the board either.   This thread is simply another topic amoung many topics that people post about.

Hell, it even sort of made me go Aweeeee.. with missturbations posting to the thread.  I do have a certain deep appreciation for other peoples dynamics at times and what they actually enjoy and get out of it.  what some people find endearing others might find distastful or crazy.  What's important is what they are getting out of it.  So her post made me smile reading it. :-)

This post is my way of expressing, that not all us Doms are hard ass service freaks who take and take without giving in a relationship.   There are probally some submissives who are feeling tired of playing the D/s dating game, they have perhaps given up hope or feel totally turned off by Doms in the lifestyle.

I don't know, what value this thread holds for the readers.   Sure, this thread is about me and the kind of power exchange or dynamics I like.   I'm sharing this with others, and yes a little defensive, because I'm totally aware of the stereotypical pressures involved with the BDSM community at large, be it online or in the real time.

The message board is a bit like the Jerry Springer show.  Showing the different slices of life.  In this case the different slices of life and D/s.   I'm certain there are people that read missturbations post on here, and are saying to themselves "What the fuck?" however they fail to see the bonding time and enjoyment of that D/s dynamic.  For some people, this would seem cruel!   I don't think Dr. Phil would be able to keep a straight face and composure over it!  LOL...  Yes, Dr. Phil, he tossing my bacon on the floor and watches me eat it, I love it and I love him to death Dr. Phil.   Can you imagine that one being on the Air?  LOL... 

Case in point where stereotyping again screws with what two people love and enjoy doing in their relationship. 

The thing that bothers me at times, is how some people feel the need to act out in extreme ways to fit into the image of being in "the lifestyle" and stop looking at what works best for them in a relationship. 

It bothers me that some people attack certain behaviors as being too vanilla, and it bothers me to read so many posts at times, were people are dieing and begging for some vanilla aspect to be part of their relationship.  Why not blend both together and get a real balance in things?

Good lord, I love and enjoy bathing somebody as well.  I enjoy doing a little pampering of my partner.  Gives me the warm and fuzzy's at times. 

OK, so this post is not about beating, spanking or using somebody like fuckmeat.  It's not about blow jobs, body worship, flogging, spanking, humilation, nor how black and blue I can make somebody's ass turn.   It's not about training a slave, it's not about having somebody wait on me hand and foot, while I sit and watch TV or play Video Games for hours on end.  Actually, I don't watch too much TV and I'm not into playing Video Games much.

I'm just expressing, that I'm ok with doing things for my submissive partner in crime, I take no shame in it.  That it's ok if somebody else is a Dom and they enjoy doing the same things as well.  For everybody who's into doing things for their little girl or submissive relationship partner.  That doing so does not make you any less of a Dom.  This is the message I'm trying to express and share with other people.

Sure, many of us that are message board regulars are used to reading threads about these issues.  However, there's always somebody new that comes into the threads and starts to read things being posted here.

I open admit that I'll tend to buck the stereotyping as well.  I'll probally continue doing this until the day I die.  (sheepish grin).

I Love the message boards here at times.  Perhaps I've become a message board addict.  After a couple of years of being active on here, I have to wonder if I'm really an addict or not.  I can't seem to stay away for too long.  Then again, I'm sort of killing time and I'm doing something I enjoy.  I could be watching Rachel Rae instead of making posts this morning.  Not certain what time Dr. Phil starts.  Mmmm....




SimplyMichael -> RE: Breakfast (11/10/2008 8:50:07 AM)

I love good food, if she cooks better than me, guess who is going to be slaving away in the kitchen?  If I cook better, either I am cooking, teaching her, or she is paying for dinner.

I had a woman who I MADE order my food because she had better instincts than I did and I got tired of looking at her plate with envy. 

One thing I do love is making breakfast, I do a damn fine french omelette and one of my favorite memories of time with BSB is being at a friend's house and his wife serving up this huge breakfast for everyone that was there.  Great warm fuzzies for all.


edited by BGB for spelling... :)




WhiplashSmile2 -> RE: Breakfast (11/10/2008 9:00:11 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: heartfeltsub

Whiplash, i don't know you from Adam, but i really felt it was important to reiterate the comment Steel is making. There are a lot of your posts which seem to be looking for some sort of validation. Given some of your other posts about emotional issues that you are working through, it might be something that you should look at. Why it either (a) comes across as looking for validation or (b) if you are really looking for validation.

heartfelt


Heartfelt, here is perhaps what bothers me some at the moment.  I have met the most amazing girl, she means a lot to me.  However, she's been in a seriously messed up and bad abusive D/s relationship.  In fact she's dealt with a number of Doms online or LD who had similar issues.   At one time she expressed that she's not used to a Dom like me.   My heart is somewhat troubled that frankly there are so many assholes out there that are playing and acting all mean, bossy, rough and tough, and really could give a rats ass less about their submissive partner.  This sort of irks me. 

If anything, her past pains and bad experiences bothers me.  It's just sterotypical behaviors that have been carried way to far.

Validation? Sure, I'll give you that one.  Yes, it is a form of validation for me in some or many regards as well.  Making posts for multiple reasons here. 

Oh wait, good lord, whiplash smile had a friggen mental melt down last week, made a public message board posting.  Should I let the stop me from posting to the threads.   OK I have a few issues, does this automatically mean, that everything I post about is some great ill fated issue? 

This is the reason why some people keep quiet about personal issues, because other people will start to look at them as being broken or keep dragging it up from thread to thread or posting to posting.  So yeah.

Does not really matter if what I'm expressing is personal or not in nature.  Think everybody makes a post or starts a thread because the topic or issue is of personal interest.  Mmmmmmm... 

It's kind of interesting, to have something else from another thread tossed back up into this one.  Perhaps they are somewhat connected.  Perhaps, I'm working my way back to my own sense of value after I had done something I personally felt was wrong.  Who the hell knows?  I'm not even thinking about that.  At least not with conscious thought involved.. LOL...




oceanwynds -> RE: Breakfast, (11/10/2008 9:02:00 AM)

quote:

Perhaps posts like these will be useful for newbies to read and think about, perhaps those people that feel a bit lost at times, because they don't fit into the stereotype fantasy images of the lifestyle


I have found posts similiar to these to be very benificial to me.  These type of threads help me to get past the cookie cutter version of D/s, which is not a part of Sir's and my relationship.

I thank you for posting this. Sir likes to make the coffee and serve me a cup at times. There are times he likes to give me a back massage. He enjoys doing things for me and I find it complimentary to his Dominance.
blessings
oceanwynds




Maya2001 -> RE: Breakfast (11/10/2008 9:05:46 AM)

Whiplash I agree with you that this post may have great value to newbies --  to view Dominants as human beings and that good  D/s  & M/s relationships are  caring partnerships ..it is not just one sided of one giving all and the other taking  




sunshinedreams -> RE: Breakfast (11/10/2008 9:08:52 AM)

I do all the baking and He cooks all the Thai food. We each cook whatever else when we want to eat. We're both good cooks, and we each cook different foods, so we eat very well. I suppose the dominant side comes out in the kitchen when He tells me that I need to make Him cookies.[;)]




heartfeltsub -> RE: Breakfast (11/10/2008 9:12:47 AM)

You have mail on the other side.

heartfelt




SOsMINE -> RE: Breakfast (11/10/2008 9:21:44 AM)

Whiplash I am glad you posted.  I wished there were more posts like this when I first came into the lifestyle actively seeking a Dominant.  I had to flounder along looking and weeding through Dominants.  It took me 3 years to finally find the blending of the vanilla and lifestyle in one relationship.  It just came so easily with S O.  Again great post in my humble opinion.  (hey I don't get all humble too often)  LOL
~d~




DavanKael -> RE: Breakfast (11/10/2008 9:32:23 AM)

Different things work within different relationships and pragmatism as opposed to dogma and strict protocol makes more sense to me personally and, as others have pointed out, there's not always a clear delination between service and being served and I don't think that there needs to be.  :> 
  Davan




lusciouslips19 -> RE: Breakfast (11/10/2008 9:38:07 AM)

My Warden makes great meatloaf and chicken with pasta. I do more complicated things but have inspired him with mine. For instance I made homemade pizza and left yeast. So when he had no bread but ingredients to make it he decided to try to make bread. he never thought about anyone actually doing it until he saw me making pizza dough. Or this weekend when i took the leftover crab from the restaurant, brought it home and made crabcakes. he'll probably try it in the future as he knows now how easy it is. We are very influential on each other in alot of ways, not just with food.




mc1234 -> RE: Breakfast (11/10/2008 9:54:49 AM)

Whiplash, you've made some very good points on this thread.  I, for one, haven't had the full D/s relationship yet - one that is a blend of the BDSM stuff and vanilla.  I'm starting out on one now that I'm very hopeful about ... he has an actual sense of humor, is interested in me as a person, likes me to tease him and doesn't do any posturing.  And on top of all of that ... the chemistry and sizzle is there.  We'll see where this goes - but I do know that a couple of years ago I wouldn't have been able to imagine that all of this can be blended into a D/s relationship.  In my naivete, I may have passed him by, thinking he wasn't 'domly' enough.  I'm glad I've learned enough through life experiences and reading the boards to know differently. [:)]  




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